Comments | mistresswanda: I'm the best worst thing that hasn't happen to you yet!

mistresswanda

I'm the best worst thing that hasn't happen to you yet!

May 21, 2016 22:29

Slipping away from the ball and all the noise,
To a forgotten study down in the dungeon area of the castle.Think it un-nerved Lucien a little as I led him behind a pillar down a side hallway to a hidden door that led to a dusty passageway. Guess he thought I hid away in a corner of the library or a rarely used classroom. I'll never know exactly ( Read more... )

Comments 38

docconstantine May 23 2016, 23:35:04 UTC

We've got to be in one of the oldest parts of the castle, and if the cobwebs are any indication, a very unused one. I'm actually starting to worry that we're lost when Wanda pulls up short in front of a wall. With a small flourish of her wand, a part of the wall swings inward revealing a door I would have never guessed was there in a million years. With a stern warning that I should never try to get in without her, Wanda ducks into the dark before us...

Don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't a full on library from some sort of Victorian ghost story. I would say it's downright creepy and suggest going somewhere else... but it smells like her perfume, and there's familiar art and bands on the stone walls instead of still life's and dour faces... and the little white skulls dotting a large, purple throw pillow seem awfully cheery.

"So... ummmm.... welcome to the Batcave?""You weren't kidding when you said you had a hiding place." I agree, looking around the room again and finding more little touches that make the room seem ( ... )

mistresswanda May 24 2016, 00:25:36 UTC

Watch Lucien's face as he looks around. Feel a bit of relief as his expression changes from 'wary' to 'amused'. I know it's a bit gloomy and a little dark, but it's the closest thing I have to somewhere I feel comfortable in this place. I'd hate for him to completely dislike it.

"And no one knows you're down here? Not even Val?" Lucien asks, flopping down onto my couch and offering me his hand. "The ghosts do, yeah... and the Headmaster, cagey bastard seems to know everything. But... not Val." I muse aloud as my hand slips into his. Instead of pulling me down to sit beside him though, he tugs me down to sit on his lap. Feel myself flushing, but I slip my arms around his neck as his arms encircle my waist. I do like this.

docconstantine May 24 2016, 01:29:28 UTC

Her weight is a comfortable one and I think I could become very used to it. Along with her arms looped easily around my shoulders.

"I get that the ghosts know, and the Headmaster... can't imagine there's anything he doesn't know about what goes on around here." And there's a thought that I didn't need to have. "But... why wouldn't you tell Val?" I inquire, trying to understand her better. "I mean, I'm flattered you thought me worthy enough to bring me down here, but if you and Val are as thick as thieves then why wouldn't you have shared this with him, first?"

mistresswanda May 25 2016, 01:45:24 UTC

"I... you know, I really don't have an answer to that, but then again no one has ever asked the question before." I prattle aloud, playing with a stray lock of hair at the back of his neck as I give it some thought.

"Val belongs here. I don't. He tries... god he tries so hard to make me feel like I fit in here, that it's okay or it all will be... and I try. For him. So I keep going to classes. Keep singing in choir. Keep trying to smile, to not let the little comments and the blatant slurs get to me; try to ignore all the goddamn noise in my head," Close my eyes for a moment and rub the side of temple. "And I am a spectacular failure at it most days, but I keep trying, and when it gets too much and the goddamn noise in my head threatens to drive me over the edge I slip down here. Cause it keeps me sane, the solitude and the quiet. And it makes me feel guilty!" Laugh a little, but it's not a happy sound. "He tries so hard, and I'm still hiding away to keep from getting so miserable again that death seems like a better ( ... )

Thread 19

mistresswanda June 22 2016, 14:37:12 UTC

Oh he's a good teacher. Wonderful teacher. Brilliant. Oh lord, and if he's this good at showing me this, and there's more to learn...

I'm absolutely quivering when he pulls back. It's too much. It's not enough. Can't even think straight but I manage to ask him about the second thing when he stops kissing me. I want to lean in and start again, but he's gone quiet. Really quiet. Manage to drive the haze from my head and realize he's looking at me so oddly. What? What did I do, or not do or not say or...

"Lucien?"

"Is that it's so wonderful 'cause... we were always meant to be together."No. What? No. That's just absurd. You only read about this, it doesn't actually happen!... does it? Maybe it does, but not to weird little girls who talk to dead people ( ... )

docconstantine June 25 2016, 20:48:37 UTC

Realize once she's up and put distance between us that this... us, is going to be a lot of work.

Realize a second later that I want to work for it... us.

Push myself up and rid myself of the damn formal robe before crossing the room. I want to take her into my arms and drive that miserable look off her face; but I opt to lean against the desk alongside her instead.

"If it's any consolation... I have no idea what I'm doing either. Just kinda winging it as I go," I admit as I look up at the ceiling above my head. "Guess it would be too easy if there were a instruction manual, eh?" I nudge her shoulder with mine and manage to get a small snicker for my efforts.

I'm sorry... I didn't mean... well, I meant..." Trip over my words, cause I really didn't want to freak her out but I did mean it, that I feel like we're meant---

"How I feel about you... overwhelms me." Wanda's not looking at her shoes anymore, but kinda sideways at me. Still can't read her, though. "Maybe it would be easier if I were to say to hell with it and ( ... )

mistresswanda June 25 2016, 22:17:31 UTC

"How I feel about you... overwhelms me."

Okay... so I'm not alone in being freaked out by this. Good to know.

"I want to give this... us, a try. It won't be easy... I get that... but I don't want easy. I want something more... something that'll take work. Something worth the trying for, and I believe, truly believe that you're 'her'."

...........What?

Jesus Bloody Wept! I'm 'her'??? No. No I can't be! I'm not meant for anyone, especially the hottest boy in school who is gonna be the next big Quidditch star! I'm just the spooky girl who talks to dead kids and has to be watched by the damn Ministry in case I raise a army of corpses or turn into the next Dark Lord and would have been better off if I had just died that night---

"What's going through your head right now?"

Look down at his hand on top of mine.

"I..." Oh god. "I don't..." Turn my hand upright and thread my fingers thru his. "I... I want to try... I'm just scared of the day you'll realize I'm not worth the effort."

docconstantine June 26 2016, 02:19:16 UTC

Wanda's pale and trembling, and looks like she might burst into tears at any second... but she's still standing beside me and is back to holding my hand.

"Maybe you'll realize I'm not worth the effort." I offer as a way to lighten the mood. "Mean... you yourself called me a idiot, and Kate swears I am insufferable and I have the ability to yammer on incessantly about Quidditch..." She's shaking her head and chuckling now, so I squeeze her hand and give her a smile.

"So. What do you think? Am I worth taking a gamble on?"

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