To Love and Commit [Merlin/Arthur - 5970 - NC-17]

Nov 15, 2015 14:00

Title: To Love and Commit
Author/Artist: leanb / borqui_l
Prompt: Uther and Balinor arrange a marriage between Crown Prince Arthur and Crown Prince Merlin. The two have been running in the same circles for years and they've never got on so their marriage gets off to a rocky start. They're physically attracted to one another and end up sleeping together after a drunken celebration. Arthur gets pregnant and over the course of the pregnancy they fall in love.
Pairing(s): Arthur/Merlin
Word Count/Art Medium: 5970
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer:Merlin characters are the property of Shine and BBC. No profit is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: thank you to val_creative for being my beta <3
Summary: If it was a true fairy tale, one of the princes would wait behind the doors, and when the music started playing they would open, and the two of them would lock eyes from opposite ends of the room and realize that all they had needed from life was each other. However, both Arthur and Merlin knew that this wouldn’t be the case.

Read it on AO3



Blue was a very unreliable color. It was the color of the sky on days Merlin was able to lose himself in the forest, it was the color of the water that he splashed in when he was a kid, playing with Will, it was the color of the butterflies he would create to entertain the children of the kingdom. However, blue was also the color of sadness. It was the color of the ribbon wrapped around the signed agreement, the one that meant he was leaving Essetir. To get married in a wonderful, grand, fairytale wedding. To Arthur Pendragon.

Arthur was red. Not just in the literal sense, in that almost everything he owned was the color, (except for that one white shirt that Merlin definitely did not want to talk about), but in all senses. He was a quick tempered, overbearing prat. Not, of course, that Merlin was an expert. They’ve known each other for years, these days it’s inevitable not to know every other member of a fellow royal family in any country remotely near your own. But they were not friends, anyone could tell you that. If you put the two of them in the same room, it’s guaranteed that within the hour, they would have started bickering about something (it was most certainly not sexual tension, no matter what Gwaine says).

But of course, even though Merlin tried to express these concerns to his father, he only got a vaguely amused look in response. Merlin collapsed back into the chair he had just burst out of moments before in outrage of the news.

“So this is what it’s like to be an engaged man,” Merlin sighed, massaging his temple.

“Technically, not engaged yet,” Balinor corrected gently, shifting papers around on his desk, “No one has proposed.”

Merlin looked up in confusion, “But this is an arranged marriage,” he pointed out, “There’s no choice involved.”

“Well,” Balinor coughed awkwardly, “The public doesn’t know it’s arranged. No one really does that these days.”

Merlin fixed his father with a pointed look. “Obviously.”

Balinor just rolled his eyes and continued, “We are attending the Summer Festival opening this weekend, as are the Pendragons. That leaves you approximately… four days to find a ring.” He put on his reading glasses and went back to checking the papers on his desk and occasionally typing on his computer.

Merlin groaned, but got up to leave without more protest. As he left his father’s office, he sent a quick text off to Freya. How much do you know about engagement rings?

*****

“Ah, Arthur,” Uther greeted with the usual formality, “Please, sit down.”

Arthur only raised his eyebrows, but complied. Usually when his father was being friendly, nothing good was to come of it. The last time he remembered this happening was when Uther had mistakenly sold Morgana’s cat, Agravaine, to the American president.

“As you are well aware, the past week has been spent in negotiations with Balinor Emrys of Essetir,” Uther began, “And we have seemed to reach a favorable agreement for both parties.”

Uther paused as Arthur simply nodded, his mind reeling. Agreements with Essetir were valuable. Though they were both well respected nations, the power of monarchy has been diminishing, and working together was the best way to ensure both of their safety.

“You will be wed to Prince Merlin Emrys,” Uther stated, leaning back in his chair, satisfied with the result.

“Excuse me?” Arthur burst out. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Merlin, he just… wasn’t his biggest fan. Naturally he was the only one who felt that way, the whole world was in love with the man, he somehow charmed everyone, though not literally.

“You are getting married,” Uther said simply, “Nothing has been set yet, but there is an estate close to the border that would be lovely for the ceremony.”

“This is the twenty-first century!” Arthur exclaimed, “How is an arranged marriage part of political negotiations?”

“It creates a bond closer than any treaty,” Uther explained, “Even if the only love that comes out of it is for your own country, together you will be stronger. An astrologist even stated that you are two sides of the same coin, or two halves of a whole, or something of a sort.”

Arthur just stared at his father, bewildered. “Since when do you consult an astrologist?”

Uther waved his hand dismissively, “Balinor’s advisor, Kilgharrah apparently also deals in astrology and can’t keep his readings to himself. But no matter. Merlin and his family will be at the opening of the Summer Festival and I expect you to look nice.”

Arthur stood and slowly walked out of his father’s office. As he made his way to the gym to work off his pent up energy, he sent a quick text to Morgana. Father stepped up his game to get us both married. He entered the weight room when his phone buzzed with a response. See you tonight, I’ll bring the beer.

As Arthur lifted, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to Merlin. He was nice enough, Arthur supposed, on a good day. It’s not as though they were arch enemies, they just preferred not to be around each other. They managed when it was absolutely necessary, which seemed to be more often than either would like because of their overlapping circle of friends. His best friend Gwen was dating Lancelot, and his friend Percy had some kind of undefined relationship with Merlin’s friend Gwaine, so spending time together was inevitable. But he didn’t know if he was ready to get married, let alone to someone he wasn’t in love with. As much as he would deny it, Arthur always dreamed of the perfect wedding, seeing the love in the eyes of the man or woman he would be spending the rest of his life with. It could never be a reality now, but he could still make the best of it. He was suddenly pulled back into reality by a sharp pain in his foot and Leon yelling at him about not dropping the weights.

*****

Kites flew high above the tent tops and the air was filled with the shouts and laughter of children and adults alike. The whole green was covered in an array of colors and strains of music attempted to reach through the chaos of the festival. Arthur’s feet pounded on the ground as he made his way toward the goal. Even though the opening of Summer Festival was a time for him to be a prince, he played football every year without fail. His father never protested because it gave their family good press for doing something “normal”. With a swift kick, the ball flew past the goalies arms and into the goal. Cheering, Arthur ran back to his team to celebrate. As he looked over to the small crowd that gathered, he noticed Merlin standing next to Gwen, with a slight smile on his face. Merlin was wearing a fitted, buttoned purple shirt, untucked from his jeans, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He really had no excuse to look like that, Arthur thought, startling himself, and then threw himself back into the game as if it could cleanse his mind.

“Do you really think it would be a good idea?” Merlin asked nervously, the ring box feeling too obviously present in his pocket.

“It would be perfect,” Gwen replied, rubbing Merlin’s arm in reassurance, “Are you nervous or something? Since you found your Prince Charming?”

“I didn’t find him, it was more like he was pushed into me,” Merlin grumbled, “And if anyone’s Prince Charming in this relationship, it’s me.”

Gwen just laughed in response. “And even if it is arranged,” Merlin continued, “It’s still a big milestone. And I can still embarrass myself in front of everyone with my clumsiness, even without a fear of rejection.”

Gwen looked at him fondly. “Go,” she urged, “The world is waiting.”

She gave Merlin a slight shove forward, and as he walked toward the pitch, he looked back to stick his tongue out at her, but she only laughed. Focusing on his task, Merlin made his way toward Arthur, running his hand through his hair nervously.

“Hey Pendragon!” Merlin called out, “Nice goal you had there.”

Arthur looked over and walked closer to Merlin. “Thanks,” he replied simply, “Didn’t know you like football much.”

“It has its moments,” Merlin said, “Mind if I join in?”

Arthur’s eyes widened in surprise, Merlin never played any of the games, preferring to do art projects or read to the kids. “Of course,” he recovered smoothly, “You, er, do know how to play, right?”

Merlin rolled his eyes. “I’m not a complete idiot.”

Arthur just bit his lip and nodded. Soon enough, play resumed. Arthur always made sure to keep Merlin in the corner of his eye. He did look extremely confused, but he wasn’t bad. Sure, he was inexperienced, but he could figure out where to pass the ball so someone who was better could make a play. When Arthur decided that Merlin didn’t need constant surveillance was when Merlin fell. Something must have twisted when he tried to take the ball from Valiant, and Merlin toppled to the ground, lying on his back. Without a second thought, Arthur rushed over to Merlin.

“Are you alright? Did you twist your ankle?” Arthur asked, worried as he dropped down to his knees next to Merlin.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m alright,” Merlin replied, before rolling over and hoisting himself onto one knee, “But I’d be better if you married me,” And in a fluid movement he took the ring box out of his pocket and opened it.

Around them everyone gasped, and it was as if time had stopped. The ring was simple, a gold band with alternating blue and red stones, and in the center, a gold dragon with a red eye. Arthur couldn’t help but admire the care that had gone into his engagement ring, especially with so little time.

“Of course!” Arthur exclaimed, and pulled Merlin close in a hug.

Everyone in the crowd cheered, clapped, and talked excitedly. The two princes were obviously a good match, and who knew they were dating? They must really love each other to take such care that their relationship remained private. The two men got up on their feet and seemed to be exchanging loving words only for them to hear.

“Thank you,” Arthur said, smiling, “For doing this. For the ring. Just for…”

“Making this as normal as possible?” Merlin interrupted.

“Yeah,” Arthur replied, “I know this isn’t ideal, but we can make it work.”

Merlin nodded and opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off by a cheer from the crowd.

“Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss,” they chanted, getting progressively louder.

Merlin and Arthur looked at each other wide eyed. Both of them had forgotten that the majority of people didn’t know this was an arranged marriage. Arthur peered at Merlin with questioning eyes, and only got a slight shrug in response. Hoping that he read Merlin’s signals correctly, he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him close. Without waiting any longer in hopes it could be slightly less awkward, Arthur leaned in and planted his lips against Merlin. His eyes closed instinctively, and a rush of relief ran through his body when he felt Merlin kiss him back. Merlin’s lips were softer than he expected, and he couldn’t help but lick them, deepening the kiss. Merlin’s hands were around the back of his neck, pushing the ends of his hair up slightly. He was running his free hand over his shoulder when a wolf whistle brought him back to reality. They pulled away and was pleased to see Merlin’s slightly pleased and confused face mirror his own.

“Congratulations to our two princes!” called a voice from the crowd, and another cheer erupted as Merlin and Arthur waved, Arthur’s hand still around Merlin’s waist.

Together, the two of them walked through the crowd, making their way to a private tent. They stayed close, the arms around each other, smiling cheesily for the people, who had no doubts about the legitimacy of the relationship. When they got inside however, they dropped their arms and separated quickly.

“I vote we put the mothers in charge of planning,” Merlin finally said after a lengthy silence between them.

“Seconded,” Arthur sighed, running his hand through his hair. “So, what happens now?”

Merlin just shrugged. “We get married? That is the natural progression after engagement.”

“Thank you, Merlin, for your endless wisdom,” Arthur replied, rolling his eyes, “But I mean between now and the wedding. People assume we’re, you know, together.”

“Shit,” Merlin simply said, his eyes widening, “I forgot about that part.”
“You forgot?” Arthur asked indignantly, “You’re the one who bloody proposed!”

“Well excuse me for doing as my father asked,” Merlin huffed, “I don’t see you getting down on one knee.”

“Pendragons don’t kneel,” Arthur replied stiffly.

Merlin laughed, “I definitely saw you kneeling next to me when you thought I was injured,” he responded quickly.

“For your information,” Arthur started, but was interrupted by Hunith and Ygraine entering the tent.

“Lover’s tiff already?” Hunith asked warmly as she walked in.

“It can hardly be a lover’s tiff if we’re not lovers,” Merlin pointed out.

The two women laughed and shook their heads lightly. “Just give it a month,” Ygraine said.

“A month?” both Arthur and Merlin asked, surprised.

“That’s when your wedding date is,” Hunith explained patiently.

“But we’ve only just gotten engaged!” Arthur replied.

Ygraine waved her hand dismissively. “You underestimate the power of royal families getting married. Enjoy the rest of the day, you two!”

Merlin and Arthur just stared at each other wide-eyed, and when Arthur offered his hand, Merlin took it and they went out to face the world.

******

The next month passed quickly for the engaged couple, helped by the fact that they didn’t see each other much. They went out of course, on what could only be perceived as dates. The public now had expectations that they had to meet. So they held hands, went to dinner, kissed each other under the light of the moon, just as any other couple would. However, due to the quick timeline to their wedding, they had endless fittings, meetings and decisions. To take some pressure off each other, Merlin and Arthur split the decisions about food and decor. And of course, Arthur thought he got the worse end of the deal.

I’m sifting through different shades of red for the seat decorations. SEAT DECORATIONS. Arthur texted in the midst of a meeting with… someone.

I’m glad you’re finally getting an education on the different areas of the color wheel came the quick reply.

Why couldn’t you have done colors? You’re better at the whole… decorating thing. He complained.

Very specific. Merlin replied. I have to do the taste testing anyway, otherwise you’d get fat.

Arthur saw the message and let out a soft disgruntled noise. I’m not fat!

Not yet. Merlin quipped.

“Arthur are you even paying attention?” Ygraine’s teasing tone brought him back to reality.

“Of course,” Arthur said smoothly, tucking his phone back into his pocket.

“So alizarin crimson or american rose?” The colors person asked and Arthur just pointed to one of the color swatches in front of him. “Excellent choice, sir.”

*****

The wedding day arrived all too soon for either of their liking. Merlin fidgeted in front of the mirror, trying to fix his bowtie, but it was already on perfectly. He grumbled and pulled at it a little bit so it would lie slightly crooked. At least one thing in this entire wedding had to reflect some kind of imperfection. He wished he had his phone so he could text someone, especially Arthur. They still weren’t on the friendliest terms, but Arthur was the only one who really understood what he was going through. He tried talking to Gwaine about it earlier, but all Gwaine did was point out how attractive Arthur was and hey, as long as you’re in an arranged marriage, at least you have some eye candy. Needless to say, Merlin never talked to Gwaine about it again.

There was a soft knock at the door and Hunith entered. “They’re ready for you,” Merlin just nodded. “Are you ready?”

Merlin smiled sadly. “I have to be.”

Hunith just nodded and took Merlin’s hands. She hugged him close and kissed the side of his head, and together they exited the room.

Arthur, too, was waiting in a separate room to be called. He paced in front of the door endlessly, his mind running through all the possible ways he could get through the next, well, rest of his life. They would be married in name alone, that much was clear. Both of them were too dedicated to their people and kingdoms to let their personal problems get in the way. But he would have to learn to live with Merlin, a man who he can barely spend an hour with without arguing. At the very least, he found Merlin attractive, albeit in the most primitive way. It was sad to only have that to work with, but they would figure it out.

“You’re going to wear a hole in the floor,” Ygraine commented, leaning against the doorframe. Arthur just gave her a tightlipped smile in return. “They’re ready.”

If it was a true fairy tale, one of the princes would wait behind the doors, and when the music started playing they would open, and the two of them would lock eyes from opposite ends of the room and realize that all they had needed from life was each other. However, both Arthur and Merlin knew that this wouldn’t be the case. First of all, they were walking down the aisle together. Both of them arrived in front of the large oak doors at the same time.

“Your tie is crooked,” Arthur said simply, but Merlin made no move to correct it.

“Your fly is down,” Merlin replied, and smirked when Arthur hastily pulled it up.

The first strains of music filled the air, and Merlin offered his arm to Arthur, who just glared and took his hand, entwining their fingers.

“I’m not a girl,” he remarked.

Before Merlin could reply, however, the doors opened and the two men smiled and made their way down the aisle. The beaming faces of the guests made both of them wish that there was at least some part of all of this that was real, yet neither of them could find it. They knelt before the priest, who started with the ceremony joining the kingdoms, and rose for the wedding vows.

“I promise to protect you, to care for you, and above all else, love and commit myself to you,” Arthur vowed, sliding a golden band onto Merlin’s finger.

“And I promise to protect you, to care for you, and above all else, love and commit myself to you,” Merlin echoed, placing the identical band on Arthur’s finger.

“Now seal your vows with a kiss,” the priest concluded, and Arthur and Merlin stepped closer to each other.

Their lips met and their eyes slid closed, as if to pretend for a moment that they were marrying for love. However, a round of applause brought them back to the present, and they pulled apart. Merlin squeezed Arthur’s hands, who returned the gesture, and together they walked back up the aisle as husbands.

*****

That evening passed in a series of awkward events. During the reception, they had a brief argument about whose hand would be on top when they cut the cake, and then, in a typical couple fashion, tried to feed each other cake. Forks were going in places where they weren’t meant to be, and Arthur got cake on his nose while Merlin got icing in his ear. Thankfully, the guests seemed to find it very adorable and endearing, but they didn’t hear the snapping comments or see the great deal of kicking that was going on beneath the table. The dance involved angry hissing and trampling of feet, but by the end, both of them remained in one piece. They returned to their room for the evening looking forward to sleeping and ending this long day.

“There’s one bed,” Arthur said, stopping once he entered the room.

“Married couples tend to sleep in the same bed,” Merlin replied, rolling his eyes, “Why would we be any different, sweetheart?”

“Well, sugarplum, in case it has escaped your notice, this was arranged,” Arthur bit back.

“Surprisingly it hasn’t,” Merlin replied testily, “But nonetheless, we are married, and we will share a bed, otherwise people will talk.”

Annoyed that Merlin had a valid point, Arthur simply replied, “Right or left side?”

“Left, thank you,” Merlin said, and walked over to the other side to get ready for bed.

Both men took great care as to avoid interacting as much as possible, and when they got into bed, they lay as close as they could to their respective edge, backs facing each other.

Merlin was the first to wake up in the morning, finding himself facing Arthur. Arthur had also turned in his sleep, but they had still managed to keep a reasonable distance between them. The sun shone through the curtains, softly illuminating Arthur’s golden hair. He was beautiful when he slept, aided by the fact that he couldn’t pick a fight. For a moment, Merlin regretted taking this away from someone who loved Arthur, yet deep down he knew that if it wasn’t him who had married Arthur, it would have likely been some noble he had never met. Merlin sighed and got out of bed, dressed himself, and walked over to the table where breakfast was laid out. He had only been eating for a few minutes when he heard Arthur groan and get out of bed. Sleepily, Arthur walked over to the table, sat down, and began eating. It was only after a few moments when he looked up and saw Merlin.

“Why ‘r you dressed?” Arthur asked, chewing on a piece of bread.

“Didn’t realize it would be a problem,” Merlin replied coldly, “And swallow before talking, please and thank you.”

Arthur made a big show of swallowing his next bite before speaking again. “You realize we don’t have to do anything today,” he said simply.

“That doesn’t mean I’m going to do nothing,” Merlin said, getting up, “I’m going to go for a walk, meet our staff. Don’t feel obligated to join me.” And with that, Merlin left the room, leaving Arthur to eat the rest of his breakfast alone.

*****

The next few months passed similarly, mostly arguing in private, eating in tense silence. However to the public eye, they were the perfect newlywed couple. They always had their arms around each other, kissing each other frequently, and generally acting as if they were on cloud nine. That’s what they needed to do for their parents and their people, so they would do their best.

A neighboring kingdom had quickly realized that the bond between the Emrys and Pendragon kingdoms was real and strong, making them a formidable enemy in battle. They sent a lord to Arthur and Merlin to work out a treaty, ensuring that they would not face the combined forces in battle. As with all treaties, the negotiation process was long and hard, but the final result was a gain for both Merlin and Arthur. After the document was finally signed, Arthur and Merlin returned to their room.

“And here you go,” Arthur said, dramatically presenting Merlin with a bottle of champagne.

“I like how you think,” Merlin replied excitedly, opening the bottle and pouring out two glasses.

“Now that is a first,” Arthur replied cheekily, raising his glass to his husband, “I’ll drink to that.”

The two of them laughed, and that glass was followed by another. And then another. They continued drinking, laughing, and celebrating until they realized they had finished the bottle.

“You know,” Arthur slurred, “I was never really completely opposed to marrying you.”

“Oh, yeah?” Merlin giggled, “Me too. You’re not too bad underneath all the layers of prat.”

Like an onion,” Arthur replied and they both laughed uncontrollably, “You have to peel back the layers.”
“This isn’t Shrek,” Merlin replied, still giggling, but then got serious, “I’d like to though.”

Arthur and Merlin looked at each other intently. “Then why don’t you,” Arthur simply replied.

It was as if a dam had broken. Merlin and Arthur surged towards each other, their lips colliding violently and then the kiss softened. Merlin’s hands gripped Arthur’s hips, and Arthur’s were tangled in Merlin’s hair. Merlin leaned forward, deepening the kiss and Arthur moaned softly into his mouth. They continued kissing as Merlin walked Arthur over to the bed, only stopping to take their clothes off. As soon as they were, Merlin pushed Arthur on the bed and quickly climbed over him, kissing up his chest and running his hands down his thighs. Arthur’s hands ghosted over Merlin chest, reaching around to his butt, where they found their home and squeezed as Merlin sucked a bruise on Arthur’s neck.

Arthur moaned and whispered in Merlin’s ear, “I want you inside of me,”

“Yes, oh god, yes,” Merlin breathed back, “Lube, please say you have lube.”

Arthur pushed Merlin off of him and reached over into his bedside table, pulling out a bottle of lube. Merlin took it, and squirted some onto his hand. He leaned over Arthur once more, Arthur’s legs wrapping around Merlin’s hips and their lips meeting as Merlin’s first finger breached Arthur’s entrance. He worked his finger in and out, stretching Arthur as fast as possible without hurting him. Once Arthur was wriggling on three of Merlin’s fingers, Merlin pulled out, quickly slicked up his cock, and slowly thrust into Arthur.

Arthur’s eyes squeezed shut and he tried to focus on the feeling of Merlin’s lips on his neck and his hands slowly stroking his cock. Slowly, Merlin began finding his rhythm, pounding into Arthur faster and harder.

“Yes, oh god, Merlin,” Arthur moaned, fingers digging into Merlin’s back.

“You’re so perfect,” Merlin breathed, adjusting Arthur’s legs higher around his waist.

With each thrust, Merlin was hitting his prostate, and Arthur’s moans of pleasure filled the air. Arthur began pumping his cock, craving release. The only sounds that could be heard were the slapping of skin and the grunts and moans of pleasure. Arthur’s eyes screwed shut, and he came moaning Merlin’s name. Merlin came a few moments later, buried deep in Arthur, breathing out his name as if it was a prayer. He collapsed on top of Arthur and soon they both fell asleep.

*****

Merlin woke up that morning with a splitting headache. Groaning he was about to sit up when he realized that he was naked. And laying on top of Arthur. Who was also naked.

“Fuck,” Merlin swore, and Arthur stirred underneath him.

“Morning,” Arthur replied, his voice low with sleep and hangover.

“Listen, Arthur,” Merlin said, getting up as quick as he could, searching for a pair of boxers, “About last night,”

“We don’t need to talk about it,” Arthur replied grumpily, “But for what it’s worth, you were good.”

Merlin blushed, pulling on what seemed to be Arthur’s boxers, “I’ll grab some food and advil, we have a meeting at noon.”

The rest of the morning was thankfully fairly normal. Merlin and Arthur didn’t interact much before, so avoiding each other after their night together wasn’t much of a feat. If Merlin’s gaze was lingering on Arthur when he wasn’t looking, no one was any wiser. He was just as fit as he looked, and in all honesty, they fit well together physically. However, it was better this way. Especially since they were married, having a physical relationship without an emotional one was dangerous.

Arthur was grateful that Merlin didn’t treat him any different after that night. He enjoyed himself, and he knew that Merlin did too, but it was best if they stayed separate. However, about a month after their night together, he woke up throwing up. Merlin, being the dutiful husband, wanted to stay with him, but Arthur urged him to attend to duties. Arthur was more tired than usual, and not as hungry. A few days in, Merlin’s worried looks were getting more and more obvious. By the fifth day of throwing up, Merlin insisted that he take him to see Gaius, their physician. Though he tried his best to hide it, he was thankful for Merlin’s support and was glad he would be with him.

Merlin sat in a chair off to the side, his leg bouncing up and down, asking if Arthur would be okay every few minutes. Arthur kept telling him to shut up, he would be fine, but Merlin could tell Arthur was nervous as well. Gaius seemed bewildered as he studied results from the various tests he ran.

“Well, Arthur, the good news is that you’re not dying,” Gaius said, then closed his laptop to face the couple, “You are, however, pregnant.”

“I’m sorry?” Arthur asked, shocked.

“You’re about five weeks along,” Gaius said, “And due to the nature of Merlin’s family line, he has the ability to impregnate a male partner.”

Merlin leaned forward, rubbing his hands over his face. Arthur leaned back on his hands, trying to process the new information. They were both drunk that night, they probably had forgotten about protection.

“Thank you, Gaius,” Arthur said finally, at a loss of what else to say.

“I’ll print out a sheet of instructions for you both,” Gaius said, and left the room.

Both Merlin and Arthur sat in silence for a few moments before Merlin spoke up. “I’m so sorry. I should have known, I should have paid more attention…”

“It’s not your fault,” Arthur interrupted, “Neither of us were at our best that night.”

Gaius came back, gave them strict instructions on how to keep Arthur and the baby safe, and shooed them from his office.

*****

The next month was difficult for both of them. Merlin made sure to be near Arthur at all times, keeping strictly to Gaius’ instructions. He didn’t want to make this any harder for Arthur. No matter what Arthur said, he felt responsible for putting Arthur in this condition. And Arthur was so brave, so beautiful. He could see that he wasn’t totally comfortable with the idea of carrying a child, but Merlin promised himself he would do everything in his power to make sure Arthur and their baby was happy.

Arthur was taking his time getting used to the idea of being pregnant. After the announcement, it all seemed like a bad dream, as if he was walking in a weird alternate reality. But when they told their parents about the pregnancy, it all came crashing into reality. Ygraine had walked with him through the gardens, reassuring him that he would be okay, and told him what to expect. As she talked about the joys of being pregnant, Arthur couldn’t help but wonder how different things would be if only he was in love with Merlin.

Since they were going to be parents, Arthur and Merlin took some extra time to get to know each other. Mostly it was during stolen moments, shared meals. They couldn’t tell the other’s life story, but it was a start.

Merlin couldn’t help but realize how wrong his first impression of Arthur had been. He was kind and caring, but it was because of that he hid beneath his prattish front. Even if Arthur didn’t feel the same, he fell in love a little bit each day.

Arthur couldn’t stop watching Merlin during their meeting. He was beautiful, in every sense of the word. How could he miss something like that in the person he was supposed to know best? He didn’t have any reservations about the pregnancy, he knew with a man like Merlin as the father, something would go right.

They began to sleep together. The just did that, sleep, but they really shared. More often than not, they woke up in each other's arms, and if they didn't, they were both in a foul mood for the rest of the morning.

One day, the two of them decided to go on a picnic in a nearby meadow, and get away from the monotony of palace life.

“Did you ever imagine this is what your life would be?” Arthur asked suddenly.

“In a way,” Merlin replied softly, “I always knew I would be married to another man, and that I would be expected to have a child. But I imagined it would happen differently, with the man I loved with all my heart.” He looked at Arthur with a strange look in his eye, “But I like what I have. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

Arthur smiled back, “Me neither,” He paused suddenly. “What do you wish to be different?”
“I wish this would have been a conscious choice, not a result of a drunken fuck,” Merlin said seriously, “But if you’re okay, I’m okay. Are you?”

“Yeah,” Arthur replied, and then laughed softly.

“What?” Merlin asked, surprised.

“I’m happy it was you,” Arthur confessed, “You’re so good to me, I don’t know how I didn’t see it earlier.”

“And with you,” Merlin said, and looked up at Arthur with hope in his eyes. “Can I kiss you?”

In response, Arthur ran his hand through Merlin’s dark hair, pulling him closer and kissing him. His eyes slid closed, and Merlin made a small pleased noise in the back of his throat, deepening the kiss. They pulled apart slowly, leaning their foreheads together.

“I think we’re doing this backwards,” Arthur commented, and Merlin laughed breathily, and pulled him close again.

This time, the kiss was filled with promises for a beautiful future.

~El fin~

Four Years Later

Arthur watched his husband dance around with their four year old son, Daniel. After the kiss in the meadow, everything seemed to fall into place for the two of them. And now they loved each other like nothing else, except for their son of course. Everyday, he falls more and more in love with that crazy man, and watching him be a fantastic father solidified Arthur’s decision. He couldn't wait to get back to their rooms that evening.

After they put Daniel to bed, they returned to their room, arm in arm as usual. When they got in, Arthur watched Merlin shuffle around and he knew it was the right choice.

“Hey love?” Arthur asked, walking up to Merlin and taking his hands, “I have an idea.”

“That's dangerous,” Merlin joked.

“I want to have another kid,” Arthur stated, and looked up hopefully.

“Are you sure you want this?” Merlin asked, his hands moving to rest on Arthur’s hips.

Arthur smiled sweetly and pecked his husband’s lips. “Yes. Daniel was the best thing to ever happen to us. Let's have a second, properly this time.”

Merlin beamed and pulled Arthur closer, wrapping his arms around his torso and leaning their heads together, noses touching. “I hope it's a girl this time.”

“Only one way to have a chance,” Arthur commented cheekily, pulling Merlin’s shirt over his head, taking his own off after.

Merlin laughed and kissed down Arthur's neck, walking them back to the bed. Their movements were so familiar now, four years later. They loved every part of each other, and fit as though they were meant to be. As Merlin entered Arthur, they felt home, they felt love. And they couldn't imagine it any other way.

fic, rating: nc-17, [fest: 2015], pairing: merlin/arthur, length: 1k+, !pregnant arthur

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