[EXO] with you (i can do anything)

Nov 30, 2015 15:24

Title: with you (i can do anything)
Pairing(s): Junmyeon/Jongdae
Rating: PG
Word Count: 2,423
Warnings: mpreg, mentions of former members
Summary: Jongdae realizes that life doesn’t always go the way that you want it to go, but decides that if he’s with Junmyeon, he’ll always be okay.


"Jongdae," Junmyeon said, sitting on the bed next to his husband. "Please, please go visit the doctor. You keep saying that you're okay, but you haven't eaten much for the past week."

Jongdae sighed. He knew that Junmyeon was probably right - he normally was, after all - and that he should go visit the doctor. The thing was, he really, really hated it. He'd had a dislike for doctors ever since he was younger and his family doctor had pushed the stick - what was that stick even called? - too far down his throat and he'd gagged. It wasn't a memory that Jongdae liked to relive.

The problem was that Junmyeon knew this. Junmyeon knew how much he disliked doctor's appointments, making the whole incident more serious. Junmyeon wouldn't push him to do things that he didn't like unless it was important. The fact that Junmyeon was asking for Jongdae to visit the doctor meant that he really was worse for wear. Jongdae liked to dragged things on and on, mostly because he could. Junmyeon usually got strung along, but there were times where his husband would put his foot down.

Now was one of those occasions.

"Okay," Jongdae gave in. He didn't like to see Junmyeon so worried all the time. The frown that he was wearing didn't suit him. Jongdae reached up to gently smooth the wrinkle between Junmyeon's brows away, pressing a light kiss to his forehead. “But only so that you’ll stop worrying about me. You haven’t eaten much recently, have you?”

Junmyeon leaned into the touch, hand coming up to grasp Jongdae’s hand in his own and press a kiss to the center of his palm. Jongdae smiled at the gesture, eyes softening. “How could I?” Junmyeon asked. “You’ve had me sick with worry.”

“Was that a pun, Mr. Kim?” Jongdae teased, then turned serious. “Junmyeon, just because I haven’t been eating doesn’t mean you have to do the same, you know. I worry about you, too.”

“Now you know how I feel,” Came the huff. Jongdae laughed, leaning into his husband even more. “Promise me you’ll go see the doctor soon?”

Jongdae smiled. “Promise.”

Despite that, Jongdae doesn’t actually visit the doctor. It wasn’t a secret that the both of them were having a hard time, especially with monetary problems. Junmyeon’s parents had disowned him when he decided to make his relationship with Jongdae public, and Jongdae hadn’t seen his family in a long, long time.

Jongdae didn’t like to talk about it.

He continued to go to work as per normal, evading questions from Junmyeon about the visit to the doctor’s with almost professional precision. He knew how Junmyeon thought, and he always managed to avoid the prodding from his husband, gaining him at least one more day. It wouldn’t do to spend unnecessary money, after all. It was probably just a flu that would pass soon.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t only Junmyeon who seemed to think that he needed to make an appointment for a doctor’s visit, and that in itself annoyed Jongdae, but also made him think. Did he look that unwell?

“Jongdae,” Luhan, Jongdae’s superior had called him into his office. “Are you okay? You’ve been really pale lately, and the workload seems to be taking a toll on you. Have you been eating properly?”

Luhan was Jongdae’s superior, yes, but he was, first and foremost, Jongdae’s friend. Luhan had been his senior back in high school, the one who taught him Mandarin when he’d been failing his second language classes. He’d been Jongdae’s first crush, something that Junmyeon liked to grumble about a lot of the time, but that was a thing of the past. Plus, Luhan was already with someone else, now.

Jongdae slumped down onto the desk, Luhan’s fingers gently carding through his hair. It was a soothing gesture. While one that Luhan would normally not permit in the office, it seemed that Jongdae really did look worse than he’d originally thought.

“I’ve been nauseous for the past week or so, and it’s doing something to my appetite. Junmyeon keeps pushing me to go visit the doctor’s, but you know how things are currently, and I just-“ Jongdae cut himself off here, knowing Luhan already knew about their predicament. “I can’t afford it,” He finished off, voice so low he was almost whispering.

Luhan sighed, standing up to make a cup of tea for Jongdae, at least. He knew that the other’s pride wouldn’t let him accept any help, even if Luhan were to offer it. He’d been with Jongdae for a long time, even longer than he had been with Junmyeon, and he knew Jongdae, knew that he wouldn’t do anything about it until he started to break down.

It had always been one of Jongdae’s weaknesses.

“Drink,” Luhan said, and Jongdae blinked up at him. “Drink, you stubborn child. I know you won’t let me pay for the doctor’s visit even if I drag you there physically, so this is the least that I can do. And please, Jongdae,” Here, Luhan’s eyes softened in worry. “Please eat.”

Jongdae accepted the mug with both hands, looking down at it, then took a tentative sip. Warmth spread through his being, because of the tea but also because of Luhan’s concern. Luhan always liked to wear a strict mask, but he always took care of Jongdae, no matter what.

“I will,” Jongdae replied, continuing to take sips from the mug.

It wasn’t that Jongdae liked lying to Junmyeon. He hated it, in fact. It was no secret that Junmyeon detested liars, and Jongdae did not want to become one and be on the receiving end of Junmyeon’s wrath. He wasn’t lying, per se, Jongdae thought to himself. He’d promised Junmyeon that he would go to the doctor’s, he just hadn’t specified when he was going to go. He was just putting it off a little bit.

Jongdae rather thought that he’d put it off for a little bit too long when he felt his legs lose their energy and his knees buckled. There were suddenly too many dark spots in his vision, and he couldn’t keep himself up.

He could hear voices, some familiar, some not. Luhan’s voice was the easiest to recognize, shouting at someone to call for an ambulance. No, Jongdae wanted to protest. I can’t afford the hospital fees. But as it was, he was helpless, unable to speak, unable to even keep his eyes open.

“It’ll be okay,” A warm voice echoed in his mind, one that Jongdae vaguely recognized as Minseok’s, his co-worker. “Jongdae-ah, just calm down. Go to sleep. It’ll be okay.”

It’ll be okay, Jongdae thought, trusting in Minseok. Minseok wasn’t a very talkative person, but Jongdae knew how trustworthy he was. I’ll be okay.

Jongdae closed his eyes, and dreamt.

When he woke up, the first person that Jongdae saw was Junmyeon. The other was by his side, fingers interlinked with his, holding his hand even while he slept on the chair next to his bed. There was no way that it was comfortable, and judging my Junmyeon’s expression, he wasn’t sleeping that well, either.

The IV in his arm was uncomfortable, but Jongdae took no notice of the drip. He had landed himself in the hospital. There was no way that he was going to be able to pay for this, no way that he and Junmyeon could afford the hospital fees without having to live on ramyeon for a month or more, at least.

“Junmyeon,” Jongdae whispered, squeezing the hand that still held his, even in his sleep. What would he do without his husband, honestly? The one who stood by him no matter what happened, the one who constantly worried about him because Jongdae was a prideful person. “Junmyeon, wake up. Come on, love, sleep in the bed with me.”

Bleary eyes blinked open and stared at Jongdae, a little confused. Jongdae smiled sheepishly and attempted to tug Junmyeon into bed. His efforts were met with a frown, and Jongdae knew that he was in trouble.

Junmyeon shook his head, as though trying to physically shake the sleep out of his eyes. He was still frowning, the crease between his eyebrows getting deeper the more awake he became. Jongdae knew that he was going to be reprimanded, and he braced himself for the scolding.

“You lied to me,” Was what Junmyeon started with, and a wave of guilt surged through Jongdae, making his stomach drop. “You promised that you would visit the doctor. You didn’t, and now here we are. You fainted, Jongdae, you passed out and I got the call and I was so, so scared that something major had happened to you. Then Luhan told me that you hadn’t seen the doctor at all, and I panicked, because if anything had happened to you, then it would be my fault, because I should have been more firm, should have taken you to see the doctor myself when I knew how stubborn you were.”

Jongdae’s lips parted in guilt, watching Junmyeon berate himself for something that was entirely Jongdae’s fault. He shook his head, leaning forward to take Junmyeon’s hands into his, apologies falling from his lips. “It’s not your fault, Junmyeon,” Jongdae whispered, apologetic. “It’s not your fault, it never will be. I’m sorry for having lied to you; I won’t do it again, I’ll always listen to you from now on, Junmyeon, just please, please don’t blame yourself for this.”

“You’re in the hospital, Jongdae,” Junmyeon whispers. “It could’ve been serious; it could be serious.”

Jongdae wrapped his arms around Junmyeon, comforting. “I’m sorry, Junmyeon. I’m so, so sorry, but everything’s fine! I’m fine, I’m going to be fine, it’s just exhaustion, you’ll see.”

Junmyeon sighed shakily, bringing his arms up to wrap around Jongdae as well. He buried his face into Jongdae’s neck, the juncture between neck and shoulder his favourite spot. “Don’t ever scare me like that again, okay?”

“I promise,” Jongdae agreed. Never. He never wanted to see Junmyeon like that again, self-berating, afraid, his normally pale face white and ashen in his worry. “I won’t do it ever again.”

A smile crossed Junmyeon’s lips, allowing Jongdae to relax just a little bit. “I love you.”

“I love you too, husband.”

Of all the things that Jongdae had imagined for the doctor to inform him of - possible exhaustion, indigestion, lack of appetite caused by too much stress - congratulations had not been one of them.

But congratulations it was.

“It seems you’re a carrier, Mr. Kim,” The doctor, Wu Yifan, his nametag says, informs. “You’re already 7 weeks into your pregnancy.”

Jongdae’s eyes are so wide that he thinks that it’s a miracle that they’re still in his sockets, and Junmyeon’s jaw has decided that it doesn’t want to work anymore. He’d never known, he’d never been informed that he was a carrier, there was no history of it being in his family at all, and suddenly the news that he was a carrier, that he was pregnant hit him like a bullet train.

Dr. Wu smiled to himself, and left them with a soft murmur of “I’ll leave you two alone for a while.”

Jongdae inhaled deeply, trying to calm himself down. He was shell-shocked, and Junmyeon didn’t seem any better. They’d never used protection, never having known that Jongdae was a carrier, and since they’d both tested negative and were each other’s first and only, there had never been any point.

“I’m pregnant,” Jongdae said out loud.

“You’re pregnant,” Junmyeon echoed.

Jongdae swallowed, eyes downcast. How were they going to get through this? They were struggling as it was, trying to keep the both of them afloat was hard enough, and with a child, a child that he was carrying would make everything worse. He wouldn’t be able to work in the last trimester, and he wouldn’t be able to return to work until he’d recovered. Maternity leave was insured for in their company, but Jongdae wasn’t exactly female.

“Hey,” Junmyeon called, using a gentle hand to lift Jongdae’s head, thumb brushing against his high cheekbone and palm cupping Jongdae’s cheek. Jongdae looked up at his husband, who was giving him a concerned look. “What’s wrong, Jongdae?”

“How are we going to afford this?” Jongdae whispered, blinking away that tears that were welling up in his eyes. “We’re already struggling as it is. We won’t be able to afford the hospital fees, we won’t be able to pay for everything that the child needs, we won’t-“

“Shh,” Junmyeon soothed, lightly pressing his forehead to Jongdae’s. “Calm down, love. We’ll be all right. I don’t know how we’re going to do it either, but we’re going to be okay. Calm down, and don’t stress yourself out, Jongdae.”

Jongdae swallowed, took a deep breath and nodded. It was going to be hard, but Jongdae trusted in Junmyeon. As it was, he was already pregnant, there was nothing he could do about that, and as he gently pressed a hand to his stomach, Jongdae was hit with a wall of warmth that blossomed in his chest at Junmyeon’s love.

The soft smile that spread across Junmyeon’s face was calming, and Jongdae leaned into his husband. “We’ll be okay?”

Junmyeon chuckled, nodding. “We’ll be okay.”

“Then stop crying,” Jongdae chided gently, his hand coming up to wipe the tears from Junmyeon’s cheeks that the latter didn’t even know were there. Junmyeon blinked in confusion at the wetness on his cheeks, and then he laughed, nuzzling into Jongdae.

“Sorry,” He apologized, and Jongdae pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“Silly.”

“Papa!”

Junmyeon turned around at the call of his son, and crouched down with his arms spread for the little boy to barrel into. Junmyeon laughed and picked his son up, rubbing their noses together in an eskimo kiss that has his son squealing in delight.

“Dada!”

“Hey, Jongin,” Jongdae cooed at his son, pressing a soft kiss to the toddler’s forehead. “Missed me?”

“Yeah!” Jongin nodded, squirming in Junmyeon’s arms in an effort to get to Jongdae. “Missed you, Dada!”

“Yeah?” Jongdae asked again, laughing when Junmyeon comes up and wraps his arms around the both of them. “Did you miss Papa too?”

“I did, I did, I missed Dada and I missed Papa!”

Jongdae and Junmyeon laughed as Jongin hid his face in embarrassment, and just watching their child smile like this, just watching their child laugh like this, well.

It made everything worth it.

group: exo, rating: pg, character: yifan, character: luhan, pairing: suchen, character: jongin, character: jongdae, character: junmyeon, character: minseok

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