Late Night Instant Text Messaging
Sherlock Holmes 7:56 pm
Look at what you made me do.
John Watson 7:58 pm
You're an adult, I can hardly make you DO anything.
Sherlock Holmes 7:59 pm
Granted, I wasn't forced, but I would have been a disappointment had I declined the invitation.
Hence. You made me do this.
John Watson 8:01 pm
Well, then I'm not ashamed. You really should learn to resist these tempations.
Sherlock Holmes 8:02 pm
It's a weakness, it really is.
John Watson 8:03 pm
That and me, of course. Your weaknesses, I mean.
Ah, good - now my icon is there now.
Sherlock Holmes 8:04 pm
I haven't used an online instant messaging system since Uni. This is quite nostalgic.
John Watson 8:05 pm
You're welcome.
I've never really been technologically savvy.
Sherlock Holmes 8:06 pm
Apparently.
It's quite simple really.
All it is is pushing buttons.
John Watson 8:07 pm
I see your "sense of humor" is in fine form this evening.
Sherlock Holmes 8:08 pm
Anderson.
John Watson 8:08 pm
Comparing me to Anderson? That's nice.
Sherlock Holmes 8:09 pm
No. I had to work with Anderson earlier today while you were at the clinic.
It was dreadful.
John Watson 8:09 pm
Poor thing. Want me to beat him up after school?
Sherlock Holmes 8:10 pm
Would you?
John Watson 8:10 pm
No.
Sherlock Holmes 8:11 pm
Then why even offer ?
John Watson 8:11 pm
I was having a laugh at your expense. Although if Sally calls you a 'freak' one more time, I might be likely to hit her.
Sherlock Holmes 8:12 pm
It doesn't bother me.
I've considered it as her term of endearment for me.
John Watson 8:14 pm
The look on her face was a bit funny, back when she first found out about us.
Sherlock Holmes 8:14 pm
She was only put off because she lost 20 quid in a bet to say if we were shagging or not.
Childish, really.
John Watson 8:16 pm
Ugh. I can't believe they had a bet going on. Lestrade was even in on it.
Sherlock Holmes 8:17 pm
Personally, I'm surprised at Lestrade. I've known the man for years, surely he would have been able to pick up on it.
Sometimes I really have doubts in his detective skills.
John Watson 8:18 pm
Come on, Sherlock. He's a good man.
And I like to think we weren't all that obvious about it.
Sherlock Holmes 8:19 pm
Holding hands isn't obvious?
John Watson 8:20 pm
Well... okay, a little, sure, but not obvious that we're shagging. They could've just written it off as you being you and your possessive self.
Sherlock Holmes 8:21 pm
Possessive?
I'm not possesive.
Obsessive, yes perhaps.
John Watson 8:21 pm
Possesive, too.
Sherlock Holmes 8:21 pm
Am not.
John Watson 8:21 pm
Are too.
Sherlock Holmes 8:22 pm
Since when?
John Watson 8:22 pm
You want an example?
Since my first date with Sarah when you just insisted on coming along.
See? Possessive.
Sherlock Holmes 8:23 pm
Wrong.
That was work related.
John Watson 8:24 pm
Still.
You're the jealous type.
Sherlock Holmes 8:25 pm
Maybe a little bit.
i'll admit, I am not without some flaws.
But what of you then?
You're not exactly innocent either.
John Watson 8:25 pm
Admitting you're not perfect? Can I get that in writing?
Never said I was.
Sherlock Holmes 8:26 pm
You have it in text, that's good enough due to modern standards.
Besides, just what exactly were you thinking when you shot that cabbie?
Sherlock Holmes 8:26 pm
A bit of a risk there, seeing as though you had only known me for little over two days.
That's not possesive?
John Watson 8:27 pm
That was called saving my new flatmate's life.
Sherlock Holmes 8:27 pm
Ah, right.
Had I been any other bloke, you would have done the same?
John Watson 8:28 pm
You don't think I would have?
Sherlock Holmes 8:28 pm
Don't answer me with another question.
Just answer.
John Watson 8:29 pm
Fine, then yes,
Granted, I knew enough about you to know I couldn't deprive the world of its only consulting detective.
And I really needed a flatmate.
Sherlock Holmes 8:31 pm
You needed a flatmate enough to track me down though London in the middle of the night and shoot an elderly man, killing him, just to ensure a flatmate?
John Watson 8:32 pm
Yep.
He was an awful cabbie.
I was doing the world a favor.
Sherlock Holmes 8:34 pm
Awful cabbie as he may have been, the man was nothing short of brilliant in his own right.
Shame, really. Such watsed talent.
John Watson 8:35 pm
Sorry. Next time I'll just let you take the pill.
Sherlock Holmes 8:36 pm
Care to write that down on a prescription for me?
John Watson 8:37 pm
Ha ha.
Sherlock Holmes 8:37 pm
See? My sense of humor is improving.
John Watson 8:37 pm
I must be rubbing off on you.
Sherlock Holmes 8:38 pm
You're such a bad influence John.
Shame on you.
John Watson 8:39 pm
Again, you're welcome.
Sherlock Holmes 8:41 pm
I'm not exactly thanking you.
Though I have noticed something a little peculiar...
Sherlock Holmes 8:41 pm
...people seem a bit more tolerant of me lately. It's odd.
Can't tell if it's just me or them.
John Watson 8:43 pm
Hmm.
Going a bit soft in your old age, I suppose.
Sherlock Holmes 8:44 pm
You're older then me.
John Watson 8:44 pm
I know, it was a joke. Sorry.
Sherlock Holmes 8:44 pm
Oh right. Humor.
John Watson 8:44 pm
Its not a bad thing, Sherlock. Getting along with people and all that.
Sherlock Holmes 8:45 pm
Of course it is.
It's awful.
John Watson 8:45 pm
Right, because heaven forbid you might actually have something akin to 'friends.'
Sherlock Holmes 8:45 pm
Exactly.
Having friends is too much of a responsibility.
Sherlock Holmes 8:46 pm
I'd rather pass on that, thanks.
John Watson 8:47 pm
Its how people function, you know. Friends help with that. I mean, you've got me. Am I too much of a responsibility?
Sherlock Holmes 8:47 pm
You're not my friend.
It's different.
John Watson 8:48 pm
Well, technically, I'm your boyfriend. How is that so different?
Sherlock Holmes 8:49 pm
It just is.
John Watson 8:49 pm
Not a very good reason, there.
Sherlock Holmes 8:50 pm
I've put you in a different category.
John Watson 8:50 pm
So you can have friends in a different category than me.
What about Lestrade? He's a friend, isn't he?
Sherlock Holmes 8:51 pm
He's a bit different too.
We've worked together for years.
John Watson 8:52 pm
Alright. Is he more of a father figure?
Sherlock Holmes 8:53 pm
Well he's certainly not that old.
John Watson 8:56 pm
Yes, I know, but still. I could see it.
Sherlock Holmes 8:57 pm
Oh?
Alright then.
Deduce it for me.
John Watson 9:01 pm
Alright, well, he is in a position of authority and power, obviously. I think he's done a good bit of looking out for you, before I came along.
And despite the hell you often put him through, I think he cares about you, and yes, you him.
Sherlock Holmes 9:02 pm
That all?
John Watson 9:02 pm
Do you need more?
Sherlock Holmes 9:03 pm
Well aside from the blatantly obvious.
There are other reasons.
John Watson 9:03 pm
So you agree then.
Sherlock Holmes 9:03 pm
I never said that.
John Watson 9:04 pm
Alright, get on with it, then.
Sherlock Holmes 9:06 pm
We have something of a history together, like I said, it's been years. The man has been of a great deal of help to me in the past.
John Watson 9:07 pm
Well yes, there's that too. That goes without saying.
So there. You've got Greg. And me. And Mrs. Hudson. All in our own separate categories, I'm sure.
Sherlock Holmes 9:09 pm
It's a very exclusive group I suppose.
John Watson 9:14 pm
I'm honored to be in it then, I'm sure.
Sherlock Holmes 9:15 pm
You were flatmate number 4, you know. I didn't like the others nearly as much as I had taken a liking to you.
John Watson 9:16 pm
That's encouraging.
Sherlock Holmes 9:16 pm
Isn't it?
Sherlock Holmes 9:16 pm
I was surprised you hadn't run off screaming like the first two.
John Watson 9:17 pm
Oh? Did they find a jar of fingers in the fridge? Or was it just your lovely personality?
Sherlock Holmes 9:20 pm
It was a torso actually.
Opened ribcage.
I was surprised, because this was a young man fresh from Uni who studied the medical field, I didn't think he would mind. Suppose I was mistaken.
He had a weak stomache for someone who wanted to be a surgeon.
John Watson 9:22 pm
Oh, right. Well. That might have put me off a bit, but I don't think I would have run off screaming like a little girl.
John Watson 9:22 pm
So what, were you trying to get yourself a medical flatmate, then?
Sherlock Holmes 9:24 pm
He didn't really scream, per se, the second one was the more vocal one who actually fled without so much as taking his things with him.
To be honest, it was a coincidence really, about the whole medical field thing.
John Watson 9:28 pm
An added bonus, I'm sure.
Sherlock Holmes 9:28 pm
Well, yes.
Sherlock Holmes 9:31 pm
Oh, before I forget, has Mycroft texted you at all today?
And be honest.
I'll know if you're lying.
John Watson 9:31 pm
You'll know if I'm lying over text. Really.
Sherlock Holmes 9:31 pm
I have resources.
John Watson 9:33 pm
I'm sure I don't want to know. Yes, he texted me today. Once. I didn't think it was worth telling you about, however.
Sherlock Holmes 9:34 pm
Ah alright.
He's gotten a new number then.
John Watson 9:35 pm
What, he hasn't texted you since he got a new number?
Thought he texted you on a daily basis or something to that effect.
Sherlock Holmes 9:36 pm
Oh he has. I was just curious because I had blocked his old number from your mobile.
He's got a new one now apparently.
John Watson 9:36 pm
You blocked his number.
Without asking me first.
Sherlock Holmes 9:36 pm
Problem?
John Watson 9:37 pm
Have you done this with any other numbers in my mobile?
Sherlock Holmes 9:37 pm
Maybe.
Sherlock Holmes 9:37 pm
Been missing any calls from anyone?
John Watson 9:39 pm
Well, now that you mention it... yes.
This is a bit not good, Sherlock.
Sherlock Holmes 9:39 pm
Is it?
John Watson 9:40 pm
I don't mind missing texts or calls from your brother, however. But that just means he's going to make more unexpected 'visits' to the flat.
Sherlock Holmes 9:40 pm
He never stays long.
Thank goodness.
Next time he stops by, tell him the church is having a bake sale.
John Watson 9:42 pm
Funny.
Sherlock Holmes 9:42 pm
I'm on a roll with this humor thing tonight.
Though I really should be working on this casefile. You're being a bad influence again.
John Watson 9:43 pm
I'm not keeping you from it. Just like you're not keeping me from my blog.
Sherlock Holmes 9:44 pm
Oh goody.
You and your blog.
What's it about this time ?
John Watson 9:47 pm
Sarcasm - lowest form of wit, Sherlock.
Sherlock Holmes 9:47 pm
I invented sarcasm.
John Watson 9:48 pm
I was actually blogging a bit about how hip I've become, with all this technology. Bit proud of myself, really.
And I might have mentioned you here and there, too.
Sherlock Holmes 9:49 pm
Only all the bad things I bet.
I do find it funny how you've managed to romanticized the way I do my job.
Quite a way with words there, I'll admit.
John Watson 9:51 pm
A compliment? Thank you, Sherlock.
Sherlock Holmes 9:51 pm
Clearly, you've missed your calling.
Sherlock Holmes 9:51 pm
I still don't care for it very much though.
John Watson 9:53 pm
Yep, knew that was coming.
John Watson 9:53 pm
Should have become a writer, yeah. My fans do appreciate my work.
Sherlock Holmes 9:54 pm
You've obtained quite a few, fromt he last time I checked your site.
John Watson 9:55 pm
Oh yes, the offers for dates have been flooding my inbox.
Sherlock Holmes 9:56 pm
Dates?
Really?
How many?
John Watson 9:57 pm
Hm, lost count.
Sherlock Holmes 9:58 pm
Well, it's not like you've taken them up on the offers or anything.
Right?
You haven't ?
Sherlock Holmes 9:58 pm
You've been home most of the time.
Or at the clinic.
Though there was that one time.
You said your phone died.
John Watson 9:59 pm
Oh, no, keep going. I'm sure you can deduce it for yourself.
You know how I enjoy it when you do.
Sherlock Holmes 10:00 pm
Well, I had been texting you quite frequently that day, so it's possible it was dead, or at the very least dying and you were avoiding my texts till I send you something of urgency.
Or
You were out seeing one of your fans and showing them a good time.
John Watson 10:02 pm
Its a good deduction.
Either one, really.
Sherlock Holmes 10:03 pm
Or both.
John Watson 10:04 pm
Question is, which one is it? Which one sounds like me?
I mean, I wasn't called 'Hotson' for nothing.
Sherlock Holmes 10:06 pm
More then likely... neither. While it was possible that your phone was dying, seeing as it's an older make, you could also have just been avoiding my barrage of texts. I recall you being a bit annoyed with me earlier that morning. Though at the moment it slips my mind as to why exactly.
John Watson 10:07 pm
Probably one of your experiments.
Sherlock Holmes 10:08 pm
Probably.
While I won't deny that you are indeed a man with a curious eye, who does seem to fancy himself some of the more finer things, especially withy our history with women inthe past. I don't think you'd be the type to hook up over the internet with some faceless stranger.
John Watson 10:10 pm
More to the point, I'm not the type to 'hook up' with someone when I've already got you.
But it was tempting to see how jealous you could get.
Sherlock Holmes 10:12 pm
touché
John Watson 10:19 pm
Its a bit endearing, really.
Sherlock Holmes 10:19 pm
I wasn't jealous.
I was curious.
There's a difference.
John Watson 10:19 pm
Not even a little jealous?
Sherlock Holmes 10:21 pm
Well....
John Watson 10:21 pm
Because it might have been a turn-on, you know.
If you were, jealous, that is.
Sherlock Holmes 10:22 pm
..oh?
John Watson 10:23 pm
Yes.
Sherlock Holmes 10:23 pm
I may have been.
A little bit.
John Watson 10:23 pm
That's what I thought.
Sherlock Holmes 10:24 pm
You thought nothing.
Stop that.
John Watson 10:25 pm
Right, of course.
My mistake.
Sherlock Holmes 10:26 pm
Out of curiosity though...
what are your turn-ons?
John Watson 10:27 pm
Surely you know most of them by now.
Sherlock Holmes 10:27 pm
Well yes, I've compiled a mental list, and it grows a little bit with each experience.
Sherlock Holmes 10:27 pm
I've even discovered some that you may not have been aware of.
Though it's mostly the physical stimuli.
John Watson 10:28 pm
There are those, yes. Quite a few when it comes to you.
Sherlock Holmes 10:30 pm
Really? So you're saying if someone else were to touch you, the same exact way as I had, you would feel differently?
John Watson 10:33 pm
No one could touch me the same exact way as you have, Sherlock, and no one can mimick your voice perfectly. Yes, that's one of the turn-ons, as well.
Also, I'm attracted to you, and there's the emotions behind that, as well, which all factors in.
Sherlock Holmes 10:35 pm
I suppose the better question should have been, what are your turn-offs ?
John Watson 10:38 pm
Had to think a moment about that one.
In women, too much make-up, or just too much... fake characteristics, I suppose. More in general, someone who tries to hard to please, someone who's weak, a lack of trust, a lack of self-esteem, a lack of self confidence... my partner being unresponsive in bed, faking it there, that sort of thing.
Sherlock Holmes 10:41 pm
Actually, I was referring to me. But this explaination works too.
John Watson 10:42 pm
Oh.
The experiments you leave around the kitchen, then.
Sherlock Holmes 10:43 pm
That all ?
John Watson 10:44 pm
That's the biggest one. I'm a bit tired, though. I'm sure I'll think of more later.
Sherlock Holmes 10:45 pm
You should sleep then
And compile a list for me in the morning.
John Watson 10:46 pm
Why so keen on knowing this?
Sherlock Holmes 10:46 pm
For reference.
John Watson 10:46 pm
I might just let you figure it out on your own. I'm happy with how things are, you know - you're good about knowing what I like.
Come to bed when you're done with the case file, alright? Get at least your four hours of sleep tonight.
Sherlock Holmes 10:48 pm
Not sure how long it'll take.
Sherlock Holmes 10:48 pm
But I'll try not to wake you when I do decide to turn in.
John Watson 10:49 pm
Alright. Thanks. I'll stop distracting you, anyhow.
Sherlock Holmes 10:50 pm
I can multi-task.
John Watson 10:52 pm
Well I'm about to fall asleep on the keyboard, and I've got work in the morning, so. I'm signing off
Sherlock Holmes 10:53 pm
You and your sleeping. I don't see how you do it every night.
I'll come join you in a couple hours though.
John Watson 10:54 pm
Can't function without sleep like you can.
Sherlock Holmes 10:54 pm
I sleep. Sometimes.
John Watson 10:56 pm
You don't sleep enough.
Sherlock Holmes 10:56 pm
I sleep plenty. It's boring anyway.
John Watson 10:57 pm
You said the same thing about breathing, but that doesn't mean you stop breathing.
Sherlock Holmes 10:57 pm
Point proven.
John Watson 11:00 pm
I'm too tired to argue.
Sherlock Holmes 11:01 pm
Sleep.
Or would you rather I come up and tuck you in?
John Watson 11:02 pm
Nice. Do I get a goodnight kiss as well, then?
Sherlock Holmes 11:02 pm
Of course dear.
Sherlock Holmes 11:02 pm
I'll even sing the Soft Kitty song.
John Watson 11:05 pm
Aren't we feeling especially affectionate tonight?
Sherlock Holmes 11:07 pm
It's the casefile. I just realized the victim had a connection with another victim we investigated about three months ago. Same dentist.
So I'm in a lighter mood.
John Watson 11:08 pm
Fascinating. Why don't you just read the casefile to me, then? It'll be sure to set me right off to sleep.
Sherlock Holmes 11:10 pm
But it's too interesting, you couldn't possibly fall asleep to it.
John Watson 11:11 pm
Right, sure. Soft kitty it is, then.
Sherlock Holmes 11:12 pm
Good. Then I'll be up in a few once I've finished this writeup.
John Watson 11:13 pm
Alright, thanks.