execute strongbadwritesameme.exe
This is for juicify's drabble meme. Normally, I would kill it with my awesome powers, but this was too good to pass up!
The wiggly wiener was walking down into a mine shaft, because he is dumb and has stupid legs.
"Oh, I have stupid legs!" said Strong Sad.
Suddenly, superhero Strong Bad appeared, shiny and buff and partially nude, because he is just that cool. "You're right!" he said, pulling a chainsaw from his pocket. "Your legs are stupid! Let me take care of that!"
Stupid Strong Sad lay himself on the floor, grey legs sticking up into the air. "Oh no, here go my stupid legs!"
Four teenage girls came onto the scene and the really ugly one who suddenly turned whoa hot said "let's eat his legs!"
"Possums?" asked What's-Her-Face.
"Shut up and hand me the fork," said Cheerleader.
And they all feasted. And Strong Sad died of blood loss. Oh and his legs too.
"I'm lame and gross and not nearly as cool as Strong Bad or even The Cheat," sang Strong Sad as he took the cake out of the oven. It was decorated with hearts and angels and all this calligraphy that wasn't as cool unless it was on a cake specifically for me...I mean, Strong Bad.
A voodoo man appeared and ate the cake. He pointed at Strong Sad and said "you die now!" And then Strong Sad went "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!"
...and then he went "ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!"
And then the knife attacked him and he was dead and bloody and hahaha, oh man, so awesome.
Strong Bad - the super-awesome - waited around the corner with The Cheat. Strong Mad leaned across them, trying to be quiet, but not really doing it. They watched the red frosting and the single, lit candle decorated with sparkles and glitter that The Cheat had put on there as a last-minute enticement.
"Five...four...three..."
Strong Sad bit down.
"...two...one..."
Strong Sad exploded.
And there was much rejoicing.
"What a great movie!" said Strong Sad as Fear flickered ominously across the screen. His virtual reality helmet was stuck on his stupid head. He ate his popcorn, muttering about things that don't matter and no one cares about, because he's got big ol' elephant legs.
"I'm going to kill you!" said Mark Whalberg. A knife flashed, not possessed this time, Mark Whalberg's arm stretching out of the TV screen.
Strong Sad continued to munch on his popcorn. "This just got good!"
"DIE!!!!" said Mark Whalberg, with all those extra exclamation points. His big nife flashed darkly and stabbed Strong Sad in the forehead.
"Oh no!" said Strong Sad.
"Haha!" said Strong Bad.
"Who the hell are you?" asked Mark Whalberg over his shoulder as he continued to stab the unconscious figure.
"Um...the king of awesome," said Strong Bad. "I have to go now."
Mark Whalberg shrugged. "Hey, I killed an elephant with my bare hands! Go me!"
"And then I went to the bank and they told me that I needed a credit card to open an account and then I said, 'well, I'm not authorised to - "
"Strong Sad?"
" - have one of those and Strong Bad keeps taking mine and - "
"Strong Sad!"
" - shoves me in the dirt and won't let me hug trees and sometimes he tells me that - "
Ninja stars flew. Strong Sad spurted blood.
"I can't believe I shared my Tofu Happy Surprise recipe with him," she said as he fell dead to the floor. With more blood spurting everywhere and landing on a cashier with a blue face and tacky orange attire.
The wiggly wiener was walking down into a mine shaft, because he is dumb and has stupid legs.
"Oh, I have stupid legs!" said Strong Sad.
Suddenly, superhero Strong Bad appeared, shiny and buff and partially nude, because he is just that cool. "You're right!" he said, pulling a chainsaw from his pocket. "Your legs are stupid! Let me take care of that!"
Stupid Strong Sad lay himself on the floor, grey legs sticking up into the air. "Oh no, here go my stupid legs!"
Four teenage girls came onto the scene and the really ugly one who suddenly turned whoa hot said "let's eat his legs!"
"Possums?" asked What's-Her-Face.
"Shut up and hand me the fork," said Cheerleader.
And they all feasted. And Strong Sad died of blood loss. Oh and his legs too.
"I'm lame and gross and not nearly as cool as Strong Bad or even The Cheat," sang Strong Sad as he took the cake out of the oven. It was decorated with hearts and angels and all this calligraphy that wasn't as cool unless it was on a cake specifically for me...I mean, Strong Bad.
A voodoo man appeared and ate the cake. He pointed at Strong Sad and said "you die now!" And then Strong Sad went "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!"
...and then he went "ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!"
And then the knife attacked him and he was dead and bloody and hahaha, oh man, so awesome.
Strong Bad - the super-awesome - waited around the corner with The Cheat. Strong Mad leaned across them, trying to be quiet, but not really doing it. They watched the red frosting and the single, lit candle decorated with sparkles and glitter that The Cheat had put on there as a last-minute enticement.
"Five...four...three..."
Strong Sad bit down.
"...two...one..."
Strong Sad exploded.
And there was much rejoicing.
"What a great movie!" said Strong Sad as Fear flickered ominously across the screen. His virtual reality helmet was stuck on his stupid head. He ate his popcorn, muttering about things that don't matter and no one cares about, because he's got big ol' elephant legs.
"I'm going to kill you!" said Mark Whalberg. A knife flashed, not possessed this time, Mark Whalberg's arm stretching out of the TV screen.
Strong Sad continued to munch on his popcorn. "This just got good!"
"DIE!!!!" said Mark Whalberg, with all those extra exclamation points. His big nife flashed darkly and stabbed Strong Sad in the forehead.
"Oh no!" said Strong Sad.
"Haha!" said Strong Bad.
"Who the hell are you?" asked Mark Whalberg over his shoulder as he continued to stab the unconscious figure.
"Um...the king of awesome," said Strong Bad. "I have to go now."
Mark Whalberg shrugged. "Hey, I killed an elephant with my bare hands! Go me!"
"And then I went to the bank and they told me that I needed a credit card to open an account and then I said, 'well, I'm not authorised to - "
"Strong Sad?"
" - have one of those and Strong Bad keeps taking mine and - "
"Strong Sad!"
" - shoves me in the dirt and won't let me hug trees and sometimes he tells me that - "
Ninja stars flew. Strong Sad spurted blood.
"I can't believe I shared my Tofu Happy Surprise recipe with him," she said as he fell dead to the floor. With more blood spurting everywhere and landing on a cashier with a blue face and tacky orange attire.