Honey Love, Bitter Misery l Adam/Blake l Chapter Two: Impossible
Note: I should have mentioned this in the last chapter; I’ll probably go back and change it but the last chapter takes place after the end of the first live show. At the moment we are backtracking a bit to the beginning of the battle rounds (May 10th) so we can find where the Adam/Blakesness came from, because you know they needed a little push. Just a small one ;p
Quote: There are so many things she wanted to say to him but never had. Like: You have the most amazing eyes. Please give me that hat you always wear. I think our souls are meant to be together. What kind of breath freshener is that?-Unknown
Chapter Two: Impossible
Five Weeks Prior
The sun was already coming down from its highest point in the sky to start it’s descent into the darker and cooler part of the twenty four hours as he walked into studio. Blinking a few times to adjust to the dark lighting behind his shades, he walked towards the back rooms where he hoped his vitamin water was waiting.
Not that he wanted to avoid the hopefuls or the stage hands, but considering that the he hadn’t slept well the night before wasn’t helping his issues with people. Don’t get him wrong, he liked people in general. But when he was irritable, from stress or lack of sleep, he snapped at people way more than he needed too.
Hence the reason why he was trying to get to his Fruit Punch water thing at the moment while avoiding all human contact that he could, he hoped it would help his patience levels.
Managing to bypass a few of the contestants that were warming up with a faint smile and a few words, he was almost there when he heard the accent that made his smile bit wider.
“Why in god’s name are you wearing sunglasses inside?” Turning to look up, he found himself gazing into the bluest eyes he knew of.
The two eyes were so interesting that he could look at them all the time. They were always changing; you never knew what they’d look like. Sometimes they were the light blue like the sky where you would lie on your back and look at the clouds. Other times were like the dark blue that the ocean was at a sunrise. The only consistent thing in the two orbs was that they twinkled like the stars at midnight. The sight of them instantly improved his mood, his irritation washing away; but he couldn’t let Blake know that.
“Because, unlike you, I know a bit about fashion and this is fashionable” He replied obnoxiously with a bit of sarcasm that he knew Blake would pick up on easily as he pulled the dark glasses down just enough to look at the taller man.
The grin that was on his face transferred to the country star. “Well you got me there”
Then there was the laugh that made his insides twist with a horde of fluttery butterflies. It was deep, loud, and purely from the soul; it was the most wonderful noise that had ever reached his ears. If he could get away with it, without anybody especially the big man himself finding out, he would have the hearty southern chuckle as his ringtone. But it wouldn’t happen; Blake might just wonder why he would have the recording end of a phone in his face.
He couldn’t help but laugh along with the other man.
Even though it would never be, these kinds of moments helped him never to give up hope. Blake was to be married in four days, he didn’t have a chance. He would attend the wedding on the big man’s request; it would kill him to disappoint Blake, but the entire time he would probably be a nervous wreck trying to decide whether he was going to stand up. It would have to be at the perfect time, right before the two said I do, to make the biggest splash. It would be simple, two words that he wished he would have the heart to say ‘I object’.
But that would be awkward and ended with cutting off all contact with big country. That was not something he just couldn’t deal with, even though he had only known the guy for a few weeks. He thanked god for the show or he would have never met the guy.
As Samuel Butler had said, his words becoming the center piece for love never to be or for breakups, ‘It is better to love and lost than never to love at all’. This was like his mantra since the show would have to come to an end, as the time that Blake was available ticked down. He would lose the big man soon, but the fact was ignored as he tried to not think about the inevitable.
It was never to be, but as he looked into the blue eyes of the one he wished could be the honey suckle for; he would never give up hope.
He pointed to the giant black cowboy hat atop the other man’s head while laughing “I mean look, at that thing!”
“Hey now, don’t knock the hat when you’re convincing everyone that you’re hungover with those shades” Blake shot back with a faint smirk while chuckling.
“I am not…” He started to protest when the host of the show passed them, probably on the way to makeup. Noticing the two of them, Carson Daly’s gaze focused in on him.
What the hell was that about?
Trying not to squirm under the man’s gaze, he looked over to the man who he called big country. It seemed that his knight in shining armor was about to say something when the host finally spoke.
“Late night Adam?” From the corner of his shaded vision he saw Blake cover his mouth to try and not burst out in hysterical laughing. The sight of the big man bent in half clutching his stomach was one he wished he had a camera for.
“No” He hissed back, his irritation levels back at their high points mostly due to the fact that there was no telling the big man that he was wrong now. He had been proven wrong, which pissed him off to no end.
That response caused a weird look from Carson, who ignorantly shrugged it off before continuing on his way.
He twirled to face Blake after glaring at the host’s back for five seconds, about to say something to prove that he was not telling people he was hung over by wearing sunglasses when he was stopped short.
A hand came down on his shoulder; it felt like a fucking bear paw, as Blake tried to steady himself. He tried not to blush when he realized that the big man’s bowed head was way closer than it needed to be to his. Even though he wanted it to be right in front of him, a kiss would probably fry his mind though, it would blow his ‘bro’ cover that he had with the man.
Maybe now would be the time to just gently cup the chin of the bigger man, meeting eyes with Blake right before testing out his theory that Blake tasted like honey and whiskey. Now could be his last chance, the wedding was only a few days away…
“Save the bromance for the show boys!”
The hand disappeared, leaving a hint of the fiery heat that he wished for all over his body, as they both turned to see the blonde devil of music smiling at them.
He was tempted to growl, instead he glared. She smiled wickedly back.
Despite the fact that she thought it was just something to piss both of them off with, she was dead on with the truth and he could not have Blake finding out. It would be easier to keep it under wraps if Christina didn’t bring it up every five seconds! Maybe he could just shrug it off, flipping the bird at the woman probably wasn’t the best idea since it would put her on the idea that her harmless theory was true.
“We don’t want to”
WHAT?!?
His neck muscles might hurt later from where his head snapped up faster than a photo flash, but he didn’t fucking care as he looked to Blake. The man was currently looking at their arch nemesis, off and on the show, with a grin.
The woman was probably sporting the same shocked ‘did he really just say that?’ expression that he was, but it didn’t matter as Blake turned to him and gave him a warm wink before a strong arm wrapped around his waist.
Trying to ignore the fact that his lower half was currently feeling very, VERY, happy right now with the embrace as the country boy pulled him closer, he decided to humor Blake with the act that he really wish was for real.
“You’re just jealous” He smirked, trying not to let his face blush up, leaning his head against his love’s shoulder. Although he wanted to nuzzle into the man’s shoulder, he knew that would be taking too far; so he didn’t.
“I- I…”
“Wow, she’s actually speechless” He muttered under his breath as the only woman coach tried to come up with something to say.
The body against his rumbled as Blake let out a few low chuckles, he couldn’t help but smile.
“Now how about leave the two of us alone?” The husky voice of the bigger man was heard, sending small vibrations into his skin.
Putting on his best replica of a southern accent he shooed in her direction “You heard big country, git”
Out of the corner of his eye he saw the taller man bite his lip in an attempt not to laugh, she decided to try and speak “Whatever, just don’t let Miranda know about you and Addy”
His eyes went wide before they narrowed in anger.
She just had to do it; she just had to fucking bring that up!
He knew that they were teasing to each other but did she really have to do that? Thank god that the bitch didn’t meet his gaze, she might have just been six feet under had she. They were having a good moment, one where he was closer to Blake than he usually was, and she had to ruin it!
“Don’t worry, she won’t; ain’t that right Adam?” The voice of the one he was glued to at the moment brought him from his short fuse moment to look into those two blue eyes. The two lips that haunted his dreams smiled faintly and his body didn’t even give him a choice as he mirrored it.
“I won’t tell, will you Chrissy?” Now it was her turn to glare, she hated that nickname; luckily for her he hadn’t used it on air…yet.
A sound that for some reason reminded him of the one that came from Marge Simpson’s throat was heard before the blond version of the jersey devil turned and walked back towards her dressing room.
Then, to his disappointment, the arm relinquished itself to its original place by its owner’s side. A small shiver ran up his spine as the heat that was at the base of it dissipated in a matter of moments.
“Well I think we shut her up, what do you think Mr. Hangover?” Had he not been so happy from the touch session, he would have possibly glared; instead he turned to the man.
“I think that we should switch accessories”
Where had that come from? Oh well, no going back now. He was generally random in his actions, so this shouldn’t really surprise himself that he was doing this.
“Why?” Blake questioned as a hand went protectively towards his hat. There were three possessions you did not fuck with in Blake’s life; his guitar, his whiskey, and his hat. Messing with any of the three would mean that you would have a giant very angry grizzly bear…err country man cursing your name.
“The fans will love it and I won’t be seen as a half drunk” It was true, the fans would scream at their ‘bromantic exchange’ of personal items. It would probably also start more rumors that they were sleeping together, he wished, but it’d be worth it.
“Then they’ll think that I’m drunk” The bigger man replied, his fingers tracing the rim of his hat idly. He wished that Blake would do that to him; idly run his fingers up his arm…he really needed to focus.
“You’re a country star dumbass” He drawled, obviously it would be more acceptable for the big man to be toasted than his ‘city boy’ self as Blake called him.
“True, true” There was that smile again, that giant country ‘if you don’t like it you can kiss my ass’ grin.
“So we switch?” He posed the question while looking at the item which might just be his. If the exchange did happen, he might just ‘lose’ it. Which of course Blake might just kill him for but at least he could know that he would have a piece of the big guy once the show was over and they didn’t see each other on a daily basis. Then he could just smell the earthy smell that was Blake whenever he wanted too.
That was it; he decided firmly in his mind, he had to have that hat.
And he would, if it was the last thing he did.
Being impatient as a hat, no the hat, Blake’s hat, mocked him; he waited a moment before going for the hat. Considering that Blake was taller than him, he had to stretch on his toes before doing a little hop to try and reach it. But before he could get it, a giant hand wrapped around his arm, he looked at Blake with an innocent look.
“Please don’t eat me” His voice came out in a feeble tone, although he knew the bigger man would never do such a thing. The comment was just for them both to get a kick out of.
Blake chuckled before releasing his arm; then the star spoke “How about we leave the glasses to Cee Lo and forget the hat?”
Damn, he really wanted the hat though
“Fine” He pouted before walking towards his dressing room. Even though he didn’t want to leave Blake, it would be best if he wasn’t blushed when the show started. It was also a good thing that he wasn’t caught in a ‘bromantic’ position by the group of rising stars that had just come into the space.
He was halfway down the hallway, his hand on the doorknob, when he heard something.
“See you at the show Addy!”
He felt his face heat up as it flushed.
Oh hell no…
He didn’t, he didn’t just do that.
Twisting slowly around, while ignoring the snickers and goofy looks of the ones that would be singing their hearts out tonight, he met the gaze of where the damned sentence had originated.
The country boy’s whole body mirrored the taunt, he couldn’t help but start from the bottom and work his way up the toned person who was mocking him. The lips that had spoken it were proudly smirking, the eyebrows above them were raised in a ‘Whatcha gonna do about it?’ pose.
Damn, he was so sexy when he was being a jackass.
Glaring into the two blue eyes, he felt his jaw tense. Damn Christina for coming up with it and damn the big man for using it! His middle fingers were twitching from where he was tempted to flash a double barrel bird at the man he was sure that he loved.
But then again…an evil idea came to mind.
His eyelashes fluttered at his intended target as his head cocked just a little to the side. Putting his hands on his hips he put on a shy smile and his octaves prepared to go a bit higher than normal.
“Okay Bee-Bee, see you then!” With that, he blew a kiss and winked before ducking inside his dressing room.
From the whistles, giggles, and the many uses of “Damn!” echoing past the door into his ear, Blake hadn’t know what hit him and his plan had gone off without a hitch. Doing a full on fist pump in celebrating his victoriously awesome reply, he then searched for his drink. Twisting off the cap, he drank half the thing through smiling lips.
Setting the bottle down before settling into his very soft chair, he looked into the mirror.
Sliding off the sunglasses, that had sometimes stayed on his face, he laid them on the table before studying the damage that Blake and his flirting (whether it was on purpose or not) had done.
It wasn’t too bad considering what could have happened; he let out a sigh of relief.
His secret, that he was gay and had a crush on a straight to be married man, was still safe; as was the news that he and Anna had called it quits for different reasons; hers being that she was looking at other and his being that he had been doing the same.
He wished it wasn’t a secret, he wished he could know if those lips were soft, or how if felt to have those two strong arms holding him against their owner.
He learned a long time ago that wishes didn’t come true, the rarely did…
Taking a deep breath, he pressed the cold bottle to his face to get rid of the blush; soon he would be two seats away from his own Honey Bee, he had to prepare.
…at least he could dream.
Just breath, she told herself, as she watched the battle between her teammates.
Just the thought that she would have to go up against someone else made her knees shake. From what she had seen online, people loved her voice but thought that she needed to be louder. How was she going to be at the level with another?
I guess I’ll just cross that bridge when we come to it, she thought, before turning back to the screen to watch Patrick and Tyler duke it out. Her fingers had been crossed for the longest time that the first would win; he was the reason that she was at the show to support him. Even though they had only met each other a few days ago, they were already good friends. He accepted that she was shy and unsure about herself, but despite that they had a very good relationship.
“Thank god that’s over” She smiled faintly at the taller boy as he came through the doorway; it was obvious he had won by the wide smile on his face.
“You did great” The compliment made his grin at her before she gave him a celebratory hug. She had been shy about contact, but he reminded her so much of her big brother that they had become like siblings (he had even mentioned that she reminded him of his sister) so she had no problem with hugs.
“You’ll do the same when it’s your turn” He replied, confidence and pride going into the sentence. She turned her head shyly as the other people in the room smirk before looking back to the screen for the next battle.
“I’ll definitely try” The sentence came out in a small voice, but Patrick was used to listening closely, so of course he heard it.
“Really? I thought you were going to do nothing” He rolled his eyes, she snickered softly
“Well to get to the live show I have to” Move a strand of hair out of her face, she stated the fact that the two of them had made a pact to make it to the live show together. After that they knew it would be every singer for themselves, but until then it was good to have a goal and stick together.
“You’re not going to have a problem, it’ll be smooth sailing when you perform” He was so confident in her, she wished that she could have that confidence for herself.
About to say something, she was cut off by someone entering the room.
Average height with blond hair and brown eyes, that’s all she saw as he came closer. The person she was talking to moved a bit in front of her, protecting her just like everyone else did, while eying the newcomer for any sign of a threat. Even though it was a supposedly secure set, it was possible for a ‘bad guy’ to get through; Patrick just wasn’t taking the chance.
Taking one look around the room, she saw the older performers who had also come to support their team or to scope out the competition tense as if they were going to come to her aid if she needed it.
Even though it was human nature to help others, she knew it was because of her why they all jumped up in preparation for a showdown.
You couldn’t real blame them; she wasn’t exactly the toughest person out the crowd.
She was Team Blake’s ‘little Xenia’; the soft spoken, innocent, sweet as sugar personal favorite. Despite the fact that almost everyone was taller than her, everyone loved her and no one wanted to see her get hurt.
Hence the fact why her teammate, a stranger who had become like a brother to her in only a few days, was defending her. And why people she hadn’t even said two words to were ready to provide backup.
“Whatcha need partner?” Slipping into the country tone that she usually heard from her coach, then again Patrick was a mini Blake; her taller companion addressed the man.
“Could you tell me where Adam Levine’s dressing room is? I was going to wait for him to get an autograph for my daughter” His voice was average, a little soft, but there was just something about him that made chills run up her spine.
Looking to the man’s face for a moment, she met his eyes as he smiled at her. Fear washed over her as her body screamed to back away slowly and run away!
She moved behind her human shield a bit more, an action that her friend did not miss from the corner of his eye before responding “Right down the hall, his name’s on the door”
“Thanks” With that the man walked off into the shadows and Patrick turned to face her.
“What’s wrong?” He must have seen the fear in her eyes; why else would he be asking? That’s when she found that he was staring at her hands, they were shaking.
Looking up from floor into his blue green eyes, she took a breath to steady herself before replying. “I have a bad feeling”
“About the battle?” Seems his head wasn’t out of the game yet.
“No, that guy” He raised an eyebrow at her, looked over his shoulder like he would be able to see the man that was long gone, before looking back.
“Why? He seemed fine to me” Attempting to shrug, she laced her fingers together to try and stop them from shaking.
“I don’t know, but I do not like him at all” His eyes narrowed a bit as his body language radiated protectiveness more than before.
“Don’t worry honey, he won’t get anywhere near ya” The bald woman, her name was something that seemed like the opposite of her personality, that had come to see the two powerhouses of her team perform. What was her name again? It didn’t matter as the woman gave her a smile that gave her reassurance that the statement was the truth.
“She’s right you know, nothing’s going to get Team Blake’s secret weapon” Two hands wrapped around the fist hers were making, their shivering almost gone.
Maybe she was just being paranoid, but then why was the feeling that something bad was going to happen still flowing through her veins?
It didn’t feel right at all…
“I know” She said in a whisper, although her eyes were on where the man had exited the room.
…if only she knew what was wrong.
“AND WE’RE OFF, THAT’S A WRAP FOLKS!”
Relaxing in the leather chair for a moment, he watched the live audience file out in a chaotic horde of people. The show had been a productive one in his mind, sure he had cut off a person, but to win he had to have the best. To beat Christina he had to have the best, there was no way he was going to lost to her. Doing a little weeding was needed; it had to be done, although no one said it was easy.
Nothing was ever easy, just like looking down at the beautiful man who was currently on his phone. One look made him happy and miserable at the same time, yet he couldn’t look away. The big man was probably tweeting, but just the sight of him doing anything was intoxicating.
What kind of withdrawal would he go through when this was all over and the fix he needed wasn’t in sight? The question haunted him; he didn’t want to think about it. Perhaps he would cry at the wedding, for all the wrong reasons as that golden ring was slid up one of the fingers he wanted to feel on his skin.
Would he shiver in the middle of the night because there wasn’t a pair of strong arms around him? Would he pounce on random people just because they were tall and were wearing a cowboy hat? None of it mattered, it was inevitable after all. Whatever happened would happen; there wasn’t anything he could do to stop it.
But god damn it; he wished he could!
The idea that he would lose Blake just pissed him off, his anger mostly towards himself for being too much of a pussy to do anything about it!
With those thoughts going through his head, he let out his anger in the two ways he knew would help him calm down. It had worked in the past; it would work now so he wouldn’t snap at someone.
Cue him violently beating the crap out of the button in front of him with his now curled fist, over and over. In the back of his mind he wondered what the fuck the thing was made out of, he was surprised that it hadn’t broken already with the abuse he was dishing out. But it didn’t really matter; he was getting his anger out as a steady stream of loud curses came from his mouth.
“Damnit, fuck, fucking shit, god fucking damn it, fuck, fucking fuck, FUCK!”
Turns out that his plan for getting rid of frustrations was a bad idea, a very bad idea, as everyone in the general vicinity (which happened to be everyone in the studio, the damn place echoed) turned to look at him, which was fucking great. It must be big news when a music star looks frustrated, especially for no reason. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his fellow coaches casting concerned looks his direction, especially Blake.
Normally he would have loved the attention, but now it was just another nail in the coffin. Cee Lo would let him off since he didn’t know him that well, Christina would take some work for her to get off his back, but Blake would hound him until he gave up and fucking told him. And that would be really, really, REALLY bad.
“Anything wrong man?”
What the hell was he going to say? Since he had no idea, he just looked at the slightly abused piece of plastic called his button.
“Earth to Adam!”
Perhaps they would just forget about him if he didn’t answer. Normally he didn’t ignore people, but there were exceptions for everything.
“Hello, anybody home?”
And those exceptions about his attitude and behavior came in to play to protect his secret, they rarely failed him. Not that they always worked, he was in deep shit.
How the hell was he going to get out of this one?
“Adam”
He had been in worse, but this was the first time that he had been caught having a mental breakdown. He was screwed, so screwed…
“Adam!”
They were going to find out and he would have to resort to flying to Madagascar or some other fucking small island where he could limit how much humiliation he would face. He’d never be able to see Blake again; the man would be disgusted by him.
God, I know I haven’t been the purest person, he prayed silently. Alright, I know I’m on the bottom of that list, but please get me out of this!
Screwed, he was so screwed…
He would live out the rest of his life alone, stripped of his fame, humiliated, without his band, without his life, and without…
“ADAM!"
The booming voice made him jump just a bit as he snapped his messy thoughts to look up into two blue eyes.
…Blake.
The country star was now in front of him, when the hell had he moved? The other two judges were not that far behind, although he found it interesting that they had let Blake take point. The taller man relaxed a little, a little being the key words, seeing that he had finally been acknowledged.
“What?” Ah fuck, his voice had come out to bitch slap the unfortunate person the response had been directed at. Fucking figures that it was Blake that had to deal with his grumpiness. Just another reason not to fucking mess with him when he was pissed at someone, something, or himself.
“You okay? You seem a little high strung” The southern accent washed over him, the fears and frustrations of what the future help tucked away with each word. But they would be back soon enough to cause another breakdown.
“Yeah, yeah…” No, actually he was not alright, but at least the mumbled words were giving him some kind of defense so that the words that came out of his mouth were something along the lines of ‘I love you’.
“Uh-huh….right” The only female in their group of four raised an eyebrow, they all did. They didn’t believe his bullshit for a moment.
Blake then looked over his shoulder to the woman, who had already met eyes with their black fellow, which only meant on thing. They were scheming and he had to fucking get out of here!
He could deal with him stress somewhere else, but if they pinned him here then something bad would happen.
Readying his leg muscles, he prepared to stand and run the fuck away.
Blake seemed oblivious to his movement, which was good, but instead was focused on giving him the most compassionate and caring look he had ever seen…he couldn’t look him in the eyes or he might just melt! ‘Papa Bear’ (as they all teased him) then decided to ask a question about his tantrum, he was actually surprised it hadn’t been asked earlier.
“What was that then?”
Oh that? It was nothing, I was just losing my mind because you’re getting married and I can’t tell you that I want to kiss you. That I want to have your country skin next to mine all day, that everything else could go fuck itself because I don’t care. I don’t care about anything except that I want you to stop everything, the wedding, the show, everything, and fucking kiss me. But like that’s ever going to happen…
“What was that?” There must have been fear in his eyes as they went to the size of extra large dinner plates as Blake looked at him with an eyebrow raised.
HE HAD FUCKING SAID THAT ALOUD?!?!?!
He was so fucked.
He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, seeking a way out.
“I said, I’m fine” Trying to put on a smile and not show that his heart was beating faster than a rock guitar solo, he stood to start walking away.
“Adam” An arm blocked his path; he looked at its owner who with one word was questioning his mental sanity. The word was low; telling him that anything he needed was available, trust seeped through the word.
Not that that made any difference, he wouldn’t…no, he couldn’t tell.
“I’m fine” Saying so forcefully while summoning his best glare, he moved past the fleshy obstacle
Don’t look back, don’t look back, he chanted in his mind. Looking back would only screw the situation even more, even though he wanted to have a hug from Blake. It would make everything go away as those arms surrounded him, but it wasn’t possible.
Impossible, that’s what his life was at the moment.
Ignoring the stares of curiosity and concern he was getting from the judges he was leaving behind and the cast that had been watching from the sidelines, he walked into the shadows of backstage.
There were more stares, more whispers; stupid echoing stage, taking a deep breath he continued to his dressing room. There, he paused to look at the door.
Seems that someone had been busy; because the a few changes had been made to the sign that was taped to his door.
ADAM LEVINE’S
Addy’s dressing room
DO NOT ENTER!
(Unless your name is Bee-Bee; if it is then come on it!)
He wondered if it had been Christina, nah…it had probably been one of the stagehands. He’d leave it up for now, maybe he’d even smile at it tomorrow.
But for now it was just a reminder of the mess that was his impossible life.
Opening the door just enough, he slipped through the crack before closing it behind him. Flipping the switch out of habit, he walked over to the mirror. Sitting down in the chair before the reflecting glass, he looked at the sunglasses he had set on the desk.
After looking at them for what seemed like the longest time, he put them on. In the mirror, all you could see was him. Well the cover up anyway, the illusion that he had set to deceive everyone. The barriers that covered up his confusion, despair, everything about the chaos called his life. With the shades, he was a smooth talking pretty boy that had nothing wrong with his life.
No secrets that he desperately wanted to share.
No crush on his fellow coach.
Nothing, it all vanished with the shades.
Everything was hidden with them…
With one fluid movement, the mirror shattered as the metal frames collided with the glass. As the sound of the glass falling to break on the white plastic counter reached his ears, he nodded sadly to his own reflection in what part of the mirror refused to fall.
It was just one small piece, just enough to show half his face. Nothing more; nothing less. Just the sliver had a glimpse into what stayed behind the shades; how his soul had become tattered in the few weeks he had been with the show.
He didn’t want to hide, he want everything to be known.
Too bad the world didn’t fucking work like that.
Maybe it was for the best, no reason to ruin Blake’s life. That’s what would happen if his secrets came out, if they were unleashed to the world. Not everyone would be accepting of his wishes, his choices from the past.
And although he wanted to scream it all to the heavens…
“Having a bad day are we?”
…some were better left buried in hell, where they belonged.
No, he knew that voice from his nightmares, the ones where he screamed for Blake. He felt his body shiver as he turned around to face the one that he hoped and prayed that he would never see again. His version of the boogie man came from the shadows, panic started to rise up. Pain burned him as he avoided eye contact.
A hand grabbed his chin; he moved to jerk away but stopped when he saw it.
No, not again.
Not fucking again.
Fighting back, he managed to get free to dash for the door. Someone would help him; get this monster away from him. An image, one of his favorite country singer coming to his aid, filled his mind. With it came more motivation, even though he was disoriented, to get to the door.
Something covered his nose; dizziness filled him as he fell into the arms he wanted to be no where near. Trying to get rid of the black spots filling his vision, damn things, he met eyes with the person who was cradling him.
The person smiled, he feebly tried to get away. Hell he even tried to crawl away, but it was like all his energy was being sucked away.
The shadows of the room became even darker as he felt his eyelids drop.
“It’ll all be over soon” A hand smoothed his hair; he flinched away as much as he could.
NO, his mind roared, he wouldn’t let this happen again!
Not again…
And right before the darkness of unconsciousness filled his mind, he felt one word on his lips. It came out soft, a whisper in the dark cold room.
No one would ever hear it, not even the bastard preparing to do his worst.
But none of it mattered; perhaps it would give him strength for the pain.
“Blake…”
I thank you for reading and commenting!
Oh nose, Adam’s in trouble!
Who’s the man?
Will Blake come to the rescue?
Will Blake go grizzly bear on the bastard?
FIND OUT NEXT CHAPTER!