my life has been thus far uneventful (since the last entry). last weekend however was alright, ross, ryan, sara and i took mushrooms. dickie was there and was sober, but i swear he was crazier than any of us on shrooms ( Read more... )

morphine, xanax, wine, sleep.

i just found out that mary hansen, keyboard player of stereolab died on tues. in a car accident, she's like my hero :(

i have a boyfriend, and we don't connect AT ALL! why do we stay together? out of convenience? out of boredom? thats bullshit! i have never had a problem being alone before, why start now, i have many plans laid out for myself, none of which include him...i just don't know how to tell him i'm over it. we had some great times together, but i'm done ( Read more... )

i had a dream about dave last night....

jesus, i miss him.

i should've expected this....
heroin always finds its way back to me,
this time it came in the form of a boy
i truly adore, and now i can't stop crying.

ross is the best! just the thought of the boy puts the biggest smile on my face, being at his house and hanging out w/ his friends makes me feel right at home. his friends treat me as if i am the coolest girl they've ever encountered, i love it ( Read more... )

a brief summary of events this weekend ( Read more... )

so the halloween party i have been planning w/ ross and ryan should turn out to be a blast this weekend! however i'm dissappointed w/ my costume :( it's not what i wanted to be, but i wasn't creative enough to make the costume i wanted. i wanted to be lydia from THE CARTOON version of beetleguise, ya know w/ the little red spiderweb cape, sounds ( Read more... )

why is it that i feel guilty when i'm totally happy, like i don't deserve to be completely satisfied, i always either feel guilty, or insecure, like it's not gonna last. right now i feel guilty, what's wrong with me?