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Spencer Reid | Criminal Minds cleithrophobic June 22 2011, 19:29:25 UTC
whosyour_rikku June 22 2011, 21:28:50 UTC
I feel I need to warn you, this question's gonna call for you to bear with me on the believable scale.

Here's the set up: You've got a lover who was just turned into an animal. A non-mammally animal, too, because it's not fair for you to choose, like, monkey or something. Anyway, there's only one way for you to restore 'em to their natural human self! You've got to sex 'em!

So, now the question! What animal would cause you the least trauma?

[Safe?]

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oh my god brb dying cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 09:13:51 UTC
[WHAT IS THIS QUESTION OH GOD SPENCER WILL JUST STARE AT YOU, RIKKU.]

I, uh-- I'm not even sure how it'd be possible for a mammal and a non-mammalian animal to mate.

[afhskdjsjf]

I... really don't think I can answer that.

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//twists my evil mustache whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 14:51:17 UTC
What happened to bending with me on the scale of obvious non-reality, dude?

Ok, ok, fine. You get turned into the same animal that she is. Now what animal sexy times do you choose?!

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THIS IS GIVING ME MENTAL IMAGES I'D RATHER NOT HAVE. cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 15:11:37 UTC
[Okay, that is almost an okay question. He can just... pick a random animal. One that doesn't violently rape its mate or gets killed afterwards.]

Um-- I'm thinking maybe birds?

... Peafowls?

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THEN MISSION SUCCESS! whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 15:56:24 UTC
[Huh, well that's a new one. She's never heard of a Peafowl before. She'll have to look in to that.]

Graceful, light, cool! So, now my next question! You gonna stay with your girl after this?

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s-sob /weeps cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 15:59:40 UTC
[Wait, wait, wait.]

That's-- I'm pretty sure it's my turn?

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Ok ok ok, here's a tasty lollipop for your troubles <3 whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 16:11:11 UTC
[Snap, foiled again. She could come up with some lame excuse to validate her right to a second question but, whatever, she came to play, didn't she?]

Alright, you got me there. And besides, I have another turn coming up anyway, right?

So slap a dare on me, boy!

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lollipops are not enough, I AM TRAUMATIZED. cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 17:20:19 UTC
Uh...

[He has to think for a while, because dares are hard to come up with, okay. And they're playing the innocent kind of truth and dare, here. At least he thought they were until a certain someone started asking questions about sex with animals.]

Recite the first twenty digits of pi?

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Tell me what I can do! whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 18:00:55 UTC
Um.

[Does pi... exist in Spira?]

That's not how you spell pie, you know.

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HOLD ME AS I CRY. that'll do it. cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 18:21:36 UTC
[Spencer could understand if she'd told him she didn't know all the first twenty digits, but... she doesn't know what pi is at all? He obviously doesn't know that she's from Spira. Or what Spira is, either, for that matter.]

Not pie-- pi is a mathematical constant whose value is the ratio of any circle's circumference to its diameter.

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I'll read you "Goodnight Moon", too, and make it all ok. whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 18:28:59 UTC
Oh! You mean be!

[Al Bhed translation for pi? Is this right? Am I allowed to do this?]

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... okay! IT'S A DEAL. you're forgiven~ <3 cleithrophobic June 23 2011, 18:37:39 UTC
I... don't think that word is used for pi anywhere.

[He is kind of confused now, Rikku.]

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Yay! //huggles whosyour_rikku June 23 2011, 18:41:39 UTC
Well. You don't think but you also don't know.

Cause I totally know what I'm talking about here.

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/cuddlessss cleithrophobic June 24 2011, 00:58:48 UTC
[She's not making any sense at all.]

Well-- are you going to recite the first twenty digits of, um. 'Be', then?

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<3 whosyour_rikku June 24 2011, 13:39:34 UTC
I could tell you, like, half o' that...

[Surely the Al Bhed must require some knowledge of this number, considering the sorts of mechanisms and machina they build? But to hell if Rikku remembers 20 digits. After a certain point the numbers just jumble themselves up in her brain and kind of float around until they make a monkey constellation or something in there.]

3.14159265... 35?

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