Demetri Martin, you have inspired me to become a comedian. Thank you for your words of wisdom and your adorable big nose.

A quick way to start a conversation is to say something like, "What's your favorite color?" A quick way to end a conversation is to say something like, "What's your favorite color...person?"

Writerz block.

Uhhh no one reads this.
So I'm going to make a politically incorrect joke.

What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction?
Jail break

What do u call 1,000 black people on a plane back to Africa?
A good start.

hahaha

I'm a stupid ho.

It's the perfect time of day
It's the last day of your life
Don't let it drift away
While your heart is still racing
It's the perfect time of day

Come on now
It's the perfect time of day
It's the perfect time with you

Well there's a reindeer inside of me
And it's tryin, tryin to get out
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, on Vixen, on Comet, on Cupid
Oh cupid, oh cupid, OH!

Good lord.
What a subtly sexual song.

But my heart, it don't beat, it don't beat the way it used to ( Read more... )

Brendon Urie update your livejournal.

Please?

Suppppp ( Read more... )

Ever notice how many people lean outside the window to stare you down while you're running? There was at least five on my jog around town. I'm disgusted ( Read more... )

worst weekend ever.

thanks mom&dad
and my so called "friends"
-love your BEST FRIEND?

Fuck you.
You're a sick little shit, you know that?