fic - Fraser/RayK smut
Okay, this is Due South, but it may appeal to non-DSers looking for a little smut this afternoon. ldthomps asked for Fraser/RayK, on the park bench in my mood icon (see below), covertly.
This was supposed to be a little ficlet, maybe 300 words. It's 1,326 words. It has not been beta'd. It could probably be continued, but not at the moment. I can't believe I wrote this much. And if I wasn't sure before, I am now. I am so completely channeling Ray Kowalski today. Oh to be Ray. *sigh*
Title: I Couldn't Help Myself (tentative title)
Pairing: Fraser/RayK
Fandom: Due South
Rating: light NC-17
Ray sat alone on the park bench staring out at Lake Michigan. He’d come here a lot lately to just sit and stare at the water and think. Think about Fraser and what almost happened, but didn’t and why it couldn’t, but how he wished it could. Oh how he wished it could.
They were on a stakeout. Sitting in his car. Fraser telling another one of his weird Inuit stories that Ray never quite figured out the relevance of and then he’d said something about the things men do when alone in the middle of nowhere. Ray had been staring out his side window, watching the building, half listening, half working the case in his head. But at Fraser’s words, he’d turned his head sharply to find Fraser staring straight ahead. His face was calm, but his hands gave him a way. He was fidgeting, spinning his Stetson between those fingers. Those long, beautiful fingers. Ray’d never really noticed Fraser’s hands before that night and now he couldn’t get them out of his head.
So here he sat in the middle of the afternoon on bench by the lake. And while the sky was overcast, it was still light and he was clearly in the open. Anyone could see him. He shouldn’t be touching himself here, someone would see.
But he couldn’t help himself. He thought of Fraser constantly, but even more so when he was alone. In his mind his hands were Fraser’s and he couldn’t stop them. He pressed the heel of his hand to his crotch and groaned. His eyes darted in all directions, looking for passersby. Could anyone see him? He yet to opened his pants, but with his luck he’d get arrested for indecent exposure. But he couldn’t help himself.
His hand pressed harder. He raked his knuckles along the line of his zipper from bottom to top, then carefully lowered his zipper. With the tips of his fingers he reached inside and gently caressed the length of his cock through his jockey shorts. Sliding up and down, slowly, delicately. He let his eyes drop closed and saw Fraser’s bright blue eyes smiling at him, encouraging him and he grew harder.
He pushed his underwear down and stroked himself slowly, so so slowly. He could see Fraser’s hand wrapped round him. Up, swipe of his thumb over the tip, down, squeeze, up, thumb, down. His movement was steady, but still slow. Enjoyable. He wasn’t ready to come yet, he wanted to savor the sensation. Fraser smiled at him and whispered his name. Ray’s breath stuttered, his heart beat fast and furious. Up, down, up, down. Squeezing and swiping and up and down.
Ray was startled by the sound of footsteps on the path behind him and opened his eyes. He jerked his hand up and shifted his coat to cover himself then leaned forward on the bench, elbows on his knees. He stared at the lake. His breath came hard, too hard for someone just sitting in the park. But then, he’d been enjoying himself more than the average visitor.
He held himself still and refused to look when he heard the stranger reach the bench and sit down beside him. “Ray.”
He closed his eyes and let his head drop. He tried to swallow his fear and act calm. “Fraser. W-w-what brings you out this afternoon? I thought you were on duty?”
“It’s ten after five, Ray. I was just taking Dief for a walk.” As soon as he said it, Ray heard splashing and looked up to see Diefenbaker taunting some birds at the water’s edge.
“Oh. Right.”
“Ray?”
“Yeah, Frase?”
“What were you thinking about?”
Ray turned a suspicious eye to Fraser. “What? When?”
“Before.” Fraser was looking at him like he could see into Ray’s soul. Like he had that night in the car. “Before I started walking over on the paved path.”
On the pavement? Did that mean he’d been there before Ray had heard his footsteps? Shit. “N-n-nothing, Fraser. Nothing. Just ... just nothing.”
“Oh.”
Ray thought maybe Fraser seemed a little disappointed by his answer. But what was he supposed to say? I was sitting here jerking off on a park bench imagining it was your hand on my cock?
Ray and Fraser sat in silence and watched Dief run around along the shore. It felt like hours had passed. It seemed darker, even though it wouldn’t really be dark for a few more hours. But time moved so slowly when you didn’t know what to say or do.
“Ray?”
Ray closed his eyes and tried to keep his breath steady. “Yeah, Frase?”
“Do you remember the story I was telling you on the last stakeout?”
Ray slowly turned his head to face Fraser, but said nothing.
“I said something about men in the wilderness and--” Fraser rubbed his thumb along his eyebrow. “And how sometimes--”
“You don’t have to say it, Frase. I remember.” Whispered words as Ray looked past Fraser’s shoulder at joggers in the distance.
“Ray--”
Nothing.
“Ray.” His name so quiet Ray barely heard it. “Ray. Ray. Ray.”
“Fraser.”
“Ray ... I--”
Ray stopped his words with the softest touch of his finger to Fraser’s lips. “Don’t, Fraser. Whatever you need to say, just ... don’t. I can’t--”
“Can’t what, Ray?”
“Can’t ... can’t pretend like--”
“Like you weren’t thinking about Stella when I interrupted you earlier?”
What? Did Fraser still think he was hung up on his ex-wife? Couldn’t he see? Ray felt his temper rise, all sense of calm fell away and he snapped. “Stella? I wasn’t ... Jesus, Fraser. I wasn’t thinking about Stella. I was thinking about you! I was sitting here with my cock out in public because no matter where I go, I can’t get you out of my head. I close my eyes and I see you. I see you looking at me like you did that night in the car and I just--”
Fraser was frozen, eyes wide. But he was listening, it was clear he was listening. “You just what, Ray?”
“I just want to know what you were thinking. In my mind I keep thinking you were looking at me like you wanted me. But then I think maybe you were trying to tell me that we’re just buddies, that we’ll never be nothin’ but buddies. No matter what. No matter how much wilderness and how alone we are.”
“Ray.”
“And I think that hearing that would...”
“Ray.”
“... just tear me up, Fraser. I don’t ...”
“Ray.”
“... think I could handle that.”
“Ray. Ray. Ray!”
“What?!”
And suddenly Fraser’s mouth was on his and his hand was slipping beneath Ray’s coat and finding him through his pants that he’d never zipped back up and he was hot and hard again and Fraser’s hand was cool and firm and touching him so perfectly and he forgot about the fact that they were in the park.
Ray let his head drop back as Fraser’s mouth moved down to his jaw and then his neck. “Fraser,” he whimpered as he felt himself pulled close to the edge. The surest of strokes and Ray’s back arched away from the bench and his vision went black and he was coming in Fraser’s hand. It had only taken a minute but it was amazing. Stella’d never made him feel that way.
Fraser moved in for another kiss, exploring Ray’s mouth with his tongue and Ray let him in. Really let him. He kissed back and his hands reached for Fraser and he felt Fraser’s uniform and his eyes snapped open. “Shit.”
Fraser pulled back immediately, worried he’d done something wrong.
“Jesus, Fraser. You just jerked me off on a park bench in your freakin’ uniform.”
Fraser’s skin flushed to match his red serge and he smiled shyly. “I’m sorry Ray, I just ... couldn’t help myself.”
This was supposed to be a little ficlet, maybe 300 words. It's 1,326 words. It has not been beta'd. It could probably be continued, but not at the moment. I can't believe I wrote this much. And if I wasn't sure before, I am now. I am so completely channeling Ray Kowalski today. Oh to be Ray. *sigh*
Title: I Couldn't Help Myself (tentative title)
Pairing: Fraser/RayK
Fandom: Due South
Rating: light NC-17
Ray sat alone on the park bench staring out at Lake Michigan. He’d come here a lot lately to just sit and stare at the water and think. Think about Fraser and what almost happened, but didn’t and why it couldn’t, but how he wished it could. Oh how he wished it could.
They were on a stakeout. Sitting in his car. Fraser telling another one of his weird Inuit stories that Ray never quite figured out the relevance of and then he’d said something about the things men do when alone in the middle of nowhere. Ray had been staring out his side window, watching the building, half listening, half working the case in his head. But at Fraser’s words, he’d turned his head sharply to find Fraser staring straight ahead. His face was calm, but his hands gave him a way. He was fidgeting, spinning his Stetson between those fingers. Those long, beautiful fingers. Ray’d never really noticed Fraser’s hands before that night and now he couldn’t get them out of his head.
So here he sat in the middle of the afternoon on bench by the lake. And while the sky was overcast, it was still light and he was clearly in the open. Anyone could see him. He shouldn’t be touching himself here, someone would see.
But he couldn’t help himself. He thought of Fraser constantly, but even more so when he was alone. In his mind his hands were Fraser’s and he couldn’t stop them. He pressed the heel of his hand to his crotch and groaned. His eyes darted in all directions, looking for passersby. Could anyone see him? He yet to opened his pants, but with his luck he’d get arrested for indecent exposure. But he couldn’t help himself.
His hand pressed harder. He raked his knuckles along the line of his zipper from bottom to top, then carefully lowered his zipper. With the tips of his fingers he reached inside and gently caressed the length of his cock through his jockey shorts. Sliding up and down, slowly, delicately. He let his eyes drop closed and saw Fraser’s bright blue eyes smiling at him, encouraging him and he grew harder.
He pushed his underwear down and stroked himself slowly, so so slowly. He could see Fraser’s hand wrapped round him. Up, swipe of his thumb over the tip, down, squeeze, up, thumb, down. His movement was steady, but still slow. Enjoyable. He wasn’t ready to come yet, he wanted to savor the sensation. Fraser smiled at him and whispered his name. Ray’s breath stuttered, his heart beat fast and furious. Up, down, up, down. Squeezing and swiping and up and down.
Ray was startled by the sound of footsteps on the path behind him and opened his eyes. He jerked his hand up and shifted his coat to cover himself then leaned forward on the bench, elbows on his knees. He stared at the lake. His breath came hard, too hard for someone just sitting in the park. But then, he’d been enjoying himself more than the average visitor.
He held himself still and refused to look when he heard the stranger reach the bench and sit down beside him. “Ray.”
He closed his eyes and let his head drop. He tried to swallow his fear and act calm. “Fraser. W-w-what brings you out this afternoon? I thought you were on duty?”
“It’s ten after five, Ray. I was just taking Dief for a walk.” As soon as he said it, Ray heard splashing and looked up to see Diefenbaker taunting some birds at the water’s edge.
“Oh. Right.”
“Ray?”
“Yeah, Frase?”
“What were you thinking about?”
Ray turned a suspicious eye to Fraser. “What? When?”
“Before.” Fraser was looking at him like he could see into Ray’s soul. Like he had that night in the car. “Before I started walking over on the paved path.”
On the pavement? Did that mean he’d been there before Ray had heard his footsteps? Shit. “N-n-nothing, Fraser. Nothing. Just ... just nothing.”
“Oh.”
Ray thought maybe Fraser seemed a little disappointed by his answer. But what was he supposed to say? I was sitting here jerking off on a park bench imagining it was your hand on my cock?
Ray and Fraser sat in silence and watched Dief run around along the shore. It felt like hours had passed. It seemed darker, even though it wouldn’t really be dark for a few more hours. But time moved so slowly when you didn’t know what to say or do.
“Ray?”
Ray closed his eyes and tried to keep his breath steady. “Yeah, Frase?”
“Do you remember the story I was telling you on the last stakeout?”
Ray slowly turned his head to face Fraser, but said nothing.
“I said something about men in the wilderness and--” Fraser rubbed his thumb along his eyebrow. “And how sometimes--”
“You don’t have to say it, Frase. I remember.” Whispered words as Ray looked past Fraser’s shoulder at joggers in the distance.
“Ray--”
Nothing.
“Ray.” His name so quiet Ray barely heard it. “Ray. Ray. Ray.”
“Fraser.”
“Ray ... I--”
Ray stopped his words with the softest touch of his finger to Fraser’s lips. “Don’t, Fraser. Whatever you need to say, just ... don’t. I can’t--”
“Can’t what, Ray?”
“Can’t ... can’t pretend like--”
“Like you weren’t thinking about Stella when I interrupted you earlier?”
What? Did Fraser still think he was hung up on his ex-wife? Couldn’t he see? Ray felt his temper rise, all sense of calm fell away and he snapped. “Stella? I wasn’t ... Jesus, Fraser. I wasn’t thinking about Stella. I was thinking about you! I was sitting here with my cock out in public because no matter where I go, I can’t get you out of my head. I close my eyes and I see you. I see you looking at me like you did that night in the car and I just--”
Fraser was frozen, eyes wide. But he was listening, it was clear he was listening. “You just what, Ray?”
“I just want to know what you were thinking. In my mind I keep thinking you were looking at me like you wanted me. But then I think maybe you were trying to tell me that we’re just buddies, that we’ll never be nothin’ but buddies. No matter what. No matter how much wilderness and how alone we are.”
“Ray.”
“And I think that hearing that would...”
“Ray.”
“... just tear me up, Fraser. I don’t ...”
“Ray.”
“... think I could handle that.”
“Ray. Ray. Ray!”
“What?!”
And suddenly Fraser’s mouth was on his and his hand was slipping beneath Ray’s coat and finding him through his pants that he’d never zipped back up and he was hot and hard again and Fraser’s hand was cool and firm and touching him so perfectly and he forgot about the fact that they were in the park.
Ray let his head drop back as Fraser’s mouth moved down to his jaw and then his neck. “Fraser,” he whimpered as he felt himself pulled close to the edge. The surest of strokes and Ray’s back arched away from the bench and his vision went black and he was coming in Fraser’s hand. It had only taken a minute but it was amazing. Stella’d never made him feel that way.
Fraser moved in for another kiss, exploring Ray’s mouth with his tongue and Ray let him in. Really let him. He kissed back and his hands reached for Fraser and he felt Fraser’s uniform and his eyes snapped open. “Shit.”
Fraser pulled back immediately, worried he’d done something wrong.
“Jesus, Fraser. You just jerked me off on a park bench in your freakin’ uniform.”
Fraser’s skin flushed to match his red serge and he smiled shyly. “I’m sorry Ray, I just ... couldn’t help myself.”