He never arrived. The things I have said and thought... Thats the reason why - its becoming a punishment and not just a lesson. Yes I will learn & have learnt but today the sunlight hurts so much. It was easier in the dark in the damp - I felt more a part of the disappointing scene. No he never arrived and now he will leave. I have too many ( Read more... )

Its all glowing (going) now. Watching them wait; for what? Wanting to teach her the things I pretend to know while cigarettes burn and beer disappears. Waking to rain, mud on our calves. Ripping plastic and stifling the smile thats growing. Smoke in lungs & fire in eyes! If I believed Id say 'thank god' but I dont so Ill just say thank you instead ( Read more... )

sunburnt skin and rain in shining light. who could have told me this? sand in nails. noodles on plates.
plans on pages (& films about sages). soon. tal gets it. we leave these things when we learn; too goddamn spikey, too goddamn spikey for us! its a good thing to know. its a good thing, too. no! (yes?)

skinny leg jeans back on
and i feel like myself?
that was an accidental question mark.

i was riding that giant automobile
thinking about the dust on the ground
and the gravel in the air

i'm all pipe cleaners and crayons today,
yeah, southwestern cooking and nonstick pans
avoiding plastic bags
HITTING THE WRONG KEYS
but then fixing it

yay?
except for ( Read more... )

monitoring my monitor which flashes. underneath that blackness is an orange spot which says he's asleep. underneath the sleep is a man who is totally awake. maybe a boy (as if there's a difference). but he's awake even in sleep. and when he wakes up he'll be dreamy. feverish. even once those antibodies have done their duty to him. he will listen to ( Read more... )

Remember you said
"self-indulgent funeral visions"?

You had scratchy gravelly memories,
but nothing to mourn for.

We will be strange bedfellows under my house,
while we think of bodies that aren't nearby.


( Read more... )

elasticky fabrics and liquidy inky thoughts kind of stick to the side of this wood.

so painfully stuck to this floor, as the edges wipe sensation from my toes and miscellaneous particles shine at different times. after trying to suck this out of the atmosphere for so long...but what else can i do? there is no space. after trying to fake it...nails ( Read more... )

The pin prick of that note spurs me into action. I note my confidence. My reckless speed. You can taste it (touch it). It makes me hesitate. But the white plastic can't slip from this fleshy grip. Everything is twice. Everything is transperant. Smash that glass into my wide open eyes and slice this gulping neck open. Slice it open and take the dust ( Read more... )