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Mar 08, 2008 23:17

i've been feeling super alone lately. trying to shake the feeling, but it doesn't seem to be going away. me = emo. boooo. i really don't like it ( Read more... )

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Comments 19

schoolboyxcrush March 9 2008, 08:43:06 UTC
I've been feeling the same way lately. Maybe we should grab a tea together. You haven't met my kitten-monkey yet!

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misguidedsadist March 9 2008, 19:47:20 UTC
That would be great :)

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livelovewrite March 10 2008, 03:11:41 UTC
If I didn't live in, you know, another country, I would totally hang out with you.

I think transitioning can be isolating sometimes.

Even so, I can tell you that going through this process is rewarding in its own weird ways. Lots of people have mood issues and do just fine on T. In fact, T has a mild anti-depressant effect. I've also noticed I have less anxiety on T.

For what it's worth.

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misguidedsadist March 10 2008, 03:21:46 UTC
Well if you ever feel the need to visit Vancouver, I'll show you around :)

Thanks for the tips as well. I just really don't think I can handle looking so female for another so many months, you know? Its not like I want things to happen overnight, but going on the gel is giving me more anxiety. Ultimately, I think my endo will do whatever makes me happy and healthy. I'm pretty sure he knows my psychologist. And i'm going to be totally upfront about it with him as well. I have a friend that has seen him, and said he's a great doctor.

And I understand her concerns as well, but it would be a different story if I was bipolar, and didn't take my meds, or something of the sort.

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livelovewrite March 10 2008, 04:21:29 UTC
I will totally call you if I come to Vancouver. I visited once, years ago, and really liked it. It was a gorgeous place.

I was on the gel, and then the cream, for about six months, and I can tell you there are changes, but they are slow. I finally felt like I was doing it kind of "half-assed" and went full-throttle, with the shots.

I have seasonal affective disorder which is similar to bipolar in that I have periods of depression and periods of hypomania. So I was concerned about mood issues, as well. But honestly, I've felt more stable on the shots (have now had two) then I did on the gel and the cream. Most guys I know report that more frequent shots (e.g., every week, or every 10 days) keeps some of the moodiness under control.

Exciting that you're going on T -- hope you blog about it some. There are a couple of guys on my friends list who started around the same time I did, and they don't update much, but when they do, I'm always really interested in what changes they've experienced.

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misguidedsadist March 10 2008, 08:27:30 UTC
I think the slow changes would irritate me more than anything. I'm totally out, including my family, so there is no reason for me to worry about that. Ooo aside from work. I just started a new job, and will have to tell them.

Yeah, that's what i was thinking as well. Weekly shots as opposed to bi monthly. And its great to hear you feel more stable. I have SAD on top of being bipolar.

I will definitely blog about it. Actually, I've started up a blog on youtube to document it. http://www.youtube.com/RayElianLee is the address.

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heroinchains March 10 2008, 06:02:33 UTC
I've also been feeling the same way lately. Dinner or tea sometime this week if you've got some time?

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misguidedsadist March 10 2008, 08:23:48 UTC
It's really comforting to know I'm not alone in feeling alone :)

What's your schedule like? Thursday is the only day I have plans. And I'm off at four everyday.

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heroinchains March 10 2008, 21:13:01 UTC
I've got this evening free, and tomorrow between 4:30 and 7:30. If you're interested at 7:30 there's a few folks getting together at my house to watch crappy tv (the L word).

And then there's Friday. You're going to the Queeruption film screening, yes? I really want to show up, but am also leaving the city the next day, so depends on how much packing I've gotten done.

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misguidedsadist March 11 2008, 02:20:32 UTC
Sorry i didn't reply until now, was suuuper busy. anyways, tomorrow sounds rad actually, i've kept up watching the L word even tho it infuriates me. i'll text you 2morrow, and maybe would could hang out around 6 or something.

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cinderellasdead March 11 2008, 02:44:01 UTC
i've so been there! it will get better with time.

you know if you ever need anything, youc an always call or text me. i'm always up til like... 5am (2am there) and am more than willing to wake up to talk :)

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misguidedsadist March 11 2008, 04:43:26 UTC
Thanks Max :) I actually bought a calling card a bit ago, so I might take you up on that fairly soon. Any day better than others?

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cinderellasdead March 13 2008, 20:19:21 UTC
you get a 24 hour access pass. seing as we're married now :p

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_st_kimmy_ March 11 2008, 04:26:45 UTC
Hey. I posted on vancouver looking for people with body mods. If you're still interested, hit me up at lil_ms_kim@hotmail.com.

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