monkytrainr

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monkytrainr May 26, 2006 01:05

I have decided that insomnia is the loneliest feeling in the world ( Read more... )

(Untitled)

monkytrainr May 15, 2006 16:20

I'm still alive!
I got out of rehab Wednesday night.
And I'm feeling really, really good.

The people in my abnormal psych class are grossly inappropriate.
Please, please, please do not bring up your personal issues in the middle of class. It makes things incredibly awkward for everyone else. I don't care if you have a pseudo-OCD trait or two. I don't care if you were in a dependant relationship for seven years. I don't care if your ( Read more... )

one of my favorite contemporary poems

monkytrainr Mar 29, 2006 00:29

The Bluebirdthere's a bluebird in my heart that ( Read more... )

poetry

drug addicts and normies

monkytrainr Mar 20, 2006 23:00

I'd just like to say this:

There is a difference between being sober and just not using or drinking. People who are sober, according to my definition, are addicts and alcoholics who are trying desperately to stay clean and sober. Every second of every day, they want to drink and use so badly that it's almost physically painful. They know how it ( Read more... )

aa

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monkytrainr Mar 13, 2006 16:20

Last night I spent about an hour driving around speaking continuously into a tape recorder, trying to clear my head ( Read more... )

quizzes

monkytrainr Mar 10, 2006 13:54

( I'll cut for the sake of your friends' page )

quizzes

Don't think for one fucking instant / that I don't have a broken heart

monkytrainr Mar 08, 2006 17:09

What people think of me is none of my business. It's their business, and their business alone. I've finally come to accept that. I cannot manipulate people's perception of me. All I can change are my own actions and my own honesty.

( we need a god who bleeds now )

poetry

I'm sorry for the way I am

monkytrainr Mar 02, 2006 14:31

I'm overwhelmed with guilt.
I want to lay in bed all day and cry.
I feel like rolling over and dying.

Fuck this.

I don't know what to do.

depression

sigh

monkytrainr Mar 01, 2006 22:18

I'm tired of being a drunk.
I just want to be an alcoholic.
(Alcoholics go to meetings. Drunks just drink).

I went to a meeting tonight and picked up a new 24-hour chip. I cried.

There are a very limited number of people who aren't enraged with me. I don't know how to fix it, besides staying sober. So I'll do that.

aa