then pick up the phone and tell me. i talked about you coming all week. i waited around for you all day. and all i get is a text telling me youre not coming.
you say you miss me, miss having friends, and then you turn around and ditch me. i don't get it. you can't treat your friends like that and then expect them to still be there for you.
when you are ready to make me as important as i make you, then maybe you'll be lucky enough to have me there.
-not that it is any of my buisnesssswhitneeloveJuly 5 2006, 23:21:29 UTC
EXACTLY ive been telling YOU AMANDA this for months. YOU WANT FRIENDS you have to be friends to US!
If your going to do something fucking do it. and if your going to bail fucking call. FRIENDS DONT TEXT WHEN THEY ARE TRULEY SORRY. Its just fucked up.
Seriously. everything you tell us contradicts everything you do. actions speak louder than words honey You miss us? You miss having friends? DONT FUCKING BAIL ON US!
& PLEASE please please call us tonight. Me and allie will be together when i get off @ eight. YOU WANT TO TALK? YOU WANT FRIENDS?
make an effort because soon were going to be sick of trying. one day we are not going to keep being there for someone who cant be there for us.
Re: -not that it is any of my buisnessss__piratexamandaJuly 5 2006, 23:57:20 UTC
I can't call you tonight, because anytime I hangout with you guys it feels like I'm just an outsider invading on your fun time.
Allie I'm sorry I didn't call you, I was upset and couldn't even talk to anyone. My mom fucking tears me a new one, and I thought I could just text you without having to call you crying and worrying you. Sorry.
I'm a disapointment to everyone. my mom, you guys, everyone.
Re: -not that it is any of my buisnesssswhitneeloveJuly 6 2006, 00:07:22 UTC
YOU ARE NOT A FUCKING DISAPOINTMENT OR A PIECE OF SHIT!
STOP BEING SO FUCKING NEGATIVE AMAANDA.
if you werent so negative & youd get out and have fun with us. you would feel so much better!
STOP PUTTING OFF THE "POOR ME" PITTY CASE BULLSHIT.
we are trying to fucking help you BUT IF YOU DONT WANT IT FINE AMANDA. you can fucking be like this.
last week we had fun. we had an incredible night! you were positive as fuck & taking control of your life. you were doing amazing. you were happy! everything was going great.
stop letting people tear you apart! stop tearing yourself apart! your an incredible person. and an amazing friend.
you just need to get out of this hole! your not happy....
but if im wrong & you are happy than fine. tell me your happy & ill leave you alone.
Re: -not that it is any of my buisnessss__piratexamandaJuly 6 2006, 00:12:17 UTC
we all know I'm not happy. and no matter how hard I try, I can't be.
I can't stop feeling the way I feel no matter how much I try and change it, it doesn't stop. I can pretend, and I can put on a good show... but I always feel like shit.
I'm sorry I bring you all down.
I want to be happy, and I want to hangout with you guys. I don't know how it will work.
It probably won't ever happen. ...because I like being pathetic and sad.
I wish you guys would have invited me to come last saturday, or any day for that matter. I usually just sit at home on my days off... but thats ok. I know I'm a debbie downer.
we are not mad at you. we dont want you sitting home alone all the time. we dont want you fighting with dane all of the time. we just dont want you unhappy.
we want you to come. allie has to be home early too anyway.
its completley up to you though. we just love you.
ive been trying to help you for months now. you know that.
but if you dont want the help. your welcome to say so hun.
good thing. dont ever expect perfection. my best days are when i expect nothing. because then any little thing that happens turns into the best and biggest thing ever and completly makes my day!
perfection only exists because you say it does. &happiness is only what you make it. it's only the worst day of your life if you say it is. and it's only the best day of your life because you let it be.
please come amanda. i'll see you at eight.
ps: i just realized that don't believe in strangers anymore. thanks for cutting off my arms whitnee.
Comments 14
I didn't think that day would be as shitty as it was.
My mom was being mean to me, and it started raining when I was at lunch, the power went out, so I said "fuck it"
and went home, watched the nightmare before christmas with carlee, and went to bed.
I didn't see any fireworks.
Reply
i talked about you coming all week.
i waited around for you all day.
and all i get is a text telling me youre not coming.
you say you miss me, miss having friends,
and then you turn around and ditch me.
i don't get it.
you can't treat your friends like that
and then expect them to still be there for you.
when you are ready to make me as important as i make you,
then maybe you'll be lucky enough to have me there.
but i'm not making promises.
not this time.
Reply
YOU WANT FRIENDS you have to be friends to US!
If your going to do something fucking do it.
and if your going to bail fucking call.
FRIENDS DONT TEXT WHEN THEY ARE TRULEY SORRY.
Its just fucked up.
Seriously. everything you tell us contradicts everything you do.
actions speak louder than words honey
You miss us? You miss having friends?
DONT FUCKING BAIL ON US!
& PLEASE please please call us tonight.
Me and allie will be together when i get off @ eight.
YOU WANT TO TALK?
YOU WANT FRIENDS?
make an effort because soon were going to be sick of trying.
one day we are not going to keep being there for someone
who cant be there for us.
STOP GETTING OUR HOPES UP AND SHOOTING US DOWN.
Reply
Allie I'm sorry I didn't call you, I was upset and couldn't even talk to anyone.
My mom fucking tears me a new one, and I thought I could just text you without having to call you crying and worrying you.
Sorry.
I'm a disapointment to everyone.
my mom, you guys, everyone.
I'm a piece of shit.
everyone knows it.
I accept it.
sorry.
Reply
YOU ARE NOT A FUCKING DISAPOINTMENT
OR A PIECE OF SHIT!
STOP BEING SO FUCKING NEGATIVE AMAANDA.
if you werent so negative & youd get out and have fun with us.
you would feel so much better!
STOP PUTTING OFF THE "POOR ME" PITTY CASE BULLSHIT.
we are trying to fucking help you
BUT IF YOU DONT WANT IT FINE AMANDA.
you can fucking be like this.
last week we had fun.
we had an incredible night!
you were positive as fuck & taking control of your life.
you were doing amazing.
you were happy!
everything was going great.
stop letting people tear you apart!
stop tearing yourself apart!
your an incredible person.
and an amazing friend.
you just need to get out of this hole!
your not happy....
but if im wrong & you are happy than fine.
tell me your happy & ill leave you alone.
Reply
and no matter how hard I try, I can't be.
I can't stop feeling the way I feel
no matter how much I try and change it, it doesn't stop.
I can pretend, and I can put on a good show... but I always feel like shit.
I'm sorry I bring you all down.
I want to be happy, and I want to hangout with you guys.
I don't know how it will work.
It probably won't ever happen.
...because I like being pathetic and sad.
I wish you guys would have invited me to come last saturday, or any day for that matter.
I usually just sit at home on my days off... but thats ok.
I know I'm a debbie downer.
I'm done.
i feel sick now.
I'm sorry guys.
but I don't know what to do.
Reply
we dont want you sitting home alone all the time.
we dont want you fighting with dane all of the time.
we just dont want you unhappy.
we want you to come.
allie has to be home early too anyway.
its completley up to you though.
we just love you.
ive been trying to help you for months now.
you know that.
but if you dont want the help.
your welcome to say so hun.
Reply
I'm not asking for happiness or perfection right away.
I just want more than what I'm getting out of life.
and I realize that it's mostly my fault that my life is the way it is... but I just can't seem to stop spiraling down.
I'll come.
I'll probably be upset still, my mom is being a bitch still... so sorry.
but I'll come.
Reply
dont ever expect perfection.
my best days are when i expect nothing.
because then any little thing that happens turns into the best
and biggest thing ever and completly makes my day!
youll have fun!
dont worry.
Reply
&happiness is only what you make it.
it's only the worst day of your life if you say it is.
and it's only the best day of your life because you let it be.
please come amanda.
i'll see you at eight.
ps:
i just realized that don't believe in strangers anymore.
thanks for cutting off my arms whitnee.
Reply
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