Fun times
Ok, long overdue entry. Welcome to the wacky world of IVF...
First, the DRUGS:
Oh my, are there a lot of drugs. I was told I was on the "Short Agonist Protocol" Ummmm... agonist? How apt. I started with a couple of days of pills. Then two injections (one to encourage eggs, another to ripen them). On the fourth day of injections a third one was added so that the eggs wouldn't pop out too soon. One of the injectors was a pen and sometimes it would run out of medication and I'd have to do a fourth injection. I even had to assemble stuff -- set up the pen and mix a liquid and powder and suck it up into the needle. By the end I was able to do the shots myself but it wasn't fun. Some of the meds burn a bit after being injected and I'd often feel a little ill as well as sore and itchy. After something like 11 days two meds were taken out and a double dose of another was added (whoo hoo! The trigger shot!).
All this for upwards of $3500. Thank goodness we have insurance!
While you're on the drugs there's also the Ultrasound:
This ain't no TV ultrasound. No gel on your belly, it's a wand and it doesn't even buy you dinner first. I lost count but there were at leave four or five during the process. Kind cool to be able to watch the follicles grow.
Follicles?
These are where the eggs grow. Sometimes but not always. I had seven big ones but only six produced eggs. Usually you'll have a couple competing to produce an egg and a lot of women can tell they're ovulating just by how that ovary feels. When you have a dozen or so follicles competing and seven are really big you *know* it. At the end some of them were over 20mm across. Ow.
Egg retrieval (or... "The needle goes WHERE?"):
HUGE props to DivaDaddy for going above and beyond on this one. He sat through the whole procedure with me even though he had a ton of work to do. We were doing the "married couple" thing and boy, do we do it well.
The fun starts the day before with a hefty dose of antibiotics and Ativan at bedtime. Then you fast from midnight until after the procedure. You aren't allowed any perfumes (apparently the eggs don't like them) or deodorant. Or hair products.
Upon arrival you're given a *lovely* gown and hair net. Also an IV. Eventually you move into the procedure room where you are spread out for all the world to see and eventually doped up before the Big Needle arrives.
They say the sedation can cause amnesia. I remember everything. Especially the part where my left ovary wouldn't cooperate and things got *painful*. It hurt enough that I had to ask him to stop and give me a minute.
Finally it's over and you go into the Recovery Room. I was recovered before we even got to the room. Seriously, it was insane. I was ready to jump up and get on with my day but I had to lie there anyways (I'm pretty sure the nurse was a little stunned by it). Eventually DivaDaddy went off to work and I waited out the rest of my imprisonment. About 15 minutes after he left I was allowed (with the nurse hovering) to go to the bathroom. Then I got a few instructions and some more meds and off I went.
(I should mention that when I informed everyone that I would be walking the three blocks to the Church *nobody* was thrilled about it. I was totally fine though. In the end Sultry was waiting downstairs for me and I walked with her. I think Mom drove us home, that's the only thing I'm not clear on.)
Once I got home and the nerves wore off I was a little sore and pretty tired. I crashed out for the rest of the afternoon and took it pretty easy the next day. All in all not as awful as I'd feared but not a picnic either.
Embryos!
The day after the egg collection they call to tell you how many fertilized (only 4/6 -- boo!). Then they tell you they'll call the next day to let you know how good the embryos are and schedule an appointment for the transfer.
That second day, in my case, was my BIRTHDAY. I spent it practically sitting on top of the phone. The clinic didn't call. That night we went out for drinks. Also crepes. And it was Daylight Savings so it was a very late night. When the phone rang at 10:30 I was not even remotely awake but our phone doesn't merely ring -- it actually *announces* who's calling. It was the clinic so I BOUNDED out of bed expecting the embryo report. Instead we have the following conversation:
Me (groggily): Hello?
Doc: Hi! Are you running late?
Me: Huh?
Doc: Are you running late? You're supposed to be here by now!
Me: Uh... why?
Doc: For the embryo transfer!
Me: Nobody called me!!!
Doc: What do you mean nobody called you?
Me: I waited by the phone all of yesterday and nobody called me!
Doc: Ok, well I'd like to do it anyways. Get here as fast as you can!
Me: OK!
Doc: Oh, BTW -- don't empty your bladder. See you soon!
Me: ...
So I flew to get dressed and called a cab and *somehow* made it there in half an hour. *Really* unhappy to be unshowered and slightly hung over only to realize that, being the weekend, the door was locked and I couldn't remember how to get in. Luckily the call box was idiot-proof and he let me in. When I arrived at the office he apologized for the not calling.
The Transfer:
You may remember that my consolation prize for all of this poking and prodding was that I would be able to donate leftover embryos to someone I know who's having a worse time than I am. You may also remember the lack of an embryo report, the slight hangover and the late night. Therefore you can understand that it was *jolting* to find out that a) my embryos weren't the best quality ever 2) that there would be TWO implanted and not one as I'd been told ("Don't worry, I'm pretty sure they won't *both* take") and c) the last two embryos probably wouldn't make it to the next stage and therefore wouldn't be frozen ("But someone will call you").
This time it was the belly ultrasound and it HURT. It hurt so much I didn't feel the transfer at all -- it was over before I knew it. Luckily I have a picture. I even have a picture of the embryos themselves.
Once the transfer was done he scheduled my appointment for the blood test (12 days later!?!) and assured me someone would call about the leftover embryos. I teased him and asked if he was sure and he said he was. Yeah right.
I had to rest on the table for about ten minutes after the transfer before I could pee and get dressed. The I cabbed it home and spent the next two days mostly in bed.
Post Transfer:
No one called about the leftover embryos (bet you saw that coming). The first week seems to be going well. I have pills to take and a delightful cream to use every night. By now the embryo/s should be firmly attached. In a normal pregnancy I'd be able to do a pee test but in IVF the hormones take longer to build up (which is why I have to have the blood test). The medications I'm on to support the pregnancy mimic the normal symptoms so even though my boobs are big and sore it doesn't mean I'm actually pregnant.
Where that leaves our plucky Heroine:
I've said it before, I'll say it again -- the last week is the WORST week. Especially this time around. *Every* symptom can be either PMS, the meds or a pregnancy. For the last few hours I've had some pretty uncomfortable cramping (you may remember that happened in the summer as well) and I'm hoping this is a *good* thing. Everything I've read says that as long as it's just cramping and there isn't any heavy bleeding all's well. We'll see. In the meantime we're buying a week's worth of $store pregnancy tests.
M.