The Colbert Report taping reporT: January 10th, 2007.
This is sort of stream-of-conscious-y and it might be incoherent, but hopefully you'll all dig it anyway.
Okay. Tale end of winter break. I scored tickets for The Colbert Report for January 10, 2007. I invited my dad. This is the story:
So basically, my dad and I got in line at 3:30 and it was FREEZING cold. And the minutes were just crawling by. Someone in line behind us sent a box of donuts up at one point saying it was communal food and then a few minutes later a bag of Hershey's kisses came up, which was very sweet of them. And then the girls in line ahead of me sent a note back saying "Thank you!" and then the note came back saying "You're welcome" and...well, it was cute, and a nice distraction, passing that stuff up and down. Kept my mind off the fact that I was freezing to death.
A little after 4:00 PM I believe Mark came out and went up and down the line saying hi to people and asking if we had any questions. My dad was sort of hopping up and down and commenting about the windchill and Mark looked way sympathetic and was like "Yeah, we need to look into getting space heaters out here or something." My dad told him we'd come all the way from California to see the show and Mark seemed impressed. "Wow! Well, thank you for coming!" (It was a slight stretch of the truth, though...I was home in San Francisco for winter break but I go to Vassar, which is 90 minutes north of NYC, and I don't really live at home full-time anymore, and I was on my way back to school anyway so it's not like I was going out of my way to come to a taping...my dad on the other hand, he definitely took time off from work for this. Hahahaha. Anyway.) Mark mentioned to us in line that they had finally gotten confirmation that Bill O'Reilly was coming on the show the next week and the whole lot of us got way excited.
So then more and more people start showing up and I'm just trying to stay warm and then finally 6:00 rolls around and they let the VIPs in and then they let us in and give us our numbers and all that jazz. We got inside and even though it was significantly warmer I was still shivering and kept my coat on. Another staffer came out and told us to be enthusiastic and loud and laugh a lot, and gave us the ground rules for asking Stephen questions when the time came (i.e. don't ask him to touch you or if you can have some of his Formula). "Try to come up with something new and creative for him if you can, something he hasn't heard before," she said.
And oh, I knew what my question was going to be.
Because the night before, on the January 9th show, Stephen had done the first edition of his new segment "We the Mediator," about celebrity feuds. And among the feuds he decided to cover?
Shah Rukh Khan vs. Amitabh Bachchan, "the prince and king of Bollywood".
For those of you who know me, I have been Bollywood-obsessed for ages. I graduated from high school and the underclassmen knew me as Bollywood Girl. I have made it my mission to turn as many of my non-Indian friends as possible into Bollywood fans (or at least Bollywood-aware). My friend Chris has spent so much time around me and heard my various rants and insights and observations about the Bombay film industry (and has had so many song and film clips inflicted upon him) that when the topic came up amongst a group of people he was with recently, he found himself able to speak with some authority on the topic because of my influence.
Furthermore, Shah Rukh Khan...oh man. He's been my absolute FAVORITE since I was about 15. He's beautiful and amazing and talented and so funny and in real life, very articulate and generous. So in my mind, this supposed "feud" between him and Amitabh Bachchan? As far as I was concerned, I was on Shah Rukh's side. So when Stephen compared the clips of Shah Rukh and Amitabh in Mohabbatein (a very uneven film, I might add) and proclaimed that based on dance moves alone (or according to his "bhangra-meter," which made me giggle), he had to say Shah Rukh was the winner, I was ecstatic. I highly approved.
But then one day later, there I was in the studio and I wanted to ask Stephen a question. And to tell the truth, in the past year, in the aftermath of the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner and the whole amazing first year of TCR, much to the shock of my close friends, Stephen Colbert has officially surpassed Shah Rukh Khan as my #1 Male Celebrity of Choice. (Yes, it's true folks. I heart Stephen more than I heart SRK. It's a close call, but I have to go with Stephen.)
So I decided that I would bite the bullet, and sell out Shah Rukh in order to have a kick-ass question for Stephen.
Dad and I had really good seats--we were all the way to the left, second row from the front. At some points the camera was blocking our view, but for the most part we had a pretty clear view of Stephen's desk. The warm-up guy came out first--it was Paul Mercurio, who said he worked at The Daily Show and was filling in for the usual warm-up dude, I guess. He was pretty funny, interacting with various audience members and messing with them and such. He had a back-and-forth with my dad (and Dad was able to keep up, which was pretty awesome...my dad is great). Someone sitting further down my row apparently mistook him for Paul Dinello and shouted out "Geoffrey!" when he first came out, which pretty much baffled the whole crowd (not to mention Mercurio). I don't really see how that guy made that mistake; pretty much the only things the two guys have in common are their first names and the fact that they have wavy-ish dark brown hair...but no matter.
And then, finally, out came Stephen! He was wearing a really nice suit. I almost couldn't contain myself. The crowd was going wild (if you remember, we were the first standing ovation of 2007). The Q&A started and my hand shot up. He first took a question from a girl in the front row who asked him something to the effect of if there were any elements of a real-life relationship that snuck into the whole Noblet-Jellineck relationship on Strangers with Candy. Stephen gave a noncommittal answer which was ripe for misinterpretation (which is most likely exactly what he intended...hehehehehe).
Then he called on me.
I stood up and I remember I was talking really fast because I was kind of nervous. "Okay," I said. "So I know TV Stephen doesn't like to change his opinions, but I have to ask you about your 'We the Mediator' segment last night, where you made a decision about the feud between the two Bollywood actors?"
"Oh yeah!" Stephen said. "Amitabh Bachchan and Shah Rukh Khan! Yeah!" (By the way, I am impressed that he was able to pronounce their names without too much difficulty. Very impressive for a non-Indian, I must say.)
"It looked like you were making that decision based solely on dancing," I started.
"Yeah, did you see that? Amitabh wasn't even trying!" Stephen said. "Now Shah Rukh, you know, Shah Rukh's got the moves!" AND HE LAUNCHED INTO AN IMPRESSION OF SHAH RUKH KHAN'S DANCING. I was laughing hysterically and trying to finish my question and the audience was laughing too and I was afraid I wouldn't get to finish my question because the sight of Stephen dancing was just so adorable and distracting. (And holy god, one of the men I admire most impersonating the other man I admire the most...worlds colliding...my head nearly exploded.)
So then he stopped dancing around and walked back over to me and I finished my question. "Okay, but did you know Shah Rukh and Amitabh were in a movie together that came out last August, and Shah Rukh doesn't dance AT ALL, but Amitabh not only dances, but he wears fur coats, swanky eyeglasses, and gets with a lot of younger white women?!"
Stephen stopped cold and looked me straight in the eye. (I must say, I really do love the way he makes complete eye contact with everyone who asks him a question. He's really good at making a personal connection. If it weren't for the whole audience around me, I'd have felt like it was just me and him shooting the breeze about Bollywood.) "I may have judged too soon," he said solemnly.
"Yeah, see, I thought so!" I said.
He pointed backstage-ish to one of a multitude of random staffers that were milling about. "Look into this!" he said.
And then he moved on to the next question. Someone asked him if he'd ever considered growing a beard, someone asked him why Lutherans were "On Notice" (heehee!), someone asked him if he'd ever had formal voice training (and he sang to her, which was way cute) and then someone else asked if he had ever considered releasing a Christmas album (heeheeheeheehee!). He confirmed the Bill O'Reilly booking for us when asked and again, we got way excited.
And then...show time. The taping went off without a hitch. No flubs or retakes. The Tek Jansen cartoon was funnier, but even better (as others who have attended tapings have said) was watching Stephen watch the cartoon. He just was so amused by it. It was adorable. As was him singing and dancing along to the music during the commercial breaks.
And then it was all over. But I was satisfied. Yes, I had sold out my beloved Shah Rukh Khan, but I asked Stephen a question that odds are he NEVER heard before (and would never hear again). If I believed in God, I would think it was a sign, having my two obsessions combined for me like that in perfect timing for me to go to a taping.
But the story doesn't end here...cut to last Thursday, which was the date of the Bill O'Reilly show. I was back on campus, and had wasted no time telling my friends about my Colbert taping adventure. And then I had to watch the show for the meeting of Stephen and Papa Bear.
And then he did "We the Mediator" again. And said that he normally doesn't like to change his opinion, but...he took back his Donald vs. Rosie opinion. AND CHANGED HIS OPINION ON SHAH RUKH VS. AMITABH.
He showed a clip of Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham as his evidence for changing his mind, and even though that wasn't the movie I mentioned to him, it worked. My friends and I were FLIPPING OUT. I almost couldn't pay attention to the O'Reilly segment.
So okay. The running joke among me and my friends now is that I personally influenced content on The Colbert Report. Me, Reeya Banerjee. I am personally responsible for them revisiting the Khan/Bachchan feud. Now, I'm not so silly and delusional as to take entire credit for it. There is a lot that goes into producing any show, and it's not like one audience member could REALLY influence an entire segment. I'm a fangirl, but I'm not INSANE.
(But honestly, the Bollywood feud thing is so obscure...why would they have gone to the trouble to research other movies that King Khan and the Big B have been in together if I hadn't given them the idea...? Hahahahaha.)
Seriously. I'm not going to run around claiming in all honesty that I in fact am the sole reason why that second "We the Mediator" thing happened. But if I did have any part in giving them the idea to revisit the feud...well...I am insanely flattered.
And obviously, they should employ me. (Kidding! I mean, I girl can dream, right?)
************
I must say that I am kind of weirded out by how much Bollywood has been mentioned in Western media as of late. In addition to the two Colbert segments, there's been the big brouhaha over Shilpa Shetty on the UK edition of Big Brother and how other castmates were bullying her with racist comments. Which is deplorable, and sickens me. I have always liked Shilpa Shetty, and I give her credit for hanging in there (though I do wonder why she even agreed to be on the show?). It's been all over various news feeds, CNN.com, BBC.com, it was Wikipedia's pick for news of the day yesterday...it's crazy. Poor Shilpa.
And jesus, also, the whole Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai getting engaged thing?! I like Abhishek (even though he will NEVER be as talented as his father--Amitabh will always trump Abhishek in my book), but I cannot stand Aishwarya. She's a humorless talentless hack. I suspect it's all a big publicity stunt on her part; she likes to be seen with the latest "It" boy (remember her relationship with Vivek Oberoi when he was on his way up?). I don't know if this will last. If so, then good. If not, then...well, I was right.
But it's CRAZY how much press they're getting even over here. I watched SNL this past weekend for the first time in forever and it was mentioned on Weekend Update (saying that their relationship can be termed as "Aishwaryashek"--kind of like Brangelina, or, dare I say it, Filliam H. Muffman). Craziness, man. I've been obesessed with the cinema of the motherland (hah!) for so many years and now the Western media is finally jumping on the bandwagon. (Amy Pohler completely BUTCHERED their names, though. Again, gotta give Stephen Colbert credit for getting those names right. Not only did he do a good job with pronouncing Amitabh and Shah Rukh, but he also did well with Vivek Oberoi and Rani Mukherjee [whose last name could've been a toughie for him]. The only one he messed up was Preity Zinta--he called her Pri-ehty. But it's cool. That's a toughie, too. Can't expect people who are so unfamilliar with the names to get them all right.)
Funny that all this Bollywood stuff is coming up just as I am finishing my senior year in college and winding up work on my magnum opus, my baby, my senior thesis. I am the first film major at Vassar to write a thesis on Bollywood, and it's really just INSANE to see it in the media here like this. It kind of makes me insanely happy. This isn't to say that doing this thesis has been all good; in fact, it's sort of killed my enthusiasm for the Bombay film industry for a while. I've overdosed. I need to take a long break from Bollywood when this is done. Two more weeks, and I turn in the damn thiing, and I can finally turn my focus away from Bollywood cinema and towards more pressing matters...like finding employment. I'm graduating in May, and holy hell, do I need to find a job.
Um...dude...The Colbert Report SHOULD employ me.
(Kidding! Again, there's no harm in me dreaming.)
Okay, back to the thesis.
************
It occurs to me that I should edit this to add that the movie I was referring to when I asked Stephen Colbert the question? The movie in which Shah Rukh does not dance but Amitabh does (and also wears fur coats and swanky eyeglasses and gets with younger white women)? It's called Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna, and was shot in fall/winter of 2005 entirely on location in New York. Not only does this film play a significant role in my Bollywood thesis, but...I was an extra in it! (Some of you regular readers are well aware of this.) I appear in two scenes: first, towards the beginning of the film, I am visible wearing a pink sari during the Rani Mukherjee/Abhishek Bachchan wedding sequence. I can be seen walking behind a crowd of people following the horse-drawn carriage carrying Amitabh and Abhishek to the wedding, and then again during the ceremony I am first visible in the crowd of people behind Amitabh and Rani as he walks her to the mandap and again in a line of women watching the ceremony. Several scenes later, I am visible during a scene shot in the New Haven train station, where Rani tries to rescue Shah Rukh's son (thinking Shah Rukh had kidnapped him) and Shah Rukh thinks Rani is kidnapping his son and chases her. I can be seen all over the place in this scene; oftentimes it looks like I am in two or three places at once because I am in so many random shots. My friend Chris refers to this as The Amazing Multi-Location Reeya scene. Anyway, in the process of being an extra in two scenes, I got to meet Amitabh Bachchan (actually, a whole crew of us who were extras in the wedding scene sort of ambushed him outside his hotel and asked for a photo, which he graciously agreed to do) annnnnnd I got to meet Shah Rukh, which was really just a fulfillment of a long-time dream. I sorta considered mentioning this when I asked Stephen my question, but then I figured that would be too self-indulgent and horrendously overkill. (He used Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham instead when he revisted the feud, but it's okay...even though Shah Rukh totally does dance in that movie as well, and I think he still dances better than Amitabh...but whatever, I'm just being all nitpicky and blah blah blah I'm hyper and totally avoiding my thesis by extending this post.)
And I'm gonna share my Bollywood photos with you all because...I can.
So here's a bunch of us with Amitabh outside his hotel. We were just way too excited. Sadly I don't remember anyone's name. That's me on the far left in the black sweater, looking particularly dopey. Amitabh looks kind of worn out here. It was the end of a very long day, and really, honestly, very nice of him to stop and let us take a photo.
And OMG here's me with Shah Rukh. The nicest guy ever. He autographed a DVD for me. It was 4 AM after a LONG day at the New Haven train station (they started shooting at noon) and he was exhausted and going back to Bombay the next day and was nice enough to stop and take a photo with some of us and sign autographs. I couldn't stop thanking him, and all I remember him saying was, "No, it's fine, it's quite all right, no need to thank me." Seriously, the most gracious human being on the planet. And the hardest-working (man, watching him work all day...he had more energy than anyone else on the set). He didn't have to be so nice to me and the other extras who were begging for autographs. I mean, he's the biggest movie star in India. He doesn't owe us anyhting. But he didn't even hesitate when we approached him, which was just so sweet of him.
So okay. I've met SRK. (I've even met Amitabh, but that doesn't matter so much to me.) And I had a bit of an exchange with Stephen during the Q&A. I'd love to actually meet Stephen, but for now, the thought that I may have possibly personally influenced content on TCR is good enough for me.
Yeah, TCR totally should employ me. (And this joke has officially gotten old.)
Back to the thesis for reals.
Okay. Tale end of winter break. I scored tickets for The Colbert Report for January 10, 2007. I invited my dad. This is the story:
So basically, my dad and I got in line at 3:30 and it was FREEZING cold. And the minutes were just crawling by. Someone in line behind us sent a box of donuts up at one point saying it was communal food and then a few minutes later a bag of Hershey's kisses came up, which was very sweet of them. And then the girls in line ahead of me sent a note back saying "Thank you!" and then the note came back saying "You're welcome" and...well, it was cute, and a nice distraction, passing that stuff up and down. Kept my mind off the fact that I was freezing to death.
A little after 4:00 PM I believe Mark came out and went up and down the line saying hi to people and asking if we had any questions. My dad was sort of hopping up and down and commenting about the windchill and Mark looked way sympathetic and was like "Yeah, we need to look into getting space heaters out here or something." My dad told him we'd come all the way from California to see the show and Mark seemed impressed. "Wow! Well, thank you for coming!" (It was a slight stretch of the truth, though...I was home in San Francisco for winter break but I go to Vassar, which is 90 minutes north of NYC, and I don't really live at home full-time anymore, and I was on my way back to school anyway so it's not like I was going out of my way to come to a taping...my dad on the other hand, he definitely took time off from work for this. Hahahaha. Anyway.) Mark mentioned to us in line that they had finally gotten confirmation that Bill O'Reilly was coming on the show the next week and the whole lot of us got way excited.
So then more and more people start showing up and I'm just trying to stay warm and then finally 6:00 rolls around and they let the VIPs in and then they let us in and give us our numbers and all that jazz. We got inside and even though it was significantly warmer I was still shivering and kept my coat on. Another staffer came out and told us to be enthusiastic and loud and laugh a lot, and gave us the ground rules for asking Stephen questions when the time came (i.e. don't ask him to touch you or if you can have some of his Formula). "Try to come up with something new and creative for him if you can, something he hasn't heard before," she said.
And oh, I knew what my question was going to be.
Because the night before, on the January 9th show, Stephen had done the first edition of his new segment "We the Mediator," about celebrity feuds. And among the feuds he decided to cover?
Shah Rukh Khan vs. Amitabh Bachchan, "the prince and king of Bollywood".
For those of you who know me, I have been Bollywood-obsessed for ages. I graduated from high school and the underclassmen knew me as Bollywood Girl. I have made it my mission to turn as many of my non-Indian friends as possible into Bollywood fans (or at least Bollywood-aware). My friend Chris has spent so much time around me and heard my various rants and insights and observations about the Bombay film industry (and has had so many song and film clips inflicted upon him) that when the topic came up amongst a group of people he was with recently, he found himself able to speak with some authority on the topic because of my influence.
Furthermore, Shah Rukh Khan...oh man. He's been my absolute FAVORITE since I was about 15. He's beautiful and amazing and talented and so funny and in real life, very articulate and generous. So in my mind, this supposed "feud" between him and Amitabh Bachchan? As far as I was concerned, I was on Shah Rukh's side. So when Stephen compared the clips of Shah Rukh and Amitabh in Mohabbatein (a very uneven film, I might add) and proclaimed that based on dance moves alone (or according to his "bhangra-meter," which made me giggle), he had to say Shah Rukh was the winner, I was ecstatic. I highly approved.
But then one day later, there I was in the studio and I wanted to ask Stephen a question. And to tell the truth, in the past year, in the aftermath of the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner and the whole amazing first year of TCR, much to the shock of my close friends, Stephen Colbert has officially surpassed Shah Rukh Khan as my #1 Male Celebrity of Choice. (Yes, it's true folks. I heart Stephen more than I heart SRK. It's a close call, but I have to go with Stephen.)
So I decided that I would bite the bullet, and sell out Shah Rukh in order to have a kick-ass question for Stephen.
Dad and I had really good seats--we were all the way to the left, second row from the front. At some points the camera was blocking our view, but for the most part we had a pretty clear view of Stephen's desk. The warm-up guy came out first--it was Paul Mercurio, who said he worked at The Daily Show and was filling in for the usual warm-up dude, I guess. He was pretty funny, interacting with various audience members and messing with them and such. He had a back-and-forth with my dad (and Dad was able to keep up, which was pretty awesome...my dad is great). Someone sitting further down my row apparently mistook him for Paul Dinello and shouted out "Geoffrey!" when he first came out, which pretty much baffled the whole crowd (not to mention Mercurio). I don't really see how that guy made that mistake; pretty much the only things the two guys have in common are their first names and the fact that they have wavy-ish dark brown hair...but no matter.
And then, finally, out came Stephen! He was wearing a really nice suit. I almost couldn't contain myself. The crowd was going wild (if you remember, we were the first standing ovation of 2007). The Q&A started and my hand shot up. He first took a question from a girl in the front row who asked him something to the effect of if there were any elements of a real-life relationship that snuck into the whole Noblet-Jellineck relationship on Strangers with Candy. Stephen gave a noncommittal answer which was ripe for misinterpretation (which is most likely exactly what he intended...hehehehehe).
Then he called on me.
I stood up and I remember I was talking really fast because I was kind of nervous. "Okay," I said. "So I know TV Stephen doesn't like to change his opinions, but I have to ask you about your 'We the Mediator' segment last night, where you made a decision about the feud between the two Bollywood actors?"
"Oh yeah!" Stephen said. "Amitabh Bachchan and Shah Rukh Khan! Yeah!" (By the way, I am impressed that he was able to pronounce their names without too much difficulty. Very impressive for a non-Indian, I must say.)
"It looked like you were making that decision based solely on dancing," I started.
"Yeah, did you see that? Amitabh wasn't even trying!" Stephen said. "Now Shah Rukh, you know, Shah Rukh's got the moves!" AND HE LAUNCHED INTO AN IMPRESSION OF SHAH RUKH KHAN'S DANCING. I was laughing hysterically and trying to finish my question and the audience was laughing too and I was afraid I wouldn't get to finish my question because the sight of Stephen dancing was just so adorable and distracting. (And holy god, one of the men I admire most impersonating the other man I admire the most...worlds colliding...my head nearly exploded.)
So then he stopped dancing around and walked back over to me and I finished my question. "Okay, but did you know Shah Rukh and Amitabh were in a movie together that came out last August, and Shah Rukh doesn't dance AT ALL, but Amitabh not only dances, but he wears fur coats, swanky eyeglasses, and gets with a lot of younger white women?!"
Stephen stopped cold and looked me straight in the eye. (I must say, I really do love the way he makes complete eye contact with everyone who asks him a question. He's really good at making a personal connection. If it weren't for the whole audience around me, I'd have felt like it was just me and him shooting the breeze about Bollywood.) "I may have judged too soon," he said solemnly.
"Yeah, see, I thought so!" I said.
He pointed backstage-ish to one of a multitude of random staffers that were milling about. "Look into this!" he said.
And then he moved on to the next question. Someone asked him if he'd ever considered growing a beard, someone asked him why Lutherans were "On Notice" (heehee!), someone asked him if he'd ever had formal voice training (and he sang to her, which was way cute) and then someone else asked if he had ever considered releasing a Christmas album (heeheeheeheehee!). He confirmed the Bill O'Reilly booking for us when asked and again, we got way excited.
And then...show time. The taping went off without a hitch. No flubs or retakes. The Tek Jansen cartoon was funnier, but even better (as others who have attended tapings have said) was watching Stephen watch the cartoon. He just was so amused by it. It was adorable. As was him singing and dancing along to the music during the commercial breaks.
And then it was all over. But I was satisfied. Yes, I had sold out my beloved Shah Rukh Khan, but I asked Stephen a question that odds are he NEVER heard before (and would never hear again). If I believed in God, I would think it was a sign, having my two obsessions combined for me like that in perfect timing for me to go to a taping.
But the story doesn't end here...cut to last Thursday, which was the date of the Bill O'Reilly show. I was back on campus, and had wasted no time telling my friends about my Colbert taping adventure. And then I had to watch the show for the meeting of Stephen and Papa Bear.
And then he did "We the Mediator" again. And said that he normally doesn't like to change his opinion, but...he took back his Donald vs. Rosie opinion. AND CHANGED HIS OPINION ON SHAH RUKH VS. AMITABH.
He showed a clip of Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham as his evidence for changing his mind, and even though that wasn't the movie I mentioned to him, it worked. My friends and I were FLIPPING OUT. I almost couldn't pay attention to the O'Reilly segment.
So okay. The running joke among me and my friends now is that I personally influenced content on The Colbert Report. Me, Reeya Banerjee. I am personally responsible for them revisiting the Khan/Bachchan feud. Now, I'm not so silly and delusional as to take entire credit for it. There is a lot that goes into producing any show, and it's not like one audience member could REALLY influence an entire segment. I'm a fangirl, but I'm not INSANE.
(But honestly, the Bollywood feud thing is so obscure...why would they have gone to the trouble to research other movies that King Khan and the Big B have been in together if I hadn't given them the idea...? Hahahahaha.)
Seriously. I'm not going to run around claiming in all honesty that I in fact am the sole reason why that second "We the Mediator" thing happened. But if I did have any part in giving them the idea to revisit the feud...well...I am insanely flattered.
And obviously, they should employ me. (Kidding! I mean, I girl can dream, right?)
************
I must say that I am kind of weirded out by how much Bollywood has been mentioned in Western media as of late. In addition to the two Colbert segments, there's been the big brouhaha over Shilpa Shetty on the UK edition of Big Brother and how other castmates were bullying her with racist comments. Which is deplorable, and sickens me. I have always liked Shilpa Shetty, and I give her credit for hanging in there (though I do wonder why she even agreed to be on the show?). It's been all over various news feeds, CNN.com, BBC.com, it was Wikipedia's pick for news of the day yesterday...it's crazy. Poor Shilpa.
And jesus, also, the whole Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai getting engaged thing?! I like Abhishek (even though he will NEVER be as talented as his father--Amitabh will always trump Abhishek in my book), but I cannot stand Aishwarya. She's a humorless talentless hack. I suspect it's all a big publicity stunt on her part; she likes to be seen with the latest "It" boy (remember her relationship with Vivek Oberoi when he was on his way up?). I don't know if this will last. If so, then good. If not, then...well, I was right.
But it's CRAZY how much press they're getting even over here. I watched SNL this past weekend for the first time in forever and it was mentioned on Weekend Update (saying that their relationship can be termed as "Aishwaryashek"--kind of like Brangelina, or, dare I say it, Filliam H. Muffman). Craziness, man. I've been obesessed with the cinema of the motherland (hah!) for so many years and now the Western media is finally jumping on the bandwagon. (Amy Pohler completely BUTCHERED their names, though. Again, gotta give Stephen Colbert credit for getting those names right. Not only did he do a good job with pronouncing Amitabh and Shah Rukh, but he also did well with Vivek Oberoi and Rani Mukherjee [whose last name could've been a toughie for him]. The only one he messed up was Preity Zinta--he called her Pri-ehty. But it's cool. That's a toughie, too. Can't expect people who are so unfamilliar with the names to get them all right.)
Funny that all this Bollywood stuff is coming up just as I am finishing my senior year in college and winding up work on my magnum opus, my baby, my senior thesis. I am the first film major at Vassar to write a thesis on Bollywood, and it's really just INSANE to see it in the media here like this. It kind of makes me insanely happy. This isn't to say that doing this thesis has been all good; in fact, it's sort of killed my enthusiasm for the Bombay film industry for a while. I've overdosed. I need to take a long break from Bollywood when this is done. Two more weeks, and I turn in the damn thiing, and I can finally turn my focus away from Bollywood cinema and towards more pressing matters...like finding employment. I'm graduating in May, and holy hell, do I need to find a job.
Um...dude...The Colbert Report SHOULD employ me.
(Kidding! Again, there's no harm in me dreaming.)
Okay, back to the thesis.
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It occurs to me that I should edit this to add that the movie I was referring to when I asked Stephen Colbert the question? The movie in which Shah Rukh does not dance but Amitabh does (and also wears fur coats and swanky eyeglasses and gets with younger white women)? It's called Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna, and was shot in fall/winter of 2005 entirely on location in New York. Not only does this film play a significant role in my Bollywood thesis, but...I was an extra in it! (Some of you regular readers are well aware of this.) I appear in two scenes: first, towards the beginning of the film, I am visible wearing a pink sari during the Rani Mukherjee/Abhishek Bachchan wedding sequence. I can be seen walking behind a crowd of people following the horse-drawn carriage carrying Amitabh and Abhishek to the wedding, and then again during the ceremony I am first visible in the crowd of people behind Amitabh and Rani as he walks her to the mandap and again in a line of women watching the ceremony. Several scenes later, I am visible during a scene shot in the New Haven train station, where Rani tries to rescue Shah Rukh's son (thinking Shah Rukh had kidnapped him) and Shah Rukh thinks Rani is kidnapping his son and chases her. I can be seen all over the place in this scene; oftentimes it looks like I am in two or three places at once because I am in so many random shots. My friend Chris refers to this as The Amazing Multi-Location Reeya scene. Anyway, in the process of being an extra in two scenes, I got to meet Amitabh Bachchan (actually, a whole crew of us who were extras in the wedding scene sort of ambushed him outside his hotel and asked for a photo, which he graciously agreed to do) annnnnnd I got to meet Shah Rukh, which was really just a fulfillment of a long-time dream. I sorta considered mentioning this when I asked Stephen my question, but then I figured that would be too self-indulgent and horrendously overkill. (He used Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham instead when he revisted the feud, but it's okay...even though Shah Rukh totally does dance in that movie as well, and I think he still dances better than Amitabh...but whatever, I'm just being all nitpicky and blah blah blah I'm hyper and totally avoiding my thesis by extending this post.)
And I'm gonna share my Bollywood photos with you all because...I can.
So here's a bunch of us with Amitabh outside his hotel. We were just way too excited. Sadly I don't remember anyone's name. That's me on the far left in the black sweater, looking particularly dopey. Amitabh looks kind of worn out here. It was the end of a very long day, and really, honestly, very nice of him to stop and let us take a photo.
And OMG here's me with Shah Rukh. The nicest guy ever. He autographed a DVD for me. It was 4 AM after a LONG day at the New Haven train station (they started shooting at noon) and he was exhausted and going back to Bombay the next day and was nice enough to stop and take a photo with some of us and sign autographs. I couldn't stop thanking him, and all I remember him saying was, "No, it's fine, it's quite all right, no need to thank me." Seriously, the most gracious human being on the planet. And the hardest-working (man, watching him work all day...he had more energy than anyone else on the set). He didn't have to be so nice to me and the other extras who were begging for autographs. I mean, he's the biggest movie star in India. He doesn't owe us anyhting. But he didn't even hesitate when we approached him, which was just so sweet of him.
So okay. I've met SRK. (I've even met Amitabh, but that doesn't matter so much to me.) And I had a bit of an exchange with Stephen during the Q&A. I'd love to actually meet Stephen, but for now, the thought that I may have possibly personally influenced content on TCR is good enough for me.
Yeah, TCR totally should employ me. (And this joke has officially gotten old.)
Back to the thesis for reals.