Thomas Jefferson: Our first Polyamorous President?

[morgaath]

Polyamory is having the ability to love more then one person at a time.
Jefferson had a wife... and a mistress.
Did he love them both?

Damn, I hate having thoughts like this just as I walk out the door to go to work.
No time to do research.

This is what happens when you think "All Men are created Equal" in the shower.

Comments

[reannon]

I think we've had quite a few leaders who loved their wives and their mistresses. It's just that they didn't have the social framework to do so openly. Poly tendencies are far more common than the general public would like to believe. Or that's my theory.

[morgaath]

I am with you in that belief.
We just live in a society that is afraid of love.
Maybe that is the new tag line; "They hate us for our love".

[morgaath]

I forgot to say, what I want to know is did Jefferson love his wife?

[ldyalia]

Actually, most of the staff at Monticello was aware of his love for his mistress, but the fact that she was one of his servants was hidden by shame from his daughter when he passwed away. Women of that era had nothing better to do than gossip and it was shameful how backwards they made society.

[morgaath]

A lot of modern folks gossip about others, and normally things that are good are not of interest.

How often do we hear about the celebrity marriages that are going along just fine?

I guess the question I am trying to get to is did Jefferson love his wife? I think it is a given that he loved his mistress. He could have gotten rid of her at any time if he did not. No one would have said a word about a white man having sex had with his slave.

(((XOXOX)))

[queen_etain]

Most information i have read is on his mistress. I have not come across much on the wife. So lets look at what it was like back then..

Most marriages (at the time Jefferson would have married) were still being arranged.. It was not until the 1830-1840's that women were starting to work in the factories and having more of a say in their lives..This is when the marriage for love concept really started coming prevelant even though a family could still say NO if they did not approval of the union.

Chances are Jefferson had grown to love/care his wife in some fashion but not neccesarily a love by todays standards but in honor and duty.

and its funny you are thinking along this line. I have just been studying this and Monday night we had an interesting debate over the mistress at the bar.. It was funny how many people chimed in on the subject. (DNA results and so forth... I was like dang i most be living under a small tree for i did not know that many people were interested in history like that.. lol)

[queen_etain]

Oh and there was a smear compaign done against him for the supposed relationship ... He denyed the relationship..

Though it was not unheard of it occuring it was something no-one wanted publicly known or attached too.