#aromanticspectrumawarenessweek rant 2 I call it “emotions”, Squishes friends and Fandom.
Day 2 #aromanticspectrumawarenessweek rant 2
Shorter than the last:
AS always there is a very good chance this is going to mean bugger all to anyone but me,. but I want to do it, so i'm doing it. so there :P
small facts blurb first
There is a widely held misconceptions that all Aromantic identifying people lack emotion, lack the ability to form social connections and are “loveless” in reality many Aros are capable of all these things. It varys just like they do.
A person who identifies as Aromantic is still capable of other types of attraction, such as recognizing when a person is good-looking ― Some Aromantics get platonic crushes or "squishes", also known as platonic attraction.
Aros are capable of feeling “love”- for example Aro’s feel platonic love such as that between close friends very strongly.
On the other hand, some Aromantics may not experience platonic love or attraction, and may identify as aplatonic. Others may not desire partners of any kind, and may identify as nonamorous.
Some Aromantics embrace the loveless label and reject the idea that love is necessary for happiness.
want to know more? ask or research yourself. ( for example https://www.healthline.com/health/aromantic )
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As regards me...
Emotions: As certain people will tell you I am not completely emotionless as much as I have wished to be, but I do not have the same emotional map as other people do.
I do my damndest not to show what little I do feel, and only those certain people have ever truly seen me with the walls down.
Its debatable whether that’s because i’m Aro or because I developed a way to cope with being used and bullied when I was in school and it just stuck, either works.
Squishes: I hate the term, but if its the only way to make people differentiate and stop assuming i’m faking and am really some sort of straight/bi letch (naming no names) .
I will happily stand here and say that my admiration and ‘love’ of characters and actors counts as ‘squishes’ even if the word makes me want to murder people when they say it in connection with me, its too... sappy, personally I prefer the more formal term of “platonic attraction.” Or “admiration based attraction.”
And yes I do consider my small inner pack to be my “platonic love” because I am fiercely protective of them, and I’d like to think they can read that in me under all walls and shields i hold up on a daily basis out in ‘the world’
If I count you as pack, understand that it is not just me using a term from a fandom, it means that you have done something, been through something with me that makes me admire you, and that it is ONLY ever going to be platonic no matter what is said in society.
Fandom: To Date I can't say there are any cannon characters in fandom that i can name who have openly come out as being Aromantic, but in the Shadowhunter chronicles (mainly The Mortal Instruments) Cassandra Clare wrote Vampire Raphael Santiago as Aromantic Asexual, and while this was watered slightly when the show was made and Raphael only came out as Asexual he remains my go to when asked.
Though as with most geeks I have several head cannons that I could wax lyrical about
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Platonic Love - is a type of love that is not sexual. It is named after Greek philosopher Plato,
"Platonic love" in its modern popular sense is an affectionate relationship into which the sexual element does not enter, especially in cases where one might easily assume otherwise."[ "Platonic lovers function to underscore a supportive role where the friend sees [their] duty as the provision of advice, encouragement, and comfort to the other person ... and do not entail exclusivity." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platonic_love)
Platonic attraction is a form of attraction that is defined as the desire to form a close platonic relationship (friendship) with a specific person, or to form a closer friendship with someone one already knows. The type of friendship desired can often go beyond casual friendship and revolves around a willingness to engage in a very deep symbiotic friendship, and sharing interests and experiences (https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Platonic_Attraction)