perso.
further reading from purple and rose [04 Feb 2003|05:22pm]
[ mood | busy ]
[ music | jackie's strength - tori amos ]
A Broken Toy
Forgotten by the growing child
Ignored and stuffed away
In some corner of his closet space
Its eyes permanently open wide
Staring at the nothingness
Denied the proper discharge
After the funeral of the adolescent's childhood
A Broken Toy
Forgotten and faded away
left behind to its dismay
replaced by keys for an automobile
yet, even with all the space the vehicle contained
the Broken Toy remained
In its oblivion
Black pearl eyes
open wide
staring at the door
from a small area of closet space
purple and the rose [04 Feb 2003|05:39pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | The Fall - the Nixons ]
I believe today I die
What a revelation
To believe the truth instead of lies
Commence the separation
So who are we to breathe and bleed
When others live in sorrow
Surrounded in blue bodies
Hung there on the gallows
Restless now we do proceed
In hopes to quickly spread our seed
Who is it that might forgive us?
Who is it that might dismiss us?
Questions that lack answers
Have left us cold and solemn
They feed upon us as a cancer
Growing, spreading, quite similar to pollen.
Beware.
[04 Feb 2003|05:52pm]
[ mood | anxious ]
[ music | strawberry gashes - jack off jill ]
Feel so much and it all goes to waste
What I wouldn't do for just one taste
Of the beautiful tumbling perfection that lies within
Who knows.. this is nothing but sin
I would bathe myself in your blood
And drown myself in your misery
The voices that sing from above
Would take a moment to pity me
But never
Would they
Offer a helping hand.
purple and rose [04 Feb 2003|06:04pm]
[ mood | cold ]
[ music | Eva Adore - Smashing Pumpkins ]
Furthermore I've written nothing
That could solve the problems of those suffering
If only I could embrace them
Rock them gently to sleep
Let their tears fall...
So many of them
Silent rain drops
That don't fall from Heaven
These are the lives
Of all those with burden
Will there be a way?
To promise you that
These demons are going back to Hell
That they will... no longer haunt you
Scrape you or insult your name
That they can only watch you
from so far below
That your life does no belong to suffering,
But suffering belongs to you.
she sings winter [04 Feb 2003|06:39pm]
.. wish i knew how to bring back that spark to life,
but i don't, and i know that very well. sitting here
in a sweatshirt and jeans that itch. she makes me sad,
but it's fine. we're all lost in everything and nothing at all.
lately, everything has been all too peaceful,
not that i don't appreciate it, but it's not
something i'm accustomed to, so it makes me wonder.
i feel like my heart should be crumbling like crackers,
but it's not, it's just like jello.
"hey jupiter"
dreams leave the panging [17 Jan 2003|05:15pm]
[ mood | crushed ]
[ music | Northern Lad - Tori Amos ]
dreams leave (bring) the panging
after one night's good sleep
returns Old Misery
and this saddened face
forgets its grace
and we're left with nothing
but glass shards in our hands
all pretending to be diamonds
in their great charade
and this light burns
far more than i would ask it to
and my blood boils
more than i want it to
all for the better though
someday, they say, "it'll be ok."
and oh how i try to
understand this without lying
to my own spirit of light
if only we could roam wild
following our hearts every whim
and these strawberries seem to be lacking
in their beauty that i once knew in myself
and ms. jupiter hangs there drying
recovering from the rain
what great pains are taken
... to make it all disappear.
-perso
[04 Dec 2002|09:23pm]
a downward spiral
a negative slope into nothingness
a failure to comprehend
indolence
inability to heal
a desire for suffering
a creature of habit
a substance for silence
a wish to depart
a need to leave
conversation would be good
[04 Dec 2002|09:31pm]
she's singing and i'm sulking
she's waiting and i'm disappointed
he's happy and it's good
he's needing and he'll receive it soon
she's confused but won't ask for help
she's refusing to confess
the list goes on
different people
different confessions
i can relate to Emerson
intuition.
[04 Dec 2002|09:37pm]
Wish you wouldn't go.
Wish you were always near.
Wish there were no barriers.
and we are what we are... [10 Nov 2002|08:50pm]
[ mood | complacent ]
[ music | the cure - apart. ]
this is something we cannot seem to escape,
something that we may or may not know very well,
something that we all are searching for,
something that seems soo far away,
something so simple, yet seemingly hopeless,
something so perfect, but utterly worthless,
something that no one is will to accept, but it is always
something that we know before death.
simplistic vocal communication [11 Oct 2002|05:08pm]
can i give you something,
just a small, little,
insignificant...
token...
of my unable affection.
must i continue in this ceaseless
abandon...
deserting your precious hands as they
reach...
out for me.
restrained by these infinite, plastic
chains...
all they will allow me to
do...
is brush my fingertips across your
own.
do you think you'll be able
to...
hold on?
2002-08-27 22:13:00
staring blankly
outside of reality
through the wall, practically.
2002-07-17 23:36:00
just losing my mind
i need some kind of sign now
to make things matter
need some type of help here
to stop the pitter-patter
of my own feet pacing back and forth
wondering the whole day long
about all i'm worth
still no answers have i found
but simply made this hole
even deeper in the ground
this is simple knowledge
simple poetry
nothing fancy.
2002-07-17 20:45:00
you've got a strange way of telling me things
still i would never ask that you tell me the truth
but i'd most certainly prefer it of you.
2002-07-02 12:13:00
eh?
i am drinking
life is tinkling
on her head
they are whispering
songs of misery
and we shall celebrate instead
these are stories
which cause much worry
will we find the time to glory
in our filth
and collected beauty
of past kings and queens.
2002-06-29 20:56:00
i don't know...
don't care too much anymore...
or perhaps it's that i care too much...