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[mercuryglass]

hey guys! today i took a left turn too fast on my bicycle and went asphalt-surfing with my left arm. when people waiting at the intersection rolled down their car windows and were like hey are you ok, i cracked jokes while i picked myself up and made sure all my limbs still worked. i rolled my bike home with the front wheel backwards (it got all

Comments

[captain_swing]

Also, tampons are excellent for treating bullet wounds.