Your hair is PERFECT, as always. You give yourself a thumbs-up in the mirror and pick up the phone.
"In a world where the truth is hidden by lies," you say in your best Don LaFontaine voice, "Only one man can get to the bottom of things. And then laugh at the word 'bottom.' That man is: Shawn Spencer, Psychic Detective."
Unfortunately, all humor is lost on YOUR FATHER, HENRY. "Do you seriously answer the phone to clients like that? What is wrong with you?"
"No, Dad." You sigh. "I had a psychic vibe it was you. What do you want?"
"I have the day off and I'm repainting the house," he tells you. "Mind coming down and helping me?"
You're standing in front of the SANTA BARBARA BEACH. Does your office have a sweet location, or what?
To the WEST lies the BEACH. To the NORTH and SOUTH lie the beachfront, with various awesome places to eat. The city is to the EAST. Your MOTORCYCLE is in the parking lot... Oh yeah, you forgot you had that thing.
You abandon the motorcycle and make a mental note to get some practice in or something and probably a new helmet, because let's face it, you did look PRETTY DOPE riding it.
THE BEACH
The beach is ALSO PRETTY DOPE. It's a nice day: the sun is shining, birds are singing, seagulls are eating trash, and so on. You're perfectly happy with your AWESOME GIRLFRIEND, but that doesn't keep you from noticing that there are a number of TOTALLY CUTE GIRLS out today. Maybe you can bring GUS by later -- he needs to get some, man.
"No, I'm totally not lying. And there are chicks everywhere. You know how much the ladies like a free cone, man."
There's a long pause.
"Oh, and I forgot to tell you about the case we just got," you add, LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH. "The case of the... missing house painters. So we have to get on that. While we find you a girl."
"I don't need a girl, Shawn." But you can hear him PACKING UP. SCORE!
A little while later, GUS pulls up in THE BLUEBERRY. What do?
>answer phone in funny voice
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"In a world where the truth is hidden by lies," you say in your best Don LaFontaine voice, "Only one man can get to the bottom of things. And then laugh at the word 'bottom.' That man is: Shawn Spencer, Psychic Detective."
Unfortunately, all humor is lost on YOUR FATHER, HENRY. "Do you seriously answer the phone to clients like that? What is wrong with you?"
"No, Dad." You sigh. "I had a psychic vibe it was you. What do you want?"
"I have the day off and I'm repainting the house," he tells you. "Mind coming down and helping me?"
YIKES. What do you do?
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"I called you at the office, Shawn," Henry points out. You IGNORE HIM.
"See--- luck --- bye!" You HANG UP.
Well, that cares care of that. What do you want to do next?
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PSYCH OFFICE: OUTSIDE
You're standing in front of the SANTA BARBARA BEACH. Does your office have a sweet location, or what?
To the WEST lies the BEACH. To the NORTH and SOUTH lie the beachfront, with various awesome places to eat. The city is to the EAST. Your MOTORCYCLE is in the parking lot... Oh yeah, you forgot you had that thing.
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>where's the helmet?
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Do you still want to ride this thing? You're not totally sure you remember how.
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THE BEACH
The beach is ALSO PRETTY DOPE. It's a nice day: the sun is shining, birds are singing, seagulls are eating trash, and so on. You're perfectly happy with your AWESOME GIRLFRIEND, but that doesn't keep you from noticing that there are a number of TOTALLY CUTE GIRLS out today. Maybe you can bring GUS by later -- he needs to get some, man.
What do you want to do?
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>call Gus
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"Gus, you've got to get down here!" you say.
"Shawn, I'm working. I still have a real job," he says, DISGRUNTLED. Or possibly GRUNTLED.
"But it's... free cone day!"
Pause.
"If you're lying to me, I'll kill you," Gus warns.
Do you MAINTAIN THE LIE, TELL THE TRUTH, FIND ANOTHER LIE, or GIVE UP BECAUSE GUS HAS A LAME OTHER JOB?
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There's a long pause.
"Oh, and I forgot to tell you about the case we just got," you add, LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH. "The case of the... missing house painters. So we have to get on that. While we find you a girl."
"I don't need a girl, Shawn." But you can hear him PACKING UP. SCORE!
A little while later, GUS pulls up in THE BLUEBERRY. What do?
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>tell Gus to drive away because of.....ninjas!
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"What??" Gus asks as he PEELS OUT.
"No time to explain! There are ninjas involved!"
"What the hell, Shawn?" But he's already driving away, so. "Where are we going?"
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