pushing and pulling
pushing and pulling
Hyukjae, Junsu (friendship)
This is for Kay.
You're so close
where do you end
Where do I begin?
Always pushing and pulling
Sometimes sanity takes vacation time on me
I'm in a daze stumbling bewildered
North of gravity head up in the stratosphere
You and I
roller coaster riding love
Junsu's been feeling strange all day and he thinks he might be coming down with something, but he calls Hyukjae anyway - it's late and dark but he feels lonely and some part of him thinks that talking will help him fill the gap. Talking to Hyukjae somehow always does.
"Hello?" Hyukjae's voice is tired and full of sleep and there is a little bit of guilt welling up in Junsu's chest but he quickly squashes it.
"Hey," his voice is a whisper, for some reason, and he hopes that Hyukjae won’t question.
"Su, is that you?" Hyukjae sounds a little more awake this time and Junsu hums in confirmation, and there's a short silence, but it's not uncomfortable, and even though it was Junsu's original intention to talk his stress away, he thinks that this isn't bad, either.
“How’re you?” says Junsu at last. There’s silence on the other end.
“Junsu, what’s wrong?” Hyukjae’s voice is a cross between amused and worried. “You never ask me how I am.” They usually don’t need to - somehow manage to just know, anyway.
“Nothing. I… don’t know,” Junsu sighs quietly. “I just feel strange. Tired.”
Hyukjae’s silent again, and then he says, “Junsu, do you want to meet up? We can talk about it if you want.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I’m not really sure what’s wrong with me.
“Then we can meet up anyway and I can blab and you can make fun of me.” Hyukjae waits for an answer.
Junsu smiles at last. “Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good,” because it does.
They meet in Starbucks at three in the morning. When Junsu sees Hyukjae, he’s wearing an old sweater that Junsu hasn’t seen for years. It has a faded soccer ball on it and it’s got a strange purple blob near the right shoulder because it had been Junsu’s until he gave it to Hyukjae because Hyukjae had decided it would be funny if he throw a paintball at Junsu when he was wearing it. The memory makes Junsu feel a little better.
Hyukjae leans forward and then back again. He has never been one for sitting still. “Do I actually have to blab before you tell me what’s wrong or can you just tell me?”
Junsu rolls his eyes. “I don’t know.”
“What do you mean, you don’t know? You’re supposed to know.”
Junsu sighed again. “Can’t you just blab? I don’t have anything to say.”
“Well, I don’t have anything to blab about,” says Hyukjae defiantly.
“You always have something to blab about,” says Junsu sardonically.
Hyukjae crosses his arms. “You only like talking to me because it makes you feel intelligent by insulting me!” Junsu has no reply for this because a small part of it is true.
“Look, I don’t know. I think I’m getting sick or something.” Junsu rolls his eyes again when Hyukjae makes a show of feeling his forehead and checking for a pulse.
“Well,” he announces, leaning back again, “Doctor Hyukjae declares that there is nothing wrong with the patient.”
Junsu scowls. “Get a life.”
“Stop pretending you’re cool and just join me,” Hyukjae retorts. Junsu wonders if it will be strange if he tackles Hyukjae in the middle of Starbucks at three in the morning. He decides that nothing is too strange at three in the morning and does so, and Hyukjae screams in laughter when Junsu’s fingers run up and down along his sides and they both ignore the stares of the other people in the café.
(Later, when they’re done with their coffee and leave for their separate dorms at four in the morning, Junsu thinks that he’s glad he has Hyukjae as a friend.)
2008-06-29
Hyukjae, Junsu (friendship)
This is for Kay.
You're so close
where do you end
Where do I begin?
Always pushing and pulling
Sometimes sanity takes vacation time on me
I'm in a daze stumbling bewildered
North of gravity head up in the stratosphere
You and I
roller coaster riding love
Junsu's been feeling strange all day and he thinks he might be coming down with something, but he calls Hyukjae anyway - it's late and dark but he feels lonely and some part of him thinks that talking will help him fill the gap. Talking to Hyukjae somehow always does.
"Hello?" Hyukjae's voice is tired and full of sleep and there is a little bit of guilt welling up in Junsu's chest but he quickly squashes it.
"Hey," his voice is a whisper, for some reason, and he hopes that Hyukjae won’t question.
"Su, is that you?" Hyukjae sounds a little more awake this time and Junsu hums in confirmation, and there's a short silence, but it's not uncomfortable, and even though it was Junsu's original intention to talk his stress away, he thinks that this isn't bad, either.
“How’re you?” says Junsu at last. There’s silence on the other end.
“Junsu, what’s wrong?” Hyukjae’s voice is a cross between amused and worried. “You never ask me how I am.” They usually don’t need to - somehow manage to just know, anyway.
“Nothing. I… don’t know,” Junsu sighs quietly. “I just feel strange. Tired.”
Hyukjae’s silent again, and then he says, “Junsu, do you want to meet up? We can talk about it if you want.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I’m not really sure what’s wrong with me.
“Then we can meet up anyway and I can blab and you can make fun of me.” Hyukjae waits for an answer.
Junsu smiles at last. “Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good,” because it does.
They meet in Starbucks at three in the morning. When Junsu sees Hyukjae, he’s wearing an old sweater that Junsu hasn’t seen for years. It has a faded soccer ball on it and it’s got a strange purple blob near the right shoulder because it had been Junsu’s until he gave it to Hyukjae because Hyukjae had decided it would be funny if he throw a paintball at Junsu when he was wearing it. The memory makes Junsu feel a little better.
Hyukjae leans forward and then back again. He has never been one for sitting still. “Do I actually have to blab before you tell me what’s wrong or can you just tell me?”
Junsu rolls his eyes. “I don’t know.”
“What do you mean, you don’t know? You’re supposed to know.”
Junsu sighed again. “Can’t you just blab? I don’t have anything to say.”
“Well, I don’t have anything to blab about,” says Hyukjae defiantly.
“You always have something to blab about,” says Junsu sardonically.
Hyukjae crosses his arms. “You only like talking to me because it makes you feel intelligent by insulting me!” Junsu has no reply for this because a small part of it is true.
“Look, I don’t know. I think I’m getting sick or something.” Junsu rolls his eyes again when Hyukjae makes a show of feeling his forehead and checking for a pulse.
“Well,” he announces, leaning back again, “Doctor Hyukjae declares that there is nothing wrong with the patient.”
Junsu scowls. “Get a life.”
“Stop pretending you’re cool and just join me,” Hyukjae retorts. Junsu wonders if it will be strange if he tackles Hyukjae in the middle of Starbucks at three in the morning. He decides that nothing is too strange at three in the morning and does so, and Hyukjae screams in laughter when Junsu’s fingers run up and down along his sides and they both ignore the stares of the other people in the café.
(Later, when they’re done with their coffee and leave for their separate dorms at four in the morning, Junsu thinks that he’s glad he has Hyukjae as a friend.)
2008-06-29