(no subject)
I miss my boyfriend and I feel needy when I miss my boyfriend. We hung out last night, but only for like 2 hours and then we both fell alseep. I called him and he said that he was suppose to hang out with Kevin, but Kevin hadn't called back yet. I got the feeling he didn't want to see me. I guess it isn't that huge of a deal except i have plans tomorrow and I have to work at 3 on Thursday and get my prom dress fitted. I also have plans thursday night. I guess if all else fails, I'll see him Friday at his game. I fell like such a stupid girl, and I hate that. I hate it more than anything. I fell like crying for no particular reason. Maybe because Chelly gets to see her boyfriend tonight and I don't, but she hasn't seen him since late Friday night. I guess I can't really complain. I got time with mine on Saturday, but I was rushed out because "his dad was stressed out". The loud,obnoxious boys could be over there Sunday. Something tells me Bruce would never ask to me leave. I was just sitting quietly on the couch too. Ugh whatever. I feel really really lame right now. I can't concentrate and I don't want to be here, but I have no where better to go.
I guess I just don't know what to do with myself. Maybe I should go read maybe not.
Today we had dance and two girls didn't show up. mander was working because she didn't ask for the time off and who the hell knows where Sarah was. It was such a fucking waste of my time. It just seems to be a waste of my time this year. Maybe I wont dance next year. All it causes me a headache and maybe I just don't feel like dealing with that. The only reason she keeps me around is so I can do all her stupid things she doesn't want to do. It'd be different if I got paid, but I haven't and I never will. Part of me feels bad, but part of me doesn't. Don't even come to my dance rectial because it's going to be really lame.
I wish it was still light out so I could go for a run, but running in the dark is lame and I want company. I have been myself for 3/4 of the day and frankly I find that a little boring. It's not that I don't like alone time. I just don't like a whole lot of it. I like being busy because it's easier than making plans with people. God I'm such a lazy bastard. Eh what're you goin to do? I'd say I could sleep, but I'm not tired.
Maybe I'll clean or do something productive with myself.
I need a bullet in the head
xoxo,
Me