The value of struggles...

[meladara]

A friend of mine reminded me today that sometimes it is important to remember the struggles of life because then the successes become more clear..

Here is my biggest struggle... and success, too.

Comments

[noxiaa]

*hugs you and snuggles or waves at your daughter, depending on how she responds to touch*

Reading your post made me tear up in the absolute best way. You have every reason to be a very proud Mama, and she sounds like an utterly wonderful girl! It also sounds like she has an amazing family. :)

She understands that she is more than the labels that are often applied to her. She sees the labels as tools and never crutches. And perhaps most importantly, they are never ever secrets.It took me until I was in my third decade to understand this, so thanks to the way you've raised her, she has a leg up on the vast majority of those who grew up without her unique take on the world

[meladara]

LOL! Yeah, not many hugs from her

[karelia]

Wow. Your post should be compulsory reading for every human being attempting to interact with others!

she doesn't understand how to interact fully does not equal she can't interact, which, clearly, you know. Just going by your post, she's probably taught a lot of wisdom to those around her - more than any teacher ever will.

[meladara]

Thank you. I think she is pretty amazing myself. :)

[hbart]

I have found in my time, that the most well rounded people are the ones who have a child with special needs, and also a child without special needs. Anyone who falls into the group of only having one or the other cannot fully understand how the other half live.

I think it is natural for people to want labels, because it helps us make sense of things we don't understand. But, as you've figured out, if they are used to restrict people they can be detrimental. I also think that people know one person who has Aspergers, for example, and then they assume that every single person with Aspergers will be identical.

I feel like the most important thing for any child is having a loving and understanding family, and it sounds like your daughter is very lucky in that respect. I hope you never lose your great outlook on life! Thanks for bringing up this topic as we can all use a reminder of how to treat others. Hang in there, it sounds like you are doing a great job!

[meladara]

Thank you! There are times when it isn't glamorous and in the early years I often felt like I was wasting my life staying at home raising kids. Because I was educated in order to have a career, wasn't I?! Modern woman don't stay home, which is where I knew I need and wanted to be! I am very lucky that my awesome friends, family, and husband remind me that what I do is valuable and important. Though my work in life isn't always fun, they never let me forget (for too long) that I'm damn good at it! :)

[teaoli]

You made me cry. Out of happiness. Every child (and adult and person-in-between) - special needs or not - deserves a family like yours. Understanding. Adaptable. Loving. Willing and able to recognise their individuality.

I agree with karelia: your post should be compulsory reading for all humans.

[meladara]

Aww... thank you. :)

We do try our best and I have to say that we have amazing children and my husband is also amazing. It isn't something I could do on my own, for sure!

[laralee88]

I wish more people had an outlook like this. All to often we forget to focus the child, but rather the disability or impairment. It is such an injustice. I had a student last year who was diagnosed with Dyslexia. We, his classmates and I, didn’t uphold the impairment, we held up the child. Labels can turn into nasty hindrances and have the capacity to devastate a child’s self-confidence and self-worth.

That is why I love teaching younger children. Their youth is something to be glorified because they truly see the world for what it is. Some people claim they are too naive or young to understand what they see. That is nothing more than a farce. Seeing the world through the eyes of a child is something special. Their views are truly unbiased and genuine.

The love and support of family and friends makes a big difference. Your daughter is truly blessed!

[meladara]

Thank you. I had a daycare (to make ends meet) for many years and everyday I would be amazed at the insight those little minds had, such kindness and understanding! I imagine teaching the younger years would be much the same.

It sounds to me that you are a great teacher and those kids were lucky to have you! This is one of the reasons why we homeschool - there are so many teachers that don't do this. My heart always hurts for those babies, who simply want to be like everyone else because they are shown everyday that they aren't good enough... *looks at soap box longingly* *steps back slowly* ;)