The opinions of others - mindfulness day 3

[miss_soap]

So when I was growing up, my mum (who suffers with anxiety disorder and self-image/confidence issues) spent a whole lot of time worrying about how she looked, what other people thought etc. So naturally this was behaviour I learned. Paranoia about being laughed at, gossipped about, sneered at. Unsure whether this is consequence or cause, but

Comments

[kotenok]

What does it matter if they don't like me

Indeed. This is one of the reasons I've deactivated my FB account now as it was making that attitude a lot harder and harder to keep.

[hsb]

Life got a lot easier the day I first managed to remember that the opinion of those you either will never see again or don't like in the first place rarely matters (workplaces aside).

I am not great about maintaining this view, but it made parenting exponentially easier. Actually, doing something quite visible, in that people have Opinions about what you are doing and really will come up and tell you them, pretty much enforces the Fuck 'Em attitude.

I think it is probably easier that I'm not on FB, though. And that LJ can be filtered, so that if I want to flap about a personal dilemma, it can just go to people I trust. It's unfortunate that LJ is so quiet that you often get insufficient feedback unless you put it more publicly, on a comm, but apart from that aspect I still prefer LJ to other networks.

H

[glamgothruthy]

i won't lie, some days i still worry about not being size 10, - maybe i could be if i really tried, on bad days i wonder how my life would be different if ' i was thinner/fitter/etc. But most of the time now i just get on with being me, though it ain't perfect - its not half bad. Got alot of friends and alot of of good times to say it must be ok. Happiest does depend to me still that i am liked, but i am what i am, confidence lies within and i still just get on with it.