I stole this from bartendersgirl/zomg_its_nikkie... *hangs head* lol

[memyselfandi87]

Give me 1000 comments in this entry. Or whatever, really. YOU, in particular, don't have to supply the whole 1000, but a tiny contribution would be nice. Then let me know if you post this in your journal and I'll return the favor

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Lewis Black Quotes: Part 1

[bartendersgirl]

"IF you didnt watch it you didnt miss anything. About 20 minutes into it I had a fork and I was trying to puncher my ear drum. Just going SHUT UP!! SHUT UP!! YOU CAN BE THE PRESIDENT JUST SHUT UP!! He began his testiomny by saying to the prosecuters "Can you define for me what you mean by the word alone?" I thought this is going to be one long fucking day. He doesnt know what the word alone means. He has to know what the word alone means. If he doesnt then that means he thinks that the voices in his head are other people."

Re: Lewis Black Quotes: Part 2

[bartendersgirl]

"The only way duct tape is going to protect you in a chemical fuck attack is if you have enough to wrap yourself in it so you can suffocate before the chemicals kill you."

Re: Lewis Black Quotes: Part 3

[bartendersgirl]

"These guys believe that a 350 billion dollar tax cut will stimulate the economy, and they are full of shit. Because they don't know what stimulates the economy. The economy goes up, it goes down, it goes up, it goes down, it goes up, it goes down, nobody knows why the fuck it happens. And I know this because I took economics, and I'd explain it to yea'... but I flunked that course. Not my fault. They taught it at 8 o'clock in the morning. And there is absolute nothing that you can learn out of one bloodshot eye. After failing two tests, I grabbed my professor by the throat and asked him 'Why do you teach this shit at such an ungodly hour? What are you trying to do, keep it a secret?'"

Re: Lewis Black Quotes: Part 4

[bartendersgirl]

“It’s absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we’ve got rockets, we’ve got saran wrap - FIX IT!!!”