Cockblock Meme
Ain't no one gettin' laid tonight!
Since certain people have been complaining about how everything's always about the smut... have a meme where no fucking will occur! This is so not about sex! Except it totally still is.
How it works:
- Reply with character name, fandom, preferences, etc.
- The person replying to you will set the scene. Things are hot and heavy, clothes are being removed, etc., etc.
- The next reply is when you roll for a reason why things go south. Like... south south. Not below the belt. There will be no happy funtimes below the belt!
Alternatively, come up with your own reason why things go all to hell. There's plenty of options left unmentioned. But if you're pinning it on the other person, make sure the mun is OK with what you're saying about their character. This also goes if you roll the number II category. Crack =/= disrespect.
I. External reasons.
- The phone rings. Could be important! Better pick it up. Sadly, your bed partner does not appreciate the urgency. Or maybe they're the ones insisting on picking it up, and you get ticked off.
- The fire alarm goes off. It's probably a drill or something, right? Right? So what's that smoke suddenly appearing in your room for?
- Blackout. Complete fricking blackout. Romantic? Well, at least one of you is worried enough to want to find out the reason.
II. You what now?!
- What is that smell? Was the other person rude enough to stuff their face with garlic before meeting up with you? Did they cut the cheese?!
- Something physical. The other person has an ugly scar, a beer belly... maybe a third nipple? Whatever it is, it's completely putting you off.
- Similar to the previous one, but this is everything not natural - more along the lines of personal adornment. Horrible underwear, a weird tattoo... Or it could be their roots are really obvious this close up.
III. It's not you, it's me.
- You need to go to the bathroom. No, seriously, you really, really need to go. Right now. Way to ruin the mood.
- You say the wrong name. Of course your partner's not happy about that!
- Personal Issues. If you're a man, maybe you can't get it up for some reason. Maybe you've drunk too much, and you're passing out. Maybe you're suddenly thinking about your favorite pet goldfish that died that very morning. (GOLDIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!)
MAY THE SCHWARTZ BE WITH YOU!