"i said maybe you're gonna be the one saves me"
just when i was thinking that no one cared about me.....kyle and i had a really good conversation.
corruptwufei: r u there?
ToolGirlie02: yes
ToolGirlie02: sadly
corruptwufei: i too fell like my existence is only sustained by my health
ToolGirlie02: yes.
corruptwufei: simply
corruptwufei: i feel like im dead
ToolGirlie02: life is really shitty right now
ToolGirlie02: im sad
ToolGirlie02: and upset
ToolGirlie02: and crying
ToolGirlie02: and fucking just CRUSHED
corruptwufei: can i ask why and how?
ToolGirlie02: man...its such a long story
ToolGirlie02: different things
corruptwufei: is it on your journal?
ToolGirlie02: some of it
ToolGirlie02: it wouldnt hurt to read it
corruptwufei: ok
corruptwufei: andrea,......
corruptwufei: i love you
corruptwufei: im serious
corruptwufei: i really love you with the deepest part of care in my heart
corruptwufei: not like in a girlfriend way
corruptwufei: in a friend way
corruptwufei: your like this big loving sister
ToolGirlie02: :-)
corruptwufei: who knows all this shit and gives me advice caus youve been where i am
corruptwufei: with all the making out removed....i loved being around you
corruptwufei: your one of the few people who trully make me happy
ToolGirlie02: well thank you
corruptwufei: you are indeed welcome
ToolGirlie02: i appreciate that
corruptwufei: i appreciate YOU
ToolGirlie02: you didnt like making out with me?!?!?
ToolGirlie02: ;-)
corruptwufei: no i liked it
corruptwufei: just you were so much more than that
ToolGirlie02: you rock my socks kyle...you're so cool
ToolGirlie02: im glad i had a positive impact on you
corruptwufei: thanx but i say it because it came from my heart
corruptwufei: because you need that
ToolGirlie02: :-)...im touched
corruptwufei: because you deserve that
ToolGirlie02: aww.
corruptwufei: andrea im glad you were there that august night
corruptwufei: because i was alone
corruptwufei: alone and blind
ToolGirlie02: wow..i'm glad i was there too. i was also alone
ToolGirlie02: and i learned a lot from you
corruptwufei: but you opened my eyes beyond this middle class white suburban life
ToolGirlie02: i had no idea that i had such an effect on you
corruptwufei: you were not only someone special you were a mentor and a post i could lean on
corruptwufei: andrea
corruptwufei: this is bringing freaking tears to my fuckin eyes
corruptwufei: god damnit
corruptwufei: dont ever EVER kill yourself
corruptwufei: ever
corruptwufei: i love you way too much to ever lose you
ToolGirlie02: oh wow..i would NEVER do something like that
corruptwufei: ok
corruptwufei: just checkin
ToolGirlie02: i mean, no matter how bad things get i'll always turn to my personal motto
corruptwufei: which is...
ToolGirlie02: everything always works out in the end...EVERYTHING. no matter how shitty it is while you're stuck in the middle of it all.
ToolGirlie02: i know i've said that to you a few times
corruptwufei: i feel weird saying this but,... your pain has opened that last door in my heart i was reserving because i hated everything and hated life, but now its finally looking ok again
corruptwufei: like it was when i was small
corruptwufei: like i still have the future i want
corruptwufei: like these tears are the last restraints i'm shedding to finally enjoy life
corruptwufei: andrea, i really really do love you and dont regret anything i ever did with you or did because of you
ToolGirlie02: i understand that, i really do.
ToolGirlie02: i love you too kyle. and likewise on the no regrets
corruptwufei: you bring joy to my heart, once again
corruptwufei: damnit!
ToolGirlie02: what?
corruptwufei: fuckin lucky this shit isnt on the phone im all choked up
ToolGirlie02: hehe..me too....me too
ToolGirlie02: thank you kyle..
ToolGirlie02: you really pulled me out of my hole today
corruptwufei: i feel good about pulling you out of your hole
corruptwufei: i like to help out the ones i love
ToolGirlie02: :-)
wow, he really made me feel good about myself.
and today is another completely different day....with new experiences and new opportunities. and in just a few short overnight hours your whole perspective on things can change. i'm glad. but i really still feel like i made a fool out of myself last night. oh well.
"roll these misty windows down to catch my breath again and then go and go and go just drive me home then back again. here I lay just like always. don't let me go. take me to the edge."
-deftones featuring maynard james keenan
corruptwufei: r u there?
ToolGirlie02: yes
ToolGirlie02: sadly
corruptwufei: i too fell like my existence is only sustained by my health
ToolGirlie02: yes.
corruptwufei: simply
corruptwufei: i feel like im dead
ToolGirlie02: life is really shitty right now
ToolGirlie02: im sad
ToolGirlie02: and upset
ToolGirlie02: and crying
ToolGirlie02: and fucking just CRUSHED
corruptwufei: can i ask why and how?
ToolGirlie02: man...its such a long story
ToolGirlie02: different things
corruptwufei: is it on your journal?
ToolGirlie02: some of it
ToolGirlie02: it wouldnt hurt to read it
corruptwufei: ok
corruptwufei: andrea,......
corruptwufei: i love you
corruptwufei: im serious
corruptwufei: i really love you with the deepest part of care in my heart
corruptwufei: not like in a girlfriend way
corruptwufei: in a friend way
corruptwufei: your like this big loving sister
ToolGirlie02: :-)
corruptwufei: who knows all this shit and gives me advice caus youve been where i am
corruptwufei: with all the making out removed....i loved being around you
corruptwufei: your one of the few people who trully make me happy
ToolGirlie02: well thank you
corruptwufei: you are indeed welcome
ToolGirlie02: i appreciate that
corruptwufei: i appreciate YOU
ToolGirlie02: you didnt like making out with me?!?!?
ToolGirlie02: ;-)
corruptwufei: no i liked it
corruptwufei: just you were so much more than that
ToolGirlie02: you rock my socks kyle...you're so cool
ToolGirlie02: im glad i had a positive impact on you
corruptwufei: thanx but i say it because it came from my heart
corruptwufei: because you need that
ToolGirlie02: :-)...im touched
corruptwufei: because you deserve that
ToolGirlie02: aww.
corruptwufei: andrea im glad you were there that august night
corruptwufei: because i was alone
corruptwufei: alone and blind
ToolGirlie02: wow..i'm glad i was there too. i was also alone
ToolGirlie02: and i learned a lot from you
corruptwufei: but you opened my eyes beyond this middle class white suburban life
ToolGirlie02: i had no idea that i had such an effect on you
corruptwufei: you were not only someone special you were a mentor and a post i could lean on
corruptwufei: andrea
corruptwufei: this is bringing freaking tears to my fuckin eyes
corruptwufei: god damnit
corruptwufei: dont ever EVER kill yourself
corruptwufei: ever
corruptwufei: i love you way too much to ever lose you
ToolGirlie02: oh wow..i would NEVER do something like that
corruptwufei: ok
corruptwufei: just checkin
ToolGirlie02: i mean, no matter how bad things get i'll always turn to my personal motto
corruptwufei: which is...
ToolGirlie02: everything always works out in the end...EVERYTHING. no matter how shitty it is while you're stuck in the middle of it all.
ToolGirlie02: i know i've said that to you a few times
corruptwufei: i feel weird saying this but,... your pain has opened that last door in my heart i was reserving because i hated everything and hated life, but now its finally looking ok again
corruptwufei: like it was when i was small
corruptwufei: like i still have the future i want
corruptwufei: like these tears are the last restraints i'm shedding to finally enjoy life
corruptwufei: andrea, i really really do love you and dont regret anything i ever did with you or did because of you
ToolGirlie02: i understand that, i really do.
ToolGirlie02: i love you too kyle. and likewise on the no regrets
corruptwufei: you bring joy to my heart, once again
corruptwufei: damnit!
ToolGirlie02: what?
corruptwufei: fuckin lucky this shit isnt on the phone im all choked up
ToolGirlie02: hehe..me too....me too
ToolGirlie02: thank you kyle..
ToolGirlie02: you really pulled me out of my hole today
corruptwufei: i feel good about pulling you out of your hole
corruptwufei: i like to help out the ones i love
ToolGirlie02: :-)
wow, he really made me feel good about myself.
and today is another completely different day....with new experiences and new opportunities. and in just a few short overnight hours your whole perspective on things can change. i'm glad. but i really still feel like i made a fool out of myself last night. oh well.
"roll these misty windows down to catch my breath again and then go and go and go just drive me home then back again. here I lay just like always. don't let me go. take me to the edge."
-deftones featuring maynard james keenan