You rock because you are cool and then you are my tattoo artist...But while addressing gender you mention LGB and T. LGB are really about WHO you are banging. Too many people feel they have to dress like they are gay or a lesbian when LGB are about WHOM you Fuck At night (or day). I had a great lesbian boss with short hair who HATED being called sir. (Bi doesn't really count because you are being singled out and labeled because of your gay or lesbian tendencies not your hetero ones) So we come to T. Its about who you are. If you are a girl with some five o'clock shadow or a boy with 38D's and a goatie and no bulging crotch you are still judged by (from what I have determined) on someone eventually fucking you. Why else would you holler "That's a man" or "Crossdressing dyke bitch" at someone minding their own business on the train or waiting for a bus?
I hate when people say dumb shit to me and make me want to sew their ass to their face... when I would never walk up and make someone even think about anything.
Re: LGB and TmezdeathheadJune 10 2011, 09:15:25 UTC
I totally respect and understand what you're saying. I think the only reason that it's easy to see it all lumped together is that there is a strength in community that some GLBT find, in that that support system isn't easily found elsewhere. I completely agree that it's not the same, (GLB vs T) and I recognize that the entire point of my post to was point out that we should refrain from putting these kinds of identifiers on individuals, since each are unique
( ... )
If you're wondering where this comes from, personally I think it all goes back to power relations. There was a time when men owned everything, women were legally something very close to a type of property, and people were supposed to end up in heterosexual marriages in which men were in control. That system of power relations was, publicly, what gender was about, and homosexuality threatened them, so it was seen as some sort of dysfunction of gender identity.
You can still see this in the attitudes of religious-traditionalist types concerning homosexuality; they'll argue that same-sex marriage makes no sense essentially because it's impossible to tell which person is in charge. They'll also identify super-butch male behavior with heterosexuality, and give all sorts of consequently unintentionally hilarious advice about how to keep your son from turning gay. (Take him down to the fire station and having him hang out with all the firemen!)
I love this. This is much more eloquent than points I've tried to make.
There are unfortunate residual side effects for most of us that have either given up religion, or at least chosen to step away from entirely traditional family value type situations. As much as I'd love to say that I'm above this, I know I'm guilty of prejudice when it frankly doesn't matter. It may not have to do with my own pet causes (gender, orientation, race) but I can be quick to judge about class, caste, and religion. I know that I shouldn't, but I still find myself doing it all the time. I have no right being mad at someone for driving by in a sports car, yet It's pretty easy to hate before thinking.
Anyway, I think we are probably all guilty of lumping people together. I hate that it's true, but it is.
Mez, I loved your post. I just assumed I'm perpetually confused and I'm not interested in clarifying anything. People don't usually ask me straight up, the times I was not assumed as straight female, I was either called lipstick lesbian and automatically assigned a partner (which, at that time turned out to be just a very good friend from college) or in some other occasions all I heard were rumors that came back to me at some point. I decided I would not confirm or deny.
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(Bi doesn't really count because you are being singled out and labeled because of your gay or lesbian tendencies not your hetero ones)
So we come to T. Its about who you are. If you are a girl with some five o'clock shadow or a boy with 38D's and a goatie and no bulging crotch you are still judged by (from what I have determined) on someone eventually fucking you. Why else would you holler "That's a man" or "Crossdressing dyke bitch" at someone minding their own business on the train or waiting for a bus?
I hate when people say dumb shit to me and make me want to sew their ass to their face... when I would never walk up and make someone even think about anything.
Loves ya,
Lexie
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You can still see this in the attitudes of religious-traditionalist types concerning homosexuality; they'll argue that same-sex marriage makes no sense essentially because it's impossible to tell which person is in charge. They'll also identify super-butch male behavior with heterosexuality, and give all sorts of consequently unintentionally hilarious advice about how to keep your son from turning gay. (Take him down to the fire station and having him hang out with all the firemen!)
Reply
There are unfortunate residual side effects for most of us that have either given up religion, or at least chosen to step away from entirely traditional family value type situations. As much as I'd love to say that I'm above this, I know I'm guilty of prejudice when it frankly doesn't matter. It may not have to do with my own pet causes (gender, orientation, race) but I can be quick to judge about class, caste, and religion. I know that I shouldn't, but I still find myself doing it all the time. I have no right being mad at someone for driving by in a sports car, yet It's pretty easy to hate before thinking.
Anyway, I think we are probably all guilty of lumping people together. I hate that it's true, but it is.
Reply
I just assumed I'm perpetually confused and I'm not interested in clarifying anything. People don't usually ask me straight up, the times I was not assumed as straight female, I was either called lipstick lesbian and automatically assigned a partner (which, at that time turned out to be just a very good friend from college) or in some other occasions all I heard were rumors that came back to me at some point. I decided I would not confirm or deny.
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