Comments | mgansle: Who won this 'fight'?

mgansle

Who won this 'fight'?

Aug 02, 2007 06:52

Background
I have a friend from grad school who graduated and moved out to SF the same time as I did. In the beginning, we hung out a lot. He used to organize these Friday Happy Hours that I attended every Friday (because I was a good friend) and we also hung out once or twice a week as well. Then, two key things happen: 1) He started "uninviting" ( Read more... )

Comments 11

mrgansle August 2 2007, 14:10:29 UTC

I'm not sure I'd want to be friends with someone that full of themselves. I mean seriously, if they don't respond to your heartfelt attempts at reconciliation, are they actual friend-worthy?

Oh, and you are the weiner!

mattg August 2 2007, 14:28:47 UTC

IAWTC.

I would say that nobody "won" but he certainly lost.

mgansle August 2 2007, 20:23:14 UTC

I agree. I do feel like I withheld incredible constraint by not tearing him a new one and just not responding to his disparaging remarks.

thinktink August 2 2007, 15:00:29 UTC

Wow! You'd be fighting a no win situation with him. Obviously he doesn't understand that people have lives that sometimes overwhelm them and that being a good friend is being understanding of someone else's ups and downs. It always hurts when you think you really know someone and you realize you really didn't. :( ((hugs)) I'd get together with you anytime! :)

mgansle August 2 2007, 20:25:00 UTC

You said it well. and YAY thanks for my hug and affirmation. :)

rgansle August 2 2007, 16:43:49 UTC

I certainly understand you wanting to fight it and make them understand...I struggle with that a lot. I'm mostly a pretty non-confrontational person, but when I feel I'm being treated unfairly I get VERY much the opposite. That being said, as I'm not the one in the situation, it's easy for me to tell you that it's pointless and you can't change people. You can change yourself, but I don't think what you did is wrong in anyway. You were very justified in having a couple of months of not being super party friend.

mgansle August 2 2007, 20:24:08 UTC

thx. I agree. I can't change him or how he feels, so I am just not going to try.

archon August 2 2007, 19:06:58 UTC

nobody has won yet. what you need to do is start your own friday happy hour thing and steal all his friends away. then when he comes begging for forgiveness, tell him he can come to your happy hour. except tell him the wrong location. then you will have won.

mgansle August 2 2007, 20:22:25 UTC

sadly, I actually considered that already! Its that competitive spirit in me. :)

malaka August 3 2007, 00:51:02 UTC

I agree with Mark.

There are so many people that you DO want to be around, why waste your time with this joker?

I know he's your old friend, but people change. I've learned recently (due to my severe lack of free time) that I just don't have the patience for people who a) don't understand me and b) can't chill the hell out and wait until I'm in a place where I have time to hang out.