Dayzz

Jul 02, 2006 23:20

Went to a work Lagoon day not long ago. Lagoon is a local/regional theme park comparable to Great America for those of you in the Bay Area. My employers was very generous with gifts, but the Arkansas gods cursed me with the only prize I'd feel guilty about using: a Wal-Mart gift certificate.

My brother wanted my very little brother Steven to be dropped on the "Sky Coaster" which is just this kinda giant swing where you're put into harnesses and pay Lagoon to drop you. Phill said something about Stephen needing to conquer his fears although it was interestingly Phillip who was afraid to be dropped. They agreed to be dropped with a really weird highschooler from Idaho. The kid's dad smelled like homemade vodka.

They begged for staff to drop with them. More bodies makes the drop faster, apparently. The ride manager explained that staff companions are strictly forbidden, but that they could choose a suitably massive person to fall with them gratis. My brother pulled out $20 in spite of the manager's words. I love him more than any person on earth, but I still know that he helps satisfy P. T. Barnum's quota.

Folks play lots of parts in life. One of my roles is United States. I'm get along ineptly with my peers. Also, in any context and according to any definition, I'm invariably "the big one." So they dropped me. Nothing much, I think.

Saw the Superman movie. Would have been better if Lex Luther was more like Verbal. Actually, it would have been better almost no matter what. Actually, I'm not in the mood to see a fictional New York City almost destroyed by fictional disasters. Sorry.

Also saw the "Taylorsville Dayzz" fireworks. Jon Moore and I played a game predicting sounds each explosion would make. Onomatopoeia is tough to judge ("that was more of a 'thoom' than a 'boom'!"). We decided that "Taylorsville Dayzz" commemorates the end of Taylorsville's bloody war with West Valley City. This war was only resolved with a ceasefire and a shopping center, so technically it's still going. In rebellion from West Valley (and the rest of the English-speaking world, apparently) Taylorsville resolved to end all plurals with two 'z's instead of an 's'.

Incidentally, my war with Provo isn't going well. I did, however, prevent Sean Hannity from once again speaking at their "Stadium of Fire" celebration. (This fireworks display commemorates the day BYU burned to the ground and was rebuilt by androids lacking life-like shoulders, necessitating the current Honour Code.) I sent the American Idol guy to Provo instead. That'll teach them to boot my car!

I was wrong about capture-the-flag. We played again tonight. No one ever found the flags. The game ended unresolved with impatient parents honking their horns. I evaded capture three times though, making this night very surprising. I can cross the ditch in one galloping stride while everyone else has to leap it, losing speed. I should celebrate by walking to Dee's Family Restaurant for some patriotic pancakes.
Previous post Next post
Up