Obscurity

[mel0804]

Pairing: Ennis/Jack
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17 (Warning: violence !)
Summary: AU_AU. With this story I wanted to dive in the dark side of Brokeback Mountain. I wanted to experiment with fear, uncertainty and doubt. Ennis and Jack meet each other in the modern time.
Dedication: This story is dedicated to my German beta tanzmaeusi, who encouraged me to write this

Comments

[aileenfan]

Well, it is dark, but I love it. I'm looking forward to see the development of their friendship. I hope they'll be able to ease each other's pain a little. It is hard to read, but I really like stories like this, if only there's a happy ending:)

[mel0804]

They will ease each other's pain, that's for sure.
And I also think the ending will be happy - in a certain way... But until the end there are a few more chapters to enjoy... ;-)

[gres1]

Hi Mel, i just finished the first three installments and all i can say is that despite it is dark it is pulling the reader with such a force that you can't resist but follow them both in their loneliness and in their sleep and their awakening.....and as s'one else commented i too see a few connections.I'm looking forward to more.
And my copliments to your beta, too. Great work!!!

Happy

[mel0804]

Hi,

thank you so much for your comment !! It's the best compliment I can ever get when you let me know you could feel the feelings that I tried to evoke. I'm really glad it worked - and I hope it will work within the following chapters, too ;-)...

[rosiet]

Wow. Mel. I can taste Ennis' lonliness...this is just so sad! Ennis so lonely, Jack so tormented. It was heartbreaking Jack being a little too afraid to ask ennis how Ted was...I really would be sooo happy for these two to find a little comfort in each other. You have made me love them both already...I can't wait for more of this.

Rosie
x

[mel0804]

You know, first I wasn't so sure how I would feel towards a lonely Ennis and a tormented Jack. When I started this story I felt a little distance to both of them - but that changed very fast and to be honest: these two are the Ennis and Jack I love the most from all the stories I've written so far...

[ramona4jake]

So heartbreaking, but also beautiful the scene between Jack and Ennis ! Poor Jack, his soul is shattered and yet he can find the power to smile to Ennis and, more, to observe his eyes "Lifeless and broken like his own. But not cold. Not cold at all…."
Wonderful, mel, thank you !

[mel0804]

This is why I love cannon-Jack so much. His ability to stand up again even if fate turned against him. I adored him for being brave and for giving Ennis one chance after another - even if it tore him apart.
And I tried to give "my" Jack some of these character traits, too.

[liseron]

Hi Mel , woaow , a very dark one !
But I don't really care , your writing is so good ! As usual you certainly know how to construct an atmospher and a scenery !
So much loneliness in their lives , it's heartwrenching ...
This sequence where Ennis doesn't kill the spider because it's the only other thing alive in his apartment , besides him ...So sad and so vivid!
I don't know how you manage to have all these stories in progress , but please Mel , don't sleep only in front of your computer ! Get in your bed from time to time , for your own health!... :-)))
Thanks, Mireille.

[mel0804]

*LOL*
I will do this - promise !
But you know, each story is perfect for one of my moods... And "Obscurity" really helped me to get over a very stessful and frustrating phase of my life - and the new story "Absolution" I started a few days ago will hopefully have the same effect on me. So all that I write is therapeutical in a certain way - and of course a LOT of fun !