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harmony_bites July 13 2007, 00:58:40 UTC
The only overall crit I can think of is that often people aren't grabbled by a fic that starts with a long stretch of narrative w/o much action, dialogue, character interaction--but I felt your voice and little details here and there--(like the potpouri, the look at Snape's thinking, tiny hints even early of a mystery) carried it through and it just got more gripping as it went ( ... )

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mollilicious July 13 2007, 01:31:26 UTC
Thank you! I really appreciate your feedback, and I agree that it's a flaw in the story. I'm not used to writing things this short, and I think that showed in this regard and in some other ways.

I congratulate you on coming back from that experience and I think you should not sell yourself short -- your exchange fic was much more than merely unembarrassing and definitely ranks amongst my favorites both for the quality of the writing and for the fact that I am much in sympathy with your characterization.

I'm completely unfamiliar with the Trek fandom, but I would guess from your name that you're a Buffy fan? Have you written anything in that fandom?

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harmony_bites July 13 2007, 01:44:42 UTC
I basically like a Hermione and Snape as equals--and not even many celebrated writers in the ship deliver that--often either Hermione is a suped up Mary Sue or a ... well "fuckwit" is one term I've heard used that unfortunately resonates, so yeah, I was happy your Hermione wasn't clueless. And the Snape is either made too warm and fuzzy for words or outright predatory--which I was afraid your fic was going for until you managed to carry off that twist ( ... )

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mollilicious July 13 2007, 02:10:24 UTC
Ooooohhhh -- would be grateful for a link to good Buffy fic. *pleads*

One of my regrets about this story was that I didn't get a chance to deliver any Hermione POV although I hoped that I'd made her worthy in the little schnibbles that the reader gets of her. So, basically, yay.

Considering that my own "significant other" is twenty years my senior I'm perfectly fine with the SS/HG dynamic. While it's true that we didn't meet when I was a teenager, I still feel that I get where the whole thing is coming from.

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ubiquirk July 13 2007, 01:44:11 UTC
I wanted to say that I loved the way you kept the POV so tightly SS's and then had the reveal towards the end that HG knew what was happening. I also agree that lush writing wouldn't have worked here - a plotting Snape does not wax lyrical!

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mollilicious July 13 2007, 02:13:09 UTC
Thanks!

It was very difficult for me... I have a really hard time writing drabbles, even, that's how attached I am to my verbosity... so I'm so glad that it worked in the end.

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duniazade July 13 2007, 11:34:00 UTC
I loved "Better Living Through Potions". I thought it was one of the most original stories in the exchange, both in plot (a double reversal: Hermione knows what's going on, Snape doesn't really know what he's doing) and in imagery (the statue idea seemed bizarre at the first glance, but then made perfect sense as metaphor of petrified sentiment, and also played with echos from "A Winter's Tale").

I've friended you, I hope you don't mind. You made a kind comment on my own fic (A Spider Book).

If you're still interested in discussing writing, I'm sure I'll be right back for it - I'm fascinated by the process. I have almost the opposite problem, meaning I'm usually too concise and can't bring myself to develop, and then there's that strange twist, for me, of writing in my third language (I'm a French/Romanian bilingual, but Spider Book was the first fic (or text of more than one page) that I've ever written in English). I'm looking forward to many, many discussions.

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mollilicious July 14 2007, 13:37:19 UTC
I am always open to new friends! I'm friending you back, of course. :)

"A Spider Book" is on my list of favorites from the Exchange. I'd never read anything quite like it before and I thought the plot and the imagery were really original and well done. I'm quite surprised to hear that it's your first fic in English -- I never would have guessed!!!

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duniazade July 14 2007, 14:12:29 UTC
Beginner's luck, I suppose... Thank you very much anyway!

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