Soy un perdidor.

[merlinnimue]

You're Pitiful by Weird Al Yankovic
(to the tune of You're Beautiful by James Blunt)
---------------------------------
My life is brilliant...
What? Was I too early?
I'm sorry. Should I...
Do you wanna start over? Keep going?
Ok, ok. Now? Now?

My life is brilliant;
your life's a joke.
You're just pathetic.
You're always broke.

Your homemade Star Trek uniform
really ain't impressing me.
You're suffering from delusions of
adequacy.

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful,
it's true!

Never had a date
that you couldn't inflate,
and you smell repulsive, too.
What a bummer being you.

Well, you just can't dance,
and forget romance.
Everyone you know still calls you
"farty pants."

But you'll always
have a job -- well, I mean,
as long as you still can work
that Slurpee machine.

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful,
it's true!

You're half undressed,
eating chips off your chest,
while you're playing Halo 2;
no one's classier than you.

La-lala, la...
La-lala, la...
La-lala, la,
Loser...

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful,
it's true!

Your dog would much rather
play fetch by itself.
You still live with your mom and you're 42!

Guess you'll never grow a clue...
Well, it just sucks to be you.

What do you do when you wake up one morning and find that you've become the worst version of yourself imaginable?