Not Over You → for EVERYONE (1/2)
Title: Not Over You
Pairing(s): Xiuyeol, Xiuhan
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 14341
Summary: Minseok has a boyfriend and sings for a rival band. And Chanyeol is kind of in love with him.
It's 8 o' clock, the night just barely descending upon Seoul as the street lights flicker on, illuminating cars and passers-by. And yet, in a nondescript downtown bar, people are swarming in by the dozens. Domino is nothing to be amazed at―faded sofas, wooden tables and chairs, and a few pool tables here and there. The centrepiece is the elevated stage in the middle of the bar, where the crowd is congregating at tonight.
It is as crowded as it can get. Everyone who's a fan of the underground indie scene in Seoul wants to get a glimpse of Toned Grey, the rising star of Seoul's band scene. Even though they're young, all of them below thirty years of age, they are still acclaimed for their quality music. All of them take part in music composition and production, and they already have an established sound that sets them apart from most rookie bands in the scene. It also helps that other than being incredibly talented, each of the members also have the looks to match, which often leads to people joke that they're "too good to be true". They also have an established fanbase, made up of mostly teenage girls who regularly attend their gigs around Seoul.
There are girls carrying enormous fanboards, with the members' names written on them, some splayed in blinding neon colours while others painstakingly done using LED lights. While a majority are here for Toned Grey, there is a considerable number here for Reinvent, a newly formed rock band that quickly rose to the forefront of the Seoul music scene.
At 8.30 pm, the MC strides out to thunderous applause.
"Welcome, everyone, to Domino. Are you guys excited for the bands that will be playing tonight?" he shouts, and the audience reciprocate with loud screams and claps.
"Glad to see that all of you are hyped up! Tonight we will have four bands lined up, so be prepared for a night of awesome music!"
The members of Toned Grey are lounging in the VIP room (which, in reality, is just a normal room with an added TV screen) waiting for their turn to go on stage. As expected, they're the grand finale.
"Baekhyun-hyung, please make sure your voice doesn't crack tonight. We've got lots of people watching us," Sehun says when Baekhyun is applying his eyeliner, and it catches the latter off guard.
"That was one time!" Baekhyun wails. He fumes at the uneven line in the mirror. "And you've ruined my eyeliner."
Chanyeol pets the lead singer sympathetically on the back. "Don't mind him, Baek. You'll do well tonight. All of us will."
"Hyungs! The performances are starting!" Jongin shushes all of them from the sofa. They watch from the TV in their lounge as the MC announces Reinvent, who are greeted with thunderous applause and cheers from their gaggle of supporters.
The band members make their way onstage and start setting up. A tall, built man carries his drum kit as the other members plug in amplifiers and tested their mikes. Reinvent, unlike Toned Grey, had a lot more male fans in their demographics. Although Toned Grey and Reinvent play music of different genres, it's hard for them not to be compared as both have overwhelmingly large fanbases, both are made up of good-looking young men under the age of thirty, and both write great music. Chanyeol recalls when Dispatch started reporting them as "the Reinvent of indie music" and Reinvent as "the Toned Grey of rock" and he laughs, more out of bemusement than anything. Although being subjected to comparison on so many levels, Chanyeol actually doesn't really know much about Reinvent, other than the fact that they're rivals.
A rather short blond takes the mic from the MC and speaks into it. "Hello everyone, we're Reinvent. I'm the lead singer, Xiumin, and we have Luhan on keyboard, Yixing on guitar and Zitao on drums." The volume of the cheers he receives is phenomenal. Chanyeol, for some reason, can't take his eyes off him. His hair is spiked and his eyeliner can rival Baekhyun's with the sheer amount that he has applied. He has round but angled cheeks, and when he smiles his pink gums show.
"Their lead is pretty hot," Sehun remarks, voicing out Chanyeol's thoughts. Chanyeol gulps, throat dry.
"Y-Yeah," he stutters out in agreement.
"Today, we have quite a number of songs lined up for you, so we hope you like them. Our first song is a cover of Maroon 5'sMisery. Then we have our own song entitled Where Are You, composed by our very talented Yixing. And lastly we'll be playing Never Forget, which fans will remember as our debut song. Thank you!" Xiumin says, waving to the crowd one last time before turning to make eye contact with his members. Their drummer Zitao nods in reply and hits the cymbals. Heavy twangs from the electronic guitar start sounding, guitarist Yixing losing himself to the music. Chanyeol nods his head to the addictive beat. Rock isn't really his genre, but he can't say he doesn't like it.
After the intro, Xiumin takes a deep breath and starts to sing.
Chanyeol freezes. Xiumin's voice isn't clear or soothing; rather, it has an oddly attractive huskiness that matches well with the tone of the song. The keyboards accompany Xiumin's voice perfectly as he belts out a high note. He isn't the most talented singer Chanyeol has heard, but he oozes confidence and the gaze that he sends to the audience through his half-lidded lashes does weird things to Chanyeol's heart, which starts to flip a little out of control. He's a little bewildered by all the feelings that he's experiencing―he never felt anything like it before. Xiumin looks straight at the camera through kohl-lined eyes and Chanyeol bites his lips to stop his inappropriate thoughts. There's too much sex appeal for a guy that tiny wearing a black leather jacket and ripped jeans. Chanyeol gulps and looks away, not knowing why his throat feels dry all of a sudden.
Reinvent perform the other two songs and Chanyeol's blown away by both of them. Xiumin's charisma―how he rolls his hips subtly to the rhythm, how his tongue darts out to wet his lips ever so often―rivets Chanyeol's attention on him and he conveniently forgets about the rest of his band.
"Thank you guys for being a great audience, this has been Reinvent!" Xiumin says when the beats of the last song fade out, and he smiles and waves, the whole band standing up to bow. By the time they exit the stage, all Chanyeol can remember is a pair of pretty eyes and a gummy smile.
"They're not bad," Baekhyun appraises after their performance ends. "I have to say, they're worthy of being our rival."
"Yeah, they were... pretty good," Chanyeol hastens to agree. He watches the following performances half-heartedly, not even hearing the next two bands even though they perform to the best of their ability. His mind is too preoccupied with thinking about Xiumin. Even though he knows it's practically a crime to like a band rival, he still can't help replaying his perfect smiles over and over again in his head.
This doesn't bode very well.
Before long it's Toned Grey's turn and Chanyeol doesn't even realise it until Sehun yanks him out of his chair.
"Don't make me do it again," the younger warns. "You're heavy, hyung."
They do final touch-ups to their makeup, and before long they hear the MC announce their band. They walk confidently on stage. They've done this countless times. They will own this.
"Hello everyone! We're Toned Grey!" Baekhyun speaks into the mic, wearing one of his brightest smiles. Their fans don't let them down as they cheer raucously while waving their banners around. "Today we'll be playing three songs. The first is Cover Up," a few fans squeal because it's one of their most famous songs, "the second is a cover of Urban Zakapa's Walk Backwards, and the last will be a crowd favourite, Wings and Tears."
As Baekhyun introduces their setlist, Chanyeol wonders why his heart seems to be jumping out of his throat. He's unusually nervous tonight. Without warning, they're given the cue to start and Chanyeol's fingers turn cold.
Baekhyun belts out the first few notes, then Chanyeol joins in by strumming on his guitar. Thankfully, he can still play without a hitch. Fangirls start chanting their names and Chanyeol revels in the sensation, reminded of why he loves performing so much. The adrenaline rush he gets is thrilling and more than enough to keep him on high for hours. He momentarily forgets about the boy with the kohl-lined eyes and loses himself in the music.
"Park Chanyeol!" A fangirl screams particularly loudly, and Chanyeol turns his head in the direction of the scream to spot a girl waving her Chanyeol banner extremely vigorously. He responds by winking in her direction, and the fans in his line of sight collectively start squealing. The fangirl, now shy, is hiding her face in her palms.
Chanyeol chuckles.Cute.
They play the other two songs without difficulty, Chanyeol, Jongin and Sehun harmonising for Baekhyun during the choruses. Chanyeol has a few lines of rap in Wings and Tears, and he looks at the fangirl from before while performing it. From the way she's hiding her face, he thinks she's about to cry of happiness.
"And that's it for tonight! Thank you all for coming and hope you enjoyed our performance!" Chanyeol hears Baekhyun say and they all bow before leaving the stage in a file.
"Great job everyone," Jongin is sincere with his compliments, and they high-five each other to congratulate themselves on another gig well done.
Out of the corner of his eye, Chanyeol spots Minseok backstage, talking to his fellow bandmates and laughing. His tongue darts out in nervousness, wetting his lips. Chanyeol's drawn to him like a magnet, seeking him out involuntarily. Yet, he finds it odd that he's nervous―after all, Chanyeol has never experienced difficulty approaching anyone before, being the extrovert that he is.
He convinces himself that he's just going for some friendly conversation between peers in the same line of occupation. Reinvent's three other Chinese members eye him curiously, but Minseok has his back turned and he doesn't notice as Chanyeol approaches them.
"Hi," Chanyeol says. Minseok turns at the unfamiliar voice and his eyes widen comically. Chanyeol finds it endearing and overwhelmingly cute.
"Hello," he responds after a beat. Somehow his bandmates take that as their cue to slip away, leaving Chanyeol and Minseok standing awkwardly in the middle of the waiting room. Chanyeol shifts on the heels of his feet.
"You're Chanyeol, right? Park Chanyeol, guitarist of Toned Grey." It's not even a question, but a statement.
Chanyeol lifts an eyebrow, pleasantly surprised. "Yeah." How did you know?
"You're pretty famous. Whole of Seoul music scene knows you." Minseok says almost like he's heard the question, unasked, on the tip of Chanyeol's tongue. It feels good to be recognised and admired, but Chanyeol feels a special sense of accomplishment when it's Minseok, of all people, that praise him. He feels slightly airy.
After a beat, Minseok sticks out his right hand. "Anyway, I'm Kim Minseok and I'm 25 years old. Xiumin is my stage name," Minseok explains.
If Minseok hadn't said so himself, Chanyeol would have a hard time believing that the man in front of him was any older than himself. Chanyeol takes the outstretched hand and shakes it. Minseok's grip is firm and Chanyeol really likes the warmth of his fingers.
"I'm Park Chanyeol, 23. Not that you don't know it already but," he's blabbering, oh God, why is he blabbering, "it's always good to formally introduce myself! Nice to meet you, Minseok-hyung." He smiles, teeth and all, and Minseok's lips lift up at the corners.
"I think you sing well. Was pretty amazed by your performance, actually," Chanyeol tells him when his hand drops back to his side.
"Thank you," Minseok grins. His gums are clean and his smile is a little crooked. Chanyeol must admit that he's very attractive.
He hears Jongin calling "Chanyeol-hyung" from the other side of the room and his facial features pinch.
"Sorry, I need to go." Smiling apologetically, he explains. Minseok shakes his head. "It's alright, it was nice talking to you."
As Chanyeol makes his way back, he innately curses Jongin and his impeccable timing.
When's he not too busy doing gigs or practising for them, Chanyeol works part-time at a quaint little CD shop tucked into a corner of Insadong. He loves music as much as life itself, so it's not surprising that both his jobs involve music. To him, music is an art, a way of expression, but at the same time it is so much more than that. It's his blood and soul, and he loves the way pure exhilaration courses through his veins when he listens to good music. Each note, each note, is like a word in a good book, weaving together to tell a spectacular story. Chanyeol loves it.
He's closing up shop when the wind chimes at the door tinkle, alerting him of a customer. Chanyeol looks up, about to give an apologetic Sorry, we're closed for the day, but maybe you could come back tomorrow when he realises, with a start, who has entered. The man is just as he remembers him―petite, with roundish cheeks and crescent-shaped eyes. He stares at Chanyeol for a bit, before breaking out into a smile as he recognises the man before him.
"Oh, it's you. Hi," Minseok greets.
"Uh, hi," Chanyeol says intelligently. Minseok's not dressed in anything fancy, wearing only a simple hoodie and washed-out jeans. He still looks stunning, though. Chanyeol would probably think that even if he shows up wearing a trash bag.
"Are you closing up shop?" Minseok inquires while his eyes roam around the shelves and shelves of CDs and albums. Chanyeol nods dumbly.
"I'm sorry, but you'll have to come again another time," he says, apology genuine in his voice.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I saw the sign said 'Closed' but I thought you'd maybe let me just find what I was looking for, you know. I'll be quick." Minseok looks at him with hopeful eyes and Chanyeol doesn't see the harm in it, so he agrees.
"Thanks a lot." Minseok smiles before heading towards the Local Singers section, scanning the shelves for something.
"Found it!" he exclaims triumphantly not a minute later, holding an exquisitely packaged album in his hands. Chanyeol peers over his shoulder.
"You like DBSK?" he asks. Minseok purses his lips and nods.
"Yeah, I do. I think their music is really good. How about you?" He clutches the album to his chest, almost as if he's afraid he'd drop it.
"I like them too, I think they're one of the classics of Korean music," Chanyeol shares honestly.
Tension seeps out of Minseok's shoulders after that, and he relaxes. "That's a relief. My bandmates all judge me because they say DBSK is overrated and packaged for teenage girls," he chuckles. Chanyeol thinks he has a nice laugh.
"I feel you completely. My bandmates complain I'm too mainstream, and they laugh at my collection of SNSD albums," he laments, recalling how Sehun and Jongin always riled him up over his music taste. Just because he is in an indie band doesn't mean he has to like hipster music! He shares that with Minseok and the latter is amused.
Minseok laughs and walks over to the counter, with Chanyeol following him. Chanyeol scans the purchase and there's a crinkling sound as he bags the album.
"Will that be all?" Chanyeol asks, as he hands Minseok a bag with the album in it.
"Yeah," the latter replies. "Sorry about coming in so late again." He doesn't turn immediately to leave, though, instead pursing his lips pensively. Chanyeol wonders what he's thinking about.
"Well, see you around." In the end, Minseok waves. "And thanks again for letting me in the shop!" He calls out before pushing open the door and exiting the shop.
The wind chimes tinkle softly as Chanyeol watches him till he's out of sight.
At first, Chanyeol tries to dismiss these thoughts, conflicted by what it would mean to him if he acknowledged them. Perhaps his attraction towards the lead singer of their rival band was just a passing infatuation. It would do no good to dwell upon these feelings when all they did was to consume him and envelope him in distress.
He knows, better than anyone, how fatal it is to fall for a member of a rival band. Jealousy and suspicion would inevitably ensue, and Chanyeol didn't want to subject himself and his bandmates to that kind of misery. It simply isn't worth it.
When Jongin asks him what's wrong, Chanyeol simply shrugs because really, how can you explain your feelings to someone when you can't even figure them out yourself? Jongin gives him an odd look, doesn't say a word and leaves, but Chanyeol feels guilty because he's keeping something from his bandmates and it's not right.
He stuffs his feelings away into a dusty little corner of his heart, and prays that he'll forget them.
Chanyeol's doing a pretty good job of it until he runs into Minseok, again.
Their second meeting is when Minseok comes in a week later. Chanyeol glances at the clock and notes that it's 15 minutes before closing time.
"Hi again, Chanyeol," Minseok greets with a bright smile. "I've been trying to find this album everywhere, but so far all the places I've been to don't sell it. So I thought of this shop," he explains, while craning his neck to search up and down the shelves.
"What album is it? I can help you find it."
"It's H.O.T's debut album, We Hate All Kinds of Violence," Minseok tells him while rifling through the various albums on the shelves. "Looks like you don't have it either." It's hard for Minseok to hide the disappointment surfacing on his features.
"I came here because your shop has one of the largest collection of CDs by far."
Chanyeol frowns, tapping a finger against his chin, trying to recall whether the album is still available. "Itis a very old album, and all the copies were sold out over a decade ago, and they stopped reprinting any new ones."
Minseok doesn't hide how crestfallen he is as his mouth droops. "I know, but I was hoping someone still had a copy," he pouts.
Chanyeol actually knows someone who does. His only copy of We Hate All Kinds of Violence was purchased online in an auction for about ten times the original price of the album. It was a steal. It's his most prized possession, and he refuses to let any of his friends so much as touch it, fearing they would dirty the album. After all, it is an old copy, one of the first edition prints. He had been elated for a couple of days after getting the album, and he couldn't bear the thought of giving it to someone else.
"You must really like H.O.T a lot, then," Chanyeol can't help but remark as he notes how disappointment is written all over Minseok's features.
"Yeah, I'm trying to amass a collection of all their album releases to date. But I can't get my hands on this particular one. I've kind of given up, to be honest." Minseok shrugs, but his face betrays his real feelings.
Chanyeol thinks long and hard, and promptly decides on something. "Actually, I have a copy at home. I could still lend it to you, if you want?" he offers. He doesn't miss the way Minseok's eyes instantly light up.
"Really? You'd do that?" Minseok gushes and Chanyeol swears his eyes are sparkling. He thought it was only possible with anime and manga characters.
"Yeah, but you have to return it unspoiled!" he says sternly. "Not so much as a scratch, or you'll have to pay for it."
"Definitely. I can't believe my luck though, thank you so much!" Minseok enthuses, looking at Chanyeol as if he just saved his life. Chanyeol finds it all very endearing.
Chanyeol tells Minseok to wait and he goes into the room at the back of the store, before coming out with a paper bag with the album inside. "Here you go," he says as he passes the album to Minseok, and it's nice to see Minseok's face light up in a brilliant smile as he takes it.
"Thank you so much!" Minseok repeats, again and again until Chanyeol's laughing.
"I get it, you don't have to thank me so many times," Chanyeol says jokingly, and Minseok laughs. Their conversation dies down and the shop returns to its original state of quiet.
"You know..." Minseok begins quietly, hesitant and almost unsure of what he's about to say, which makes Chanyeol perk his ears. "Maybe you could drop by the café I work in sometime? It's in Myeongdong and it'll be nice to see you there. I could return the album to me then," he suggests, looking at Chanyeol cautiously to gauge his reaction. Chanyeol smiles widely, pearly teeth showing. "Of course, I'd love to."
There's no stopping the grin that spreads across Minseok's cheeks. He whips out his phone and looks at Chanyeol expectantly. Chanyeol cocks his head in confusion.
"Phone number?" he asks. Oh. Chanyeol dutifully recites it, the familiar string of digits rolling off the tip of his tongue. Minseok sticks his tongue out a little as he saves it, a little action which Chanyeol doesn't miss. Cute, he thinks.
"Now I'll call your phone so you have my number." He presses the call button on his phone and DBSK's Mirotic suddenly starts playing, noise amplified tenfold in the quiet shop.
Chanyeol winces but Minseok just stares at him, wide-eyed, before breaking out into a knowing grin.
"Well, well, well," he says, "looks like this marks the start of a beautiful friendship."
Chanyeol smiles as well, feeling something warm and fuzzy in his chest. He hopes it is.
Chanyeol is texting Minseok to arrange a time for him to go to the café,Sehun is boredly picking at his fingernails and Jongin reads the menu for the third time. There'ssoju already ordered on the table, but no one's drinking it yet. Baekhyun is fashionably late, as always. It's Friday night and as per tradition, all of Toned Grey (with the exception of Baekhyun) arrive at 7 pm at a ramen restaurant for dinner. No one really knows how this tradition started or why it's a ramen restaurant of all places, but ramen is delicious and that's enough of a reason.
"Guess what, guys," Baekhyun trills as he pushes open the glass doors, eyes shining with excitement. Chanyeol checks his phone. 7.15 pm. Not one of his worst records.
"What," Sehun says disinterestedly as Jongin glances over at Baekhyun. Chanyeol perks up in his seat, phone forgotten as he listens attentively to what the eldest has to say.
Baekhyun slides into his seat next to Chanyeol. "I signed us up for the Jisan Valley Rock Festival. We'll be competing against other bands and singers, and the winner gets to take home 100 million won!" Baekhyun announces happily, arms waving around like he always does when he's especially excited. None of them notice the other diners staring at them angrily.
Chanyeol's jaw drops while Sehun and Jongin stare at Baekhyun, goggle-eyed. Baekhyun frowns. "What are you people staring at? I know my face is handsome, but this is really creepy."
And with Baekhyun's dose of narcissism, the rest revert back to their old selves, Sehuntsking and muttering something about how Baekhyun-hyung needs a reality check. Baekhyun, of course, pretends not to hear it as he pours soju into each of their mugs.
"Dude. 100 million won is a whole lot of money. If we win..." Jongin trails off, too busy thinking of the various wonderful possibilities to even bother finishing his sentence.
"First thing, I'll move out of my stinky dorm I share with my roommate. And buy a penthouse and a limousine," Sehun starts fantasising, already grinning widely at the sheer thought of having so much money.
Chanyeol smiles, liking the familiar feeling of all of them working together.
"Yeah," Chanyeol speaks up with determination. "Let's win this."
"Cheers!" Baekhyun yells, and the four clink their glasses together. They spend the rest of dinner discussing how to spend their windfall over ramen and soju. Sehun and Baekhyun build castles in the air, suggesting impractical things like buying a penthouse in America and going to Antarctica to see the penguins. Maybe it's the alcohol, but soon enough everything around Chanyeol fades into this soothing, familiar buzz.
"Are you guys free for practice this Saturday?" Jongin asks. Baekhyun and Sehun nod immediately, while Chanyeol hesitates. He's arranged to see Minseok then.
Sehun is the quickest to pick up on Chanyeol's change in expression. "Why, hyung, do you have something on?"
"Uh, I'm meeting someone..." He trails off, unsure of what else to say. He hasn't planned to tell his bandmates so soon (after all, there's nothing going on between Minseok and him, and telling his bandmates is akin to admitting that there is.) Perhaps he can tell them after, prepare a little speech in his head and brace himself for how they're going to react. He's not ready to say it now.
"Ooh, Chanyeol's going on a date! It's been so long, I thought you were going to get blue balls," Baekhyun cackles loudly and Chanyeol smacks him on the head. Baekhyun's big mouth is his worst fault.
"Who is it, hyung?" Jongin eyes him in interest. Chanyeol hems and haws but doesn't say it.
"Too shy to tell us? But we've been your friends since forever!" Baekhyun pouts. "There's nothing you ought to be keeping from us."
"It's not even a date in the first place," Chanyeol murmurs. "We're just... acquaintances."
"It's fine, we won't push it. But you have to tell us after you meet him," Sehun concedes, finds a middle ground that Chanyeol is grateful for.
"Alright, I will," he promises.
Chanyeol spends an hour deciding what to wear, even though he's aware that it's only a casual meeting. When he finally settles on a pale blue shirt and faded jeans it's almost five. He rushes out of his apartment in a hurry.
The café where Minseok works at is a quaint little place, almost jarring amidst the various high-end boutiques in Myeongdong. Chanyeol pushes the cool metal bar, and a pleasant tinkling of wind chimes greets him. He instantly spots Minseok, absorbed in the process of coffee-brewing. He strides over to the counter, suddenly feeling very self-conscious.
Minseok happens to look up and a beautiful smile spreads across his face. "You came!" The unadulterated surprise in Minseok's voice is enough to make Chanyeol's lips quirk up as well.
"Hello, hyung," Chanyeol greets with a smile. He looks around the café and sees only a smattering of people. All of them are relaxed, enjoying a cup of coffee and the nice view of Myeongdong's shopping crowd.
"This place is nice," Chanyeol hums. "It suits you."
Minseok chuckles and Chanyeol drinks in the mellifluous sound. "You can't stay here if you don't order anything, you know. We only serve customers," Minseok grins cheekily, eyebrows raised, almost as if in a challenge.
"I'll have an espresso then," Chanyeol orders gamely. Although he rarely drinks coffee (the caffeine messes up his system), he's more than willing to try a cup if only for the chance to talk to Minseok. Minseok's smile grows wider and he tells him, "Great! I'll go and make it for you now."
Chanyeol drums his fingers idly on the marble counter as Minseok starts brewing the cup. Never having professed an interest in coffee-making, Chanyeol can't help but be amazed by the way Minseok deftly grinds the coffee beans until it turns into a fine powder, then packs it into the espresso machine. He places a portafilter in the machine and a cup under the spout, and before long a robust aroma drifts through the cafe as a warm brown liquid flows out of the machine.
Chanyeol wonders how he does it. Minseok is finally done, and he places the cup on the counter with an air of finality. Chanyeol looks at the cup of coffee in awe almost as if it is a work of art (which in Chanyeol's opinion, it is.)
"Drink up! Our café only uses freshly ground coffee beans. It's different from what Starbucks gives you." Minseok grins at him, nudging the cup ever closer to Chanyeol (while nudging Chanyeol's heart ever closer to the point of infatuation.)
Chanyeol gently takes the cup and lifts it closer to his lips, taking a sip. The flavours envelope him slowly. He first tastes the caramel, then the lingering aroma of coffee beans even after he has swallowed the liquid.
"I don't usually say this, but your coffee is really good," Chanyeol tells him, wide-eyed with wonder. The cup is set back on the counter with a clink.
"What did I say." Minseok smiles into the palm of his hand.
"Maybe you make exceptional coffee."
Minseok shakes his head. "I'm a normal barista, not even the most talented one here. I've still got a lot to learn. That's why I've signed up for a barista course next month." Chanyeol leans forward slightly, inhales and discovers that Minseok smells of lavender.
Chanyeol takes one more sip, and then another―he is too inebriated with the taste of Minseok's coffee and the scent of his skin.
Minseok's phone rings then―Chanyeol is happy to note that the ringtone is DBSK's Heaven. Minseok cocks his head in askance, and Chanyeol nods. Minseok gratefully slides his finger over the screen to answer the call.
"Hello, Lu." A warm smile immediately spreads over Minseok's face. Chanyeol furrows his eyebrows at the name―he swears he has heard it before, but he can't remember who it is.
"Mmhmm," Minseok smiles indulgently. Chanyeol notices the too obvious way Minseok lights up when talking to him, or her. An ugly feeling clenches around his heart―it's weird, Chanyeol can't exactly pinpoint what it is, but seeing Minseok talk to another person so happily makes him uncomfortable. He tries to shake it off by looking away, mindlessly stirring his coffee which has already gone cold.
"In the café. I'm working." Minseok laughs, presumably at what the other has said. Chanyeol winces. He really likes Minseok's laugh, soft and dulcet, but this time adoration is mixed in jealousy. Minseok and the person on the other end of the phone talk for a few minutes more before Minseok takes the phone away from his ear and swipes to end the call.
"Who was that?" Chanyeol asks casually (or as casually as he can pretend to be, anyway.) The fire consuming him is irrational, because Minseok isn't close to him―heck, they've only met each other less than five times. It's weird that he had such a violent reaction.
"Oh, it's Luhan. You know, the keyboardist in my band? The one with doe eyes and a pretty face." Chanyeol searches through the depths of his memory and seems to recall a man with honey brown hair standing beside Minseok that day at the bar.
"He's also my boyfriend," Minseok reveals mindlessly enough but Chanyeol is frozen in shock. All he can think about is he's dating Luhan, oh God, Minseok is dating Luhan. His mind goes into overdrive thinking about what Minseok has just told him, thoughts conflicting between I should've known and why didn't he tell me earlier. Minseok is staring at him in concern but Chanyeol doesn't notice, mind filled with images of Minseok and Luhan together. The thing is, he wishes the best for Minseok and he knows he's happy with Luhan, but a part of him just wishes that Minseok could be his. That part promptly shatters into a million pieces.
"Chanyeol," Minseok says, voice laced with concern, "are you alright?" He takes a step forward and places a tentative hand on Chanyeol's shoulder, brows creasing.
"Yeah, it's nothing. I just... didn't expect you to be dating him," Chanyeol says with a careless wave of his hand, dismissing the matter.
"Well, we seem like a pretty unlikely pair, huh? But I think he makes a pretty good boyfriend." There's a fond smile playing on Minseok's lips as he talks about Luhan. Chanyeol's expression hardens just a fraction and his smile isn't as genuine as it was five minutes ago, but it stays. It stays as Minseok reminisces fondly about how they met at university―Luhan a shy, awkward transfer student and Minseok a quiet music major. It stays as Minseok tells him about the first time they held hands at a café, with shy gazes and tentative smiles. It even stays as Minseok recalls their first kiss during one of those movie marathons they had.
It's immensely difficult, but it stays.
"I guess we just got close naturally, and I can't imagine myself without him. Our relationship is so effortless that sometimes I wonder if we're even boyfriends, because we almost never fight," Minseok laughs. Chanyeol humours him by laughing along, but the sound that escapes sounds strangled and fake. Luckily Minseok doesn't notice.
Minseok suddenly remembers something in the midst of their conversation. The stool scrapes against the floor as he stands up.
"Hang on a sec, I'll be back," Minseok instructs, and Chanyeol is left to his own devices.
His phone buzzes with a message from Baekhyun, and Chanyeol snorts when he reads it, because it is so typical of him.
From: ByunBaek
How's your date with that guy going?
He quickly types in a reply.
To: ByunBaek
Stop joking around, we're not on a date. He has a boyfriend anyway.
It's barely ten seconds later when his phone lights up again. Baekhyun sure has lightning fast fingers, Chanyeol muses.
From: ByunBaek
Ooh, without the bf knowing! Such a scandalous affair! ㅋㅋㅋ
Out of the corner of his eyes, Chanyeol spots Minseok returning from the storeroom so he locks his phone and slips it in his pocket. He'll deal with Baekhyun later.
"Here you go. Thanks for lending it to me," Minseok beams as he passes Chanyeol a brown paper bag. Chanyeol opens the bag, takes out the CD and examines it, turning it from side to side and holding it up against the light. Minseok laughs because of how serious he is, but Chanyeol doesn't take it to heart. He's pleased to see that the CD is in its original condition.
"You took good care of it." Chanyeol slips the CD back into the bag, sips at his coffee.
"I promised," Minseok grins. "It was so refreshing to listen to the original CD instead of through my crappy earphones."
A mental image of Minseok dancing with the CD on full blast materialises in Chanyeol's head out of nowhere and he's trying not to laugh. "I can imagine," he suppresses a chuckle. "Even though I download music illegally all the time, I still make an effort to buy the albums."
"You know I really like your band's style of music, despite us being supposed rivals and all," Minseok confesses to him, voice lowered almost comically as if he's revealing a huge secret. "Indie music is refreshing. Don't tell anyone, I have a reputation to uphold."
"Rock music is pretty cool too," Chanyeol says it like he means it. "Even though I end up with migraines from all the head-banging."
Minseok snorts.
"And I just complimented you," he mock-sighs, shaking his head.
The wind chimes tinkle again and Minseok excuses himself with an apologetic smile to tend to the new customer. Chanyeol observes how Minseok genuinely smiles at the customer while taking his order, no fake smile plastered on his face, no pretences, nothing but warmness and friendliness.
Maybe that's what Chanyeol likes so much about him. He's real. And that's a rarity in the music scene that Chanyeol has dabbled in for as long as he can remember.
Minseok is away for about five minutes, during which Chanyeol busies himself with replying Baekhyun's message.
To: ByunBaek
I'm not dating anyone. Why don't you go worry your pretty little head about something else?
From: ByunBaek
You're so mean ㅠㅠ
To: ByunBaek
ㅋㅋㅋ serves you right ㅋ
The sound of footsteps alert Chanyeol of Minseok's arrival and he looks up, putting his phone away. His heart won't stop fluttering in his chest even when Minseok starts talking about his bandmates. He speaks of Yixing, who is good-natured and kind; Zitao, who builds walls around himself but is really soft and amiable once you get to know him; and of Luhan, whose smiles and laughter lights up Minseok's days.
Chanyeol thinks that perhaps it's a good thing that Minseok has a boyfriend―it'll remind him of how unattainable Minseok is and how he shouldn't be pining over him in the first place and how the mere act of seeing him is breaking all the rules. But from the way his heart is twisting itself in his chest, he thinks maybe not.
"Hey," Minseok says, gentler this time and Chanyeol pretends that this soft tone is reserved for him and him alone, "you okay?"
"Yeah," he smiles quickly, pushing out all insecurities from his mind, "whywouldn't I be?"
Minseok smiles at him and his world tilts on its axis.
They spend the rest of the afternoon talking about mundane things like how Chanyeol always loses his socks ("I swear they just disappear by themselves!") or how Minseok is a light sleeper who wakes up at the slightest noise. The warm afternoon sun draws contrasting patterns on the floor, and the occasional tinkle of wind chimes lull the two into comfortable chatter.
When he leaves with the brown paper bag tucked underneath his arm, Chanyeol has fallen a little more in love.
They become a sort-of routine after that. Chanyeol goes to the café when he's not too busy, and Minseok pops into the CD shop from time to time. In between meetups with Minseok, Chanyeol and his band practise hard for the Jisan Valley Rock Festival, and they conveniently forget about Chanyeol's "date". All they talk about when they meet is the festival.
He mentions it in passing to Minseok one day and the latter gives him a surprised "Oh?", eyebrows raised and mouth wide.
"You've heard of it too?" Chanyeol asks, pleasantly surprised.
"No, obviously I have not heard of the biggest music festival in Seoul." Minseok rolls his eyes.
Chanyeol laughs off Minseok's sarcasm. "Are you participating, then?"
"Actually, yes, we are."
"I'll confess, Baekhyun only signed us up because of the prize money," Chanyeol chuckles as he recounts how Baekhyun had burst in with a half-crazed expression on his face. Chanyeol, however, is open to attending any sort of music-related event, whether there was a prize or not. He, after all, only wants to share his love for music with everyone.
"100 million won is a lot of money, though," Minseok agrees. "Have you guys started practising for it?" Chanyeol nods. "How's it going?"
"We're playing a self-composed song, and then a cover of Nell's The Day Before," Chanyeol says, drumming his fingers on the table. "We're still trying to practise to make our stage presence better. And sometimes Baekhyundoesn't hit his high notes. So," he laughs a little nervously, "we're still working at the kinks."
Minseok smiles knowingly. He takes a large gulp of his coffee, and Chanyeol watches his Adam's apple bob up and down. "Reinvent is performing two self-composed songs. Yixing is really good at composing."
"I liked that song you performed at Domino. He's really talented," Chanyeol affirms.
"He actually composed over thirty songs for this festival. We thought they were all great, but he refused to select any of them, working on new songs until he found a few which he was satisfied with." Minseok recalls fondly the memory of his hard-working bandmate. "Sometimes I look at him and I feel horribly inadequate."
Chanyeol hastens to deny it, shaking his head so vigorously that his hair gets messed up and sticks out in all directions. Minseok chuckles at Chanyeol's antics, muttering something that sounds suspiciously like "you're so cute" before reaching out to smooth his hair back into place. Chanyeol feels like there are phantom fingers wrapping around his heart, squeezing tight and leaving him breathless.
After learning that Minseok's band is also participating in the festival, Chanyeol works doubly hard at his band practices. Not just because he wants to impress Minseok, but also because he wants to show him that he's put in a lot of effort and he really wants to win. Chanyeol's always needed to prove himself.
His bandmates notice this change, and they welcome it with open arms. Chanyeol, who wasn't the most perfectionist one of them (it used to be Baekhyun) now requests for hour-long extensions to their practice sessions when he thinks they're not good enough. And even on days when they don't have practice, Chanyeol still plays his acoustic guitar in his living room, practising his songs and irritating his neighbours, until they inevitably complain about the noise so he has no choice but to stop. Either that, or his fingers cramp up so he can't strum the strings anymore.
"Wow, Chanyeol-hyung, what made you all slave-driver these days? You used to be the most chill one out of all of us," remarks Jongin, after Chanyeol makes a few tactless remarks about their standards.
"What happened to 'music is all about enjoying yourself'?" Sehun asks, rolling his eyes. Chanyeol grits his teeth. He has no patience to deal with his bandmates' tempers now.
"We're not good enough," Chanyeol spits out, eyes blazing like fire as he wipes the beads of sweat threatening to drip into his eyes. His bangs are drenched, but he continues fingering the guitar strings mechanically.
"Chanyeol, stop, we need to take a break," Baekhyun pleads with him. "We've been practising non-stop for the past three hours and we're tired."
"Well then. If you guys are tired, you can rest. I'm not," Chanyeol replies, wiping the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve.
The rest of the members stare at each other helplessly. There's the most worry in Baekhyun's eyes, though, when he tells Chanyeol not to overwork himself and receives no reply in return.
"You're a good kid, Chanyeol," Minseok tells him with sincerity. "Good luck in the upcoming festival. Do your best. Wow the crowd." He thumps Chanyeol's back, twice, before breaking out into a smile. It's the kind that Chanyeol has grown to love, with curved eyes, lifted cheekbones, and pink gums.
"I will," Chanyeol answers simply. "You too, power vocal-hyung," he teases. Minseok huffs in mock annoyance, complaining about youngsters these days.
Inevitably, they find out, like Chanyeol always feared they would.
"What were you thinking, Chanyeol? Going out with someone from a rival band behind our backs?" Baekhyun sounds so hurt and so betrayed, that Chanyeol feels like he's been punched in the gut. Jongin immediately starts questioning him about where his loyalties lie, and Chanyeol feels guilty, to both Minseok and his bandmates.
"You lied to us, you fucking lied to us, hyung. Are we not your best friends? We trusted you," Jongin says bitterly. He mutters a how could you? under his breath, quiet but Chanyeol still hears it, loud and clear. He looks down at his shoes, not feeling quite brave enough to make eye contact with his bandmates.
"How long have you been seeing him?" Sehun asks quietly. He's the only one who hasn't lashed out at Chanyeol, but betrayal flickers in his eyes.
"I've only seen him a few times. Guys, I know you're mad at me, and I know you have all the right in the world to, but let me explain. I didn'twant to like him, it just happened―"
"Well no shit," Jongin muttered rudely under his breath.
"―and I swear we're just friends. We haven't done anything. Besides," he adds morosely, "he has a boyfriend."
Baekhyun exhales, long and resigned. He pinches the bridge of his nose and massages it, the way he does when he's trying hard to control his temper.
"Oh, so now we're supposed to pity you?" Jongin sneers. "Well this is really fucked up."
Sehun presses his lips together into a thin line. "Shut up, Jongin," he scowls, patience wearing thin.
"Look, Chanyeol," Baekhyun starts, and the tone of his voice makes Chanyeol lift his head up and actually meet his eyes, albeit fearfully. Baekhyun's a fuse and he's terrifying when he blows up. "I'm glad this hasn't progressed beyond a one-sided crush, but I don't want it to stay that way. Don't meet him anymore, okay? Keep messages and calls to a minimum. Make him think that you forgot him―in which case is what is actually gonna happen―and gradually you guys cut off contact altogether. Okay?"
When Chanyeol doesn't respond immediately, Baekhyun sighs and says in a much gentler voice. "This is what's best for us, Chanyeol-ah." Chanyeol swallows, but nods resignedly.
"Okay," he agrees.
2 missed calls and 11 new messages.
Minseok
He skims through the first few lines of the message that just recently popped up. Chanyeol sighs, deleting the notifications and turning off his phone. It's only been Day 2 of Avoid Kim Minseok but as determined as Chanyeol is to forget him, Minseok seems equally bent on doing the exact opposite. He can almost picture Minseok's worried expression, eyes wide and brows furrowed and everything just hurt. He feels like a complete asshole but it's not like he can help it.
Chanyeol wants so badly to be able to talk to Minseok like old times, when they were actually friends before Chanyeol's feelings and reality came in and ruined everything. Instead he steels himself to delete their conversation history, their call history, almost as if doing so will eventually delete Kim Minseok from his mind.
Chanyeol laughs hollowly. He knows it won't, but what harm is there to try?
Eventually the calls and messages stop. A part of Chanyeol's heart stops too.
The day of the music festival arrives sooner than Chanyeol would've liked. They arrive at a budget hotel in Yongin the day before, practising till the dead of night until they finally flop down on their beds, too exhausted to even move. For the first time in a long while, Chanyeol's exhausted but content. He just prays that everything will happen as they've practised. They fall asleep within minutes.
In the morning, Baekhyun drinks honey lemon to soothe his throat, sore from endless hours of practice. He's tempted to open his mouth and break out into song again, but a warning look from Sehun stops him from doing so.
"Hyung, you need to protect your voice," Sehun reminds him. "We need it in best condition later."
"Right," Baekhyun sheepishly rubs the back of his neck. "I promise not to sing till later."
Jongin, meanwhile, plays a slow, steady rhythm on his drum set, the occasional sound of the cymbals providing a steady beat. Sehun does simple scales on the keyboard, taking care not to overwork his fingers. They're still stiff from yesterday and the last thing he wants is for them to cramp up and miss a note. Meanwhile, Chanyeol strums a few basic chords on his guitar.
And then, Baekhyun takes one glance at the clock and says quietly, "It's time."
next →
Pairing(s): Xiuyeol, Xiuhan
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 14341
Summary: Minseok has a boyfriend and sings for a rival band. And Chanyeol is kind of in love with him.
It's 8 o' clock, the night just barely descending upon Seoul as the street lights flicker on, illuminating cars and passers-by. And yet, in a nondescript downtown bar, people are swarming in by the dozens. Domino is nothing to be amazed at―faded sofas, wooden tables and chairs, and a few pool tables here and there. The centrepiece is the elevated stage in the middle of the bar, where the crowd is congregating at tonight.
It is as crowded as it can get. Everyone who's a fan of the underground indie scene in Seoul wants to get a glimpse of Toned Grey, the rising star of Seoul's band scene. Even though they're young, all of them below thirty years of age, they are still acclaimed for their quality music. All of them take part in music composition and production, and they already have an established sound that sets them apart from most rookie bands in the scene. It also helps that other than being incredibly talented, each of the members also have the looks to match, which often leads to people joke that they're "too good to be true". They also have an established fanbase, made up of mostly teenage girls who regularly attend their gigs around Seoul.
There are girls carrying enormous fanboards, with the members' names written on them, some splayed in blinding neon colours while others painstakingly done using LED lights. While a majority are here for Toned Grey, there is a considerable number here for Reinvent, a newly formed rock band that quickly rose to the forefront of the Seoul music scene.
At 8.30 pm, the MC strides out to thunderous applause.
"Welcome, everyone, to Domino. Are you guys excited for the bands that will be playing tonight?" he shouts, and the audience reciprocate with loud screams and claps.
"Glad to see that all of you are hyped up! Tonight we will have four bands lined up, so be prepared for a night of awesome music!"
The members of Toned Grey are lounging in the VIP room (which, in reality, is just a normal room with an added TV screen) waiting for their turn to go on stage. As expected, they're the grand finale.
"Baekhyun-hyung, please make sure your voice doesn't crack tonight. We've got lots of people watching us," Sehun says when Baekhyun is applying his eyeliner, and it catches the latter off guard.
"That was one time!" Baekhyun wails. He fumes at the uneven line in the mirror. "And you've ruined my eyeliner."
Chanyeol pets the lead singer sympathetically on the back. "Don't mind him, Baek. You'll do well tonight. All of us will."
"Hyungs! The performances are starting!" Jongin shushes all of them from the sofa. They watch from the TV in their lounge as the MC announces Reinvent, who are greeted with thunderous applause and cheers from their gaggle of supporters.
The band members make their way onstage and start setting up. A tall, built man carries his drum kit as the other members plug in amplifiers and tested their mikes. Reinvent, unlike Toned Grey, had a lot more male fans in their demographics. Although Toned Grey and Reinvent play music of different genres, it's hard for them not to be compared as both have overwhelmingly large fanbases, both are made up of good-looking young men under the age of thirty, and both write great music. Chanyeol recalls when Dispatch started reporting them as "the Reinvent of indie music" and Reinvent as "the Toned Grey of rock" and he laughs, more out of bemusement than anything. Although being subjected to comparison on so many levels, Chanyeol actually doesn't really know much about Reinvent, other than the fact that they're rivals.
A rather short blond takes the mic from the MC and speaks into it. "Hello everyone, we're Reinvent. I'm the lead singer, Xiumin, and we have Luhan on keyboard, Yixing on guitar and Zitao on drums." The volume of the cheers he receives is phenomenal. Chanyeol, for some reason, can't take his eyes off him. His hair is spiked and his eyeliner can rival Baekhyun's with the sheer amount that he has applied. He has round but angled cheeks, and when he smiles his pink gums show.
"Their lead is pretty hot," Sehun remarks, voicing out Chanyeol's thoughts. Chanyeol gulps, throat dry.
"Y-Yeah," he stutters out in agreement.
"Today, we have quite a number of songs lined up for you, so we hope you like them. Our first song is a cover of Maroon 5'sMisery. Then we have our own song entitled Where Are You, composed by our very talented Yixing. And lastly we'll be playing Never Forget, which fans will remember as our debut song. Thank you!" Xiumin says, waving to the crowd one last time before turning to make eye contact with his members. Their drummer Zitao nods in reply and hits the cymbals. Heavy twangs from the electronic guitar start sounding, guitarist Yixing losing himself to the music. Chanyeol nods his head to the addictive beat. Rock isn't really his genre, but he can't say he doesn't like it.
After the intro, Xiumin takes a deep breath and starts to sing.
Chanyeol freezes. Xiumin's voice isn't clear or soothing; rather, it has an oddly attractive huskiness that matches well with the tone of the song. The keyboards accompany Xiumin's voice perfectly as he belts out a high note. He isn't the most talented singer Chanyeol has heard, but he oozes confidence and the gaze that he sends to the audience through his half-lidded lashes does weird things to Chanyeol's heart, which starts to flip a little out of control. He's a little bewildered by all the feelings that he's experiencing―he never felt anything like it before. Xiumin looks straight at the camera through kohl-lined eyes and Chanyeol bites his lips to stop his inappropriate thoughts. There's too much sex appeal for a guy that tiny wearing a black leather jacket and ripped jeans. Chanyeol gulps and looks away, not knowing why his throat feels dry all of a sudden.
Reinvent perform the other two songs and Chanyeol's blown away by both of them. Xiumin's charisma―how he rolls his hips subtly to the rhythm, how his tongue darts out to wet his lips ever so often―rivets Chanyeol's attention on him and he conveniently forgets about the rest of his band.
"Thank you guys for being a great audience, this has been Reinvent!" Xiumin says when the beats of the last song fade out, and he smiles and waves, the whole band standing up to bow. By the time they exit the stage, all Chanyeol can remember is a pair of pretty eyes and a gummy smile.
"They're not bad," Baekhyun appraises after their performance ends. "I have to say, they're worthy of being our rival."
"Yeah, they were... pretty good," Chanyeol hastens to agree. He watches the following performances half-heartedly, not even hearing the next two bands even though they perform to the best of their ability. His mind is too preoccupied with thinking about Xiumin. Even though he knows it's practically a crime to like a band rival, he still can't help replaying his perfect smiles over and over again in his head.
This doesn't bode very well.
Before long it's Toned Grey's turn and Chanyeol doesn't even realise it until Sehun yanks him out of his chair.
"Don't make me do it again," the younger warns. "You're heavy, hyung."
They do final touch-ups to their makeup, and before long they hear the MC announce their band. They walk confidently on stage. They've done this countless times. They will own this.
"Hello everyone! We're Toned Grey!" Baekhyun speaks into the mic, wearing one of his brightest smiles. Their fans don't let them down as they cheer raucously while waving their banners around. "Today we'll be playing three songs. The first is Cover Up," a few fans squeal because it's one of their most famous songs, "the second is a cover of Urban Zakapa's Walk Backwards, and the last will be a crowd favourite, Wings and Tears."
As Baekhyun introduces their setlist, Chanyeol wonders why his heart seems to be jumping out of his throat. He's unusually nervous tonight. Without warning, they're given the cue to start and Chanyeol's fingers turn cold.
Baekhyun belts out the first few notes, then Chanyeol joins in by strumming on his guitar. Thankfully, he can still play without a hitch. Fangirls start chanting their names and Chanyeol revels in the sensation, reminded of why he loves performing so much. The adrenaline rush he gets is thrilling and more than enough to keep him on high for hours. He momentarily forgets about the boy with the kohl-lined eyes and loses himself in the music.
"Park Chanyeol!" A fangirl screams particularly loudly, and Chanyeol turns his head in the direction of the scream to spot a girl waving her Chanyeol banner extremely vigorously. He responds by winking in her direction, and the fans in his line of sight collectively start squealing. The fangirl, now shy, is hiding her face in her palms.
Chanyeol chuckles.Cute.
They play the other two songs without difficulty, Chanyeol, Jongin and Sehun harmonising for Baekhyun during the choruses. Chanyeol has a few lines of rap in Wings and Tears, and he looks at the fangirl from before while performing it. From the way she's hiding her face, he thinks she's about to cry of happiness.
"And that's it for tonight! Thank you all for coming and hope you enjoyed our performance!" Chanyeol hears Baekhyun say and they all bow before leaving the stage in a file.
"Great job everyone," Jongin is sincere with his compliments, and they high-five each other to congratulate themselves on another gig well done.
Out of the corner of his eye, Chanyeol spots Minseok backstage, talking to his fellow bandmates and laughing. His tongue darts out in nervousness, wetting his lips. Chanyeol's drawn to him like a magnet, seeking him out involuntarily. Yet, he finds it odd that he's nervous―after all, Chanyeol has never experienced difficulty approaching anyone before, being the extrovert that he is.
He convinces himself that he's just going for some friendly conversation between peers in the same line of occupation. Reinvent's three other Chinese members eye him curiously, but Minseok has his back turned and he doesn't notice as Chanyeol approaches them.
"Hi," Chanyeol says. Minseok turns at the unfamiliar voice and his eyes widen comically. Chanyeol finds it endearing and overwhelmingly cute.
"Hello," he responds after a beat. Somehow his bandmates take that as their cue to slip away, leaving Chanyeol and Minseok standing awkwardly in the middle of the waiting room. Chanyeol shifts on the heels of his feet.
"You're Chanyeol, right? Park Chanyeol, guitarist of Toned Grey." It's not even a question, but a statement.
Chanyeol lifts an eyebrow, pleasantly surprised. "Yeah." How did you know?
"You're pretty famous. Whole of Seoul music scene knows you." Minseok says almost like he's heard the question, unasked, on the tip of Chanyeol's tongue. It feels good to be recognised and admired, but Chanyeol feels a special sense of accomplishment when it's Minseok, of all people, that praise him. He feels slightly airy.
After a beat, Minseok sticks out his right hand. "Anyway, I'm Kim Minseok and I'm 25 years old. Xiumin is my stage name," Minseok explains.
If Minseok hadn't said so himself, Chanyeol would have a hard time believing that the man in front of him was any older than himself. Chanyeol takes the outstretched hand and shakes it. Minseok's grip is firm and Chanyeol really likes the warmth of his fingers.
"I'm Park Chanyeol, 23. Not that you don't know it already but," he's blabbering, oh God, why is he blabbering, "it's always good to formally introduce myself! Nice to meet you, Minseok-hyung." He smiles, teeth and all, and Minseok's lips lift up at the corners.
"I think you sing well. Was pretty amazed by your performance, actually," Chanyeol tells him when his hand drops back to his side.
"Thank you," Minseok grins. His gums are clean and his smile is a little crooked. Chanyeol must admit that he's very attractive.
He hears Jongin calling "Chanyeol-hyung" from the other side of the room and his facial features pinch.
"Sorry, I need to go." Smiling apologetically, he explains. Minseok shakes his head. "It's alright, it was nice talking to you."
As Chanyeol makes his way back, he innately curses Jongin and his impeccable timing.
When's he not too busy doing gigs or practising for them, Chanyeol works part-time at a quaint little CD shop tucked into a corner of Insadong. He loves music as much as life itself, so it's not surprising that both his jobs involve music. To him, music is an art, a way of expression, but at the same time it is so much more than that. It's his blood and soul, and he loves the way pure exhilaration courses through his veins when he listens to good music. Each note, each note, is like a word in a good book, weaving together to tell a spectacular story. Chanyeol loves it.
He's closing up shop when the wind chimes at the door tinkle, alerting him of a customer. Chanyeol looks up, about to give an apologetic Sorry, we're closed for the day, but maybe you could come back tomorrow when he realises, with a start, who has entered. The man is just as he remembers him―petite, with roundish cheeks and crescent-shaped eyes. He stares at Chanyeol for a bit, before breaking out into a smile as he recognises the man before him.
"Oh, it's you. Hi," Minseok greets.
"Uh, hi," Chanyeol says intelligently. Minseok's not dressed in anything fancy, wearing only a simple hoodie and washed-out jeans. He still looks stunning, though. Chanyeol would probably think that even if he shows up wearing a trash bag.
"Are you closing up shop?" Minseok inquires while his eyes roam around the shelves and shelves of CDs and albums. Chanyeol nods dumbly.
"I'm sorry, but you'll have to come again another time," he says, apology genuine in his voice.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I saw the sign said 'Closed' but I thought you'd maybe let me just find what I was looking for, you know. I'll be quick." Minseok looks at him with hopeful eyes and Chanyeol doesn't see the harm in it, so he agrees.
"Thanks a lot." Minseok smiles before heading towards the Local Singers section, scanning the shelves for something.
"Found it!" he exclaims triumphantly not a minute later, holding an exquisitely packaged album in his hands. Chanyeol peers over his shoulder.
"You like DBSK?" he asks. Minseok purses his lips and nods.
"Yeah, I do. I think their music is really good. How about you?" He clutches the album to his chest, almost as if he's afraid he'd drop it.
"I like them too, I think they're one of the classics of Korean music," Chanyeol shares honestly.
Tension seeps out of Minseok's shoulders after that, and he relaxes. "That's a relief. My bandmates all judge me because they say DBSK is overrated and packaged for teenage girls," he chuckles. Chanyeol thinks he has a nice laugh.
"I feel you completely. My bandmates complain I'm too mainstream, and they laugh at my collection of SNSD albums," he laments, recalling how Sehun and Jongin always riled him up over his music taste. Just because he is in an indie band doesn't mean he has to like hipster music! He shares that with Minseok and the latter is amused.
Minseok laughs and walks over to the counter, with Chanyeol following him. Chanyeol scans the purchase and there's a crinkling sound as he bags the album.
"Will that be all?" Chanyeol asks, as he hands Minseok a bag with the album in it.
"Yeah," the latter replies. "Sorry about coming in so late again." He doesn't turn immediately to leave, though, instead pursing his lips pensively. Chanyeol wonders what he's thinking about.
"Well, see you around." In the end, Minseok waves. "And thanks again for letting me in the shop!" He calls out before pushing open the door and exiting the shop.
The wind chimes tinkle softly as Chanyeol watches him till he's out of sight.
At first, Chanyeol tries to dismiss these thoughts, conflicted by what it would mean to him if he acknowledged them. Perhaps his attraction towards the lead singer of their rival band was just a passing infatuation. It would do no good to dwell upon these feelings when all they did was to consume him and envelope him in distress.
He knows, better than anyone, how fatal it is to fall for a member of a rival band. Jealousy and suspicion would inevitably ensue, and Chanyeol didn't want to subject himself and his bandmates to that kind of misery. It simply isn't worth it.
When Jongin asks him what's wrong, Chanyeol simply shrugs because really, how can you explain your feelings to someone when you can't even figure them out yourself? Jongin gives him an odd look, doesn't say a word and leaves, but Chanyeol feels guilty because he's keeping something from his bandmates and it's not right.
He stuffs his feelings away into a dusty little corner of his heart, and prays that he'll forget them.
Chanyeol's doing a pretty good job of it until he runs into Minseok, again.
Their second meeting is when Minseok comes in a week later. Chanyeol glances at the clock and notes that it's 15 minutes before closing time.
"Hi again, Chanyeol," Minseok greets with a bright smile. "I've been trying to find this album everywhere, but so far all the places I've been to don't sell it. So I thought of this shop," he explains, while craning his neck to search up and down the shelves.
"What album is it? I can help you find it."
"It's H.O.T's debut album, We Hate All Kinds of Violence," Minseok tells him while rifling through the various albums on the shelves. "Looks like you don't have it either." It's hard for Minseok to hide the disappointment surfacing on his features.
"I came here because your shop has one of the largest collection of CDs by far."
Chanyeol frowns, tapping a finger against his chin, trying to recall whether the album is still available. "Itis a very old album, and all the copies were sold out over a decade ago, and they stopped reprinting any new ones."
Minseok doesn't hide how crestfallen he is as his mouth droops. "I know, but I was hoping someone still had a copy," he pouts.
Chanyeol actually knows someone who does. His only copy of We Hate All Kinds of Violence was purchased online in an auction for about ten times the original price of the album. It was a steal. It's his most prized possession, and he refuses to let any of his friends so much as touch it, fearing they would dirty the album. After all, it is an old copy, one of the first edition prints. He had been elated for a couple of days after getting the album, and he couldn't bear the thought of giving it to someone else.
"You must really like H.O.T a lot, then," Chanyeol can't help but remark as he notes how disappointment is written all over Minseok's features.
"Yeah, I'm trying to amass a collection of all their album releases to date. But I can't get my hands on this particular one. I've kind of given up, to be honest." Minseok shrugs, but his face betrays his real feelings.
Chanyeol thinks long and hard, and promptly decides on something. "Actually, I have a copy at home. I could still lend it to you, if you want?" he offers. He doesn't miss the way Minseok's eyes instantly light up.
"Really? You'd do that?" Minseok gushes and Chanyeol swears his eyes are sparkling. He thought it was only possible with anime and manga characters.
"Yeah, but you have to return it unspoiled!" he says sternly. "Not so much as a scratch, or you'll have to pay for it."
"Definitely. I can't believe my luck though, thank you so much!" Minseok enthuses, looking at Chanyeol as if he just saved his life. Chanyeol finds it all very endearing.
Chanyeol tells Minseok to wait and he goes into the room at the back of the store, before coming out with a paper bag with the album inside. "Here you go," he says as he passes the album to Minseok, and it's nice to see Minseok's face light up in a brilliant smile as he takes it.
"Thank you so much!" Minseok repeats, again and again until Chanyeol's laughing.
"I get it, you don't have to thank me so many times," Chanyeol says jokingly, and Minseok laughs. Their conversation dies down and the shop returns to its original state of quiet.
"You know..." Minseok begins quietly, hesitant and almost unsure of what he's about to say, which makes Chanyeol perk his ears. "Maybe you could drop by the café I work in sometime? It's in Myeongdong and it'll be nice to see you there. I could return the album to me then," he suggests, looking at Chanyeol cautiously to gauge his reaction. Chanyeol smiles widely, pearly teeth showing. "Of course, I'd love to."
There's no stopping the grin that spreads across Minseok's cheeks. He whips out his phone and looks at Chanyeol expectantly. Chanyeol cocks his head in confusion.
"Phone number?" he asks. Oh. Chanyeol dutifully recites it, the familiar string of digits rolling off the tip of his tongue. Minseok sticks his tongue out a little as he saves it, a little action which Chanyeol doesn't miss. Cute, he thinks.
"Now I'll call your phone so you have my number." He presses the call button on his phone and DBSK's Mirotic suddenly starts playing, noise amplified tenfold in the quiet shop.
Chanyeol winces but Minseok just stares at him, wide-eyed, before breaking out into a knowing grin.
"Well, well, well," he says, "looks like this marks the start of a beautiful friendship."
Chanyeol smiles as well, feeling something warm and fuzzy in his chest. He hopes it is.
Chanyeol is texting Minseok to arrange a time for him to go to the café,Sehun is boredly picking at his fingernails and Jongin reads the menu for the third time. There'ssoju already ordered on the table, but no one's drinking it yet. Baekhyun is fashionably late, as always. It's Friday night and as per tradition, all of Toned Grey (with the exception of Baekhyun) arrive at 7 pm at a ramen restaurant for dinner. No one really knows how this tradition started or why it's a ramen restaurant of all places, but ramen is delicious and that's enough of a reason.
"Guess what, guys," Baekhyun trills as he pushes open the glass doors, eyes shining with excitement. Chanyeol checks his phone. 7.15 pm. Not one of his worst records.
"What," Sehun says disinterestedly as Jongin glances over at Baekhyun. Chanyeol perks up in his seat, phone forgotten as he listens attentively to what the eldest has to say.
Baekhyun slides into his seat next to Chanyeol. "I signed us up for the Jisan Valley Rock Festival. We'll be competing against other bands and singers, and the winner gets to take home 100 million won!" Baekhyun announces happily, arms waving around like he always does when he's especially excited. None of them notice the other diners staring at them angrily.
Chanyeol's jaw drops while Sehun and Jongin stare at Baekhyun, goggle-eyed. Baekhyun frowns. "What are you people staring at? I know my face is handsome, but this is really creepy."
And with Baekhyun's dose of narcissism, the rest revert back to their old selves, Sehuntsking and muttering something about how Baekhyun-hyung needs a reality check. Baekhyun, of course, pretends not to hear it as he pours soju into each of their mugs.
"Dude. 100 million won is a whole lot of money. If we win..." Jongin trails off, too busy thinking of the various wonderful possibilities to even bother finishing his sentence.
"First thing, I'll move out of my stinky dorm I share with my roommate. And buy a penthouse and a limousine," Sehun starts fantasising, already grinning widely at the sheer thought of having so much money.
Chanyeol smiles, liking the familiar feeling of all of them working together.
"Yeah," Chanyeol speaks up with determination. "Let's win this."
"Cheers!" Baekhyun yells, and the four clink their glasses together. They spend the rest of dinner discussing how to spend their windfall over ramen and soju. Sehun and Baekhyun build castles in the air, suggesting impractical things like buying a penthouse in America and going to Antarctica to see the penguins. Maybe it's the alcohol, but soon enough everything around Chanyeol fades into this soothing, familiar buzz.
"Are you guys free for practice this Saturday?" Jongin asks. Baekhyun and Sehun nod immediately, while Chanyeol hesitates. He's arranged to see Minseok then.
Sehun is the quickest to pick up on Chanyeol's change in expression. "Why, hyung, do you have something on?"
"Uh, I'm meeting someone..." He trails off, unsure of what else to say. He hasn't planned to tell his bandmates so soon (after all, there's nothing going on between Minseok and him, and telling his bandmates is akin to admitting that there is.) Perhaps he can tell them after, prepare a little speech in his head and brace himself for how they're going to react. He's not ready to say it now.
"Ooh, Chanyeol's going on a date! It's been so long, I thought you were going to get blue balls," Baekhyun cackles loudly and Chanyeol smacks him on the head. Baekhyun's big mouth is his worst fault.
"Who is it, hyung?" Jongin eyes him in interest. Chanyeol hems and haws but doesn't say it.
"Too shy to tell us? But we've been your friends since forever!" Baekhyun pouts. "There's nothing you ought to be keeping from us."
"It's not even a date in the first place," Chanyeol murmurs. "We're just... acquaintances."
"It's fine, we won't push it. But you have to tell us after you meet him," Sehun concedes, finds a middle ground that Chanyeol is grateful for.
"Alright, I will," he promises.
Chanyeol spends an hour deciding what to wear, even though he's aware that it's only a casual meeting. When he finally settles on a pale blue shirt and faded jeans it's almost five. He rushes out of his apartment in a hurry.
The café where Minseok works at is a quaint little place, almost jarring amidst the various high-end boutiques in Myeongdong. Chanyeol pushes the cool metal bar, and a pleasant tinkling of wind chimes greets him. He instantly spots Minseok, absorbed in the process of coffee-brewing. He strides over to the counter, suddenly feeling very self-conscious.
Minseok happens to look up and a beautiful smile spreads across his face. "You came!" The unadulterated surprise in Minseok's voice is enough to make Chanyeol's lips quirk up as well.
"Hello, hyung," Chanyeol greets with a smile. He looks around the café and sees only a smattering of people. All of them are relaxed, enjoying a cup of coffee and the nice view of Myeongdong's shopping crowd.
"This place is nice," Chanyeol hums. "It suits you."
Minseok chuckles and Chanyeol drinks in the mellifluous sound. "You can't stay here if you don't order anything, you know. We only serve customers," Minseok grins cheekily, eyebrows raised, almost as if in a challenge.
"I'll have an espresso then," Chanyeol orders gamely. Although he rarely drinks coffee (the caffeine messes up his system), he's more than willing to try a cup if only for the chance to talk to Minseok. Minseok's smile grows wider and he tells him, "Great! I'll go and make it for you now."
Chanyeol drums his fingers idly on the marble counter as Minseok starts brewing the cup. Never having professed an interest in coffee-making, Chanyeol can't help but be amazed by the way Minseok deftly grinds the coffee beans until it turns into a fine powder, then packs it into the espresso machine. He places a portafilter in the machine and a cup under the spout, and before long a robust aroma drifts through the cafe as a warm brown liquid flows out of the machine.
Chanyeol wonders how he does it. Minseok is finally done, and he places the cup on the counter with an air of finality. Chanyeol looks at the cup of coffee in awe almost as if it is a work of art (which in Chanyeol's opinion, it is.)
"Drink up! Our café only uses freshly ground coffee beans. It's different from what Starbucks gives you." Minseok grins at him, nudging the cup ever closer to Chanyeol (while nudging Chanyeol's heart ever closer to the point of infatuation.)
Chanyeol gently takes the cup and lifts it closer to his lips, taking a sip. The flavours envelope him slowly. He first tastes the caramel, then the lingering aroma of coffee beans even after he has swallowed the liquid.
"I don't usually say this, but your coffee is really good," Chanyeol tells him, wide-eyed with wonder. The cup is set back on the counter with a clink.
"What did I say." Minseok smiles into the palm of his hand.
"Maybe you make exceptional coffee."
Minseok shakes his head. "I'm a normal barista, not even the most talented one here. I've still got a lot to learn. That's why I've signed up for a barista course next month." Chanyeol leans forward slightly, inhales and discovers that Minseok smells of lavender.
Chanyeol takes one more sip, and then another―he is too inebriated with the taste of Minseok's coffee and the scent of his skin.
Minseok's phone rings then―Chanyeol is happy to note that the ringtone is DBSK's Heaven. Minseok cocks his head in askance, and Chanyeol nods. Minseok gratefully slides his finger over the screen to answer the call.
"Hello, Lu." A warm smile immediately spreads over Minseok's face. Chanyeol furrows his eyebrows at the name―he swears he has heard it before, but he can't remember who it is.
"Mmhmm," Minseok smiles indulgently. Chanyeol notices the too obvious way Minseok lights up when talking to him, or her. An ugly feeling clenches around his heart―it's weird, Chanyeol can't exactly pinpoint what it is, but seeing Minseok talk to another person so happily makes him uncomfortable. He tries to shake it off by looking away, mindlessly stirring his coffee which has already gone cold.
"In the café. I'm working." Minseok laughs, presumably at what the other has said. Chanyeol winces. He really likes Minseok's laugh, soft and dulcet, but this time adoration is mixed in jealousy. Minseok and the person on the other end of the phone talk for a few minutes more before Minseok takes the phone away from his ear and swipes to end the call.
"Who was that?" Chanyeol asks casually (or as casually as he can pretend to be, anyway.) The fire consuming him is irrational, because Minseok isn't close to him―heck, they've only met each other less than five times. It's weird that he had such a violent reaction.
"Oh, it's Luhan. You know, the keyboardist in my band? The one with doe eyes and a pretty face." Chanyeol searches through the depths of his memory and seems to recall a man with honey brown hair standing beside Minseok that day at the bar.
"He's also my boyfriend," Minseok reveals mindlessly enough but Chanyeol is frozen in shock. All he can think about is he's dating Luhan, oh God, Minseok is dating Luhan. His mind goes into overdrive thinking about what Minseok has just told him, thoughts conflicting between I should've known and why didn't he tell me earlier. Minseok is staring at him in concern but Chanyeol doesn't notice, mind filled with images of Minseok and Luhan together. The thing is, he wishes the best for Minseok and he knows he's happy with Luhan, but a part of him just wishes that Minseok could be his. That part promptly shatters into a million pieces.
"Chanyeol," Minseok says, voice laced with concern, "are you alright?" He takes a step forward and places a tentative hand on Chanyeol's shoulder, brows creasing.
"Yeah, it's nothing. I just... didn't expect you to be dating him," Chanyeol says with a careless wave of his hand, dismissing the matter.
"Well, we seem like a pretty unlikely pair, huh? But I think he makes a pretty good boyfriend." There's a fond smile playing on Minseok's lips as he talks about Luhan. Chanyeol's expression hardens just a fraction and his smile isn't as genuine as it was five minutes ago, but it stays. It stays as Minseok reminisces fondly about how they met at university―Luhan a shy, awkward transfer student and Minseok a quiet music major. It stays as Minseok tells him about the first time they held hands at a café, with shy gazes and tentative smiles. It even stays as Minseok recalls their first kiss during one of those movie marathons they had.
It's immensely difficult, but it stays.
"I guess we just got close naturally, and I can't imagine myself without him. Our relationship is so effortless that sometimes I wonder if we're even boyfriends, because we almost never fight," Minseok laughs. Chanyeol humours him by laughing along, but the sound that escapes sounds strangled and fake. Luckily Minseok doesn't notice.
Minseok suddenly remembers something in the midst of their conversation. The stool scrapes against the floor as he stands up.
"Hang on a sec, I'll be back," Minseok instructs, and Chanyeol is left to his own devices.
His phone buzzes with a message from Baekhyun, and Chanyeol snorts when he reads it, because it is so typical of him.
From: ByunBaek
How's your date with that guy going?
He quickly types in a reply.
To: ByunBaek
Stop joking around, we're not on a date. He has a boyfriend anyway.
It's barely ten seconds later when his phone lights up again. Baekhyun sure has lightning fast fingers, Chanyeol muses.
From: ByunBaek
Ooh, without the bf knowing! Such a scandalous affair! ㅋㅋㅋ
Out of the corner of his eyes, Chanyeol spots Minseok returning from the storeroom so he locks his phone and slips it in his pocket. He'll deal with Baekhyun later.
"Here you go. Thanks for lending it to me," Minseok beams as he passes Chanyeol a brown paper bag. Chanyeol opens the bag, takes out the CD and examines it, turning it from side to side and holding it up against the light. Minseok laughs because of how serious he is, but Chanyeol doesn't take it to heart. He's pleased to see that the CD is in its original condition.
"You took good care of it." Chanyeol slips the CD back into the bag, sips at his coffee.
"I promised," Minseok grins. "It was so refreshing to listen to the original CD instead of through my crappy earphones."
A mental image of Minseok dancing with the CD on full blast materialises in Chanyeol's head out of nowhere and he's trying not to laugh. "I can imagine," he suppresses a chuckle. "Even though I download music illegally all the time, I still make an effort to buy the albums."
"You know I really like your band's style of music, despite us being supposed rivals and all," Minseok confesses to him, voice lowered almost comically as if he's revealing a huge secret. "Indie music is refreshing. Don't tell anyone, I have a reputation to uphold."
"Rock music is pretty cool too," Chanyeol says it like he means it. "Even though I end up with migraines from all the head-banging."
Minseok snorts.
"And I just complimented you," he mock-sighs, shaking his head.
The wind chimes tinkle again and Minseok excuses himself with an apologetic smile to tend to the new customer. Chanyeol observes how Minseok genuinely smiles at the customer while taking his order, no fake smile plastered on his face, no pretences, nothing but warmness and friendliness.
Maybe that's what Chanyeol likes so much about him. He's real. And that's a rarity in the music scene that Chanyeol has dabbled in for as long as he can remember.
Minseok is away for about five minutes, during which Chanyeol busies himself with replying Baekhyun's message.
To: ByunBaek
I'm not dating anyone. Why don't you go worry your pretty little head about something else?
From: ByunBaek
You're so mean ㅠㅠ
To: ByunBaek
ㅋㅋㅋ serves you right ㅋ
The sound of footsteps alert Chanyeol of Minseok's arrival and he looks up, putting his phone away. His heart won't stop fluttering in his chest even when Minseok starts talking about his bandmates. He speaks of Yixing, who is good-natured and kind; Zitao, who builds walls around himself but is really soft and amiable once you get to know him; and of Luhan, whose smiles and laughter lights up Minseok's days.
Chanyeol thinks that perhaps it's a good thing that Minseok has a boyfriend―it'll remind him of how unattainable Minseok is and how he shouldn't be pining over him in the first place and how the mere act of seeing him is breaking all the rules. But from the way his heart is twisting itself in his chest, he thinks maybe not.
"Hey," Minseok says, gentler this time and Chanyeol pretends that this soft tone is reserved for him and him alone, "you okay?"
"Yeah," he smiles quickly, pushing out all insecurities from his mind, "whywouldn't I be?"
Minseok smiles at him and his world tilts on its axis.
They spend the rest of the afternoon talking about mundane things like how Chanyeol always loses his socks ("I swear they just disappear by themselves!") or how Minseok is a light sleeper who wakes up at the slightest noise. The warm afternoon sun draws contrasting patterns on the floor, and the occasional tinkle of wind chimes lull the two into comfortable chatter.
When he leaves with the brown paper bag tucked underneath his arm, Chanyeol has fallen a little more in love.
They become a sort-of routine after that. Chanyeol goes to the café when he's not too busy, and Minseok pops into the CD shop from time to time. In between meetups with Minseok, Chanyeol and his band practise hard for the Jisan Valley Rock Festival, and they conveniently forget about Chanyeol's "date". All they talk about when they meet is the festival.
He mentions it in passing to Minseok one day and the latter gives him a surprised "Oh?", eyebrows raised and mouth wide.
"You've heard of it too?" Chanyeol asks, pleasantly surprised.
"No, obviously I have not heard of the biggest music festival in Seoul." Minseok rolls his eyes.
Chanyeol laughs off Minseok's sarcasm. "Are you participating, then?"
"Actually, yes, we are."
"I'll confess, Baekhyun only signed us up because of the prize money," Chanyeol chuckles as he recounts how Baekhyun had burst in with a half-crazed expression on his face. Chanyeol, however, is open to attending any sort of music-related event, whether there was a prize or not. He, after all, only wants to share his love for music with everyone.
"100 million won is a lot of money, though," Minseok agrees. "Have you guys started practising for it?" Chanyeol nods. "How's it going?"
"We're playing a self-composed song, and then a cover of Nell's The Day Before," Chanyeol says, drumming his fingers on the table. "We're still trying to practise to make our stage presence better. And sometimes Baekhyundoesn't hit his high notes. So," he laughs a little nervously, "we're still working at the kinks."
Minseok smiles knowingly. He takes a large gulp of his coffee, and Chanyeol watches his Adam's apple bob up and down. "Reinvent is performing two self-composed songs. Yixing is really good at composing."
"I liked that song you performed at Domino. He's really talented," Chanyeol affirms.
"He actually composed over thirty songs for this festival. We thought they were all great, but he refused to select any of them, working on new songs until he found a few which he was satisfied with." Minseok recalls fondly the memory of his hard-working bandmate. "Sometimes I look at him and I feel horribly inadequate."
Chanyeol hastens to deny it, shaking his head so vigorously that his hair gets messed up and sticks out in all directions. Minseok chuckles at Chanyeol's antics, muttering something that sounds suspiciously like "you're so cute" before reaching out to smooth his hair back into place. Chanyeol feels like there are phantom fingers wrapping around his heart, squeezing tight and leaving him breathless.
After learning that Minseok's band is also participating in the festival, Chanyeol works doubly hard at his band practices. Not just because he wants to impress Minseok, but also because he wants to show him that he's put in a lot of effort and he really wants to win. Chanyeol's always needed to prove himself.
His bandmates notice this change, and they welcome it with open arms. Chanyeol, who wasn't the most perfectionist one of them (it used to be Baekhyun) now requests for hour-long extensions to their practice sessions when he thinks they're not good enough. And even on days when they don't have practice, Chanyeol still plays his acoustic guitar in his living room, practising his songs and irritating his neighbours, until they inevitably complain about the noise so he has no choice but to stop. Either that, or his fingers cramp up so he can't strum the strings anymore.
"Wow, Chanyeol-hyung, what made you all slave-driver these days? You used to be the most chill one out of all of us," remarks Jongin, after Chanyeol makes a few tactless remarks about their standards.
"What happened to 'music is all about enjoying yourself'?" Sehun asks, rolling his eyes. Chanyeol grits his teeth. He has no patience to deal with his bandmates' tempers now.
"We're not good enough," Chanyeol spits out, eyes blazing like fire as he wipes the beads of sweat threatening to drip into his eyes. His bangs are drenched, but he continues fingering the guitar strings mechanically.
"Chanyeol, stop, we need to take a break," Baekhyun pleads with him. "We've been practising non-stop for the past three hours and we're tired."
"Well then. If you guys are tired, you can rest. I'm not," Chanyeol replies, wiping the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve.
The rest of the members stare at each other helplessly. There's the most worry in Baekhyun's eyes, though, when he tells Chanyeol not to overwork himself and receives no reply in return.
"You're a good kid, Chanyeol," Minseok tells him with sincerity. "Good luck in the upcoming festival. Do your best. Wow the crowd." He thumps Chanyeol's back, twice, before breaking out into a smile. It's the kind that Chanyeol has grown to love, with curved eyes, lifted cheekbones, and pink gums.
"I will," Chanyeol answers simply. "You too, power vocal-hyung," he teases. Minseok huffs in mock annoyance, complaining about youngsters these days.
Inevitably, they find out, like Chanyeol always feared they would.
"What were you thinking, Chanyeol? Going out with someone from a rival band behind our backs?" Baekhyun sounds so hurt and so betrayed, that Chanyeol feels like he's been punched in the gut. Jongin immediately starts questioning him about where his loyalties lie, and Chanyeol feels guilty, to both Minseok and his bandmates.
"You lied to us, you fucking lied to us, hyung. Are we not your best friends? We trusted you," Jongin says bitterly. He mutters a how could you? under his breath, quiet but Chanyeol still hears it, loud and clear. He looks down at his shoes, not feeling quite brave enough to make eye contact with his bandmates.
"How long have you been seeing him?" Sehun asks quietly. He's the only one who hasn't lashed out at Chanyeol, but betrayal flickers in his eyes.
"I've only seen him a few times. Guys, I know you're mad at me, and I know you have all the right in the world to, but let me explain. I didn'twant to like him, it just happened―"
"Well no shit," Jongin muttered rudely under his breath.
"―and I swear we're just friends. We haven't done anything. Besides," he adds morosely, "he has a boyfriend."
Baekhyun exhales, long and resigned. He pinches the bridge of his nose and massages it, the way he does when he's trying hard to control his temper.
"Oh, so now we're supposed to pity you?" Jongin sneers. "Well this is really fucked up."
Sehun presses his lips together into a thin line. "Shut up, Jongin," he scowls, patience wearing thin.
"Look, Chanyeol," Baekhyun starts, and the tone of his voice makes Chanyeol lift his head up and actually meet his eyes, albeit fearfully. Baekhyun's a fuse and he's terrifying when he blows up. "I'm glad this hasn't progressed beyond a one-sided crush, but I don't want it to stay that way. Don't meet him anymore, okay? Keep messages and calls to a minimum. Make him think that you forgot him―in which case is what is actually gonna happen―and gradually you guys cut off contact altogether. Okay?"
When Chanyeol doesn't respond immediately, Baekhyun sighs and says in a much gentler voice. "This is what's best for us, Chanyeol-ah." Chanyeol swallows, but nods resignedly.
"Okay," he agrees.
2 missed calls and 11 new messages.
Minseok
He skims through the first few lines of the message that just recently popped up. Chanyeol sighs, deleting the notifications and turning off his phone. It's only been Day 2 of Avoid Kim Minseok but as determined as Chanyeol is to forget him, Minseok seems equally bent on doing the exact opposite. He can almost picture Minseok's worried expression, eyes wide and brows furrowed and everything just hurt. He feels like a complete asshole but it's not like he can help it.
Chanyeol wants so badly to be able to talk to Minseok like old times, when they were actually friends before Chanyeol's feelings and reality came in and ruined everything. Instead he steels himself to delete their conversation history, their call history, almost as if doing so will eventually delete Kim Minseok from his mind.
Chanyeol laughs hollowly. He knows it won't, but what harm is there to try?
Eventually the calls and messages stop. A part of Chanyeol's heart stops too.
The day of the music festival arrives sooner than Chanyeol would've liked. They arrive at a budget hotel in Yongin the day before, practising till the dead of night until they finally flop down on their beds, too exhausted to even move. For the first time in a long while, Chanyeol's exhausted but content. He just prays that everything will happen as they've practised. They fall asleep within minutes.
In the morning, Baekhyun drinks honey lemon to soothe his throat, sore from endless hours of practice. He's tempted to open his mouth and break out into song again, but a warning look from Sehun stops him from doing so.
"Hyung, you need to protect your voice," Sehun reminds him. "We need it in best condition later."
"Right," Baekhyun sheepishly rubs the back of his neck. "I promise not to sing till later."
Jongin, meanwhile, plays a slow, steady rhythm on his drum set, the occasional sound of the cymbals providing a steady beat. Sehun does simple scales on the keyboard, taking care not to overwork his fingers. They're still stiff from yesterday and the last thing he wants is for them to cramp up and miss a note. Meanwhile, Chanyeol strums a few basic chords on his guitar.
And then, Baekhyun takes one glance at the clock and says quietly, "It's time."
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