[SDF] [Moon Sergeant] [Forty-nine Seconds]

[moonsergeant]

Title: Forty-nine Seconds
Summary: Someone finally figured it out...how her blank eyes worked.
Rating: T (for profanity)
Notes: A Pre-TYL fic for Cleis.
Disclaimer: I own all the characters mentioned except Sarah Marquez, who belongs to mizumi88.
Warning: A very long fic. Originally 19 pages when opened in MS Word, Tahoma size 10.

The fic is too

Comments

[neko11lover]

Wow, this is the first time I've read it (I'm sorry o_o It got lost in my download folder orz) and... ARUN /cry You make really nice OCs and Cleis developed quite consistently. My favorite part would be when he went to hear her play, I loved your description in that part.

Please write more! o/

[moonsergeant]

Thank you. You say I make "really nice OCs," but actually, I think a few more OCs (to make) and you'll find a pattern (or maybe you'll find they're almost all the same). I'm trying to get diverse. ^^

My favorite part would probably be when they're fighting. /lolshare Thanks again!

HOMYGAD ARUN BROKE MY HEART

[akemi_chan05]

I think I would be the first one to comment since I was the first one to read.

HEEHEEHEE. YOU REPLACED NICHOLAS SPARKS IN MY HEART. (Oh, wait. Maybe you're the one destined in that place---*shot*)

No seriously. The way the 49-second relationship was made was very...unique. And the way their - Cleis and Arun's - relationship was built up...ahhh~ *flails* Though yeah, if it was taken piece by piece through a multi-chaptered fic, I think it would be lovelier, but for me, this is more than enough.

AND ARUN OH GOD. HE'S SO ADORBS. :) SO ADORBS THAT I'M SPEECHLESS. REALLY.

Keep it up Momo! o/ I would love to see more of your works soon. :)

*thumbs up* Good job!

~Kemi

PS.I CRIED BTW. D:

Re: HOMYGAD ARUN BROKE MY HEART

[neko11lover]

The way the 49-second relationship was made was very...unique. And the way their - Cleis and Arun's - relationship was built up...ahhh~ *flails* <-- seconding

Re: HOMYGAD ARUN BROKE MY HEART

[moonsergeant]

Oh my. Thank you very much. I don't think it's appropriate to compare me with Nicholas Sparks though. I think you're overestimating me. XD (And I don't think I can do any more than this lol)

About your suggestion of a piece-by-piece chaptered fic: The last time I did that, I got carried away. It's a 435-page thing now. I'm serious. And that was high school. XDD And yeah, since I don't think a lot of people are interested with an OC, so I tried to keep it at this. Thank you for the suggestion though!

Ehehe. Arun. Thank you!

Review, haha~

[mizumi888]

I must say, this was quite the read. I have to tip my hat off to you. You really are quite the writer. No wonder it's so fun doing literary role-play with you.

I particularly liked how you wrote this in separated points of view, in first person. I personally rarely write in first person as I find it unusual and slightly awkward while writing it. Aside from that, I rarely find fics in first person POV that are written as well as yours :)

I found your characters very interesting. And the development of the story was just wonderful, seriously. On the technical side of things, I only saw very few errors! Great work on that for someone who hasn't written anything seriously in a long time :D

So this was what you were talking about in the RP. Nice, now I get it better. Apparently, our characters are birds of the same feather in more ways than one XD

...I really shouldn't be listening to Avenue Q musical songs when reading and reviewing. It's not conductive to making my brain work so I apologize if this is too short or blah. The musical's

Re: Review, haha~

[moonsergeant]

Thanks Milky! I actually find it easier to write First-person POV things. And I enjoy (literary?!) role-playing with you too!

Re: Review, haha~

[mizumi888]

Oh, I see. I suppose it depends on who's writing, hm? Well, I still think it's well-written, nonetheless, so I commend you on it. Keep it up! :)

[moonsergeant]

Of course it's okay! I'm kinda worried about your printer though. This thing is quite long. But thank you for showing interest in it! *A*

[trice_bea10]

Waaah~ I read this one, too! My sister was very pushy saying that I had to read this even if it was 3 o'clock in the morning :)) But I'm VERY glad that I did. It was very...lovely~ I love how the title was explained in the story. The idea was very wonderful and...and...you're just amazing~~

Write more ;)

[moonsergeant]

Thanks Bea! Thank youuu! I hope err...you've had enough sleep. XD