Waking Up Fine
Title: Waking Up Fine
Fandom: MBLAQ/After School
Pairing: Lee Joon/Lizzy
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2116
Summary: There's only one door that would open for her.
She was banging on the door of his small Manhattan apartment, her heart pounding fast.
After knocking twice, so hard she could hear the wood groaning, she turned to leave, muttering to herself.
She was halfway down the hall when she heard the lock turn and the door open.
He was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, squinting as he adjusted to the light. “Sooyoung? What are you doing here? It’s really late…”
“Sorry! I don’t really know what I’m doing, just wandering aimlessly, I guess, I lost my keys so I can’t go home, but I’m sorry to have bothered you, good night!” She forced herself to take deep breaths between her words, but somehow it only made them come out faster. She was shouting; there was a weight in her chest that she felt she could spit out if she spoke loud enough.
It was a mistake to come, a mistake to think that anyone would want to help her when she could offer nothing at all. She spun on her heels of her boots and started towards the elevators, gasping for air like a fish.
“Yah, Sooyoung! What are you doing? Come back here!”
Lizzy ran her hand through her hair, trying to think logically. She had no other place to go, no one to turn to in that gigantic city and its millions of people.
Changsun’s apartment was a sad contrast to what she was used to, but it was warm and the door had been opened just for her, so she was calm when she sat on his couch and accepted a cup of coffee, tired from her six mile walk and the blaring lights and loud cars that followed her around every corner. She was unsure how she had been so full of energy only minutes before.
“Six miles? Why didn’t you take a cab? You don’t even have a jacket on…”
“I left my wallet, Joon.” It had been empty, anyway.
“You left it…? Exactly where have you been, Park Sooyoung?”
“Stop calling me that, are you my mom?” But she was chuckling, nudging him with her shoulder. She took off her boots and sighed as they fell to the floor with a thump.
“I was at my boyfriend’s apartment… Well, not my boyfriend anymore, I guess…” She sipped her drink, and then wrinkled her nose. Lee Joon watched her get up and open a cabinet, knowing exactly where he kept the alcohol.
“Should you be doing that? I’m not even sure if that combination tastes good…”
Lizzy was pouring whiskey into her mug, giggling as she held the bottle high above the table and watched the long, clear stream of liquid splash into her coffee.
“I guess I’m just not wasted enough… I walked here, didn’t I?”
“… So what happened?”
He was ashamed of how excited he was by the news he had just heard. Lizzy went through a lot of boyfriends, but she was usually back on her feet a few hours afterwards without so much as a word to him. They were friends, but they never talked about their love lives; hers was too messy, and his was too… nonexistent.
But that was mostly due to the girl currently on his couch.
Lizzy shrugged. “We went to some hotel bar, I went to the bathroom, came back and he was talking to some girl with a bad dye job… It wasn’t that bad, but I got kind of annoyed, so…”
It was almost ridiculous to Changsun. If it were him, he would never look the other way if Sooyoung was in the same room. Even now, he was watching her down the rest of her coffee cocktail intently.
She got up to make another, continuing. “I left, but he followed me to the lobby… We kind of fought…”
She took a large swig from her mug, scalding her mouth, but she swallowed it, hardly feeling it burn her throat.
“You fought? What did he say? Did he hurt you?”
Lee Joon got up, clenching his fists, looking even harder than he already was at her for the tiniest scratch or bruise.
“Relax, he was kind of drunk, so I just, you know, shook him off… He grabbed my coat so I took it off and ran…” She sighed. “My keys and wallet were in the pockets. Ugh, what am I supposed to do?”
“He took your coat?” Changsun blinked and noting the reason for Lizzy’s bare shoulders.
“Yeah, but it’s fine…”
“No, it isn’t. I’ll go get it for you tomorrow.”
He put his hand on her arm, but she recoiled and scoffed. “No, Changsun! God. I don’t want you to do anything, ok?”
She looked at his shocked expression and finished her second cup. Rubbing her arms, she got up to get another one. “I mean… You don’t have to… It’s a crazy town, we both have enough to deal with, you know? I’ll call him tomorrow…”
Thinking about calling that man again set her blood on fire, but after a few seconds she felt a chill up her spine. She did not want to contact him again, but she couldn’t asking Lee Joon to do her another favor.
That’s all that she was ever doing.
Her hands were trembling as she poured the rest of the coffee into her mug. It barely filled it halfway, so she brought out the almost empty bottle again.
Changsun caught her arm. “Lizzy, stop, you’re shaking already…”
She ripped her hand away. “Don’t tell me what to do, ok?!”
Her screaming had been overlapped by the sound of the bottle crashing to the floor of Lee Joon’s kitchenette after its neck had slipped from her fingers.
“Sooyoung, what the…” Lee Joon froze as he saw Lizzy put her hands to her face, her palms over her cheeks. He could see her eyes through the spaces between her fingers. Her mouth was open and she was mouthing something, saying words he couldn’t hear.
She began to step back, but flinched when a piece of glass touched the bottom of her bare foot. He caught her by the wrists. “Hey…”
Her hands came off her face and he could see every single tear falling from her eyes. She was shaking violently now, sniffling.
Before he could think, Changsun was wiping away her tears quickly, panicked. “Lizzy! Lizzy, stop! … Sooyoung! Park Sooyoung, stop crying…”
“I’m so sorry…” She started to sob loudly, her cheeks flushed.
Her knees buckled and Lee Joon caught her before she could touch any of the glass on the floor. He fell backwards and she leaned against him as they both sat on the floor while she cried.
Lee Joon’s hands were bleeding, bits of glass stuck in them, but he could hardly feel it. He wanted to run his fingers through her hair, but his hands only hovered above her head. “Sorry? Why are you sorry? It’s ok, you can cry if you want to…”
He let out a pained noise when she pounded his chest with her fists angrily. “Dammit, Joon… I can’t… do this anymore… I’m s-so freaking tired…” She was hiccupping, almost with each breath.
“Tired of what?” He put his chin on her shoulder, holding her tight.
“I’m good-for-nothing, Joon. I’m so useless, and I just…”
She cupped her hand over her mouth, thinking about the words that had been thrown at her by the men in this city, the ones that had slapped her across the face as she walked out the door.
“Go ahead and go, then! You’ll always be some fucking pathetic nobody, anyway!”
“What are you gonna do, huh? You’re broke, just a drop-out. You’re worthless without me.”
“What, you think you’re hot shit?! You’re nothing! Just another dime a dozen bitch, you know that?”
The last one had only been hours before.
It always started out with sweet words, then the earrings and the bracelets, restaurants with crisp white tablecloths and crystal glasses. They would show her off at parties, never with a dress she had worn before.
That was what she enjoyed. But then she would realize the way they put their arm around her waist, like a collar on a dog, and she’d pull herself out.
Though not without a price.
In the end she was always just…
“Just another leech, a parasite,” she whispered, closing her eyes, though the tears squeezed through the lids.
Changsun paused, and pushed the hair out of her face so he could look into her eyes. Hand on her cheek, he said, “Lizzy… Whatever you’re thinking now… Whatever’s been happening to you, just forget it, okay?”
“You’re so beautiful, and smart, and amazing, and-”
“Just shut up, okay! You don’t know what you’re talking about!”
She was hitting him again, but each blow was weaker than the next.
But he only held her tighter, and she slipped her arms around his neck as she cried into his shoulder.
In the morning, she would remember none of this. As a rule, they never talked about what they happened while they were drunk. So he took a chance.
“I love you, you know that? I love you more than anything in the world.”
Her fists pounded on his back. “Liar, you’re lying… Stop making fun of me, let me go…”
He loosened up a bit so he could look at her. He kissed her forehead, then her eyes and cheeks. “I love you. Stop crying now…” he murmured, not caring what he was doing anymore.
Lee Joon sighed, pushing the hair from her face.
“Why did you even come here tonight, Lizzy-ah? Just to cause me trouble? Talking to me about your romance problems, I think you’re the one who’s mocking me.”
He chuckled. Lizzy looked defeated, now merely shaking her head. Her face was pale, and her eyes were bloodshot. She was still sniffling, but she wasn’t crying anymore.
“Tomorrow, what will you do? Find a new boyfriend, right? Why? You’ve already been hurt so much. Don’t you think it’s time for a change?”
He shook her lightly, and her mouth opened, as if she was going to say something.
Instead she rose to her feet quickly and threw up in the kitchen sink.
--
-Hey, where are you?
Lee Joon had woken up and walked to the fridge groggy before he realized the mess that had been left on the floor and the happenings of the previous night. He texted his friend, and was surprised when she called him back.
“Yah, Joonie!”
“What happened? How early did you leave?”
“Just a couple hours ago, actually.
“Well, as long as you’re okay…”
“Yeah, of course! I got my jacket back, too, did I tell you about what happened to it? Well, whatever. I don’t know why, but I don’t feel like crap right now, it’s funny!”
Changsun scoffed, moving around the glass on the floor with a broom, his phone between his shoulder and his cheek. “What? How is that possible? You ought to be hungover as hell right now.”
“I know, everything last night’s just a blur… Glad you let me sleep at your place, though, thanks.”
Lizzy stretched her arms in the middle of the sidewalk, waving at the bit of the gray sky that wasn’t covered by the tall buildings that poked through the clouds. “It feels like a brand new day, y’know?”
Lee Joon looked out his window. The view was terrible, and everything looked as bleak as usual, but…
“A brand new day, huh?”
“That’s right! Hey, we should do something today, Changsun.”
Remembering his words to her last night, Lee Joon bit his lip and after a while spoke into the phone again. “Sure, Lizzy. Do you want to do something tonight? I’ll buy you dinner.”
“What, you? Cheap Joon? That’s a little out of character.”
“Well, it’s good etiquette for the man to pay on the first date.” He held his breath.
Lizzy almost laughed out loud, but realized he was serious.
Changsun was nice, and they had been friends, good friends, for a long time. But he wasn’t really her type…
Don’t you think it’s time for a change?
It echoed through her head before she spoke quietly back into the phone. “Oh… Joon…”
He closed his eyes, his head lowering and his cheeks burning.
“It’s ok, you can just for-”
“Ah, if you’re paying, then I’ll go…”
He almost dropped his phone. “Oh, yeah! Yeah, ok. Great. Great, so… I’ll see you later, then. Bye.”
“Bye. Hey, Changsun-ah… And thanks. A lot.”
“Hm? Yeah, of course. I’ll see you tonight, okay?”
Lizzy smiled and hung up.
A/N: So I wrote this for a number of reasons. 1, for aupairs, hooray for the 2nd challenge! I was honestly pretty stuck on this one, and I don't think "New York" was very well incorporated into this, but ah, well... Also, I was looking at the responses, and I saw that a lot of them were het, so I was like, WHY DON'T YOU DO HET, TOO? So this was born. LASTLY, there is a serious, serious, serious, deficiency of LeeLi couple fics. As in, I haven't seen any here at LJ *sob sob* (C'mon, haven't you guys seen Pit-A-Pat Shake?) So, although I don't have huge confidence in this one, I'm glad to contribute to the number.
That's all! Thank you so much for reading this far.
Fandom: MBLAQ/After School
Pairing: Lee Joon/Lizzy
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2116
Summary: There's only one door that would open for her.
She was banging on the door of his small Manhattan apartment, her heart pounding fast.
After knocking twice, so hard she could hear the wood groaning, she turned to leave, muttering to herself.
She was halfway down the hall when she heard the lock turn and the door open.
He was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, squinting as he adjusted to the light. “Sooyoung? What are you doing here? It’s really late…”
“Sorry! I don’t really know what I’m doing, just wandering aimlessly, I guess, I lost my keys so I can’t go home, but I’m sorry to have bothered you, good night!” She forced herself to take deep breaths between her words, but somehow it only made them come out faster. She was shouting; there was a weight in her chest that she felt she could spit out if she spoke loud enough.
It was a mistake to come, a mistake to think that anyone would want to help her when she could offer nothing at all. She spun on her heels of her boots and started towards the elevators, gasping for air like a fish.
“Yah, Sooyoung! What are you doing? Come back here!”
Lizzy ran her hand through her hair, trying to think logically. She had no other place to go, no one to turn to in that gigantic city and its millions of people.
Changsun’s apartment was a sad contrast to what she was used to, but it was warm and the door had been opened just for her, so she was calm when she sat on his couch and accepted a cup of coffee, tired from her six mile walk and the blaring lights and loud cars that followed her around every corner. She was unsure how she had been so full of energy only minutes before.
“Six miles? Why didn’t you take a cab? You don’t even have a jacket on…”
“I left my wallet, Joon.” It had been empty, anyway.
“You left it…? Exactly where have you been, Park Sooyoung?”
“Stop calling me that, are you my mom?” But she was chuckling, nudging him with her shoulder. She took off her boots and sighed as they fell to the floor with a thump.
“I was at my boyfriend’s apartment… Well, not my boyfriend anymore, I guess…” She sipped her drink, and then wrinkled her nose. Lee Joon watched her get up and open a cabinet, knowing exactly where he kept the alcohol.
“Should you be doing that? I’m not even sure if that combination tastes good…”
Lizzy was pouring whiskey into her mug, giggling as she held the bottle high above the table and watched the long, clear stream of liquid splash into her coffee.
“I guess I’m just not wasted enough… I walked here, didn’t I?”
“… So what happened?”
He was ashamed of how excited he was by the news he had just heard. Lizzy went through a lot of boyfriends, but she was usually back on her feet a few hours afterwards without so much as a word to him. They were friends, but they never talked about their love lives; hers was too messy, and his was too… nonexistent.
But that was mostly due to the girl currently on his couch.
Lizzy shrugged. “We went to some hotel bar, I went to the bathroom, came back and he was talking to some girl with a bad dye job… It wasn’t that bad, but I got kind of annoyed, so…”
It was almost ridiculous to Changsun. If it were him, he would never look the other way if Sooyoung was in the same room. Even now, he was watching her down the rest of her coffee cocktail intently.
She got up to make another, continuing. “I left, but he followed me to the lobby… We kind of fought…”
She took a large swig from her mug, scalding her mouth, but she swallowed it, hardly feeling it burn her throat.
“You fought? What did he say? Did he hurt you?”
Lee Joon got up, clenching his fists, looking even harder than he already was at her for the tiniest scratch or bruise.
“Relax, he was kind of drunk, so I just, you know, shook him off… He grabbed my coat so I took it off and ran…” She sighed. “My keys and wallet were in the pockets. Ugh, what am I supposed to do?”
“He took your coat?” Changsun blinked and noting the reason for Lizzy’s bare shoulders.
“Yeah, but it’s fine…”
“No, it isn’t. I’ll go get it for you tomorrow.”
He put his hand on her arm, but she recoiled and scoffed. “No, Changsun! God. I don’t want you to do anything, ok?”
She looked at his shocked expression and finished her second cup. Rubbing her arms, she got up to get another one. “I mean… You don’t have to… It’s a crazy town, we both have enough to deal with, you know? I’ll call him tomorrow…”
Thinking about calling that man again set her blood on fire, but after a few seconds she felt a chill up her spine. She did not want to contact him again, but she couldn’t asking Lee Joon to do her another favor.
That’s all that she was ever doing.
Her hands were trembling as she poured the rest of the coffee into her mug. It barely filled it halfway, so she brought out the almost empty bottle again.
Changsun caught her arm. “Lizzy, stop, you’re shaking already…”
She ripped her hand away. “Don’t tell me what to do, ok?!”
Her screaming had been overlapped by the sound of the bottle crashing to the floor of Lee Joon’s kitchenette after its neck had slipped from her fingers.
“Sooyoung, what the…” Lee Joon froze as he saw Lizzy put her hands to her face, her palms over her cheeks. He could see her eyes through the spaces between her fingers. Her mouth was open and she was mouthing something, saying words he couldn’t hear.
She began to step back, but flinched when a piece of glass touched the bottom of her bare foot. He caught her by the wrists. “Hey…”
Her hands came off her face and he could see every single tear falling from her eyes. She was shaking violently now, sniffling.
Before he could think, Changsun was wiping away her tears quickly, panicked. “Lizzy! Lizzy, stop! … Sooyoung! Park Sooyoung, stop crying…”
“I’m so sorry…” She started to sob loudly, her cheeks flushed.
Her knees buckled and Lee Joon caught her before she could touch any of the glass on the floor. He fell backwards and she leaned against him as they both sat on the floor while she cried.
Lee Joon’s hands were bleeding, bits of glass stuck in them, but he could hardly feel it. He wanted to run his fingers through her hair, but his hands only hovered above her head. “Sorry? Why are you sorry? It’s ok, you can cry if you want to…”
He let out a pained noise when she pounded his chest with her fists angrily. “Dammit, Joon… I can’t… do this anymore… I’m s-so freaking tired…” She was hiccupping, almost with each breath.
“Tired of what?” He put his chin on her shoulder, holding her tight.
“I’m good-for-nothing, Joon. I’m so useless, and I just…”
She cupped her hand over her mouth, thinking about the words that had been thrown at her by the men in this city, the ones that had slapped her across the face as she walked out the door.
“Go ahead and go, then! You’ll always be some fucking pathetic nobody, anyway!”
“What are you gonna do, huh? You’re broke, just a drop-out. You’re worthless without me.”
“What, you think you’re hot shit?! You’re nothing! Just another dime a dozen bitch, you know that?”
The last one had only been hours before.
It always started out with sweet words, then the earrings and the bracelets, restaurants with crisp white tablecloths and crystal glasses. They would show her off at parties, never with a dress she had worn before.
That was what she enjoyed. But then she would realize the way they put their arm around her waist, like a collar on a dog, and she’d pull herself out.
Though not without a price.
In the end she was always just…
“Just another leech, a parasite,” she whispered, closing her eyes, though the tears squeezed through the lids.
Changsun paused, and pushed the hair out of her face so he could look into her eyes. Hand on her cheek, he said, “Lizzy… Whatever you’re thinking now… Whatever’s been happening to you, just forget it, okay?”
“You’re so beautiful, and smart, and amazing, and-”
“Just shut up, okay! You don’t know what you’re talking about!”
She was hitting him again, but each blow was weaker than the next.
But he only held her tighter, and she slipped her arms around his neck as she cried into his shoulder.
In the morning, she would remember none of this. As a rule, they never talked about what they happened while they were drunk. So he took a chance.
“I love you, you know that? I love you more than anything in the world.”
Her fists pounded on his back. “Liar, you’re lying… Stop making fun of me, let me go…”
He loosened up a bit so he could look at her. He kissed her forehead, then her eyes and cheeks. “I love you. Stop crying now…” he murmured, not caring what he was doing anymore.
Lee Joon sighed, pushing the hair from her face.
“Why did you even come here tonight, Lizzy-ah? Just to cause me trouble? Talking to me about your romance problems, I think you’re the one who’s mocking me.”
He chuckled. Lizzy looked defeated, now merely shaking her head. Her face was pale, and her eyes were bloodshot. She was still sniffling, but she wasn’t crying anymore.
“Tomorrow, what will you do? Find a new boyfriend, right? Why? You’ve already been hurt so much. Don’t you think it’s time for a change?”
He shook her lightly, and her mouth opened, as if she was going to say something.
Instead she rose to her feet quickly and threw up in the kitchen sink.
--
-Hey, where are you?
Lee Joon had woken up and walked to the fridge groggy before he realized the mess that had been left on the floor and the happenings of the previous night. He texted his friend, and was surprised when she called him back.
“Yah, Joonie!”
“What happened? How early did you leave?”
“Just a couple hours ago, actually.
“Well, as long as you’re okay…”
“Yeah, of course! I got my jacket back, too, did I tell you about what happened to it? Well, whatever. I don’t know why, but I don’t feel like crap right now, it’s funny!”
Changsun scoffed, moving around the glass on the floor with a broom, his phone between his shoulder and his cheek. “What? How is that possible? You ought to be hungover as hell right now.”
“I know, everything last night’s just a blur… Glad you let me sleep at your place, though, thanks.”
Lizzy stretched her arms in the middle of the sidewalk, waving at the bit of the gray sky that wasn’t covered by the tall buildings that poked through the clouds. “It feels like a brand new day, y’know?”
Lee Joon looked out his window. The view was terrible, and everything looked as bleak as usual, but…
“A brand new day, huh?”
“That’s right! Hey, we should do something today, Changsun.”
Remembering his words to her last night, Lee Joon bit his lip and after a while spoke into the phone again. “Sure, Lizzy. Do you want to do something tonight? I’ll buy you dinner.”
“What, you? Cheap Joon? That’s a little out of character.”
“Well, it’s good etiquette for the man to pay on the first date.” He held his breath.
Lizzy almost laughed out loud, but realized he was serious.
Changsun was nice, and they had been friends, good friends, for a long time. But he wasn’t really her type…
Don’t you think it’s time for a change?
It echoed through her head before she spoke quietly back into the phone. “Oh… Joon…”
He closed his eyes, his head lowering and his cheeks burning.
“It’s ok, you can just for-”
“Ah, if you’re paying, then I’ll go…”
He almost dropped his phone. “Oh, yeah! Yeah, ok. Great. Great, so… I’ll see you later, then. Bye.”
“Bye. Hey, Changsun-ah… And thanks. A lot.”
“Hm? Yeah, of course. I’ll see you tonight, okay?”
Lizzy smiled and hung up.
A/N: So I wrote this for a number of reasons. 1, for aupairs, hooray for the 2nd challenge! I was honestly pretty stuck on this one, and I don't think "New York" was very well incorporated into this, but ah, well... Also, I was looking at the responses, and I saw that a lot of them were het, so I was like, WHY DON'T YOU DO HET, TOO? So this was born. LASTLY, there is a serious, serious, serious, deficiency of LeeLi couple fics. As in, I haven't seen any here at LJ *sob sob* (C'mon, haven't you guys seen Pit-A-Pat Shake?) So, although I don't have huge confidence in this one, I'm glad to contribute to the number.
That's all! Thank you so much for reading this far.