Coffee Break
Title: Coffee Break
Author: keepthexfaith
Pairing: GabexMikey
Rating: M
Disclaimer: Not real, obviously. A figment of my imagination.
Warnings:
Almost!Sex
Language
Coffee Break
Like every weekday morning, Mikey woke up at exactly 7:30am to the sound of a cheap alarm whining into his ear. He sat up and hit at the object making the offending noise until it silenced, then yawned and shifted around to face the other person occupying his bed.
"Gabe. Gabe, wake up." He muttered, sleep making his voice hoarse as he shook the other man's shoulder gently. Gabe rolled onto his back, looked up at Mikey and like every morning, he was taken aback by the dark shadows under the other man's eyes.
"Not asleep." He murmured back softly, voice hoarse for the opposite reason.
"Again?" Mikey sighed quietly and lay back down, settling contently against Gabe's warm body and curling his fingers around his wrist loosely. They lay in silence for a while, neither quite comfortable with the quiet that summed up all the unsaid problems. Mikey's silences, as usual, meant that his mind was screaming, thoughts flooding and swarming beyond breaking point. On the other hand, Gabe's silences just meant that he was doing anything possible to keep the thoughts out of his mind. He took a sharp breath in and Mikey's eyes darted up to meet the others hopefully, but then Gabe just exhaled wordlessly, and Mikey visibly deflated.
"We'll be late for work..." He said quietly, watching as Gave nodded and sat up, leaning over and pressing a light kiss to the corner of Mikey's lips.
"You're right. C'mon, you can shower first. I'll go make us coffee."
And like every morning, Gabe left the bedroom first, leaving Mikey alone to deal with the storm of thoughts that he couldn't seem to push away.
~
Gabe's day passed like any other - a blur of nameless faces, faceless names and enough phone calls to make his ears buzz. His twenty minute break that he received daily was wasted in the closest Starbucks to his work, phone andBlackberry switched off. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk to people. He'd love to call Mikey and see how his day was going, or maybe text Pete so that they could actually catch up like they always said they needed to. The reason why Gabe isolated himself from the constant vibrating of phone calls, texts and emails was so that he could actually take a moment to breathe. Everything seemed to be passing him by so fast these days - work, friends, family - he needed this daily coffee break to pause for once. He just wanted to be able to take it all in. It was odd, he had all this time to think and contemplate while the rest of the town slept, but all he ever found himself doing at night was hoping, fucking praying even, that he could just fall asleep like everyone else did. Mikey looked so peaceful when he slept, so quiet and still, but Gabe's nights just consisted of tossing, turning and sighing.
He huddled up over the dregs of his now cold coffee, poking holes in the top of the paper cup with his car keys, waiting for some kind of epiphany. He didn't think he could take one more sleepless night. Glancing at his watch, he exhaled slowly and pushed his chair back. Dumping his loose change into the tip jar, he tugged his jacket around himself and braved the cold weather outside. His epiphany would have to wait until tomorrows break, evidently. Walking down the street, back up to the building he grudgingly referred to as work, he wondered when it was exactly that he'd lost his will to keep going.
And like every working day, at exactly 2:18pm, Gabe pushed the door of his office block open, and made his way back into hell.
~
Mikey's trip home was long, uneventful and frankly, incredibly dull. It was the kind of trip that was so mind-numbingly boring that anything could distract him. Today, Mikey's distraction seemed to be a large, matronly woman and her two children. The little girl was the image of her mother, with the cliched angelic look that only blonde, blue eyed girls of about eight or nine could really perfect, but it was the little boy that intrigued him. The polar opposite of the girl sitting next to him, the boy had messy dark hair, brown eyes, and a fiercely determined expression that in a scary way, reminded him of Gabe. 'Holy shit' he thought, blinking and tearing his eyes away from the family, 'that's...just weird'. His eyes remained firmly focused on the window, convinced that he was losing it. Evidently he really did need to stop working so much. Still, it was Friday, and that meant that him and Gabe were going out for the night. They had a ritual of sorts going, and had kept to it every week without fail for the last year and a half. Every Friday night they would go out somewhere together, just the two of them, no matter how tired (usually Gabe) or how behind at work (usually Mikey) they were. This week it was Gabe's choice, so Mikey was almost certain this meant that they were headed to the new Chinese restaurant that had opened down near their apartment. He smiled slightly to himself as he got off the bus and started walking home, slightly faster now that he had remembered he had something to look forward to.
Working in the city meant a trip home that most would call excessive - a train, ferry and bus ride, not to mention the twenty minute walk tagged onto that - but he felt it was worth it. He loved his job, and he loved getting home after the tedious commute he endured each day. It made unlocking the front door and collapsing straight onto their old sofa that much more satisfying. Practically jogging now, Mikey sent Gabe a quick text to let him know he was almost home, and to unnecessarily remind him what day it was.
'I know. I'll be waiting. x' was the simple reply, and as Mikey unlocked their front door, rushing inside and glancing around for the other, he could help but smile. Like every Friday, the first thing he did was walk up to Gabe, slide his arms around his waist and lean up onto his toes, mumbling softly against his ear.
"I love you."
~
Friday nights were something the both of them looked forward to. They alternated each week, and even though the both of them were incredibly predictable with their choices, it was still the best part of the working week. Mikey's choices usually revolved around various night clubs and bars, whereas Gabe had a weakness for haunting new restaurants, so when Gabe came out with his choice for this week, he could tell that Mikey was pretty shocked.
"The Court." He said with a small shrug, picking casually at his nail, trademark smirk spreading across his face at the confused look that seemed to be stuck on Mikey's face. The Court was a bar that they'd been to a few months back, and clearly Mikey hadn't been expecting they'd be going there this week at any rate.
"What?" Mikey blinked, shook his head a little, then added, "Are you sure?" Gabe just laughed and pulled the other man closer to him.
"Mikey, Mikey, Mikey. You know me. Would I really be saying it if I didn't mean it?" He leant down and nudged Mikey's cheek lightly with his own as he chuckled into his ear, and when Mikey's reply came, a soft 'no', he grinned slightly and kissed his cheek. "Perfect, now c'mon. Get ready, I'll make us coffee."
When he finally managed to drag Mikey away from the hot irons and coffee cup, Gabe lead him downstairs to the front of their apartment building, where he had told the taxi to pick them up from. Mikey started suggesting one of them drive, but he quickly silenced him, shaking his head and laughing a little.
"Mikes. Tonight, we're getting wasted." He said, a little glint in his eye as he looked at Mikey, grinning as the other seemed to brighten up a little himself. After an awkward moment with the taxi driver - he'd pulled up during a fleeting make out session and had resorted to beeping the horn embarrassingly loudly to get their attention. After a lot of flustered apologies and a ridiculously large tip - the driver must have been thanking the higher powers for ending up with them - they finally made it into the bar.
Drinks were ordered, knocked back at rates that were almost inhuman and within two hours Gave had ignored Mikey's weak protests and dragged him out to what they assumed to be a makeshift dance floor. Wrapping an arm around his waist and holding him close enough that he couldn't escape, Gabe grinned slightly and leant in closer to Mikey.
"You're drunk," he muttered, conveniently ignoring the tell-tale slur in his own voice as he said this.
"Look who's talking!" Mikey laughed, sipping at the glass he still had in his hand. Their gaze met and Gabe noticed how Mikey was studying him closely; it was weird, but it sort of unsettled him a little. Almost like, if Mikey looked too hard, he'd see all that stuff that Gabe tried to keep to himself
"What?"
Mikey didn't answer for a while, and Gabe was going to make some joking comment about how he thought too much for a drink, but something kept him quiet, waiting for his reply.
"How come you wanted to come here tonight?"
Well, he hadn't expected that to be what Mikey was contemplating for so long, and the question threw him off a little, which ended up in him just blurting out the first excuse that came to mind.
"I knew you wanted to come here?" It was a lie, and a terrible one at that, but apparently it was good enough because Mikey bought it without question. He just smirked a bit before leaning into Gabe and discarding his now empty glass, touching his chest lightly.
"Wanna head home?" Gabe started to protest that they didn't have to go just yet, they hadn't been there that long, but then he took a second glance at Mikey and just nodded quickly as he grabbed the others hand.
It turned out that calling a cab while wasted was actually a lot harder than it was sober, and after the third attempt they just gave up and started walking. Their apartment was only ten minutes away; Gabe was just really lazy when he wanted to be, especially when drunk. Despite the cold weather, the walk did very little to sober either of them up, and when they stumbled up the stairs - probably waking most of their neighbours in the process - Mikey latched onto Gabe's waist, watching as he tried (and failed) to open the door, snickering softly as Gabe swore in frustration.
"Fine, smart ass, you do it!" He insisted, shoving the key into Mikey's hand and adding a muttered 'fuck you' as he got it into the door and open in one try. They both walked in, and as soon as the front door was shut again an unspoken signal of some sorts seemed to pass between them. Mikey moved first, tugging his shirt over his head as Gabe kicked his shoes off, leading Mikey into the bedroom by his belt and struggling to get his own off one handed.
Mikey stripped off and settled on the bed facing Gabe, who pulled his own shirt off quickly and moving to join him on the bed, pausing as Mikey burst into giggles for what felt like the hundredth time that night.
"What?" He murmured into his ear huskily, pushing Mikey back so that he was lying now and leaning down into him, nipping at his jaw line even as Mikey kept giggling in his ear.
"Gabe. Gabe, you're.." He was really struggling to get it out, but finally took a deep breath and looked up at him, dead serious. "You're still wearing your socks."
There was silence in the room; Gabe didn't react at all for a moment - and really, how did someone react to a statement like that? Then something caught his eye, and he glanced down the bed before catching hold of Mikey's legs.
"...Mikes. So are you!" And apparently this was hilarious, because the both of them burst into laughter, and Gave sat up to remove the offending socks, leaning over awkwardly and trying to avoid overbalancing or the laughter would never end. By the time he looked back, Mikey had fallen asleep. He couldn't help but smile at this, and as he watched the other tiredness seemed to suddenly smack into him like a sack of rocks. He meant to grab the covers and pull them up. Instead he just settled himself next to Mikey and pretty much passed out within seconds.
~
Monday morning came and like every weekday, the sound of their crappy alarm made Mikey wake up with a jump. He let out a muffled noise of protest and rolled over. Not even bothering to tell Gabe to wake up, he just slipped an arm around his waist and cuddled up to him tiredly, just as whiny as he was every Monday.
"Do I have to go work today?" He murmured through a yawn, a smile curling the corners of his mouth as he heard Gabe chuckling under his breath.
"Yes, Mikes. We have to work." Gabe shifted around so he could see Mikey, who just leant in and kissed him lightly, choosing to ignore Gabe's muffled comment about morning breath. He just tightened his arms around him until the other stayed still, watching him quietly then. Their eyes met and idiotic smiles suddenly spread over both of their faces, the moment reminding Mikey of when he was a teenager and dating for the first time.
"So, Gabe." He started off softly, a little unsure if he was honest. It wasn't like thought Gabe wouldn't talk to him, but he doubted he would really want to. What he really wanted to avoid was the moments where Gabe just shut down, giving up on the conversation and ending it on his terms, when he decided he'd had enough.
Gabe shifted onto his side, propped up on one elbow, and Mikey moved in closer almost like reflex, settling against him comfortably and nuzzling his head into the place where his neck and shoulder met, so he could whisper and Gabe would still hear.
"You always look so...sad. In the mornings. But today...you're not. How come?"
Gabe went quiet for a while, clearly thinking hard about how he was going to answer the question. This could be good, it meant it was more likely to be honest. Or possibly a better lie, but Mikey could only hope for the first. Finally, he pulled Mikey closer and hugged him tight, pressing his lips to the side of his head gently.
"I dreamt." Mikey frowned, not understanding where this was going, but he nodded and stayed silent anyway, waiting for more, "Friday night. Normally, when I actually do get some sleep...it's good, but not great, y'know?"
Something seemed to click then, and Mikey glanced up. "So...you had a dream Friday night? Are you still taking your pills?" Gabe smiled and shook his head quickly.
"Nah, not for a while now. I probably won't have a night like that for a while. But it was enough. It gave me something to..." He paused, breathed out slowly, then just shrugged and smiled. "S'alright. I know what I mean. That's enough for me." He squeezed Mikey's hand lightly, kissed him softly then sat up, shifting out of the bed. "C'mon, you can shower first. I'll make coffee."
He started to leave, but Mikey got up quickly and wrapped his arms around his waist, pressing up close behind him and whispering softly, "I get it." He started walking them forward, guiding him towards the bedroom door, "With the dreams, you've got somewhere to hide again." He brushed his fingers over Gabe's stomach lightly, leant up to kiss his cheek, then ducked out from behind him, opening the door.
"Showering can wait; lets make coffee."
For the first time in weeks, Mikey and Gabe left the bedroom together.
~
The day passed slowly for Gabe, connecting calls and finishing up old paperwork. It was a horribly basic day and by the time 2 o' clock and his daily coffee break came along, Gabe could barely get out of the office fast enough, jumping out of his seat as soon as his boss gave him the nod.
The daily ritual didn't change - his phones, iPods, everything went off - and he took up his usual seat with the usual paper and his usual coffee. Everything about the day was mundane. Except for that morning. He thought back to what Mikey had said, 'you've got somewhere to hide'. He was surprised by just how much this made sense to him, honestly. Mikey had managed to take everything he had been feeling the last couple of months, and sum it up in nine words. It was unsettling - no one had even known him that well - but it was also a relief. Someone got him. Finally.
Slouching slightly in his seat, he swirled his coffee around, staring into the liquid lazily as his thoughts consumed him. It had been so long since he'd slept like that, really slept. Most nights were unbearable - he would drift in and out all night without any hope of some real rest, but Friday night's dream confirmed to him that he had actually slept. And Mikey had seen it, he had noticed the difference. A slight smile crept up onto his face, and before Gabe knew it his twenty minutes had passed by in a blur of Mikey-related thoughts and three cups of coffee.
This part always brought him down, though. He stood up and it was like someone had flicked off a light switch, the change was that sudden. He sighed slightly, smile wiped off his face immediately as he followed his usual ritual - cups in the bin, loose change in the tip jar, nod to the barista and he was out. Despite the unseasonably mild weather, he still drew his jacket up around himself out of habit as he made his way back to the office building. Fishing around in his bag for his phone, his fingers brushed over a small cardboard box. He pulled it out - it was the sleeping pills he'd been prescribed months ago. Shrugging slightly to himself more than anything, he just shoved them in his pockets and located the object he'd wanted all along, the phone. Switching it on, he started walking up the stairs slowly now, but he paused at the door as his phone buzzed to indicate a message. It was from Mikey.
"I'll write you a lullaby. x"
And for the first working day day in two years, at exactly 2:18pm, Gabe pushed the door of his office block open, smiling as he made his way back into hell.