+ Stronger Than Ever [2PM]
Title: Stronger Than Ever
Rating: PG-13 (swearing)
Characters: Junsu, OT6
Word Count: ~4150
Notes: This was written a long time ago, back when Junsu's leg issue was actually relevant. Junsu's my homie, though, so I still wanted to post it. Massive props to biases for the beta.
Summary: Khun tries to talk him out of doing any more performances, worried about his health, his state of mind, his everything, but Junsu insists, because their whole means more to him than his one part, and he refuses to let them down while they're promoting.
+
When it happens, Taec is pretty much the best roommate he's ever been. Junsu gets back from the hospital, after his first performance with the cast was more painful than anyone had thought, and not one item of clothing litters the floor, both beds are impeccably made, and Taec's actually gone to the effort of spraying Junsu's favourite scent throughout the room, even though it makes him sneeze.
Taec helps him into his own bed carefully, carrying him like he weighs as much as his own arm and settling him down gently before tucking him in.
"Need anything else? A drink? A snack?"
"No thanks," he says tiredly, feeling his eyelids drooping against his will. "I just need sleep." His medication is kicking in right about now, and everything is pleasantly fuzzy and hazy.
"Okay," Taec says, reaching out to rub his shoulder before pulling away. "Sleep well, hyung. Fighting."
Junsu nods, and is asleep almost immediately. He can't remember his dreams when he wakes up hours later, but he wishes he could, if only to have something to distract him from the excruciating pain. As soon as he stirs it feels like his knee is on fire and he is left groaning into his pillow, clutching at his thigh.
Khun must hear and he rushes in to help, but he can only do so much, loading Junsu up with more drugs and sitting with him, talking about anything and everything and until he dozes off again.
The next time he wakes up, he feels much better. The pain in his leg has reduced to a constant, dull throbbing, and although it's still phenomenally sore, anything has to be better than before. Junsu yawns, stretches, and realizes that his head is resting in Khun's lap. He slowly manoeuvres himself up, moving as carefully as he can so as not to disturb his leg-or Khun. Khun's neck is twisted at a weird angle where he fell asleep against the wall though, so he has no choice but to shake him awake.
"Yah," he murmurs, jostling his foot. "Wake up."
Khun starts and blinks at him, sitting up straight. "Hyung! How are you feeling?"
Junsu smiles, and it's only half-forced. "I'm okay."
Khun grins widely and performs the 'okay' move. Junsu rolls his eyes and shoves at his shoulder, just as Chansung comes in and offers him a banana.
Junsu is touched, and gratefully accepts.
+
Khun tries to talk him out of doing any more performances, worried about his health, his state of mind, his everything, but Junsu insists, because their whole means more to him than his one part, and he refuses to let them down while they're promoting.
"Are you sure, hyung?" Khun says again, hands on his, liquid eyes so concerned that Junsu pulls him into a one-armed hug in the middle of their dressing room.
"It's fine. I just won't move around too much, and I'll try not to get in the way of your choreography."
"I think it's a good thing," Wooyoung says practically, poking his tongue out at the mirror in concentration, trying to get the silver headband to sit straight in his hair. "Junsu-hyung has the best voice out of all of us. If he isn't there to distract everyone from our complete lack of talent, then we're completely screwed."
Junsu rolls his eyes, reaching up to shove lightly at Wooyoung's hip, but he can't stop the grin from spreading across his face.
Chansung pouts. "Hey, I've been practicing! I'm pretty good, now."
"Not as good as hyung," Junho points out. He runs his hands down his black vest, smoothing out the wrinkles, and grins teasingly. "Or me."
"Or me," Taec calls from the make-up chair.
Junsu laughs, and keeps laughing until they're called onstage, Taec's aegyo not helping the matter at all.
+
Junsu is terrible at using a crutch. He doesn't have the best sense of his body's rhythm as it is-freestyling is one thing, but somehow, when it comes to following a prescribed set of motions, his body rebels. It always takes him the longest to master their choreo, and even now he just can't seem to time the swing of the crutch with when to step forward and it's all a disaster. Practicing at home leads him to walk into too many walls to count, and one time he would've fallen over and broken his other leg had Taec not been there to catch him.
He's just attempting another stroll down the hall when Junho steps out of the bathroom, steam curling around him, wet hair dripping onto his t-shirt. "Hyung," he says, frowning, "are you okay?"
Junsu, unable to bring himself to admit that he can tackle acrobatics but he can't even handle a stupid crutch, nods and tries to moderate his dialect as he lies.
"I'm fine. I'm just... ah... Waiting! For... the bathroom. I need a shower."
Junho frowns. "But what about your cast? Shouldn't you take a bath?"
"That's what I meant," he says quickly, struggling to hurry forward, forgetting in all his haste that he can't walk properly and feeling himself tip sideways.
Junho is with him in a flash, supporting him under the shoulder, and he grins at him. "If you're having problems," he says sensibly, "you should share them. One of us might be able to help."
Junsu's ears burn and he carefully doesn't look at him as he nods. He's always found it hard to ask for help, and he always will, because he's never liked admitting he can't do something-he'd much rather try and figure it out himself. It's bad enough they've had to have rails installed to help him bathe, but now if the others find out can't even walk?
They'd make fun of him for the rest of his life.
But Junho just tilts his head, regarding him closely. "You still haven't got the hang of it, have you?"
Then again, it's not like he's been very good at hiding his incompetence. Junsu nods miserably.
Junho holds out his hand.
"What you want…" he follows his gaze to the crutch, surprised. "You wanna try?"
Junho nods, wiggling his fingers.
"It's not that easy," Junsu protests, but Junho props him against the wall and takes the crutch anyway. "Yah, wait, it's all about balance and rhythm and-"
And Junho gets it on his first attempt, slipping the support under his arm, making his way to the end of the corridor and back again, grinning. "This is fun!"
Junsu glares at him. "I hate you."
"Come on, hyung, I'll teach you."
"I bet it's your butt," Junsu grumbles. "It stabilises you, or something."
"Stop complaining and just do it," Junho scolds.
It takes a couple of hours, but Junsu improves vastly after Junho plays some music and encourages him to get into the beat. When Junsu finally makes it up and down the hallway with minimal bruising, he decides to change his mind, because actually, he loves Junho.
+
It's Minjae-hyung's idea for Khun to make a deliberate spelling mistake on his cast, not that Junsu realises it at first. He spends the whole day teasing Khun about it, and Khun takes it all with a smile, before Minjae-hyung checks on Junsu's condition one last time that night and the truth comes out.
"This," Minjae says, pointing to the inscription, "was my idea. Good job Nichkhun-ah!" He beams and claps him on the back, finding the entire situation hilarious.
Junsu is just confused. "Khun," he says, after their manager has gone to bed, "why didn't you tell me?"
Khun smiles and shrugs. "It was fun. You were laughing, we were too. Don't feel bad, hyung."
Junsu takes a picture and posts about it on Twitter, but he doesn't mention his misunderstanding.
+
Girls dig the cast.
Seriously, it's like there are girl-magnets built into it, or something, because he has never received so much female attention in his life. When 2PM performs on Music Core Yuri and Tiffany can't get enough of him, constantly checking up on his leg and making sure he's okay. He gets three separate visits from members of f(x), the whole of After School delivers flowers to him personally, CL calls saying she got his number from Jiyong, one member from the Wonder Girls texts him at least once every hour, and all of the coordi-noonas fuss around him like they never have before.
In the beginning it makes him feel uncomfortable, but he's soon used to it, and he even tries his hand at a bit of awkward flirting. It doesn't escape his notice, too, how the other members (bar Khun, who seems perfectly happy to let someone else have the spotlight) watch on jealously, and as much as he loves them, he feels a surge of pride that he's finally getting some notice. Who cares if he had to half-break his leg to get it?
However, when Junsu is in the Inkigayo waiting room by himself, attempting to pull the bottom of his pants leg down over the cast, and Chansung creeps in, pouting and grumpy, he suddenly regrets the few smug looks he may have accidentally sent in his bandmates' direction.
"What are you doing?" Junsu is wary, wishing he could take a step back, but he needs help to get up from his chair, and Chansung knows that, the bastard.
"Hyung, are you okay?" he asks, although he seems far more annoyed than concerned. "Do you need anything? A massage? A drink? What about some watermelon?"
"Ah." Yes. That. So, he may have told Kara a stupid anecdote involving Chansung and some watermelon seeds. But it's not Junsu's fault if he got a bit carried away, is it? He's generally not good in social situations, and the conversation had been growing stilted and Junsu hadn't wanted it to end and then he'd noticed the fruit on the table and it reminded him of Chansung so he'd just… said it, and it had made the girls laugh, and they had all come away from the conversation satisfied. Didn't that make it a win/win situation? "Thanks, Chansung-ah."
"For what? For being the butt of your jokes?" He definitely looks angry, now, eyebrows knitted together, bottom lip sticking right out, dark eyes hurt, and Junsu can easily see him picking up the metal comb that's right near his hand and driving it through an important part of Junsu's anatomy. He shifts a little in his seat.
"No, Chansung-ah, for… providing entertainment. I'm very grateful," he says hurriedly, trying to sound genuine and not scared for his life. He may even let his accent slip through, because he knows that Chansung loves it, and if anything will gain him favour it's that.
Chansung's petulant tone, however, tells him it doesn't work. "Prove it, then."
And Junsu, ever the gullible one, before he can truly think about the possible consequences, says, "How?"
Chansung just breaks into a grin and opens the door with a flourish, ushering some people in. It's Gain and Narsha and they're bowing and looking concerned, but Chansung is just looking evil, and Junsu can't help but gulp.
A few minutes later, Chansung is finally finishing up the story about Junsu falling off the toilet, Gain is laughing so hard she's crying, Narsha is looking rather disturbed, and Junsu is completely writing off any chance he ever had with the opposite sex.
+
By the middle of the second week, he has an itch that is driving him insane. It is constant and awful and god, he cannot wait to get this stupid thing off, extra attention be damned.
Wooyoung happens to walk in on him one day when he's in a precarious position on the edge of the bathtub, hand in his pants as he shoves Khun's ruler down into the cast, trying to relieve some of the maddening prickling sensation there.
Wooyoung stops and raises his eyebrows, tilting his head as he absorbs exactly what’s happening. "If you need-" he starts to offer, but Junsu cuts him off.
"I don't need anything," he snaps, because the last thing he wants is another heroic offer of help-he just wants his fucking leg to stop itching.
"Okay." Wooyoung shrugs and stops in front of the sink, picking out his toothbrush and slathering toothpaste on it.
Junsu goes back to his attempted scratching, but now he feels bad for snapping at Wooyoung when he was only trying to help. "Sorry, Woodong-ah," he says.
Wooyoung spits out his toothpaste and washes his mouth before turning around, leaning against the counter. "My hands are smaller than yours."
"I know." He blinks. "Is that… what?"
He moves over to Junsu, swings one leg into the bath, braces himself against Junsu's body and swats his hands away, taking hold of the ruler. He gently presses it in further, and Junsu gasps.
Wooyoung stops. "Did that hurt?"
Junsu frantically shakes his head. "No, you got it, just-"
Wooyoung starts again, and Junsu sighs blissfully, finally getting some relief from the itching.
"Wooyoung, you're amazing," he breathes.
He snorts, and they continue for a few moments in silence, before Junsu adds, peering up at him, "How's your throat?"
"Not great," he says, the furrow between his eyebrows the only indication of any further feelings on the matter.
"You should rest more."
"We should all rest more."
"This could become permanent," Junsu says softly.
"So could yours." Wooyoung finally looks at him, eyes weary, and Junsu realizes just how much he's been going through. He's been too focused on his own health lately to notice, but he takes a moment to swear to himself that soon, he'll get back to being the hyung, and all the responsibilities that come with it. He wishes more than ever that Jay were here, but he can't afford to think about right now, he just can't, so-
"But they won't," he says firmly instead, and Wooyoung gives a small smile.
Someone clears their throat, then, and they both look up to see Taec standing in the doorway, towel draped over his shoulder, yesterday's make-up still smeared across his face.
"It's not what it looks like," Junsu declares immediately.
Taec nods, seeming skeptical.
Wooyoung slides his hand even deeper and Junsu grabs his shoulder, barely quashing what would be a rather embarrassing moan. "Unless it looks like I'm scratching his leg, in which case I am."
"Is that what the kids are calling it these days?" is all Taec says, before moving into the room and beginning to undress, not seeming to care that he has an audience.
Wooyoung doesn't even help Junsu up before making a noise of disgust and fleeing. Junsu nearly falls into the bath.
+
Being at home alone, while all of his bandmates are out fulfilling their hectic schedules, has to be one of the most horribly dull activities ever. Before he thought he wanted rest, just to be able to relax for a few days in peace and quiet, but in reality it's driving him crazy. He finds himself sitting and waiting, sometimes for hours, by the front door, anticipating the arrival home of anyone. He tries to write (prose, lyrics, poetry, anything) but all that comes is words that rhyme with 'cast', and shopping on the internet is tampered by the fact that everything needs to fit over his cast. He works out, but he can't get very far with his knee aching constantly, and he calls his family and friends but it's the middle of the day, and not many people can spare him much time.
One day, he gets quite close to the dorm's cleaning ahjumma, sharing life stories and jokes with her, but then she asks him for his number and he panics, making an excuse and locking himself in his room until she leaves. He tries again to compose, to distract himself, but gives up quickly. Instead he finds his laptop buried under some clothes and uses it to check Twitter and a few fan sites before watching some more fancams of their guerrilla concert, because he can never relive those moments enough.
He must fall asleep, because he finds himself woken up some time later by a gentle shake of his shoulder, and his eyes flutter open to see Khun grinning down at him.
"Yah," he croaks, rubbing his neck, "what time is it?"
"Early. I managed to finish up before everyone else." His grin gets wider. "I brought you a present."
Junsu pretends not be as touched as he feels, even though he knows Khun would have pulled some major strings to come home and look after him like this. "Really? Cool."
But Khun knows better, rolling his eyes and helping him out of bed, dragging him into the lounge room to hand him a plastic golf club and immediately launching into a game.
Junsu has the most fun he's had since the cast, and they spend the rest of the afternoon designing different golf courses, making them harder and harder, losing five different balls and almost breaking a window in the process.
+
Their goodbye stage at M!Countdown means performing Don't Stop Can't Stop, and Junsu can't help but feel nervous. He hasn't even practiced it since he hurt his leg, and, while he is in less pain, he can't say it isn't still incredibly sore, doing a very good job of constantly reminding him of his own failures.
As much as they tell him not to worry about it, it doesn't matter, they need him but not so much that makes his injury worse, the others are still relying on him, and he hates letting them down. So, once everyone except Taec comes home from their schedules, Junsu makes sure they're all asleep, hires a taxi and goes directly to the studio, Minjae-hyung's keys jangling in his pocket. He lets himself in feeling only a slightly rebellious thrill, and makes his way to their practice room, turning on the lights and slowly walking into the middle of the room.
He's wearing all black because it makes him feel better about sneaking around at night, and his cast sticks out of the bottom of his shorts like a giant white beacon, reflected and multiplied in every single mirror.
Junsu takes a few moments to stare at his reflection, really look at himself. He's been avoiding that, lately, and he probably shouldn't anymore. Every human being has flaws. A real artist is someone who recognizes and accepts those flaws, who takes advantage of the times when things aren't perfect, when things are tough, and uses them to create. A real artist wouldn't ignore the problem, they'd dig deeper, find the very essence of it and mine it for possibilities, and that's what he should be doing.
Besides, he's better now. He doesn't need the guys to carry him, he can dance again, even if his movement is still limited, and he can do this. He can do this.
He takes a deep breath, convincing himself, becoming used to the notion, before he shucks off his jacket and tosses it aside, moving over to the stereo system and selecting the right song.
As it starts up, he moves back to the middle of the room, breathing deeply, rolling his shoulders and stretching his limbs. He'll have to take it slow, at first-his body's been out of practice for too long. He begins by going through the basic motions at a half-pace, only simulating any movements that require him to lift his feet off the ground, and he's fine right up until Junho's verse, when his knee gives a twinge and he stumbles, struggling with keeping his balance during the simultaneous hip thrusts and arm flings.
"Shit," he hisses, and stalks-the best he can with a cast, anyway-over to the stereo to start the song again from the beginning.
This time he only gets a little further than before, but it's progression and it only makes him more determined that he's going to do it.
Finally, much later, panting, sweat-soaked and blocking out the pain, he makes it right through to the end, and as soon as the song stops, an arm wraps around his shoulders. Junsu wonders through his exhausted haze if he should panic, but he looks down, and he'd recognize Taec's tiny hands anywhere, so he relaxes into the embrace.
"What are you doing here?" he asks as they pull apart, taking in Taec's puffy eyes and weary stance. "You should be resting."
"Had to skip practice today for a taping. Gotta catch up."
He moves to drop his bag next to Junsu's jacket, and Junsu knows there's no way he'll be able to convince him to leave. But… does he really want Taec to see how weak he still is, how little he can still do, even though he's had the cast for weeks now?
"I can go," Taec offers, seeming to sense his discomfort and leaning down to grab his stuff again, but-
"Stay," Junsu blurts, because he's being stupid. Taec will never look down on him for his injury-he's been great the entire time Junsu has been injured, they all have, and Junsu feels guilty for thinking he'd be anything but.
Taec just grins, though, and things seem to slip back into place. "Great."
He and Taec practice late into the night. They don't say much, but knowing the other is there is enough.
+
When Junsu goes to get his cast off, he can't decide whether he's nervous or melancholy or excited-mostly, he thinks, he's just tired. His arm and shoulder and, basically, his entire right side, aches from the crutch, and he's walked into so many things by now that he has bruises all over his other leg and the cast is heavy and…
Okay. Maybe he's looking forward to it more than he thought.
The wait for his doctor in the patient room is kind of excruciating, made even more so by the fact that all of 2PM is with him. Chansung keeps touching everything, Taecyeon has chosen this very moment to teach Wooyoung Rain's Hip Song dance and Junho is sitting next to him on the bed, kicking his feet out and humming a tune that Junsu is starting to hate. Only Khun is quiet, but he's been that way since everything in Thailand.
Despite all of that, though, Junsu is secretly glad they came. They're a necessary distraction as he tries not to stare at the door and obsess over the next steps in his recovery plan.
When the doctor enters, everyone immediately dons their PR personas, charming and innocent and perfect, listening attentively as he asks Junsu a few questions, inspects his most recent x-ray, nods, and then gets out a medical saw. Junsu flinches, the possibility of the doctor being a psycho killer briefly flitting through his mind before the he puts the saw to the cast and slowly runs it down the length of Junsu's leg, first one side, then the other. It actually tickles a bit and Junsu squirms, trying to keep still.
When the doctor is finally done he hands the saw to the pretty nurse (who just about fainted when she walked in to see all six of them) and takes some plier-shaped things, separating the two pieces before carefully guiding the cast off. As he cuts through the cotton padding with scissors he starts talking, telling Junsu things he should probably be listening to, but he can't concentrate, and anyway, there are five other people here to remember for him.
He stares at his leg, experimentally moving it around. It's a lot thinner and the smell isn't all that great and it's strange having the air against his skin again, and he shivers in the hospital's too-powerful air conditioning. Khun's hand tightens on his shoulder.
"Yah, are you okay?" he murmurs, once the doctor turns around to fill out some paperwork. Junho leans in to listen concernedly.
Junsu nods. "Yeah. It just feels weird." He stretches down to press his foot gently onto the floor, leaning heavily on the bed, and puts a small amount of weight on it, testing his strength.
It'll take months to slowly build up the strength he had before, to be able to dance and do acrobatics to the best of his ability, and he's definitely lost a lot of his muscle mass which will be a bitch to get back, but he knows that eventually, with some hard work, it will come.
Plus, he thinks, as Wooyoung and Chansung help him stand up properly and Taecyeon spots him, he always has his members to help out if he needs it.
And so, taking a deep breath, Junsu holds on and steps forward.
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