it costs more to divorce than to marry...

[missfrost]

Are you happy? Think about it. What if someone asked you that question right now and you absolutely had to answer. I watched a documentary on the very subject about 25 years ago and the main conclusion was that we put off being happy for no reason - 'I'll be happy when I earn X amount/have a lovely partner/lose this much weight...' and the

Comments

[tiny_tear]

Always look on the bright side of life
;-)

[lady_mitzi]

Haha! My husband is a bit of a Monica and I find myself being the precise opposite because I CANNOT BEAR the misery and bitterness. Sometimes I'm grateful for that, sometimes I wish he'd just SHUT UP.

[charleston]

I am happy pretty much most of the time. I think I was depressed for so long that every day that I'm not depressed I am totally happy and feel that I have everything I need. When the black fit falls again I'm the most miserably emo monster in the world, though. Swings, roundabouts, whore's drawers.

[puzzled_anwen]

I am a grumpy bastard at heart, but have had quite a few people express surprise when I mention I have depression, so I don't quite know how I come across. If I'm exhausted and in a lot of pain, though, I can't do the 'fine thanks!' thing, and ended up having to ask people at work to just not ask how I was because they wouldn't like the answer (I don't mean I said 'don't ask...' in response to the question, I actually just said look, I can't do this just out of politeness, sorry).

I've been pretty happy this year so far, though, although it's kind of weird because my brain is still acting like a depressed brain (trouble making plans, decisions etc) but I'm kind of, you know, not feeling miserable. Weird.

[nou]

I'm also familiar with the depressed-but-not-miserable feeling. I find it hard to explain to people who haven't experienced it.

Re the "how are you" question - YES. Intellectually, I understand that it's often just a longer way of saying "hello", but for some reason it feels wrong to treat it that way and just give the socially acceptable answer of "fine, and you?"

[ursarctous]

i think finding middle ground is important. monica does sound awful, and cheeriness is almost always a good thing, but sometimes it's okay to feel down, and when you do, it can be incredibly hurtful if everyone around you is acting like it's not important and telling you to look on the bright side. i do admire people who have sunny, positive attitudes, but full time they exhaust me just as much as the ones who are always negative.

[kiss_me_quick]

This.

[puzzled_anwen]

Concur.

[burnyourbones]

FULLY agree.