There'll be Peace
Title: There'll be Peace
Author: mgbutterfly
Rating: PG (there's some cussin')
Characters: Dean, Sam, Mary, John.
Pairings: none
Spoilers: Pilot (kind of)
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own these boys or their parents. If I did, things probably would have been different. Please don't sue... I have no money.
Summary: Dean remembers Sammy's six month birthday
Prompt: Written for spn_dailylife My prompt was Lunch.
Beta!Bitch: barkeep (because she is made of awesome.)
Author's Notes: This is not at all what I had planned on writing. There was gonna be porn. Alas, my porn muse has forsaken me. When I find the bitch, she will be punished.
You look over at your brother, fast asleep, propped up against the passenger side window. The car always did lull him into unconsciousness. Some of your first and best memories were created in this car; you wish Sam could remember those days. Days when you were a family. Days when Mary was still alive.
*
Mommy lifts you out of the buggy after putting the groceries into the trunk of the Impala. She's humming something pretty, and she looks so happy. You reach out and touch her cheek and she gives you that warm Mommy smile that holds all the comfort and all the safety that you know you'll ever need. She sits you down in your car seat and says, "Okay, buckle yourself in, little man. I'll check it in just a minute."
You start to buckle yourself in as she puts your baby brother into his car seat. He's making little cooing noises, and mommy is smiling and humming. The noises surround you in a cocoon of bliss. When you're securely in your seat you look over at Mommy and Sammy and you smile, "I'm done, Mommy. Will you sing louder?"
She finishes with Sammy and closes the door on the passenger side then comes over to your side. She checks your seat to make sure you did it right (you always do) and she gives you a big kiss on your cheek. She's started singing instead of the humming and you know some of the words. Daddy likes this song. You like it too.
Sammy is still cooing in his car seat and Mommy gets in on the pilot's side (that's what you and Daddy call it) and starts the engine up. You've always loved the purring engine and Daddy says that when you were just a baby and couldn't sleep, he and Mommy would drive you around in the car until you did. It usually didn't take long, he said, just around the block most of the time.
Mommy starts the drive home and pretty soon Sammy is asleep in his chair, he always falls asleep in the car, too. After a minute, Mommy looks at you in the rear view mirror, "You want to sing with me, Dean?" she asks, smiling at you. When Mommy smiles you'd do anything for her. Her smile is sunshine and cookies and warmth and happiness. You smile back at Mommy and start to sing with her.
"Once I rose above the noise and confusion, just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion, I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high..." Mommy always makes her voice match yours, and the music makes you feel like everything will always be like this. You and Sammy and Mommy and Daddy. Forever.
"Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done. Lay your weary head to rest, don't you cry no more...."
"Mommy? What's wayward mean?" you ask.
"When someone is wayward, it means that they're following their own way, doing things on their own terms, usually outside the lives of people they love. Sometimes it means they are unpredictable, you don't know what they're going to do next. Do you understand that, baby?" Mommy looks at you in the mirror again and you nod your head to let her know that you understand.
She smiles and starts singing again, and soon, you're pulling into the driveway.
*
The radio is playing that song, but instead of turning it up, you turn it down and lose yourself in the memories. Glancing every now and then to your sleeping brother, you think this is the sum and total of your entire life; this ghost-busting road trip, a crappy metaphor for your life. How does it manage to contain everything that's important to you and suck-ass all at once?
*
Sammy is in his playpen in the kitchen while Mommy makes sandwiches for lunch. You hear the front door open and Daddy's voice humming a tune from the entryway. It's the same one that you and Mommy were singing earlier. It makes you smile.
You hop down from where you are coloring at the table and run to meet Daddy. You wrap your arms around his legs and he lets out a surprised laugh, "Hey, little man. Did you get Sammy a present today?"
You giggle as he lifts you up into his arms and shake your head, "No, Daddy. Mommy said it would be nicer if I made something for Sammy. She said that when you make something with your own hands, it holds a little part of you and when you give it to someone, they have that little part and can keep it forever."
"Did she?" Daddy's carrying you into the kitchen and as he passes Sammy's playpen, he reaches down and gives him a little rub on the head. Sammy lets out an excited squeal and you have to cover your ears. Daddy walks over to Mommy with you still in his arms and pulls her into a one armed hug, "Hey, darlin'. Work was slow so I get to spend the day with my favorite lady and her two boys," Daddy inhales deeply and makes a grumbly noise in his throat, "Smells good. What's for lunch?"
Mommy smiles again; you don't think you've ever seen her smile so much. She's so beautiful, she's like an angel. And she says angels watch over you, so maybe she is an angel. She watches over you.
"Why don't you tell daddy what we did today, Dean," she says as she leans in to kiss your Daddy on the cheek.
"We went to the grocery store and Mommy bought cake and candles and cupcakes and she said that we could eat the cupcakes after lunch and that tonight we could have the cake but I could blow out the candles for Sammy because he doesn't know how yet. How come I don't get six month birthdays?"
You feel your Daddy laugh from way down in his belly. Mommy is laughing too, so you start to giggle. Daddy walks over to the table and puts you down in your chair and says, "Because, soldier, you're a big boy now. Big boys get one birthday a year. But when you were Sammy's age, we did this for you too."
You look over at Sammy in his playpen. He's so lucky. He'll get to have this birthday and another one on his real birthday. But you're happy. And Mommy and Daddy are happy. So that's all that matters.
Daddy walks over to Sammy and picks him up then walks back over to Mommy. You go back to your coloring and glance up every now and then to see the three of them dancing in slow circles in front of the sink. Daddy starts singing that same song from earlier, and Mommy joins in. From where you're coloring at the table, you quietly sing along with them.
Daddy comes over and puts Sammy in his highchair. He's got a bowl of something kinda tan and mushy to feed him. You're so glad you're not a baby anymore and don't have to eat things that look like that. Mommy walks over with three plates, but you can't tell what the sandwiches are yet. She sets Daddy's plate in front of him then yours in front of you.
"Yay! Grilled cheese! This is the best six month birthday ever. We get grilled cheese and cupcakes and cake. Can I give Sammy his present now?"
Mommy looks at Daddy who's feeding Sammy and trying to keep Sammy's flopping hands out of the mush. Sammy has some of the mush on his cheeks and hands and looks like he took a header into some oatmeal. You laugh when he reaches out and sticks his hand on Daddy's cheek and gets some of the mush on him. Daddy laughs too and says, "Sure, soldier. I'm sure he's very excited to see what it is."
You hold your picture up to Sammy, careful not to let his mush-covered hands touch it. He's wide-eyed and grinning in that toothless baby way that you think is so funny. You can't believe there was a time that you never had teeth. Sammy starts pumping his little arms up and down, fists balled tight, squealing with delight. You smile proudly and start to explain your gift, "This is me, and this is Mommy and Daddy, and this little thing right here, that's you, Sammy. We're all in front of the house and it's summer time and we're all happy."
Mommy and Daddy look at each other and smile. Sammy is still squealing and throwing his arms around, so you go put your gift to him on the fridge. You sit back down to eat your lunch with Mommy and Daddy and Sammy, and when you're done you get a cupcake.
That night, after dinner, you get to eat cake. Mommy brings it out to the table with on little candle on it. Sammy looks at the flame, wide-eyed; he looks scared. You touch your baby brother's arm and whisper, "It's okay, Sammy. I won't let it hurt you. I'm gonna blow it out right now."
Everybody's watching you. Mommy and Daddy are smiling but Sammy still looks like he might cry, and you look to Daddy for permission to put out the fire. Daddy nods, and pulls out the camera.
You close your eyes, make a wish, and blow out the candle.
*
When you pull off the highway into the parking lot of a little mom and pop diner, Sam wakes up. "Where are we?" he asks, his voice still a little rough from sleep.
"Somewhere outside of Kennesaw. It's lunchtime, you hungry?"
Sam rubs his eyes and nods. You watch as he unfurls himself and rolls out of the car. Following him into the diner, you slide into a booth opposite him and stare out the window for a minute.
"Hey, uh, why don't you drive for a while. I could use a nap after lunch," you say, careful to make your voice as neutral as possible.
Sam leans in over the table and folds his hands in front of him cocking his head to the side. Shit. How does he always know? Freaky psychic wonder boy.
"You okay, Dean? I mean, we usually just stop for gas station fare and move along. Why the diner today? And dude, we've only been driving a few hours. You're never ready to give up the wheel this soon." Sam leans back against the booth and opens his hands on the tabletop.
"I don't know. I was just craving a grilled cheese and figured I wouldn't be able to find one in a gas station in Podunk, Georgia. And even the Great Dean Winchester needs a nap every now and again. Dude, you're not the only one who can fall asleep in that car." And thank god the waitress is standing in front of you now asking, 'What'll y'all have?'
You order your grilled cheese, and apparently Sam thinks that sounds pretty damned good because he does the same. He's sipping his Coke, which is really a Sprite, but everything is Coke down here, humming something under his breath.
"Dude, cut it out."
Sam gives you that what-the-fuck-crawled-up-your-ass-and-died look and just starts humming louder. You roll your eyes and try to ignore how he's humming off-key on purpose. Sam can carry a tune. He's just doing this to piss you off.
You pick up your Coke, which is really a Dr. Pepper, and lean back. You're staring at Sam, just watching him pick at the straw wrapper, humming that same song. The same god damn song.
And you find yourself humming along with him.
Author: mgbutterfly
Rating: PG (there's some cussin')
Characters: Dean, Sam, Mary, John.
Pairings: none
Spoilers: Pilot (kind of)
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own these boys or their parents. If I did, things probably would have been different. Please don't sue... I have no money.
Summary: Dean remembers Sammy's six month birthday
Prompt: Written for spn_dailylife My prompt was Lunch.
Beta!Bitch: barkeep (because she is made of awesome.)
Author's Notes: This is not at all what I had planned on writing. There was gonna be porn. Alas, my porn muse has forsaken me. When I find the bitch, she will be punished.
You look over at your brother, fast asleep, propped up against the passenger side window. The car always did lull him into unconsciousness. Some of your first and best memories were created in this car; you wish Sam could remember those days. Days when you were a family. Days when Mary was still alive.
*
Mommy lifts you out of the buggy after putting the groceries into the trunk of the Impala. She's humming something pretty, and she looks so happy. You reach out and touch her cheek and she gives you that warm Mommy smile that holds all the comfort and all the safety that you know you'll ever need. She sits you down in your car seat and says, "Okay, buckle yourself in, little man. I'll check it in just a minute."
You start to buckle yourself in as she puts your baby brother into his car seat. He's making little cooing noises, and mommy is smiling and humming. The noises surround you in a cocoon of bliss. When you're securely in your seat you look over at Mommy and Sammy and you smile, "I'm done, Mommy. Will you sing louder?"
She finishes with Sammy and closes the door on the passenger side then comes over to your side. She checks your seat to make sure you did it right (you always do) and she gives you a big kiss on your cheek. She's started singing instead of the humming and you know some of the words. Daddy likes this song. You like it too.
Sammy is still cooing in his car seat and Mommy gets in on the pilot's side (that's what you and Daddy call it) and starts the engine up. You've always loved the purring engine and Daddy says that when you were just a baby and couldn't sleep, he and Mommy would drive you around in the car until you did. It usually didn't take long, he said, just around the block most of the time.
Mommy starts the drive home and pretty soon Sammy is asleep in his chair, he always falls asleep in the car, too. After a minute, Mommy looks at you in the rear view mirror, "You want to sing with me, Dean?" she asks, smiling at you. When Mommy smiles you'd do anything for her. Her smile is sunshine and cookies and warmth and happiness. You smile back at Mommy and start to sing with her.
"Once I rose above the noise and confusion, just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion, I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high..." Mommy always makes her voice match yours, and the music makes you feel like everything will always be like this. You and Sammy and Mommy and Daddy. Forever.
"Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done. Lay your weary head to rest, don't you cry no more...."
"Mommy? What's wayward mean?" you ask.
"When someone is wayward, it means that they're following their own way, doing things on their own terms, usually outside the lives of people they love. Sometimes it means they are unpredictable, you don't know what they're going to do next. Do you understand that, baby?" Mommy looks at you in the mirror again and you nod your head to let her know that you understand.
She smiles and starts singing again, and soon, you're pulling into the driveway.
*
The radio is playing that song, but instead of turning it up, you turn it down and lose yourself in the memories. Glancing every now and then to your sleeping brother, you think this is the sum and total of your entire life; this ghost-busting road trip, a crappy metaphor for your life. How does it manage to contain everything that's important to you and suck-ass all at once?
*
Sammy is in his playpen in the kitchen while Mommy makes sandwiches for lunch. You hear the front door open and Daddy's voice humming a tune from the entryway. It's the same one that you and Mommy were singing earlier. It makes you smile.
You hop down from where you are coloring at the table and run to meet Daddy. You wrap your arms around his legs and he lets out a surprised laugh, "Hey, little man. Did you get Sammy a present today?"
You giggle as he lifts you up into his arms and shake your head, "No, Daddy. Mommy said it would be nicer if I made something for Sammy. She said that when you make something with your own hands, it holds a little part of you and when you give it to someone, they have that little part and can keep it forever."
"Did she?" Daddy's carrying you into the kitchen and as he passes Sammy's playpen, he reaches down and gives him a little rub on the head. Sammy lets out an excited squeal and you have to cover your ears. Daddy walks over to Mommy with you still in his arms and pulls her into a one armed hug, "Hey, darlin'. Work was slow so I get to spend the day with my favorite lady and her two boys," Daddy inhales deeply and makes a grumbly noise in his throat, "Smells good. What's for lunch?"
Mommy smiles again; you don't think you've ever seen her smile so much. She's so beautiful, she's like an angel. And she says angels watch over you, so maybe she is an angel. She watches over you.
"Why don't you tell daddy what we did today, Dean," she says as she leans in to kiss your Daddy on the cheek.
"We went to the grocery store and Mommy bought cake and candles and cupcakes and she said that we could eat the cupcakes after lunch and that tonight we could have the cake but I could blow out the candles for Sammy because he doesn't know how yet. How come I don't get six month birthdays?"
You feel your Daddy laugh from way down in his belly. Mommy is laughing too, so you start to giggle. Daddy walks over to the table and puts you down in your chair and says, "Because, soldier, you're a big boy now. Big boys get one birthday a year. But when you were Sammy's age, we did this for you too."
You look over at Sammy in his playpen. He's so lucky. He'll get to have this birthday and another one on his real birthday. But you're happy. And Mommy and Daddy are happy. So that's all that matters.
Daddy walks over to Sammy and picks him up then walks back over to Mommy. You go back to your coloring and glance up every now and then to see the three of them dancing in slow circles in front of the sink. Daddy starts singing that same song from earlier, and Mommy joins in. From where you're coloring at the table, you quietly sing along with them.
Daddy comes over and puts Sammy in his highchair. He's got a bowl of something kinda tan and mushy to feed him. You're so glad you're not a baby anymore and don't have to eat things that look like that. Mommy walks over with three plates, but you can't tell what the sandwiches are yet. She sets Daddy's plate in front of him then yours in front of you.
"Yay! Grilled cheese! This is the best six month birthday ever. We get grilled cheese and cupcakes and cake. Can I give Sammy his present now?"
Mommy looks at Daddy who's feeding Sammy and trying to keep Sammy's flopping hands out of the mush. Sammy has some of the mush on his cheeks and hands and looks like he took a header into some oatmeal. You laugh when he reaches out and sticks his hand on Daddy's cheek and gets some of the mush on him. Daddy laughs too and says, "Sure, soldier. I'm sure he's very excited to see what it is."
You hold your picture up to Sammy, careful not to let his mush-covered hands touch it. He's wide-eyed and grinning in that toothless baby way that you think is so funny. You can't believe there was a time that you never had teeth. Sammy starts pumping his little arms up and down, fists balled tight, squealing with delight. You smile proudly and start to explain your gift, "This is me, and this is Mommy and Daddy, and this little thing right here, that's you, Sammy. We're all in front of the house and it's summer time and we're all happy."
Mommy and Daddy look at each other and smile. Sammy is still squealing and throwing his arms around, so you go put your gift to him on the fridge. You sit back down to eat your lunch with Mommy and Daddy and Sammy, and when you're done you get a cupcake.
That night, after dinner, you get to eat cake. Mommy brings it out to the table with on little candle on it. Sammy looks at the flame, wide-eyed; he looks scared. You touch your baby brother's arm and whisper, "It's okay, Sammy. I won't let it hurt you. I'm gonna blow it out right now."
Everybody's watching you. Mommy and Daddy are smiling but Sammy still looks like he might cry, and you look to Daddy for permission to put out the fire. Daddy nods, and pulls out the camera.
You close your eyes, make a wish, and blow out the candle.
*
When you pull off the highway into the parking lot of a little mom and pop diner, Sam wakes up. "Where are we?" he asks, his voice still a little rough from sleep.
"Somewhere outside of Kennesaw. It's lunchtime, you hungry?"
Sam rubs his eyes and nods. You watch as he unfurls himself and rolls out of the car. Following him into the diner, you slide into a booth opposite him and stare out the window for a minute.
"Hey, uh, why don't you drive for a while. I could use a nap after lunch," you say, careful to make your voice as neutral as possible.
Sam leans in over the table and folds his hands in front of him cocking his head to the side. Shit. How does he always know? Freaky psychic wonder boy.
"You okay, Dean? I mean, we usually just stop for gas station fare and move along. Why the diner today? And dude, we've only been driving a few hours. You're never ready to give up the wheel this soon." Sam leans back against the booth and opens his hands on the tabletop.
"I don't know. I was just craving a grilled cheese and figured I wouldn't be able to find one in a gas station in Podunk, Georgia. And even the Great Dean Winchester needs a nap every now and again. Dude, you're not the only one who can fall asleep in that car." And thank god the waitress is standing in front of you now asking, 'What'll y'all have?'
You order your grilled cheese, and apparently Sam thinks that sounds pretty damned good because he does the same. He's sipping his Coke, which is really a Sprite, but everything is Coke down here, humming something under his breath.
"Dude, cut it out."
Sam gives you that what-the-fuck-crawled-up-your-ass-and-died look and just starts humming louder. You roll your eyes and try to ignore how he's humming off-key on purpose. Sam can carry a tune. He's just doing this to piss you off.
You pick up your Coke, which is really a Dr. Pepper, and lean back. You're staring at Sam, just watching him pick at the straw wrapper, humming that same song. The same god damn song.
And you find yourself humming along with him.