In the dark. [1/3]
Title: In the dark. [1/3]
Pairing: Jongkey.
Genre: Mostly angst.
Rating: PG-13 to be safe.
Warnings: Implied character death.
Summary: Key is planning to kill himself- until he meets Jonghyun, unexpectedly. Together they plan a joint suicide. The more Key gets to know him- the more he realizes that he's the only reason he wants to be alive.
He didn't want to live anymore.
Kibum. He thought it was a stupid name, he preferred Key, mainly because it sounded cool and it was English. English. He cared too much about details. Especially today- clutching his Balmain wallet (which he had spent way too much on), he sauntered through the mall. Saturday. The day he used to spend watching cartoons, when he was five. He rolled his eyes at the childish thought and browsed through the clothing racks. Funny. Shopping was the only other thing that made him happy, besides injecting god knows what into himself. If I die, then I want to die fashionable, he thought.
How long had these scars been on his arms? The injection spots, the slashes from the blades of something sharp. It didn't matter. He had too many to count, and he couldn't remember which memory went with which. It was a blur he lived in, everyday, school, taunting about his scars, and about his orientation. It seemed like he would be better off dead.
and that's when he got the idea.
"Suicide, the action of killing oneself intentionally." Key repeated aloud, as he pressed the kleenex against his wrist, a habit that had grown oh too common. It wasn't surprising that as the kleenex grew a deeper red, he liked the idea of death. It's what cutting always did for him- not even a huge dose of crack, or whatever he injected, could make him feel this high.
When did this boy join his class? Key had a vague memory of him, walking in late, standing out with his two-tone blonde hair. It appealed to him, somehow. Key liked thinking about random things when he felt depressed. This new boy didn't talk often- apart from when the teachers asked him a question or something. He didn't know whether to like this newcomer or not- Kibum judged everyone right from the start.
As Key ignored the taunting of his newest shirt when he walked into history class, he sat way at the back, which ensured him from any social contact from anyone he hated. The new boy stepped in, looking like a lost puppy.
"Mind if I sit here?" Key glanced up, surprised. He'd been too immersed in thinking to notice the new boy was right in front of him. His voice... Let's just say, Kibum could drown in it. It was amazing.
"Er- yeah, go ahead." Kibum replied, before remembering to pull up his sleeves quickly. After all, he wanted to make friends with this new boy and having both arms filled with cuts wasn't the greatest thing to start off with.
But then- he noticed.
What was this? Alright, it was pretty hot outside, so it wasn't surprising that the other boy was wearing a t-shirt. But what caught his eye- was a few fresh cuts.
"You cut yourself?" Key was quick to jump to conclusions, and this was one of those times.
"These?" The new boy laughed awkwardly as he directed to his cuts. "My dog scratched me. It's nothing." But Key knew it wasn't his dog. Those cuts were vaguely familiar- oh wait, he had arms full of them. Their eyes met, and instantly Key knew his secret.
"I'm Jonghyun."
"I'm Ki- Key. Call me Key."
It seemed like this boy had been in his life forever. Jonghyun matched every interest- Key knew they also shared the interest of death. Oh, how ironic. This didn't bother the both of them- Jonghyun had no idea that Key even knew his secret.
It was rather cool out, but it was Friday night, and Key absolutely refused to be alone on a Friday night like this. He barely had any friends- so this was definitely an opportunity he wasn't going to refuse.
So here he was, in a tent with Jonghyun, camping out in his backyard. It seemed to childish, but Jonghyun liked the idea. The faint glow of the lamplight seemed to cast a glow that made Key excited- after all, it was late and being here with a friend for once made him happy.
"I brought these, they're sparklers." Jonghyun pulled out a few, and showed them to Key. Oh, how well he knew him. He quickly turned off the electric lamp, and pulled out a lighter, before gently directing one of them towards the small flame. It burst into a shower of sparks, and Key grinned. This was dangerous- but he didn't care at all. In fact, he felt far from scared.
"Don't touch it!" Key exclaimed as Jonghyun touched the sparks that emitted from it, and grinned.
"It doesn't burn you." Jjong replied, as he led the sparks down his arms, illuminating the many scars he had.
"So you do cut yourself." Key simply stared at him, and Jonghyun didn't answer, as he stared at the now slowly fading sparks that eventually just dissolved into the darkness of the night.
"That's not an answer." Kibum added, and Jonghyun looked at him.
"So you've figured out my secret."
"What if I said I had the same one?"
The darkness didn't block out the clear look of surprise in the other boy's eyes.
"What, that you don't want to live anymore?" Jonghyun muttered, as he shifted uncomfortably. Clearly he wasn't taking Key seriously.
"Exactly."
"Me either."
Silence for a moment.
"You don't have to go alone." Jonghyun said suddenly.
"What, to where?" This was all too confusing.
"We can die... together." This promise, this hope of at least being with someone after leaving this world of darkness. It seemed so tempting.
"Together." Key agreed, and held Jonghyun's hand tightly, afraid that if he let go, he'd be left behind, in this world of lies, hurt, and truth.
Even in the dark, it wasn't hard for Key to know that this was the person he'd been waiting for all along.
Their lips met, and an unfamiliar warmth filled them.
Pairing: Jongkey.
Genre: Mostly angst.
Rating: PG-13 to be safe.
Warnings: Implied character death.
Summary: Key is planning to kill himself- until he meets Jonghyun, unexpectedly. Together they plan a joint suicide. The more Key gets to know him- the more he realizes that he's the only reason he wants to be alive.
He didn't want to live anymore.
Kibum. He thought it was a stupid name, he preferred Key, mainly because it sounded cool and it was English. English. He cared too much about details. Especially today- clutching his Balmain wallet (which he had spent way too much on), he sauntered through the mall. Saturday. The day he used to spend watching cartoons, when he was five. He rolled his eyes at the childish thought and browsed through the clothing racks. Funny. Shopping was the only other thing that made him happy, besides injecting god knows what into himself. If I die, then I want to die fashionable, he thought.
How long had these scars been on his arms? The injection spots, the slashes from the blades of something sharp. It didn't matter. He had too many to count, and he couldn't remember which memory went with which. It was a blur he lived in, everyday, school, taunting about his scars, and about his orientation. It seemed like he would be better off dead.
and that's when he got the idea.
"Suicide, the action of killing oneself intentionally." Key repeated aloud, as he pressed the kleenex against his wrist, a habit that had grown oh too common. It wasn't surprising that as the kleenex grew a deeper red, he liked the idea of death. It's what cutting always did for him- not even a huge dose of crack, or whatever he injected, could make him feel this high.
When did this boy join his class? Key had a vague memory of him, walking in late, standing out with his two-tone blonde hair. It appealed to him, somehow. Key liked thinking about random things when he felt depressed. This new boy didn't talk often- apart from when the teachers asked him a question or something. He didn't know whether to like this newcomer or not- Kibum judged everyone right from the start.
As Key ignored the taunting of his newest shirt when he walked into history class, he sat way at the back, which ensured him from any social contact from anyone he hated. The new boy stepped in, looking like a lost puppy.
"Mind if I sit here?" Key glanced up, surprised. He'd been too immersed in thinking to notice the new boy was right in front of him. His voice... Let's just say, Kibum could drown in it. It was amazing.
"Er- yeah, go ahead." Kibum replied, before remembering to pull up his sleeves quickly. After all, he wanted to make friends with this new boy and having both arms filled with cuts wasn't the greatest thing to start off with.
But then- he noticed.
What was this? Alright, it was pretty hot outside, so it wasn't surprising that the other boy was wearing a t-shirt. But what caught his eye- was a few fresh cuts.
"You cut yourself?" Key was quick to jump to conclusions, and this was one of those times.
"These?" The new boy laughed awkwardly as he directed to his cuts. "My dog scratched me. It's nothing." But Key knew it wasn't his dog. Those cuts were vaguely familiar- oh wait, he had arms full of them. Their eyes met, and instantly Key knew his secret.
"I'm Jonghyun."
"I'm Ki- Key. Call me Key."
It seemed like this boy had been in his life forever. Jonghyun matched every interest- Key knew they also shared the interest of death. Oh, how ironic. This didn't bother the both of them- Jonghyun had no idea that Key even knew his secret.
It was rather cool out, but it was Friday night, and Key absolutely refused to be alone on a Friday night like this. He barely had any friends- so this was definitely an opportunity he wasn't going to refuse.
So here he was, in a tent with Jonghyun, camping out in his backyard. It seemed to childish, but Jonghyun liked the idea. The faint glow of the lamplight seemed to cast a glow that made Key excited- after all, it was late and being here with a friend for once made him happy.
"I brought these, they're sparklers." Jonghyun pulled out a few, and showed them to Key. Oh, how well he knew him. He quickly turned off the electric lamp, and pulled out a lighter, before gently directing one of them towards the small flame. It burst into a shower of sparks, and Key grinned. This was dangerous- but he didn't care at all. In fact, he felt far from scared.
"Don't touch it!" Key exclaimed as Jonghyun touched the sparks that emitted from it, and grinned.
"It doesn't burn you." Jjong replied, as he led the sparks down his arms, illuminating the many scars he had.
"So you do cut yourself." Key simply stared at him, and Jonghyun didn't answer, as he stared at the now slowly fading sparks that eventually just dissolved into the darkness of the night.
"That's not an answer." Kibum added, and Jonghyun looked at him.
"So you've figured out my secret."
"What if I said I had the same one?"
The darkness didn't block out the clear look of surprise in the other boy's eyes.
"What, that you don't want to live anymore?" Jonghyun muttered, as he shifted uncomfortably. Clearly he wasn't taking Key seriously.
"Exactly."
"Me either."
Silence for a moment.
"You don't have to go alone." Jonghyun said suddenly.
"What, to where?" This was all too confusing.
"We can die... together." This promise, this hope of at least being with someone after leaving this world of darkness. It seemed so tempting.
"Together." Key agreed, and held Jonghyun's hand tightly, afraid that if he let go, he'd be left behind, in this world of lies, hurt, and truth.
Even in the dark, it wasn't hard for Key to know that this was the person he'd been waiting for all along.
Their lips met, and an unfamiliar warmth filled them.