(Untitled)

[meus_ovatio]

I have a strange and persistent ability to get closer to males through initial conflict. I am a little brother, so it makes sense. The one guy I yelled at and lost patience with is now pretty cool with me, and I'm pretty cool with him. It's happened before, this weird sort of inter-personal tension that is alleviated by hostility... sort of, clears

Comments

[pastorlenny]

So you want me to treat you bad?

[meus_ovatio]

Oh so bad.

[pastorlenny]

Mmmmm, baby.

[mijopo]

I understand what you mean. I've had relatively serious fallings out with a few of my closest friends. I attribute it to the fact that (a) people that I like and or/am comfortable with end up being in situations in which I'd feel free to be honest or direct enough to do/say things that might cause a falling out and vice-versa. (just as your family may sometimes see you at your worst) and (b) there's something about addressing and overcoming a conflict that can make people become closer, if only because you've valued the relationship enough to go to the trouble of addressing and overcoming the conflict.

[dzlk]

I think it's that I just can't completely trust any relationship that hasn't been put to at least one serious test. With the people I trust most there's always been at least one serious conflict that ended with me admitting I was in the wrong, making an effort to put it right and having that effort acknowledged and at least one serious conflict that ended with them admitting they were in the wrong and my acknowleding their effort to put it right. So if any new conflict comes up I can approach it with a feeling of "Oh, we've been here before and got through it alright" and relax a little. So it makes sense that friendship would come out of conflict because you establish some of that trust right off the bat