FMA BBC: Estvarya, Chapter Seven

[mfelizandy]

Title: Estvarya
Author: mfelizandyGenre: Drama. Written for the 2010-2011 FMA Big Bang Challenge

Comments

[bay115]

I enjoyed Roy and Scar's conversations in this chapter a lot, especially over the lions. And LOL over Scar thinking how the East and West men looked like when he was young.

The part in which Scar's brother is mentioned is very interesting. Even though it's shown that Scar's brother performed human transmutation (or something closely related to it) never occurred to me he could be at The Gate and sacrificing his arm and eyes to Scar. Very nice reference there.

The last part it seems indeed something going wrong at the other end and those possibilities Roy mentioned doesn't sound good. D: Looking forward to more of this story!

Scar's brother

[mfelizandy]

Scar's eponymous feature has bugged me for a long time, as has his alchemy. The scar is basically a change in his skin color, with very sharp and tidy edges. (Arakawa also consistently drew it a little asymmetrically. If memory serves the scar reaches further down his left cheek than the right. Not many people seem to notice that. But I digress.) There doesn't appear to be any loss of flexibility or roughening of the skin. Not sure whether he's lost any sensation in his face--that could be a little ficlet in itself. Not that I mind, of course, he wouldn't be nearly as appealing with a more realistic disfigurement. Not just his eyes but his eyelids appear to be perfectly healthy and functional, which just didn't wash with me.

On top of that is Scar-luv's alchemy. He was never formally trained, and he's carrying experimental fusion arrays on his arms. Scar's alchemy is also spectacularly flexible and almost instinctive. He can transmute almost anything he lays eyes on, and control the effect pretty well. He can do

[halighfataliter]

Damn, another author that will make me write shameless flattering feedback that will leave me sounding completely smitten... But I guess it can't be helped because this was incredibly well written. The plot is very consistent, the balance of emotions is just right (and by that I mean that you do hurt Roy but not exceedingly so, the angst is there but not too much...), there is a bit a factual but that is nice and we don't lose interest. And finally the characterization is perfect. I really loved your look at Roy and Scar and the plot is very clever and originial. Really, it's near faultless! And I hope there is more coming ;-)

[kashicat]

This is so well done! I guess all those days and days of playing out these scenes have really paid off, eh? :-)

And I was so glad to see that Cennet is still around. I hope he gets to play as nice a role in this story as he did in ours.

Cennet will turn up again...

[mfelizandy]

I wasn't about to leave Cennet out of the story. He has more backstory now, among other things. But I'm not going to be specific, no spoilers, y'know!

[cairaguas]

“The people of Golden Xerxes are said to have been so tall that their hunched old women could see over the heads of men of my people.”

Hahahaha. Oh, poor Ed...

I'm enjoying the story. Keep writing!