a msg to a friends about BD
a friend msg me and asked about wut i thought about Breaking Dawn
FOR THE LULZ!!!
a spoofy summary.
hello i`m bella swan; a shy, awkward, stubborn, plain, teen age girl.
but now i get married and go on a honeymoon on Esme Isle, an island Carlisle bought and named after my motherinlaw that my Eddiepoo takes me to so we can TRY to have sex.
eddie has decided to go on ahead and take a dive in the ocean, i[shy/awkward one] soon after join him by dropping my towel at the edge of the beach and storm in nakely to try and seduce him. Success!
we, also have sex a second time.
ate some bad chicken and now i`m progo.
JAKE! WHERE THE FUCK DID U COME FROM!!*bella has been hip bumped by jake causing her to go flying*
JAKE: "TIME FOR MY POV BITCHZZZZZ!!!"
must save bella!!
must break free of Sam's command!!
*ALPHA MALE!!*/seth+leah
god damn it bella is makeing me feel all warmandfuzzy/heartbroken with her shitsandgiggles and smilesandsunshine...but she looks like shit.
she named it Renesme!? WTF??
ohnoes! devil spawn is killing bells from the inside out.
*lightbulb* make her drink blood!!
s`all good s`all good but then bella dies.
MUST KILL DEVIL SPAWN!!!!
*IMPRINT!* from now on this child will be known as NESSIE!!!
BELLS: "NEW AND IMPROVED!! BAK TO MY POV BITCHZZZZZ!!!"
you named my kid after the lochness monster!?! WTF!
first hunt rips up my skanky blue dress and makes eddiepoo horny.
*lots of sex*
IMPENDING VOLTURI DOOM IS NOW UPON US!!
the most anticlimatic thing ever happens...
nothing =.=
END
the forth book?
an OutOfCharacter/AlternativeUniverse fanfic.
some parts were ok and fun to read.
i`m just glad it gave me closure.
FOR THE LULZ!!!
a spoofy summary.
hello i`m bella swan; a shy, awkward, stubborn, plain, teen age girl.
but now i get married and go on a honeymoon on Esme Isle, an island Carlisle bought and named after my motherinlaw that my Eddiepoo takes me to so we can TRY to have sex.
eddie has decided to go on ahead and take a dive in the ocean, i[shy/awkward one] soon after join him by dropping my towel at the edge of the beach and storm in nakely to try and seduce him. Success!
we, also have sex a second time.
ate some bad chicken and now i`m progo.
JAKE! WHERE THE FUCK DID U COME FROM!!*bella has been hip bumped by jake causing her to go flying*
JAKE: "TIME FOR MY POV BITCHZZZZZ!!!"
must save bella!!
must break free of Sam's command!!
*ALPHA MALE!!*/seth+leah
god damn it bella is makeing me feel all warmandfuzzy/heartbroken with her shitsandgiggles and smilesandsunshine...but she looks like shit.
she named it Renesme!? WTF??
ohnoes! devil spawn is killing bells from the inside out.
*lightbulb* make her drink blood!!
s`all good s`all good but then bella dies.
MUST KILL DEVIL SPAWN!!!!
*IMPRINT!* from now on this child will be known as NESSIE!!!
BELLS: "NEW AND IMPROVED!! BAK TO MY POV BITCHZZZZZ!!!"
you named my kid after the lochness monster!?! WTF!
first hunt rips up my skanky blue dress and makes eddiepoo horny.
*lots of sex*
IMPENDING VOLTURI DOOM IS NOW UPON US!!
the most anticlimatic thing ever happens...
nothing =.=
END
the forth book?
an OutOfCharacter/AlternativeUniverse fanfic.
some parts were ok and fun to read.
i`m just glad it gave me closure.