I immedietly received a smack from him. "Just go to sleep" He pout and turned his back violent min LOL!! XD
a little bit of grammar problems, don't worry ^^ read more fics and you'll improve ^^ you should make it longer, by longer, i means write everything in detail, and not just rush it like that...
i'm so sorry if my comment sounds harsh or hurts to you because i really don't mean to be harsh... moreover is your first fic > < but then criticize make good fic ^^
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"Just go to sleep" He pout and turned his back
violent min LOL!! XD
a little bit of grammar problems, don't worry ^^ read more fics and you'll improve ^^
you should make it longer, by longer, i means write everything in detail, and not just rush it like that...
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I'm really sorry for my lateness
I can't online the last few days because of my network TT__TT~
I am highly appreciate your straight comment =x~
I'll try my best to improve that probs ^^~
Btw, I love you avatar =x~
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i'm so sorry if my comment sounds harsh or hurts to you because i really don't mean to be harsh...
moreover is your first fic > <
but then criticize make good fic ^^
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