elegantly bound
elegantly bound
Yunho/Junsu
Junsu thinks that Yunho is a bit of an enigma.
For both skyfever and kayjayloves.
-
It's like a book elegantly bound,
but in a language that you can't read - just yet
You gotta spend some time-
love, you gotta spend some time with me
-
1.
Junsu thinks that Yunho is a bit of an enigma, even though really, they’re all laid out perfectly easy-to-read just for each other. Jaejoong’s palm slides perfectly into Yunho’s hand, whose smile personifies a bit of Yoochun’s heart, whose eyes radiate a bit of the youth that Changmin has, who sings with his soul and a small amount of Junsu’s, and Junsu has a few of Jaejoong’s dreams tucked away inside his own. There’s something about them together that’s not there when they’re alone, and even though Junsu can’t put his finger on it, he’s content with just having it.
2.
There’s something about Yunho when he’s alone, too, though, and Junsu can’t quite put a name to what that is, either. He’s a little more quiet and a little more lost and Junsu feels a bit of melancholy watching him when he’s alone, so he tries not to let him be (even though there’s a small, guilty part of him that wants it to stay, because there’s something painfully, fascinatingly beautiful about Yunho’s loneliness). He runs a little to catch up with Yunho’s long strides, and Yunho glances at him in surprise, but it’s the good kind, smiles back at Junsu when he grins at him first, and Junsu thinks that perhaps the smile is better than the quiet, because it is.
3.
Junsu tries not to let Yunho be lonely because then he stares into the night sky like he wants to be there, not here, and that scares Junsu, just a little. Maybe more than a little. Yunho admits he’s homesick when Junsu brings it up and Junsu wishes, for the smallest amount of time, that he hadn’t asked, but the bigger part of him wishes that he could do something more than just keep Yunho company. He apologizes then suddenly, and Yunho looks at him with wide, surprised eyes, but doesn’t ask why he’s saying what he’s saying. Junsu doesn’t know if Yunho understands why he’s saying sorry when he thinks that he doesn’t really understand it himself, but something tells him that Yunho might understand when Yunho turns to the night sky again and murmurs that there’s nothing to be forgiven and it’s okay if there is.
4.
Yunho’s not just a bit of an enigma, Junsu muses during a night when he can’t fall asleep. He’s like an elegantly bound book, but in a language that Junsu can’t read, sometimes. Junsu gives the definition to Yoochun one day but doesn’t say what the definition is for, and Yoochun barks a sudden laugh and says that whatever it is, it could be a synonym for love. Junsu doesn’t know what to say because he’s been struck speechless, and he wonders, surely not -
5.
Yunho’s leaning against the balcony railing and staring up at the night sky again, and Junsu is gripped with the fear that he might fall even though his brain points out that it’s never happened before, so it probably won’t now, but Junsu’s heart is the dominant one and it’s telling Junsu to open his mouth and tell Yunho to get away from the rail before he gives Junsu a heart attack.
Junsu opens his mouth and is about to say it but Yunho glances at him and smiles the tiny, enigmatic smile he only ever gives Junsu, and even though it’s elusive and wispy, Junsu feels like Yunho has just offered him his heart through something as simple as the curve of his lips. The words Yoochun said dance an insane, skipping tempo through Junsu’s mind and he feels just a bit breathless from the feeling of them - a synonym for love.
6.
He wonders to himself when it was that he started to fall in love with Yunho, and thinks it might have been when he started to think that Yunho was an enigma, or when he saw how quiet and alone he was, or when he tried to keep him company, or when Yunho forgave him for something he didn’t understand, or when he thought of what could define Yunho, or when Yunho smiled at him the way he did, the little smile that had a piece of his heart or all of it, Junsu isn’t sure which. He thinks that it could have been one of the times he sang with Yunho, or when Yunho helped him breathe in rooms full of strangers, or when Yunho made him feel loved when he missed Hyukjae and his family and the life he once had. Or maybe it was just the first time they’d met.
Yunho moves away from the railing and his smile’s a little wider, a little more real and a little less elusive, but it has the same amount of heart in it as it did before (and maybe a little more). Junsu realizes that the smile might be there because he’s there and not because of anything else, and this is what makes Junsu feel the strangest of all.
7.
Yunho’s frying Junsu’s brain cells one by one, Junsu thinks, with his elusive smiles and tired eyes. He’s making Junsu’s heart skip beats far too often, and his pulse is doing it again, running another five-mile marathon, when Yunho sweeps a sigh on the back of Junsu’s neck and his skin tingles there. They’re peeling potatoes, and there’s nothing romantic about it because Jaejoong’s just finished threatening them with knives and they’re dead if they don’t peel properly, but Junsu’s skin tingles anyway and his brain blames it on his stupid heart.
Yunho suddenly asks him to sing, and he’s bemused but he does anyway, in the kitchen with its fluorescent lighting and nearly imperceptible smell of kimchi. Yunho doesn’t take his eyes off Junsu until he’s finished the last long note, and they’re both a little breathless. Then Yunho offers a smile, and it’s one Junsu hasn’t seen for the longest time - it’s not the elusive smile or the kind smile or the a-little-wider smile or the smile-for-the-cameras. It’s one that reaches his eyes and shows a little bit of teeth and Junsu has another thing to add to his list of Reasons Why He Might’ve Fallen In Love With Yunho. Junsu thinks this one might have been it.
8.
His heart’s still in the smile, Junsu sees. He suddenly remembers how Yunho has always offered his heart to Junsu, and he’s always so overcome that he never realizes that it’s an offer, and that means he’s allowed to take it.
9.
Junsu takes it, then, and wonders what he can give in return because his everything is Yunho’s, anyway. He asks when he can’t think of anything, and Yunho says that he already has everything he needs.
2008-06-27
Yunho/Junsu
Junsu thinks that Yunho is a bit of an enigma.
For both skyfever and kayjayloves.
-
It's like a book elegantly bound,
but in a language that you can't read - just yet
You gotta spend some time-
love, you gotta spend some time with me
-
1.
Junsu thinks that Yunho is a bit of an enigma, even though really, they’re all laid out perfectly easy-to-read just for each other. Jaejoong’s palm slides perfectly into Yunho’s hand, whose smile personifies a bit of Yoochun’s heart, whose eyes radiate a bit of the youth that Changmin has, who sings with his soul and a small amount of Junsu’s, and Junsu has a few of Jaejoong’s dreams tucked away inside his own. There’s something about them together that’s not there when they’re alone, and even though Junsu can’t put his finger on it, he’s content with just having it.
2.
There’s something about Yunho when he’s alone, too, though, and Junsu can’t quite put a name to what that is, either. He’s a little more quiet and a little more lost and Junsu feels a bit of melancholy watching him when he’s alone, so he tries not to let him be (even though there’s a small, guilty part of him that wants it to stay, because there’s something painfully, fascinatingly beautiful about Yunho’s loneliness). He runs a little to catch up with Yunho’s long strides, and Yunho glances at him in surprise, but it’s the good kind, smiles back at Junsu when he grins at him first, and Junsu thinks that perhaps the smile is better than the quiet, because it is.
3.
Junsu tries not to let Yunho be lonely because then he stares into the night sky like he wants to be there, not here, and that scares Junsu, just a little. Maybe more than a little. Yunho admits he’s homesick when Junsu brings it up and Junsu wishes, for the smallest amount of time, that he hadn’t asked, but the bigger part of him wishes that he could do something more than just keep Yunho company. He apologizes then suddenly, and Yunho looks at him with wide, surprised eyes, but doesn’t ask why he’s saying what he’s saying. Junsu doesn’t know if Yunho understands why he’s saying sorry when he thinks that he doesn’t really understand it himself, but something tells him that Yunho might understand when Yunho turns to the night sky again and murmurs that there’s nothing to be forgiven and it’s okay if there is.
4.
Yunho’s not just a bit of an enigma, Junsu muses during a night when he can’t fall asleep. He’s like an elegantly bound book, but in a language that Junsu can’t read, sometimes. Junsu gives the definition to Yoochun one day but doesn’t say what the definition is for, and Yoochun barks a sudden laugh and says that whatever it is, it could be a synonym for love. Junsu doesn’t know what to say because he’s been struck speechless, and he wonders, surely not -
5.
Yunho’s leaning against the balcony railing and staring up at the night sky again, and Junsu is gripped with the fear that he might fall even though his brain points out that it’s never happened before, so it probably won’t now, but Junsu’s heart is the dominant one and it’s telling Junsu to open his mouth and tell Yunho to get away from the rail before he gives Junsu a heart attack.
Junsu opens his mouth and is about to say it but Yunho glances at him and smiles the tiny, enigmatic smile he only ever gives Junsu, and even though it’s elusive and wispy, Junsu feels like Yunho has just offered him his heart through something as simple as the curve of his lips. The words Yoochun said dance an insane, skipping tempo through Junsu’s mind and he feels just a bit breathless from the feeling of them - a synonym for love.
6.
He wonders to himself when it was that he started to fall in love with Yunho, and thinks it might have been when he started to think that Yunho was an enigma, or when he saw how quiet and alone he was, or when he tried to keep him company, or when Yunho forgave him for something he didn’t understand, or when he thought of what could define Yunho, or when Yunho smiled at him the way he did, the little smile that had a piece of his heart or all of it, Junsu isn’t sure which. He thinks that it could have been one of the times he sang with Yunho, or when Yunho helped him breathe in rooms full of strangers, or when Yunho made him feel loved when he missed Hyukjae and his family and the life he once had. Or maybe it was just the first time they’d met.
Yunho moves away from the railing and his smile’s a little wider, a little more real and a little less elusive, but it has the same amount of heart in it as it did before (and maybe a little more). Junsu realizes that the smile might be there because he’s there and not because of anything else, and this is what makes Junsu feel the strangest of all.
7.
Yunho’s frying Junsu’s brain cells one by one, Junsu thinks, with his elusive smiles and tired eyes. He’s making Junsu’s heart skip beats far too often, and his pulse is doing it again, running another five-mile marathon, when Yunho sweeps a sigh on the back of Junsu’s neck and his skin tingles there. They’re peeling potatoes, and there’s nothing romantic about it because Jaejoong’s just finished threatening them with knives and they’re dead if they don’t peel properly, but Junsu’s skin tingles anyway and his brain blames it on his stupid heart.
Yunho suddenly asks him to sing, and he’s bemused but he does anyway, in the kitchen with its fluorescent lighting and nearly imperceptible smell of kimchi. Yunho doesn’t take his eyes off Junsu until he’s finished the last long note, and they’re both a little breathless. Then Yunho offers a smile, and it’s one Junsu hasn’t seen for the longest time - it’s not the elusive smile or the kind smile or the a-little-wider smile or the smile-for-the-cameras. It’s one that reaches his eyes and shows a little bit of teeth and Junsu has another thing to add to his list of Reasons Why He Might’ve Fallen In Love With Yunho. Junsu thinks this one might have been it.
8.
His heart’s still in the smile, Junsu sees. He suddenly remembers how Yunho has always offered his heart to Junsu, and he’s always so overcome that he never realizes that it’s an offer, and that means he’s allowed to take it.
9.
Junsu takes it, then, and wonders what he can give in return because his everything is Yunho’s, anyway. He asks when he can’t think of anything, and Yunho says that he already has everything he needs.
2008-06-27