Day 2 is....Your First Love
Hahahahahaha!!!!
Ugh. My first love has so far been my only love and I greatly look forward to getting someone new into the "Love" category.
C was an asshat. He was sweet and family-oriented and fawned over me juuuuust enough. Well, until he totally quit me cold turkey. Rude. I was pretty devastated and put on a great face as a highly functional depressed college kid. It helped that I wasn't living at home and could wallow in my misery without my mother knowing. Ok, so she knew, but she didn't KNOW. Like I said, I was high functioning and a good liar.
But he totes swept me off my feet. The first time he kissed me, my legs went to jelly and I couldn't breathe. Total Disney-lovers moment! He was attentive and interested in me. He got my nerdy side and sort of understood my academic side, though school was not his thing. He was close with his family so he respected my committments to mine. I got very close with his. He didn't really get my community involvement side nor my religious side and sort-of openly mocked me. I mentioned discrete sarcasm in my last post? Yeah. Sometimes when I thought he was indulging me, I realize now he was just teasing me. Not cool! He was successful and shared my need to go and see and do. We were always out on the town or in bed. Trust- both were really nice! We talked futures and marriages and plans. His extended family was great and considered me a part of everything.
And when he broke my heart, I was sure he would come back around. His family- parents, grandma, siblings- all called me up, apologized, and insisted he would too. But then my pragmatic, protected piece of myself prompted me to say it out loud right away: if we never got back together, he would marry the next girl he dated. I said it out loud the night he broke up with me, and I'll be damned if he wasn't engaged within the next year.
When the veil was lifted from my eyes, I saw all the things that were wrong with our relationship and I am so fine with the fact that we are not together. Though the brownchickenbrowncow was really good. I'm also a little bitter that he's so happy in his life because naturally, I wanted to be the first to be blissfully happy with someone else. Ah well. Can't win them all.
I went back to College Town a few weeks ago, where he lives. I was totally certain, of all the people in that town, after 2.5 years, we would never possibly run into one another. We were leaving the patio after drinks when all of a sudden I was rushed from the side and picked-up in a HUGE hug. I couldn't see the person, and my girlfriends all had blank looks on their faces. When I was put down and turned to see who it was, I felt like I'd been struck by lightning. But I am pretty damn proud of myself for being so charming and pleasant. And I was SO HAPPY I looked really hawt that day! Even his brother who was with him and whom I still consider a friend, mentioned that I looked great. ;)
Again, proud of how I handled the situation. Kinda suprised that he didn't totally ignore me. And a little bit appalled that he had the audacity to hug me and act like we're friends still. We haven't spoken since the summer after the breakup when he tried to booty call me at the lake and I told him that wasn't going to happen. He asked why and before I could respond he asked if I had met someone, called me a bitch, and hung up on me. Drama queen much??? So yeah, that, followed by a big hug 2 years and one marriage later. Dude has issues.
Ah first love. Ain't it grand???
Ugh. My first love has so far been my only love and I greatly look forward to getting someone new into the "Love" category.
C was an asshat. He was sweet and family-oriented and fawned over me juuuuust enough. Well, until he totally quit me cold turkey. Rude. I was pretty devastated and put on a great face as a highly functional depressed college kid. It helped that I wasn't living at home and could wallow in my misery without my mother knowing. Ok, so she knew, but she didn't KNOW. Like I said, I was high functioning and a good liar.
But he totes swept me off my feet. The first time he kissed me, my legs went to jelly and I couldn't breathe. Total Disney-lovers moment! He was attentive and interested in me. He got my nerdy side and sort of understood my academic side, though school was not his thing. He was close with his family so he respected my committments to mine. I got very close with his. He didn't really get my community involvement side nor my religious side and sort-of openly mocked me. I mentioned discrete sarcasm in my last post? Yeah. Sometimes when I thought he was indulging me, I realize now he was just teasing me. Not cool! He was successful and shared my need to go and see and do. We were always out on the town or in bed. Trust- both were really nice! We talked futures and marriages and plans. His extended family was great and considered me a part of everything.
And when he broke my heart, I was sure he would come back around. His family- parents, grandma, siblings- all called me up, apologized, and insisted he would too. But then my pragmatic, protected piece of myself prompted me to say it out loud right away: if we never got back together, he would marry the next girl he dated. I said it out loud the night he broke up with me, and I'll be damned if he wasn't engaged within the next year.
When the veil was lifted from my eyes, I saw all the things that were wrong with our relationship and I am so fine with the fact that we are not together. Though the brownchickenbrowncow was really good. I'm also a little bitter that he's so happy in his life because naturally, I wanted to be the first to be blissfully happy with someone else. Ah well. Can't win them all.
I went back to College Town a few weeks ago, where he lives. I was totally certain, of all the people in that town, after 2.5 years, we would never possibly run into one another. We were leaving the patio after drinks when all of a sudden I was rushed from the side and picked-up in a HUGE hug. I couldn't see the person, and my girlfriends all had blank looks on their faces. When I was put down and turned to see who it was, I felt like I'd been struck by lightning. But I am pretty damn proud of myself for being so charming and pleasant. And I was SO HAPPY I looked really hawt that day! Even his brother who was with him and whom I still consider a friend, mentioned that I looked great. ;)
Again, proud of how I handled the situation. Kinda suprised that he didn't totally ignore me. And a little bit appalled that he had the audacity to hug me and act like we're friends still. We haven't spoken since the summer after the breakup when he tried to booty call me at the lake and I told him that wasn't going to happen. He asked why and before I could respond he asked if I had met someone, called me a bitch, and hung up on me. Drama queen much??? So yeah, that, followed by a big hug 2 years and one marriage later. Dude has issues.
Ah first love. Ain't it grand???