Comments | mikiya2200: Am I already gone?

mikiya2200

Am I already gone?

Feb 15, 2011 21:34

Rating: PG-13
Characters: Sam

Pairing: gen / no pairing
Disclaimer: I don't own the boys, I don't own the car and I will give them back as soon as I'm finished with them.
Word Count: ~3.000

Summary: For the second time in my life I'm forced to become someone that I'm not, Sam-the-hunter is slowly being rebuilt into Sam-the-demon and no matter how ( Read more... )

spn sam, fanfiction, supernatural, episode tags

Comments 2

ghostfour February 19 2011, 12:57:24 UTC

This just makes me sad for Sam all over again. Because yes, Dean's deal left Sam in the worst possible position, and took away his choice *again*. And all anyone ever sees is Dean's sacrifice (which was a sacrifice) but never that Dean *also* took what he felt was the *lesser* of too pains (hell vs living as the last Winchester) and left Sam dealing with being alone. I'm not so much faulting Dean for making the deal, as with his refusal to admit what that deal did to Sam. Sam *chose* to die human and clean - he could have killed Jake and been YED's favorite, but he chose *not* to. And as understandable as Dean;s deal was, it still stole that choice away from Sam, left him alone and vulnerable and a little less human than he had been ( ... )

mikiya2200 February 19 2011, 19:27:59 UTC

You know, this "never opening his mouth" and really telling Dean what that deal did to *him* (or even blaming him for it), that's really one of Sam's "qualities" that I can't take anymore. Not when Dean, at the same time, goes on and on and on blaming Sam for the stuff he did. I don't want them fighting, not anymore, I've had enough of this, but the fact that Sam just accepts and accepts and accepts... Really, no more of that. That's why I *needed* to write this, that's why I needed him, at least once, to think back and realize that not everything was his fault. It's too sad that he never, ever says something like that on the show, but... well, you already know what I think about *that* so there's nothing new I can tell you... ;)

Anyway, I don't think I'd write something like this, now, two years after the fourth season, but it's nice to see where my head was at that time, brings back a lot of memories...