Eggbaby Meme

[esquimieux]

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Holiday | Generator Rex

[doc_holi]

Six rolled a 6! LOL! And just for laughs, it's "Six Minus Six" Six.

[sixthdeadliest]

[This made no sense whatsoever. Whoever thought this up should be killed mercilessly.]

[He fumbled with one of two robotic eggs, wondering how in the world he'd got stuck with this.]

[doc_holi]

[Knocking right before walking in with a clipboard. He didn't lock the door, so it's good, right?]

Hey, Six. I need to you to go look at so-

[...]

[HURRY, GET OUT THE DOOR. CASUALLY WALK AWAY. GO. DON'T LAUGH.]

[sixthdeadliest]

[He looks up at her with an open mix of desperation and panic.]

...Help me.

[The egg baby in his arms starts to sniffle.]

[doc_holi]

[SUPPRESSED SNICKER.]

[Okay, okay. Straight face. There you go.]

[Sloooooowly, turning to look at him again...]

What-... Where did they come from?

[sixthdeadliest]

I have no idea. Two of the grunts just handed these to me. Said I should be used to handling kids by now.

[They probably forgot that he doesn't remember any kid-wrangling.]

[doc_holi]

[What? And why did they just decide to-? Cruel joke or-?]

[Scratches the back of her head... So, what to do now...?]

[ARGH, DEFEATING SIGH. She walks on over to him.]

[sixthdeadliest]

[He relaxes somewhat. She's a woman. She has maternal instincts. She should be able to figure out what to do.]

[doc_holi]

[Think twice about that theory, Six.]

[She sits down on the bed beside him, putting the clipboard down and... looking at the thing.]

... What do we do with it?

[sixthdeadliest]

[Six stares at Holiday.]

I thought you'd know.

[He tenses as it starts to cry and the other one starts to sniffle.]

[doc_holi]

[Oh, no, okay, uh.]

[She picks up the other one, trying to rock it a little. Seeing where that'll get her.]

Hey. Don't cry, little robot... egg... thing. It's okay.

[sixthdeadliest]

[The egg in her arms is still sniffling, but at least it isn't in loud obnoxious tears like Six's is.]

[He tries to mimic what she's doing, hoping that it'll settle the thing down. It keeps on wailing.]

[doc_holi]

[DAMMIT. SHE'S NOT A MOTHER. WHAT THE HELL? WHY DID YOU DRAG HER INTO THIS, SIX?]

Shut up, little egg thing. It's alright. [Isn't she the best mother?]

[Looking over at yours now.] What do we do?

[sixthdeadliest]

I don't know.

[He winces as Holiday's egg wails.]

But what you just did doesn't seem right. [He holds the egg baby in his arms with one hand, gripping at one of his assaulted ears.]

[doc_holi]

[AH. NO. NOT THE INTENDED RESULT AT ALL.]

[Okay, okay. Simple psychiatry. You took that class, right? About ten or so years ago, but it's all like riding a bike anyway. You stay calm. The egg'll stay calm... RIGHT?]

[Okay, okay. Just... treat it likes a real kid. Shaped... like... an egg. Just smile to it. She starts calmly rocking it, whispering softly.]

Hey, it's okay. I'm sorry. Shhh. It's alright now... You're okay...

[Don't worry, Six. SHE'S ALL OVER THIS.]

[sixthdeadliest]

[That seems to be working. The egg baby's crying has gone back to sniffling.]

[Now if Six can just get the ringing in his ears to stop long enough to be able to mimic her with the one held in one arm, everything will be all right. Hopefully.]